Pregnant with the Bad Boy

24

I'd been up half the night, I'd cursed at Dylan's sleeping face more than once that he'd let me sleep half the day, and I heard his voice from the bathroom again.

“No, I can't, I can't.” His voice sounded annoyed as I rolled over in bed and looked at the bathroom door, what on earth was he talking about.

“you'll have to wait until I can walk properly.” I opened my eyes. Who would wait for him and why?! I suddenly felt pain, like someone had hit me hard in the chest, don't tell me he had someone else. I closed my eyes devastated, of course. this was of course too good to be true and now it had come to the surface.

“Why wasn't the money I sent two weeks ago enough?” His voice was angry now, but he tried to sound as quiet as he could, I got up on my arms where I lay, who did he send money to anyway?

“So, it's better that your children starve Marnie?!” He hissed angrily and I drew in a shocked breath. Children? Dylan had kids. Why had he never mentioned it before?! I stared angrily at the door as he muttered a sour goodbye and the door opened.

“Who the hell is Marnie Dylan, and why are you sending money to her kids?!” I was still sitting on my elbows when he looked startled, and it hurt more than I could ever imagine.

“Jennifer waits.” He was still standing in the doorway when I flung myself up from the bed and took a threatening step towards the door.

“tell me. Now. Otherwise, I'm out of here and you'll never see me again.” My words were sharp, and his eyes panicked that I was serious.

“She is my sister.” I had tensed my whole body waiting for him to say it was over, that everything we had was just a side chick and that he would laugh at me.

I stared incredulously at his explanation, and he sighed deeply and limped back to bed.

“Your sister? I thought you were an only child?” I was still standing up, unsure if I believed him as he sat back down on the bed and he drew in his breath as hard as he could before answering dully.

“I am, she's from my dad's side.” I lingered, his dad's side. Did his even know who his dad was?

“Wait a minute, you say you know who your father is?” I sat down next to him, and he nodded heavily, this wasn't easy for him.

“I do, he was a lawyer from Little Rock, Marnie was already born when they had an affair.”

I rubbed my hands uncertainly and looked silently into the wall, his story might as well be mine, only from the other side.

“Marnie needs money from you?” I sounded a little angrier now that I already disliked a woman who abused Dylan, I already wanted to strangle her even though it was his sister.

“She is useless with money and men.” His smile was sarcastic, and I nodded, it was nothing unusual unfortunately.

“Why have you never mentioned her before?” I looked accusingly at his shameful

face.

“I don't know... she's not like me, she's a free spirit just like my mother was, she does what she wants and never thinks about the consequences.” I was angry, I felt it even before he had started explaining, how could he hide such an important part of his life?

“Dylan, I can't take any more secrets... so is there anything else I need to know?” I sighed as he shook his head, why didn't I trust him to tell me the truth.

“I know I did wrong Jen, but I'm not so proud of this part of my life.” His words were harsh again, perfect, had we done anything but fight since we got together?

“You mean you don't trust me!?” I stood up again and swayed as he looked at me from the bed with a shamefaced expression.

“No, of course I trust you, on the contrary. I don't want Marnie to suck you dry like she does everyone else.” His words were pleading, and I turned my head sharply at his explanations.

I was really angry now, he had met everyone from my family, even my dad, and I didn't even get to know that he had a sister?!

“You wouldn't understand...” his voice was strained now and I closed my eyes with the frustration that was circulating inside me, the bastard.

“Then make me understand!? Are you ashamed of me?! I'm not good enough to meet your family when you've met all of mine?!” I pulled my hand through my hair in frustration and looked at the air in annoyance as his face was tense, his whole body was tense now so I could see every muscle on his worked body.

“Marnie is not my family Jen.” His words were cold and toneless. I chuckled to myself; he was so full of s**t.

“Sure, that's why you're supporting her?” I didn't expect him to stand up, but there he was, taller than me and looking like he wanted to murder someone.

“I'm helping her because I don't want her two children that she has to starve to death when she spent it all on herself.” I backed away from his anger as I had rarely seen him so angry, except for the time I had kissed the man in the bar in front of him.

