Let the Music Say I Do-8
734 Words
The lake cabin had been where Joey and I first made love. He didn’t just share it with anybody. In fact, he’d told me in a moment of rare sharing that I was the only person he’d ever let stay over. It was special to him in a way that I still didn’t understand, and maybe it was time I did.
It took four hours of driving north to get to the cabin. Tucked away at the end of a long gravel road, it looked cozy in the rustic setting. I parked next to Joey’s SUV and got out. It was a little after ten o’clock, and I stretched to pop my spine.
I walked up to the door and knocked. A few seconds later, it opened, and Joey stood there, naked to the waist in a pair of frayed jeans cutoffs—the only thing he wore. Involuntarily, my mouth watered. It dried up quick, though, at the instant anger that appeared on Joey’s face.
“You’re here why, exactly?” he asked, barring entrance to the cabin.
“Come on, Joey. Let me in.”
“No. This is my home, and you’re not welcome here.” He made to shut the door, but I stopped it from closing with my foot.
“Please, Joey. I want to apologize, to talk to you.”
His eyes widened, then he scowled as he flung the door wide. He shoved me hard in the chest, causing me to stumble backward. He was furious.
“Since when do you ever apologize for anything, Jared? You know everything, right? Everyone is wrong, and you’re right. You’re the expert on perfect human behavior, and when things don’t go according to your perfect plan, it’s a problem, because there couldn’t be any other way things could go, huh?”
He moved toward me, and I kept walking backward until I hit the hood of my car. This was a side of him I’d never seen before, and I was out of my depth.
“Joey, wait. I—”
He loomed over me. “You have all the answers, don’t you, Jared? How smug are you, in your self-satisfied, perfect little world? You’ve never been homeless, or had to fend for yourself on the streets, you know? You wouldn’t understand how hard it is to trust human emotion, love,” he spat the word out, “because you’ve never had it taken away from you, unable to get it back, or even earn it. You’re a judgmental prick, and I’m tired of doing things according to your tune.”
He placed his hands on either side of me and leaned in, his face close to mine. I could smell his skin. It was cool outside, and I could see the goose bumps as they popped up on his arms.
“I’m a ‘f*****g joke’, you said. Those words, you don’t know how much they hurt me, Jared. I’ve spent years proving to the world, to him—” Joey stopped and closed his eyes for a second. When he opened them, his eyes were filled with pain. Then he blinked, and it was gone. He stood back, his expression blank.
“You know what? I don’t need to explain anything to you. You’ve already judged me and found me wanting anyway. Suit yourself. Go back to your perfect world where everything’s just the way you want it, and leave me the hell alone.” He stalked back to the house and banged the door closed behind him.
I remained where I was against the hood for a few minutes until I stood up and stumbled around to the car door, opening it to sit inside. The shock of Joey’s anger and hurt, and, yes, scathing disgust completely floored me. I never knew he had all that inside him. Better yet, I never realized that was how he saw me. Did everyone else feel that way, too?
I rubbed my eyes as I sat there, lost in thought. All Joey had ever let anyone see of himself was the brash, outlandish persona he hid behind. I didn’t know how to make it right. I sat there for hours, shivering in the seat until the sun started to set.
A knock on my window startled me. I turned to see Joey standing there, wearing a jacket this time. I rolled down the window.
“How long you gonna sit here and freeze, Jared?” he asked.
“Dunno. Hadn’t decided what to do yet. You kinda knocked me for a loop.”
“That’s a first.” He stepped back. “Well, since you’re still here, come in and use the bathroom, maybe warm up? I just finished dinner, though, so if you’re hungry, you’ll have to make something for yourself.”
“You sure it’s okay to come inside?”
Joey shrugged. “You decide.” He left me in the car and went back to the house. I scrambled out and followed.
- Writer
