Book 1 Interviewing For Her Lover
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CHAPTER 1: SARAH––––––––
“Do I have to take off my clothes?” Sarah tugged on the hem of her black dress. It was shorter and lower cut in the front than she normally wore, but the Viewing was about finding a man for s*x and according to Ethan men liked to look.
“No.” Ethan turned her away from the door and forced her to look at him. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.”
She stared into his blue eyes. Why couldn’t he be interested in her? She’d only met with him five or six times, but she trusted him. He ran his business, La Petite Mort Club, very professionally and he was gorgeous with his sandy brown hair, strong cheekbones and vibrant blue eyes. s*x between them would be good. Easy. He was attractive and...not for her. She didn’t want decent s*x or good s*x, she wanted mind blowing, screaming orgasms and that wouldn’t happen between him and her because there was no chemistry, no attraction.
“Listen to me.” He moved his hands to her shoulders and gave her a gentle shake. “You aren’t selling yourself to the highest bidder. You’re looking for a partner. One who’ll”—he grinned—“turn you on in ways you can’t even imagine.”
She glanced at the door where the men waited. Waited for her. Waited to decide if they wanted to f**k her. “I’m a bit nervous.”
“About what?”
This was embarrassing but she’d been honest with him up to this point. She’d had to be. He was helping her...had helped her to choose the five men in the other room. “What if none of them...”
“They will want you.” He touched her chin, turning her face toward him. “A few of them may back out after this but not because they don’t want you.”
“Yeah, right.”
“I’m only going to say this once. You’re beautiful and different, unique.”
“That’s not necessarily a good thing.” She had long legs and a nice body—trim and firm—but with her auburn hair and green eyes she was cute at best, not gorgeous. The men she’d chosen were all rich, good looking and powerful. They could have anyone they wanted.
“It’s exactly what they want, or most of them anyway.” He took her hand and led her closer to the door.
She leaned on his arm, hating these shoes. She should’ve stuck with her flats but Ethan had given her a list of what she should wear and high heels were on the top. She’d found the smallest heels in the store and by Ethan’s look when he’d first seen her she might’ve been better off going barefoot. He’d met her at the private entrance and his gaze had been appreciating as it’d skimmed over her dress, until he got to her feet. Then he’d frowned and shook his head.
“Finding the right men for you wasn’t easy.” He stopped at the door.
“Thanks a lot.” She shifted away from him, his words hurting a little. She hadn’t been sure of her appeal to the opposite s*x in a long time, not since the early years with Adam.
“It’s not because you aren’t beautiful but because you want to be dominated and you want to dominate—”
“I do not want to dominate.” All she could picture was a woman in black leather with a whip and that wasn’t her, not at all.
“If you say so.” He smiled a little. “But, you do want to lead the scene. Right? Because that’s what—”
“Yes.” Her face was red. She could feel it. She didn’t want to talk about her fantasies again. It’d been embarrassing enough the first time, but he’d had to know what she wanted to compile a list of candidates.
“Most at the club are either doms or subs. Very few are switches.” His eyes raked over her. “That’s what’s so special about you. You want it all and...that’s what made choosing these men difficult.”
He’d given her a selection of twenty-two men who might be interested in what she wanted. She’d narrowed it down to seven. Two had been uninterested when he’d approached. That’d left her with the five who’d see her in person for the first time tonight, but she wouldn’t see them. That’d come after the Viewing when she interviewed any who were still interested.
“Remember what you want. This is your deal. You call the shots. At least a little.” He kissed her forehead. “But don’t refuse to give them anything. You don’t want a submissive.”
“No.” That didn’t turn her on at all and she only had eight weeks. One night each week for two months before she’d go back to her lonely life, her lonely bed, dreaming of Adam.
“You can do this.” He pulled a flask from his jacket and unscrewed the lid. “For courage.”
“Thanks.” She took a large swallow, the brandy too thick and sweet for her taste but it was better than nothing.
“Now, go find your lover.”
She laughed a little but sadness swept through her. There’d be no love between this man and herself. This would be s*x, f*****g. That’s all. The only man she’d ever love, her only lover, was dead. This was purely physical. “Thank you again.” She stood on tip-toe and kissed his cheek. He may be gorgeous and run a s*x club but he was a good man, a good friend.
She turned and opened the door and walked into the room, trying to stay balanced on these stupid heels. Men wouldn’t find them so attractive if they had to wear them. The room was dark except for one light highlighting a small platform. That was for her. She stepped up onto the small stage. The room was silent but they were there, above her, hidden behind the one-way mirrors, watching her and deciding if they wanted to take the next step—to eventually take her.
She stared into the blackness of the room. It wasn’t huge but its emptiness made it seem vast. She glanced upward, the light making her squint and she quickly stared back into the darkness. This was arranged for them to see her. That was it. She’d get no glimpse of them yet. She’d seen their pictures, chosen them but meeting them in person would be different. A picture couldn’t tell her their smell or the sound of their voices.
