Love Me Not

Chapter 7

“Eve there you are,” Yas asked spotting the dark haired girl who he was searching for at the end of the corridor. He ran to catch up with her stopping only a few meters away from the teenage girl. 

She looked at him confused, “Did I miss a training or something. I’m so sorry I didn’t realise.”

“It’s nothing like that,” Yas said shaking his head emphatically. “I was just wondering if you wanted to talk. It feels like we haven’t talked for ages.” He was going to do it if he could. He’d stayed up all night wrestling with the question of what to do but he had finally decided that he had to tell Eve. Otherwise, how could he call her his friend?

Eve tilted her head and he was unable to read her face that was so expressive on the ice, “Sure I’m about to have breakfast. You can join me if you want but you have to actually eat with me and not me on my unhealthy breakfasts.”

Yas smiled at her light-hearted response and something lifted inside him at the idea of having breakfast with Eve, “That won’t be a problem. I haven’t eaten today.” He added feeling compelled to talk and fill the silence before he bit his tongue. It wasn’t that Eve scared him but whilst he was talking he was in control of the conversation and wasn’t put onto the back seat.

“That’s good,” Eve said smiling. “I feel like we haven’t had any time to talk for ages.”

That was an understatement but Yas didn’t get why Eve was saying that. She was always rushing around with her friends dancing from conversation to conversation—this was one of the first times he had seen her alone in the last week. He forced down his disagreements with her statement and instead smiled broadly. “Never you’re one of the bear squad. We’ve just both been busy.”

“What have you been up to though? I feel like I haven’t seen you anywhere except the ice rink.” Eve pushed. She was right—he hadn’t been anywhere that she would be recently. Yas didn’t like to be second in anything not in the results and certainly not to his friends.

Yas looked away from Eve unable to meet her eyes and he kept on walking faster. He wouldn’t be able to tell Eve what he needed to tell her until they were sitting down at the table. That would at least make it harder for her to runaway from him. “Not much,” he deflected. “Mostly just sleeping and skating Javier’s always on my back about it.”

“Sleeping and skating sounds good,” Eve agreed. “But I can’t do either of those properly so I guess that I’ll just have to leave it.”

Yas looked at her confused. He knew that she had this thing in her head that her injury in her foot somehow diminished her abilities as a skater but the second part of it he didn’t understand, “You can’t sleep?”

Eve brushed her hair out of her face and he only now noticed the large bags under her eyes, “I’ve been having nightmares on and off since February.”

“Since Pyeongchang?” Yas questioned confused by this situation. He couldn’t help but want to know what was wrong with Eve and to help her. It angered him in a way he couldn’t understand to know that she hadn’t told him before, “Have you told anyone about this?”

“Only Alina and that was because I’ve woken her up to many times,” Eve said in an offhand manner. “Nathan keeps on asking why I’m yawning but I didn’t want to tell him.”

Yas felt a rush of pleasure fill him that he couldn’t name at learning that Eve had taken him into her confidence, “I promise I won’t tell anyone Evgenia.” Something about the solemnity of the situation prompted him to use her full name and they both started laughing as soon as he had stopped talking. 

“I’d missed this,” Eve said pushing open the door to the canteen. “We haven’t talked like this in forever.”

“Same,” Yas agreed and he couldn’t help but hope that next season with her training with him by his side they would be able to maintain their close friendly relationship. “So what do you recommend for an unhealthy breakfast?” 

“These are pretty decent,” Eve said filling a bowl with coco pops for Yas and then one for herself. Pouring cold milk into both of them she passed Yas a bowl. 

‘Thanks,” he said unimpressed with the fare. Normally opted for the more healthy porridge that was offered with perhaps some fresh fruit but if he was going to tell Eve about the night on the balcony he’d better win as many points so he could be in her good books. He passed her a spoon before heading to one of the booths.

Eve sat down a couple seconds after him pushing her phone back into her jumper pocket with a struggle, “What did you want to grab me for? You can tell me anything you know—we’re friends.”

She was right they were friends which meant he had to what was right and best for her even if it would be difficult for him. “Well it’s just that we’re friends and as a result, I feel as though I owe it to you to tell you something--,” Yas began before Eve’s phone started ringing. 

“I’m so sorry,” Eve said pulling her phone out and declining the call. She nodded at him as though to prompt him to continue.

Yas bit his tongue trying to find the right word as he couldn’t help but feel the moment had been lost. “It’s just that--,” 

Eve’s phone started ringing merrily again and Yas wasn’t sure if he was grateful or not for it distracting Eve. “It’s Nathan again,” Eve said looking at the phone “Is it okay if I pick up just because he wouldn’t be calling me again if it wasn’t important.”

