Loving Judas

Chapter One.

Several times during the seemingly endless ride Alice tried to talk to Judas, each time she raised her voice to speak he got on the throttle and the motorcycle tuned her out and she realized he was doing it on purpose. 

She finally gave up and tried to enjoy the ride, her parents were dead. The thought kept threatening to break the surface of her subconscious but she kept it pushed back knowing it would break her to think about it now. 

She had to admit despite the circumstances the ride on the back of his bike was exhilarating, the roar of the engine, the wind in her face, and he in complete control of every inch of power. 

The sun slowly dropped behind the trees and having been riding non-stop she grew tired. Her legs ached and her arms throbbed from gripping onto Judas, her eyes burned with fatigue. When the large group pulled over into a motel parking lot she was relieved. Judas parked next to his father and swung off the bike with ease, Alice tried to follow and stumbled on her tired legs she fell into his side and he caught her by the back of her hoodie.

“s**t, you can hardly even stand on your own two feet.” He growled.

“I'm sorry.” She mumbled trying to right herself.

He released her and strode away, she stumbled at the sudden lack of support and nearly fell into his bike. A warm hand grabbed her arm and gently steadied her.

“He doesn't mean anything by it,” Rogue said from beside her.

“I don't think he likes me very much.” She admitted.

“He doesn't like anybody, you'll get used to it,” Rogue told her.

She gave a slight nod but felt less than convinced, did she want him to like her? Did she really think she could make a living with these men? She looked around the group that had formed a semicircle and were now stretching their legs, smoking cigarettes, and talking to one another. 

There were about twenty of them, mostly all older than her and some the same age as pops. They all wore leather jackets that read the disciples across the back with a cross. They looked like the kind of crowd she would normally avoid, but something about them felt safe.

Rogue released his hold on her arm and walked towards a group of two other men, one a young redhead with freckles and the other an older man with tattoos and a long black ponytail, the second man was large and had a beard the way he watched Alice made her skin crawl.

“Alice my dear, come here," Pops called.

Tucking her hair behind her ear in a nervous gesture she made her way towards Judas and Pops. 

A few other bikers looked at her but it was the one with the ponytail that made her uncomfortable and made her want to squirm. When she reached the two leaders Judas took a step away from her and lit a cigarette, Pops draped his arm around her shoulders pulling her to his side.

“We're going to get a couple of rooms and camp here tonight, are you okay sharing a room with Judas?” Pops asked and Judas mumbled under his breath.

“Yes, sir.” She said.

“Call me pops you're family now.”

“I ain't babysitting her all the time,” Judas said.

“She just needs a little help, for now, she'll get on her feet,” Pops said.

“Well see to it she does, because I'm not spending the rest of my time babysitting some kid,” Judas said with venom in his voice.

“She'll be perfect, you'll make sure of it,” Pops said, hugging her close.

“Me?” Judas asked.

“Yeah, you're going to teach her. Everything she needs to know.” Pops said, his voice leaving no room for discussion.

Judas looked at her with and she could see the anger in his eyes and she felt small and insignificant, dropping her head to break their staredown she saw the man with the ponytail still staring at her and she shrunk closer to Pops. 

These men screamed danger and destruction, she didn't know why she agreed to go with them or had stayed this long. Judas was terrifying and the man watching her made her skin crawl, Pops and Rogue were the only two who had been civil to her.

“Come on let me introduce you to the club,” Pops said, steering her towards the other men.

One by one starting with Rogue she learned the names of the twenty men in the group, when they reached the redhead and the man with the ponytail she hesitated as the man looked her up and down like a piece of meat, the redhead was young, from up close he looked no older than his early twenties. 

She learned the redhead was Widow and Reaper was the man who sent chills down her spine and a shiver through her soul, he was bigger than Judas possibly the biggest man there, he was covered in tattoos and she estimated his age to be well in his forties.

“This is......well, she doesn't have a nickname yet but she's a new member.” Pops beamed.

“Hell Pops, what're we going to do with some kid?” Widow asked.

“I remember a few years ago you were just some kid, bite your tongue,” Pops said.

“Well, who is going to watch her?” Widow asked.

“Judas, he's going to train her and she's going to be his new project,” Pops said.

“Judas can't train a girl he can barely take care of himself, give her to me,” Reaper said, speaking up for the first time.