She tugged at her dress where it hugged her hips, wishing the questions would start, but there was only silence. She shifted, the heels already killing her feet. Ethan hadn’t liked them and if they weren’t going to impress, she might as well take them off. She moved to the back of the stage, leaned against the wall and removed her shoes. As she returned to the center of the stage a man spoke, his voice loud and commanding almost echoing throughout the room.
“Don’t stop there. Take off your dress.”
She bent, placing her shoes on the floor. That wasn’t part of the deal. She wasn’t going to undress in front of five men, only one. Only the one she chose. She straightened. “No.”
“What?” He was surprised and not happy.
“I said no. That’s not part of the Viewing.”
“I want to see what I’m getting.”
She stared up toward the windows, squinting a little. She couldn’t tell from where the voice had come. The speaker system made it sound as if it were coming from God himself. “And you will if I pick you.”
Another man laughed.
“It’s not funny. She’s disobedient,” said the man with the loud voice.
“Not always. I can be obedient.” These men liked to be in control but sometimes, so did she.
“Will you raise your dress? Just a little,” asked another voice.
“Didn’t you see enough in the photos?” She’d applied a few months ago for this one-time contract. She’d been excited and nervous when she’d received the acceptance email with an appointment for a photography session. She’d never had her picture professionally taken, since she didn’t count school portraits or the ones her parents had had done at JCPenny’s. She’d been anxious and a little turned on imaging wearing her new lingerie in front of a strange man, so she’d been disappointed to find the photographer was an elderly woman, but the lady had put her at ease and the photos had turned out better than she’d expected. She glanced up at the mirrors, hoping she wasn’t disappointing all the men. That’d be too embarrassing.
“Those were...nice, but I’d like to see the real thing before deciding if you’re worth my time.”
She raised a brow. “You can always leave.” She shouldn’t antagonize him. She was sure the bossy man had already decided against committing to this agreement. Disobedience didn’t appeal to him. That left four. If she didn’t pick any of them, she could go through the process again, but she didn’t think she would.
The man chuckled slightly. “I know that, but I haven’t decided I don’t want to f**k you. Not yet, anyway.”
The word, so harsh and vulgar excited her. It was the truth. That was what she, what they were all deciding. Who’d get to f**k her. It was what she wanted, what she’d agreed to do, and as much as she dreaded it, she wanted it. She was tired of being alone. She missed having a man inside her—his tongue and fingers and c**k.
“Do any of you have any questions?” She clasped her dress at her waist and slowly gathered it upward, displaying more and more of her long legs. She ran. They were in shape. The men would like them.
“Lower your top,” said the same man who’d told her to take off her dress.
She didn’t like him. If he didn’t back out, she’d have Ethan remove him from her list. He was too commanding. He’d never allow her to be in control.
“I don’t know if he’s done looking at my legs yet.” She continued raising the dress until her black and green lace panties were almost exposed.
“Very nice and thank you,” said the polite man.
“You’re welcome.” This man might work. She shifted the dress up another inch before dropping it, giving them a glance at her panties.
“Now, your top,” said the bossy guy.
She lowered her spaghetti string off one shoulder, letting the dress dip, but not enough to show anything besides the side of her b*a.
“More,” he said.
“No.” She raised the strap, covering herself. She didn’t like this man and wished he’d leave. She’d kick him out but that wasn’t part of the process and they were very firm about their rules at this club.
“He got to see your p***y. Why don’t I get to see your t**s?”
“You got to see as much as he did.” She was ready to move on. She bent and picked up her shoes. “If there’s nothing else, gentleman, we can set up times for the interview process.”
“Turn around,” said another man.
It was a command, but she didn’t mind. There was a politeness to his order and something about the texture of his voice caused an ache between her thighs. There was a caress in his tone but with an edge and a promise of a good hard f**k.
“Are you going to obey?” His words were whisper soft and smooth.
“Yes.” That was going to be part of this too. Her commanding and him commanding. She dropped her shoes and turned.
“Raise you dress again.”
She looked over her shoulder at where she imagined he sat watching her.
“Please.” There was humor in his tone.
She smiled and slowly gathered the dress upward. She stopped right below the curve of her bottom.
“More. Please.” There was a little less humor in his voice.
She wanted to show him her a*s. She wanted to show that voice everything but not with the others around. This would be just her and one man, one stranger. That was one of her rules. “No. Only if you’re picked do you get to see any more of me than you have.” She dropped her dress, grabbed her shoes and walked off the stage and out the door.
She was going to have s*x with a stranger. She was going to live out her fantasies for eight nights with a man she didn’t know and would never really know, but she wasn’t going to lose who she was. She’d keep her honor and her dignity which meant she had to pick a man who’d agree with her rules.