You Will Be Mine (New Horizon Book 3)

Chapter 14: Gabe

I’m elbow-deep in spreadsheets and paperwork when I get a mind-link from my younger sister Stella demanding to know whether I told Jeannie that she’s my mate, and why not. It was only what, like a half hour ago that I left Jeannie with her chickens? How are we here already?

I was kind of hoping that after the day I had yesterday with so many people challenging me about the same thing, and the I don’t even know how many times that I’ve been called an i***t, that word would just make its way around the family and people would leave me alone about it. It’s my life, my relationship, my decision. Quite honestly, all this instant backlash is kind of having the opposite effect of what they intend anyway, pushing me to double down on keeping my secret instead of confessing the truth.

Yeah, okay, I can’t articulate a coherent response to the question of why I’m so insistent on keeping this secret, but that’s exactly why I need everyone to get off my back about it. I need more time to think. Once the secret’s out, it’s out, and there’s no taking it back. Whatever happens because of it, happens, and then my only option will be damage control.

I even tried pointing out to my parents that it’s not typical for a werewolf pursuing a non-werewolf mate to reveal that right away. Even my mom didn’t tell her mates right after meeting them.

“True, but my mates had no idea about werewolves, and they had no idea about mates. Once they did, I told them almost immediately after,” she insisted, trying to illustrate exactly how big of an i***t she thinks I am. “Jeannie already knows the big secrets, and she’s been receptive to it all. It’s time to tell her.”

But even though she was so adamant about my decision being the wrong one, she also agreed to keep my secret. Although, apparently, that promise didn’t include telling my younger siblings to back off about it. It kind of seems like she didn’t tell them anything at all. I can only assume she was hoping that one of them would blurt it out without realizing.

Clever, but I’m about to take care of that.

I haven’t told her, and I’m not going to tell her until I feel like it’s the right time. Me, not you. I’m also not going to defend my reasons, I answer Stella, hoping that puts an end to her involvement in it.

Then I send a mind-link to Aaron telling him much the same thing. He’s at school, and so is Gideon, so I also tell him to inform our youngest brother, who is only 15 and just shy of being able to use mind-links.

With my loose ends tied up, I turn my attention back to the tasks before me, glancing up to see Garrett shaking his head at me like I’m being ridiculous.

“Okay, listen. I need someone to understand where I’m coming from, and I pick you,” I declare, frustrated. “How many women have ever been interested in me because of who I am inside, like my personality and stuff?”

He shrugs, smirking at me over the top of his computer monitor.

“None, that’s how many. Every woman who has ever been interested has been interested in my last name, in the fact that I’ll probably be the next Alpha, in my connection to our current Alpha, and every other possible wrong reason. My looks, my body, but never me. Never just who I am.”

“But Jeannie’s your mate and that’s a pretty good reason,” Garrett reminds me, thinking he has made a good argument. But he hasn’t. All he’s done is identify the problem.

“Exactly,” I agree with what he said, but not what he meant by it. “She’s my mate, and if I told her that, it would be all the reason she has to be interested in me. I saw it yesterday when we were telling her about mates. She likes the idea of having a mate so much that it would probably influence her opinion of me if she knew she was mine.”

“And that’s a bad thing? Because from where I’m sitting, you’ve kind of been struggling to get close to her.”

“Exactly,” I commend his identification of the rest of the problem. “She doesn’t like me yet. I think she’s starting to, but she’s still pretty uncertain about it. I think if I pretended that there was some way that Simon and I could be separated and asked if she’d be interested in that, she’d say yes. She wants him, but not me. And I’m sorry, but I’m not about to tell her something that will superficially sway her opinion. I have a feeling that when I tell her, the immediate look on her face will be fear or disappointment, and then once she thinks about it, she’ll be all smiles because she has a mate, not because she has me.”

“Oh damn,” Garrett exclaims, and I think it just clicked for him based on the look on his face. “That actually makes sense, considering the experiences you’ve had with women. Because to me, the idea of someone being swayed because they understand exactly how valuable a fated mate is doesn’t bother me. It’s the fact that sometimes it doesn’t even matter, that even though they know that they can still deny the connection. But I get it that you’re coming at this from the other side of that same coin. Even our best friend came at you for all the wrong reasons.”