“The only family I had is dead, and I'm alone.” He gasped at the anger that faded as I ventured back to his side, I had let my emotions get the better of me and let my jealousy win. Again.

“That's not true.” I took his shaking hands in mine, and he looked down at my own, I wanted to show him everything, that I was there for him and that he didn't have to hide anything he wasn't proud of.

“I will always be your family Dylan, no matter what happens.” I whispered the order as we stood with our foreheads together and he grabbed my face with his big hands and looked at me tenderly.

“Jennifer Thompson, you are absolutely fantastic.” I smiled happily as he kissed me and all the anger and confusion I felt was blown away by his love.

“I know.” He laughed at my smugness before he grimaced in pain and I helped him back into bed.

He threw himself backwards with his back and took up exactly all the space, I smiled at his silly face as he looked at me with his big grey eyes.

“Lay you ass down now.” I narrowed my eyes at his playful face as he shrugged and picked up the phone again, I sighed and walked out to the kitchen, my own phone was lying there and I looked at it, just as I thought nothing, I was beginning to think that Dylan wasn't the only one who only had me, I only had him too it seemed.

I decided to write to Mandy, she hadn't said she would renounce the blood ties because I wanted to be with Dylan.

I quickly wrote that I wondered if she could come over, I didn't want to leave Dylan any more than I had to, no matter what he said, he needed me.

I put the phone down again and opened the fridge, it echoed back to me as empty as yesterday when I had scraped up the last of the food, I would have to go out anyway.

I pulled on something Dylan had thrown off on the kitchen chair, a flannel shirt, it burned as I remembered the last time, we used it. I breathed in the scent of his wonderful fragrance that was on it and found a pair of denim shorts I had dug out the other day in my closet before I moved in here, they fit perfectly, they might not even be mine, it could probably just as easily be my younger sister who had thrown them in the wrong closet at home in the yard.

I walked towards the bedroom while pulling my hair into a short ponytail at the back and looked into the bedroom, he was asleep again with the mobile on his chest, I smiled at his sweet face, I promised myself to ask for painkillers again, I hated to see him in so much pain.

I quietly closed the door and grabbed my fringed bag and Dylan's car keys, he'd be pissed if he knew but I wasn't going to let either of us starve to death, especially when I'd promised Dylan, I'd get my act together about eating.

I took the phone with me in case he woke up and locked the door as slowly as I could in case he woke up from it being turned around.

I ran down to the car, I was already feeling stressed that he was in there alone and jumped in the car, it was only around nine o'clock so there weren't many people out now, most were already at work, and I sighed, I was going to need a job soon, I didn't want Dylan to provide for me as my savings were running out.

I knew I could just call Dad and ask for money like Mandy did but I still refused to have to rely on him even though he had changed. I quickly drove out through the now quite familiar streets and onto the exit for the motorway, I might as well go to one of the bigger department stores while I was at it.

The radio was playing some poppy song I didn't recognise, and I turned up the volume, feeling better for the moment as I turned into the huge car park and jumped out.

I locked the car with a click and walked happily through the large doors, it was mostly elderly and families with children inside as I grabbed a shopping trolley and leaned forward on it as I walked around picking in food that I was pretty sure Dylan would like, I walked slowly through the aisles as I saw her. How could I have missed her like that with the perfect blonde hair lying in waves exposed? I looked thoughtfully at my mother who never had her hair down, not even when she was sleeping. I half hid behind a shelf and stared at her clothes, they were more casual too, a simple cardigan and a pair of jeans. She smiled and laughed more than I'd seen her do in years, I was instantly happy inside, maybe if she felt better, she could talk to me, try to make her understand that I wasn't making a mistake with Dylan, that he was the one who made me feel better.

I was just about to walk up when I saw him, he was in her church, I didn't care for it as much as she did but I probably recognized the faces from there if I saw them.

So that's how it was. I watched in disgust as she touched his arm, laughing at his bad jokes, she looked like me with Dylan. It pained me that she had the right to see who she wanted but not me? My teeth gritted as I walked quickly towards the loving couple and she flinched when she saw me, I smiled dryly at her.