His voice was deep and scratchy, his eyes took her in and she felt an uneasiness grow in her stomach. 

“That's my son you're talking about, watch your mouth. Judas will be fine.”Pops said.

“He's a drunk and a violent one, the first time he drinks he'll snap her in half,” Reaper said.

“Judas is as protective as someone can be, he'll guard her with his life.” Widow said, sticking up for Pops.

“Unless he kills her himself.” Reaper pointed out.

Pops shook his head and turned Alice towards the motel where Judas walked out and began handing out keys and ordering bikers to different rooms. Reaper and Widow were in room 3, Pops and Rogue were in room 1, and Judas and Alice were in room 2, she didn't listen to where the other men were. 

Pops took the key giving Judas a nod and Alice a gentle shove towards him, she hesitated but Pops didn't notice as he walked away towards his room. Judas opened their door and motioned her inside.

“I'm going out.” He said, slamming the door as soon as she was inside.

She heard his motorcycle roar to life a second later and head down the road, she rubbed her arms even though she was wearing a hood, she was suddenly very cold.

 The motel room was nice enough, but obviously a pay by the hour kind of place. She turned and slid the tiny gold chain in place, feeling more secure with the door locked, she wasn't comfortable being alone after what happened. She considered going to find Rogue, he seemed nice enough but her fear or bikers, in general, loomed after what happened to her parents.

There was a knock on her door and she stood on tiptoe to look out the spyhole, Rogue was standing on the other side, she opened the door as far as the chain would allow and peeked out at him.

“I brought food.” He said, lifting the vending machine sandwich.

She closed the door and removed the chain before letting him inside, he brushed passed her and she took a step back. He seemed nice enough and harmless but he frightened, she knew how violent men could be she saw what they'd done to her parents.

“Where's Judas?” He asked.

“He left, as soon as we got here.” She replied closing the door.

“Probably out getting drunk,” Rogue said, flipping on the television.

“Will.....will he hurt me? If he drinks?” She asked.

“Who told you that?” He asked tossing the remote down.

She didn't reply, she just stood there and Rogue shook his head tossing her food down onto the far bed.

“Reaper?” He asked.

“Yeah, he said Judas would kill me.” She said.

“He's a violent man when he drinks, he goes to a dark place that even pops usually can't get him out of but he'd never hurt someone without cause. He won't hurt you.” Rogue promised.

“I'm afraid of him.” She admitted.

“Yeah, so is everyone else except Pops and Reaper because he's too damn dumb to know he should be.” Rogue teased.

When he smiled she could see a sweet boyish charm about him, his blue eyes and sandy blonde hair made him look younger than his peers. He almost seemed innocent and carefree.

“How old are you?” She asked suddenly.

“I'm twenty-one, why? How old are you?” He asked.

“Nineteen.” She said.

“I was eighteen when I joined up with this bunch. I was homeless and an orphan, I stole what I wanted and had a rough past. Pops found me trying to pick his pocket and he gave me another option. Joining with them was the best decision I ever made, it's not always easy being part of the club but I always have a home and a family.” He said.

“How old is Judas?” She asked.

“He's twenty-five, He is Pops only family member well the only one by blood. We're all Pops kids in this group.” Rogue said with a boyish smile.

She reached over for one of the plastic-covered sandwiches and opened it, it looked questionable but she was starving.

She took a bite of the sandwich and swallowed, Rogue sat on the bed studying her for a few minutes before he pushed to his feet and spoke.

“Eat and then try and get some rest.” He said, turning the tv volume down to nothing.

She gave a nod her mouth to full for her to reply verbally and he smiled, he was cute when he smiled and she briefly thought that under other circumstances she may have had a crush on him. He walked past her and out the door. She put her sandwich down just long enough to scramble after him and lock the door with the tiny gold chain.

She finished her sandwich while watching an old movie that was on cable, then she moved into the bathroom. She peeled off her jeans and socks laying her clothes in the sink, she stepped into the shower the hot spray easing the pain and stiffness in her muscles. She washed her hair with the complimentary shampoo and dried off with a big fluffy white towel.

Then she stood in the bathroom debating what to wear for clothing, she didn't want to sleep in her jeans but had nothing else to wear and the thought of sleeping nude made her uncomfortable. She decided that her black t-shirt she'd been wearing under her hoodie appeared clean enough and fit loose enough she could wear it and her undies. 