“Sure,” Yas said tightly. He shovelled down coco pops trying to understand why Eve liked them so much as he watched the dark-haired girl opposite stand up and walk a dozen or so paces away so presumably he wouldn’t be able to overhear what she was saying.

He could still see her smiling and laughing as she talked to Chen though Yas selfishly thought that she had been more animated and had had more fun when she had been with him. He watched her twirl a strand of her hair in her fingers and felt some sort of hotness almost like rage rise in his chest and he wanted to break the phone that she clutched next to her ear. He didn’t though and instead, his grip merely grew tighter around the spoon until he could almost see the whites of the bone through his translucent skin and simply continued to eat the chocolate cereal. 

Eve hung up the phone and returned quickly with light steps to their booth, “I’m so sorry about that Nathan was just checking about whether I was at breakfast already and I invited him to join us if that’s okay.” She paused glancing at Yas and he made an attempt to conceal the feeling that he could feel building up inside him, “Anyways what were you going to tell me?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Yas said quickly deflecting her question. 

Eve frowned before asking probingly and looking slightly confused, “And you’re okay with Nathan joining us?”

Yas smiled as broad and as earnestly as he could muster, “Totally.”

…

He was totally not okay with it he decided. The conversation between him and Eve had been awkward for the next five to ten minutes until Nathan arrived with a massive plate filled with bacon, eggs sausages and toast. Him having arrived the conversation basically just became him and Eve trading referencing to pop culture that Yas didn’t understand making him feel stupid. And he wasn’t stupid.

He instead stayed mostly silent letting Eve and Nathan do the majority of the talking only venturing out with the occasional chime in agreement. However, it was only when he realised that Eve had having finished her coco pops discarded the bowl and was now nibbling on Nathan’s bacon that Yas started to get annoyed. Didn’t she understand that that was a health hazard and she was risking receiving Chen’s unhealthy American germs? 

He opted to shoot her a pointed look and was rewarded with Eve withdrawing her hand from the plate as though it was burning hot. Inside he felt triumphant but he instead forced a considerate smile when Chen asked Eve if she was okay. 

Finishing his coco pops which had by now lost their flavour and tasted like straw in his mouth Yas spoke up for the first time since Chen had arrived, “I’m going to go now—I might see if I can get a skate in before group practice.”

“I thought you booked the ice for the morning slot before the group session,” Eve said turning to where Nathan was sitting beside her

Nathan glanced at Yas for the first time, “Yeah I reserved it starting in like five minutes—that’s why I’m grabbing an early breakfast. Sorry man you can grab it after me if you’d like they’ll still be sometime before practice for everyone else starts. “

Yas smiled as cordially as he could muster though he could see in the mirror opposite from where he was sitting that in truth it resembled a grimace more than it did a smile. “In that case, I’ll just see if I can catch Javier around.” He stood up and left the room not letting himself look back.

…

“You okay there?” Nathan asked Eve snapping herself out of watching Yas leave.

Eve bit her lip slightly conflicted about how much she ought to tell him, “I think he wanted to talk to me about something but I’m not sure what.” He had seemingly wanted to tell her something but had backed out of it when Nathan had called her earlier that day. 

Nathan frowned, “Did I get in the way—If so I’m sorry.”

“I don’t matter. If he wouldn’t tell me once he knew that you were coming I’m not sure if he would have told me anyway,” Eve said sighing. “Can I come with you when you go to the rink now cause I need some air.” 

“Sure. I’m done anyway so we can get a start on it,” Nathan said standing up before shuffling out of the small booth and waiting for Eve to follow him. “If you could take a look at my new exhibition that’d be great.” 

“Totally,” Eve agreed following Nathan out of the canteen willingly. She needed to get her mind off of whatever was going on with Yas and there was nothing better than the ice to help her with that. Helping Nathan with his programs would also make her feel useful as often at the moment as she was unable to jump. “I’m sure it will be really good. What music are you using?”

“You’ll see when I show you,” Nathan said elbowing the Eve in the ribs lightly.

She laughed at the contact before retaliating in kind, “Stop it. Besides you’re just going to have to tell me later when you play it on the speakers.”

“When is the key work in that question as you can hear it but I want you to be able to take in everything for the first time when I show it to you,” Nathan said explaining charmingly. 

Eve nodded in agreement at least she only had to wait for a few minutes before she’d be able to listen the music. “Any spoilers,” she joked as they entered the rooms around the rink. It was freezing cold inside, as they were the first people on the rink that day.