“Jennifer... you scared the heaven out of me!” she put her hand to her chest and her boyfriend immediately looked worried when he saw me, I immediately disliked him.

“Mom.” I said her name short and dry, damn hypocrite she was who complained about dad and here she was a few days later and had a new boyfriend.

She touched her hair and her flack glanced between me and him, I sighed and hung my body down more so my tank top went down more and made a man further away go into the the fruit section as he gawked me.

“Jennifer please!” Mom looked at my breasts, which were more visible than I had intended, as I rolled my eyes and pulled one of the buttons closed, she immediately looked more content and looked like she was shaking off what had just happened.

“Clark, this is my eldest daughter. Jennifer.” she was beaming at him and I just nodded at the loafer-clad man with a dark blue shirt that made his red look even redder, my god what did she see in this guy?

He just smiled back at me weakly, probably wondering where I went wrong in life and how we could be related at all.

“so, how's Dylan?” she sounded really worried and I got a lump in my throat, how could she stand there and be worried about him but she couldn't accept that I wanted to share my life with him?

“He is in pain.” I bit off her question, I was still embarrassed, and she must have seen it and put her hand on my arm trying I glared at her, and she quickly pulled it off again looking embarrassed. Good. I didn't want her to stand here and be happy when I wasn't allowed to be.

“Yes of course.” She looked more nervous, and I rolled my eyes at her innocent look.

“Dad helped me bring him home instead.” I knew just how to hurt her feelings and she flinched and looked at me like a deer with the big blue eyes Mandy had gotten as opposed to my green sneaky ones from Dad.

“Ed helped you get home; you mean to Dylan’s place?” she blinked like it was the first time she'd realized I was living with him now. I shrugged at her outrage, I was angry, but I didn't want to show it.

“Yep, he came when I called him.” I smiled wider at her wounded face, I knew exactly how to twist the knife in her and right now I was happy to do it.

“I didn't know you two talked.” She swallowed and looked at her boor, I stood up and caught her gaze.

I bit down on every word, and she looked like she was going to cry now, I felt guilty, but my anger was greater than my loyalty to her was at the moment.

She pulled away an invisible tear and I felt like laughing at her suffering, what did she have to complain about? She had everything she wanted nowadays, the farm, a new boyfriend who surely loved her back and me out of her perfect life.

“Just stop it mom.” I sounded surprisingly like Dylan as I said those words emotionlessly to her sad face.

“You don't talk to your mother like that, do you?” The lout talked to me, I began to understand Dylan more and more when he wanted to rivet people who disturbed his existence.

“You, shut the f**k up.” I said the words calmly and he immediately retreated insulted, mom was embarrassed, I felt amazing.

“Jennifer, I know you're mad at me, but don't take it out on Clark.” Her gaze was pleading against my own cold ones, I folded my arms. Oh, I was mad at her.

“He makes me happy; how can you stand here and live the life you want to live but not support mine?” I spat the words at her awkward face. My eyes were burning now from the threatening tears. Damn. I blinked evilly as she looked sadder than anything else.

“I never said you can't be with him...I just don't want you to throw your life away with a decision you will regret.” She tried to sound convincing as I smiled sarcastically at her plea.

“You mean like you did?” I raised my eyebrows, and she became redder in the face now and cleared her throat quickly.

“I have no regrets about your father.” I nodded, finally something I could agree with.

“I don’t have any with Dylan either.” Her eyes caught a quick glimpse of understanding, and it gave me hope for a few seconds before she shook her head at me.

“No Jennifer. I can't be a part of this, you know what I think.” I slumped my shoulders, I wasn't angry anymore, just disappointed and saddened by hen's answer.

“You know I'd marry him tomorrow if he'd let me, but he doesn't want us to fight about this.” I quickly wiped away the tears that had come as she stood silent for a while when I finally said.

“you know where to find me.” I left the cart where I had left it and ran through the store out to Dylan's car.