She pulled the band t-shirt over her head and it fell just a little below her hips, she pulled her plain black cotton panties on and soaked all her other clothes in the sink before hanging them on the shower curtain rod to dry overnight.

She climbed into the queen-sized bed furthest from the door and turned off the television, she let the lamp beside the bed on needing the light. She pulled up the covers and realized now how tired she was, glancing at the clock she saw it was eleven at night just before she fell into a deep sleep.

She was startled awake by a loud banging and she bolted upright in the bed. The banging came from the other side of the door and a chill ran up her spine. 

Trembling in fear she slipped from the bed, she wanted to look and see who it was. As she crossed the soft carpeted floor the door suddenly flew open, the tiny gold chain breaking under the impact of a booted foot, she screamed and fell back onto her butt.

“Why the hell did you lock me out?!” Judas raged.

“I'm sorry.” She whimpered.

“You should be!” He yelled, kicking the door shut behind him.

She crab-walked backward as he strode closer, he threw his heavy leather jacket to the floor and began kicking off his heavy biker boots. She pushed unsteadily to her feet backing away as he pursued.

“Stop looking at me like that!”He ordered.

“Like what?” She asked.

“Like you're little red riding hood and I'm the big bad wolf about to eat you alive. Although it is tempting, you're not my type.”He said.

She swallowed past the lump in her throat.

He moved towards the bathroom stripping off his black t-shirt in the process, she looked away trying not to stare but she'd never been this close to a real man before. The boys in her old school had taken her out on a few dates but all of them were skinny young boys, this was a man. His back was corded with rippling muscle and a crisscrossing of scars. He slammed the door behind him without another glance in her direction and she climbed into her bed, he was only in the bathroom a few seconds before he came back out cursing like a sailor.

“What the hell is hanging from the curtain rod? Why did you take your damn clothes off?”He asked.

“I needed them cleaned, I'm sorry.” She said.

“Well go get your s**t out of there.” He motioned to the bathroom.

She jumped from the bed skirting around him to grab her things from the bathroom. 

When she came back out he was staring her down like a rabid dog before it attacked. He caught her arm and she flinched away, his grip tightened nearly pulling her off of her feet.

“Where'd you get that shirt?”He asked, his voice softening.

“It's mine.”She said.

She tried not to look into those eyes, they were so dark it frightened her but looking anywhere else only heated her cheeks. His chest was strong and muscular, his arm and forearms dusted with black hair his chest was hairless but he had a tattoo over his heart of a small rosebud.

“Atlas Genius, I've never met anyone else who liked that band.” He said.

She looked up at him finally completely confused with his attitude, it was then she noticed the scent of alcohol lingering around him, he was drunk. He smirked when he noticed her taking in his entire body.

“Why don't you get into bed and I'll freshen up, then maybe I can join you.” He said, reaching out he stroked a finger down her cheek and she flinched away.

“No.” She said softly.

“Okay, suit yourself.” He said with a sigh releasing her arm.

She stared at him as he began undoing his pants but making no move to touch her again. Was he going to rape her? Was he waiting for her to let her guard down?

“That's it?”She asked when she couldn't take it anymore.

“I'm not going to force you into my bed.” He said as if it were obvious.

She moved to her bed and hung her clothes on the small radiator next to it, before climbing in and under the covers. He watched her then went into the bathroom, she heard the shower turn on and a few minutes later he emerged. He was wearing only his black boxers and his black hair fell in his eyes dripping with water, he climbed into bed and lay in silence for a minute before he spoke.

“This light isn't going to work.” He said, he switched off the bedside lamp she had left on.

She tensed in the darkness but didn't protest as if sensing her hesitation he spoke.

“Relax, nobody in their right mind would come in here when I'm here with you.” He said.

She chewed on her lip but didn't say anything, she missed her mom and her dad. 

She felt tears in her eyes and her throat growing tight with unshed tears but she didn't want to cry, not now with him in the bed next to hers. She swallowed and tried to push it down but a few tears tracked down her cheeks and she stifled a sob with her hand. She heard Judas roll over in the bed but if he heard her crying softly he didn't mention it and she was grateful. She fell into a deep, dreamless sleep sickened with sadness but at least feeling safe knowing that the man in the room with her may be dangerous but at least he'd keep her safe.