“No,” Nathan laughed. “I said that I wasn’t going to tell you. Just wait 10 minutes Eve. I need to get my skates on and then you can see.”

Eve pouted before smiling at Nathan, “Left skate first.”

“Always,” Nathan said laughing sitting himself down on the bench and starting to pull his skates on one after the other. “Are you doing an individual exhibition?”

“I’m not really sure right now. My duet with Yas is taking up all of my time because he’s insistent on us winning the unofficial competition for the best small group,” Eve explained thinking through the next few weeks. “Besides my current exhibition doesn’t work well without the jumps and I haven’t been able to put together a new one.” She hadn’t really been able to put enough thought into the dilemma of whether to do an ex or not as whilst she did want to do one. Besides, when it came to her exhibitions she liked to have a story to say especially considering she didn’t have that much control over her competition program. 

“Yas sounds intense. The boys and I are just going to try and have fun and not break any records in the pairs discipline,” Nathan joked before standing up his skates ready at last.

Eve laughed at his comment, “He’s not that intense he’s a sweetie normally. He just doesn’t like to be second best at anything even when it comes to an exhibition show program as he compares himself to everyone else.”

“You seem to know him quite well,” Nathan said perceptively as he busied around the speakers setting up his phone to play the music. 

Eve smiled at this point of Nathan’s because regardless of her insecurity when it came to facing Yas it couldn’t be denied that out of the people on the international figure skating circuit she was one of his closest friends. “Thanks,” She said after a few seconds. “You going to actually skate.”

“Jeesh Eve I’m going to start,” Nathan said mock-angrily at Eve who couldn’t help but giggle at his tone. He passed the small remote to Eve before stepping onto the ice. He gestured at her to queue the music and she obliged letting the thin reedy sounds of the flutes backed up by the warmth of the string start to fill the room. 

The actual skating was beautiful and Eve couldn’t help but wish that his programs had the same level of complexity in the transitions and movements when he was doing his monstrous six quad competitions routines. The few jumps he did were landed cleanly on the accents in the music with some of the best landings she had seen him do. It was just the music that confused her. She felt as though she recognised it from somewhere and it fitted the program well with enough flourishes for him to be able to land his quads and rousing enough to make an ex from. By the time Nathan finished his performance sinking into a bow on the ice with the final crescendo in the music, Eve was thoroughly hooked into what he was performing. 

He skated over to her slightly out of breath with his hair slicked at the front with sweat. “So was the music worth it.”

“It was nice,” Eve agreed. It had been indeed it was the type of music she might even recommend using for a competition program as it had visible spots for jumps built into it. “But was I supposed to recognise it.”

“Wait you didn’t get the music—then you won’t have understood the point of the program. “ Nathan said looking shocked. “Besides how do you not recognise the music from the lord of the rings.”

“Lord of the what,” Eve repeated back confused at Nathan’s point. “And I got the story I think—it’s of a young boy who grows up and into the destiny that he was born into and his journey from nobody into someone great.” She loved trying to create an analysis out of programs and teasing implications out of the slightest most intricate movement.

“Hole in one,” Nathan said looking impressed at Eve’s deduction skills and she couldn’t help but feel happy. “But you don’t know what lord of the ring’s are?”

“Nope,” Eve said shrugging.

Nathan looked pensive for a second, “Aragon, Frodo, Gandalf, Sauron, the one ring to rule them all.”

“Are you going crazy,” Eve asked squinting at the boy who was saying various words, which didn’t seem to make grammatical or logical sense.

“Are you free tomorrow for nine hours,” Nathan asked completely seriously. 

Eve was puzzled by this, “I think I might have a training with Yas though I can get out of it and why?”

Nathan bit his lip, “Well do that. I mean skip the training and we need at least nine hours if you want to watch the three original movies and the extended editions in one day.”

“Wait what,” Eve asked almost laughing in confusion. “Why are we watching nine hours of movies.”

“Because they are iconic and I can’t believe you’ve never seen them,” Nathan said as though it was obvious and Eve wanted to hit him on the head with something hard. “Text Yas now.”

“Sure,” Eve said still laughing at Nathan’s earnestness as she typed her text into her phone. Is it okay if we reschedule tomorrow’s session to the evening because something’s come up? It was a thoroughly lame message but at this point, she didn’t care about how Yas might react as his behaviour in the last week seemed to sway between hating her and being her friend

She might have cared more though if her hearing had been sharp enough to register a phone receiving a text message in the gallery above which she couldn’t see and if she had been able to see its owners face scowl in anger. As it were both she and Nathan jumped upon hearing the door above them slam shut with a vengeance