It felt safe, familiar and I pressed Dylan's long shirt sleeves against my face and let the tears fall out, I sounded awful and I could probably be heard from afar now as I screamed with anger at my mother, damn I hated her, she wanted to stop me from being with Dylan, I would show her everything, I would take out the birth control and get knocked up or something, then she would more or less force me to marry him, but because I loved him? No way! I swore loudly and banged the steering wheel several times so a couple of seagulls were scared by the horn.

I looked down at the phone, Dylan had called me three times, I didn't want him to hear me being sad again but knowing myself I wouldn't be able to be quiet anyway.

“Jen! Where did you go!?” His voice was worried, and I put my hand over my mouth and swallowed before answering, hoping I didn't sound too sad.

“Hey baby, I was just driving to the store while you were sleeping.” I chuckled a little as he was quiet on the other side now.

“Have you been crying?” Damn, of course he had heard it, he had seen it most in the world. I sighed and tilted my head back.

“Yeah… I ran into my mom; she has some new boyfriend.” I didn't want to tell him that I had more or less begged Mom to accept us as he sighed himself on his end of the conversation.

“well well, not as innocent as you think.” He would have laughed if he heard that I was in no mood to laugh.

“Apparently not, some geek named Clark.” I angrily muttered his name to Dylan's understanding voice.

“Come home now babe, just drive my truck carefully.” His words were extra soft on the word truck. I smiled faintly at his concern.

“I'm on my way now...but I didn't get anything...” I'd been so stupid and left everything in the shop and I wasn't going to go back in.

“f**k it, we'll sort it out later.” I nodded; he was right. As usual.

“See you soon, I love you.” I started to drive out when I heard him smiling on the other side.

“Yeah babe, love you too.” I hung up and drove out of the condemned parking lot, I didn't see mom's car, so that must mean she drove here with Clark. I mimed his name childishly a couple of times and pulled the radio on loud, I didn't want to hear my own thoughts right now and I must have heard from miles away as I finally pulled into the parking lot at Dylan's apartment.

I actually jumped out of the car, something I would never have dared to do a while ago, but that was the thing, Dylan made me feel free, myself. And no one else seemed to understand how much he made me breathe again.

I ran up the stairs, I was still angry but the thought of Dylan's embrace had already calmed me down as I unlocked the door and went straight into the bedroom where he looked up half asleep. I stopped and looked at him for two seconds, he was so fed up with this already and I couldn't do anything about it I quickly lay down beside him.

He smiled at my sulky face, and I looked up sadly at his handsome face, he really was so handsome.

I grabbed his arm and put it around me, he didn't protest but just pulled me closer, damn mom, if she could only see how happy he made me.

“What happened? With your mom?” His chin was on my head now and I sighed, I still didn't know if I wanted to tell her that she was still against us.

“I just saw her and walked up, she had that Clark with her and they were standing there laughing like nothing had happened.” I twisted my hands tightly into clenched fists as his Adam's apple moved against my forehead.

“Are you sad? Because your parents are getting divorced?” His voice was so wonderful and understanding and it occurred to me that maybe I was sad about it, I hadn't thought about it much because Dad had been away for the last few years and Mum never said anything about them not being together anymore really, but now that they were getting divorced, it felt awful because then it was true that they no longer loved each other.

 “Yes.” I drilled into his neck more, I had started to touch the cross he had given me again, something I had started to do when I was worried.

“It's okay, I understand.” He squirmed and I felt him clench his jaw in pain again, I put my hand on his shoulder comfortingly.

“I wanted to make her understand that you are the best thing that happened to me... but...” I stopped and he didn't draw a deep sigh now and I looked up at his face, he was staring straight into the road, his features were so perfect, but his face was sad as I caught his gaze finally.

“She still doesn't want us to get married.” His voice was tired, and I nodded, she had almost understood, part of her did but that part was buried by all the sadness she felt at being let down.

“I want to do it anyway Dylan.” he turned his whole face down at me now and smiled broadly at my devotion to him.

“I know babe, me too.” My heart raced as he noticed my face went all ecstatic that he had agreed to it.

