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Chapter 11The next morning, I awoke feeling hung over, weak and tired, and emotionally, if not physically, exhausted. Gayle’s party had been a wakeup call for me. Something had to change in my life. What I was looking for, whatever it might be, wasn’t going to come find me. I had to go get it myself. And, as I stood in the shower with my hands behind my back, letting the warm water splash over my body, long strands of wet hair dangling around my face like a curtain, I began thinking about Gayle, thinking about how this person whom I barely knew made me feel. There was just something about her, some unknown, intangible quality I couldn’t quite define. My subconscious kept trying to regurgitate her being a lesbian, but I shook it out of my head. “I’m not a lesbian,” I replied softly. “And s