Chapter 19
Edward was still looking at his hands, although they now just rested half-open in his lap. He had stopped flexing them over and over. He seemed at peace.
But I was glad he wasn't looking at me. My heart had stopped beating for a moment, and I wasn't sure whether my face had gone bright red or ghastly pale, but either way it would be clear my feelings were stomping all over me.
"It was a relief. It was finally over. And I hadn't even realized it was an ordeal," he said. "It's all so strange."
"You don't have to process everything all at once," I said. "It's okay to take your time."
But he didn't seem to hear me. He just kept talking. He kept saying all the words that were making it hard for me to breathe.
"I thought I loved her. I was quite certain of it. I had even had fig