“But I still think you should make up with your family.” My mood sank, of course. I muttered sourly as he laughed and hugged me tightly.

“I don't give a damn about judgment.” I was angry now, at him too, when he laughed again.

“No, you don't, I've seen you with them and I don't want you to have to choose between them or me, we have plenty of time babe.” He pulled my hair out of my face, and I lay back down defeated.

“Why did you ask me so early if you knew we would have to wait anyway?” I sounded bitter and he drew his hand on my arm down to my fingers, stopping at my ring finger.

“Because I was sorry, and I didn't want you to leave me.” I almost coughed, so it had just been a plan to keep me from leaving him.

 “Dylan, do you regret? That you asked me?” My voice was trembling now, if he said yes, I would die, here and now.

“No, I don't, I just wish it had been under better circumstances.” His voice was warm, and I calmed down, I didn't want to be let down by one more person I trusted in my life.

I looked at him incredulously as he grabbed my ring finger and held it firmly in his barren fingers.

“I want to do it right, okay, no panic about us leaving each other, just you and me and a ring on your beautiful finger.” I had stopped completely, it felt like my insides were getting cold from the heat pressing against my lungs and making it hard to take regular breaths as I realized that was what I wanted too.

“Am I terrible if it sounds exactly the way I want it to sound?” I looked up shamefacedly at his eyes, shining with understanding as he laughed at my confession.

“Not really Jennifer, you're a girl, and I'm starting to understand how you work.” I didn't know whether to be offended or grateful that he understood as he smiled wider when I kissed his neck lightly.

“Never stop being so perfect.” I laughed until I had tears in my eyes, but they were good tears.

“can't, that's just how I am. He flexed his arms and I slapped him playfully on his flat stomach.

“Come on tough guy, if you want something to eat you have to let me go.” I pulled myself up as he playfully pulled me back down.

“I survive, I have to live on air and love.” I laughed out loud as he finally let me go and I looked back at his smiling face, amazing man.

“I'll be right back; I'm just going out for a quick walk.” He waved at me as I laughed and walked out the door for the second time today, this time I was determined to get food home this time.

I ran down the stairs, Dylan hadn't said anything about me not driving so I jumped in and started the big truck, maybe he'd given up after I'd driven it without permission several times now.

I drove back to the supermarket; my mom couldn't stay any longer and I couldn't face going anywhere else.

I quickly went back to where I had left the trolley, it was still there when I snatched it and walked towards the cash registers.

The queue was endless as an old lady argued with the young cashier about change, I didn't listen but looked around again, maybe you could work here? It seemed quiet, and the odd grumpy lady I could handle.

Maybe? I looked around as it was suddenly my turn and I quickly put up my goods, the girl at the counter barely looked at me, I was grateful that no one had recognised me after my outburst.

I quickly paid and grabbed my bags, feeling stressed knowing that Dylan was awake and probably super hungry by now, I really hoped he hadn't gone up to the kitchen himself.

I half jumped out into the car park and threw the goods into the passenger seat, it was hot out now and I was sweating in my Dylan shirt, I quickly pulled it off, if people wanted to stare at me, they could as I drove out of the car park for the second time today.

There were more people out now, it was lunchtime already and I turned on the AC, it was nothing I had worn in my old mansion car as it blew my hair freshly back.

“Hey, baby, nice t**s!” I had stopped at the red light and a sports car pulled up beside me, I glanced down at the two middle aged men and looked ahead, what idiots.

“Hey, don't be like that, you can answer when you get a compliment?” His friend had caught on when I turned towards them and smiled with my middle finger at their faces.

“f*****g b***h, someone should teach her some manors.” They laughed as I had turned forward again, I felt I was pissed off now, disgusting bastards who should shut up.

“I know exactly how...” they laughed again, and I gritted my teeth, when the reds turned, I pressed down on the gas and left the bastards behind, they were lucky I didn't want to ruin Dylan's car more than I already had, otherwise I would have run into those bastards.

I was angry when I got out and snatched the bags, if I saw those bastards again I would ... I stopped completely in my anger when I saw a white Mercedes parked further away.

Mom.