“Exactly,” I say yet again, fighting back tears for some reason I don’t even fully understand.

Letting out some of the feelings and racing thoughts in my head has turned out to be more intense than I anticipated, but I’m glad that my brother and closest friend finally seems to understand. I can handle all the backlash as long as he has my back.

Jeannie’s scent is suddenly getting pretty strong, and I can’t help the hopeful, excited puppy dog inside me from wanting it to mean that she’s coming to see me because she can’t stand spending even a half hour away from me. I know that’s highly unlikely, but I can dream.

“Damn,” I hear Stella say from out in the hall, and I crane my neck to try to get a better view of whatever is going on out there.

It sounds like she wanted to bug our mom for her credit card to go shopping, but Mom is out making rounds at the moment. Normally I’d just point and laugh at her imaginary problem that comes from being too lazy to get a job to support her own shopping habits, but this time she has Jeannie with her.

I’m guessing she brought her because she knows that our parents are more likely to spoil the sweet, innocent, deprived farm girl than the overgrown child that is my youngest sister, but what I bet she doesn’t see coming is the fact that bringing the farm girl along also means that her oldest brother is suddenly interested in contributing to her cause.

“Do I detect a shopaholic in distress?” I call out to them, fighting the urge to laugh when I see both of their heads turn in unison, the same expression of surprise on their faces as they gape at me.

Stella thinks I’m just screwing with her until I pull out my credit card and dangle it in her view. That changes her attitude in a flash.

To my dismay, Jeannie only comes as far as the doorway, and it’s Stella who comes in and gets affectionate with me. But of course she does. She’s sucking up because she wants my money, speaking of women interested in me for the wrong reasons.

I’m pretty used to that one too, though I’m usually stingy about it. Jeannie, though, I can’t see her ever even asking for herself, which is exactly why I’m about to hand my credit card over to the last person I would usually trust with it. As long as she spends a fair amount on Jeannie too, I’m more than happy to do it.

After they’ve left, Garrett shoots me an incredulous look, shaking his head at me again.

“What now?” I demand. This is getting ridiculous.

“I get where you’re coming from with this whole keeping the fact that you’re mates from your mate thing. I really do,” he says, exhaling a long breath before continuing. “But do you really think that your first move to get her to like you for you should involve flashing your bank account around?”

Damn it, he’s right. Part of me wants to run down my sister and take my credit card back, but I know it’s already too late.

“And not only that, but I don’t think she wanted your money. I think your whole ploy to ‘spoil’ her by linking Stella’s expense account to hers made her incredibly uncomfortable,” he points out.

I replay the whole scene in my mind, remembering how Jeannie was blushing and glancing away most of the time. It seemed like her normal awkwardness to me, and I don’t know that it’s going to be productive for me to sit here and fret about whether it was actually her cursing me and feeling uncomfortable without even saying a word.

“I just wanted her to have some nice stuff, to spoil herself for once,” I attempt to defend myself. “I know she won’t ever ask for the things she wants, and even if I offered her my credit card like I did Stella, she wouldn’t take it. Or if she took it, she wouldn’t use it.”

“Because it makes her uncomfortable,” Garrett maintains. “She doesn’t want your money, and that’s a good thing.”

“Maybe, but she also doesn’t really have anything. She has chickens. That’s about it. I’ve been in her room, and there’s next to nothing in it. Her closet is bare and empty. She doesn’t even have a phone!”

“Maybe all she wants is chickens.”

I can’t even argue with him. This is so hard, and I only hope that I can somehow find the strength to give myself a real chance to win Jeannie over without falling back on the fact that we’re mates. Because at the moment, it’s tempting to throw my hands up and say screw it. I obviously don’t even know how to break my old habits. I have no idea how to let her in so she can get to know the real me without relying on the usual ways to impress a woman.

“Look, I’ll help you,” Garrett promises, sensing my distress. “Next time, run it by me first before you open your big mouth.”

“You make me sound hopeless and pathetic,” I complain, grimacing and shaking my head at myself.

“If the shoe fits.”

I throw my pencil at him, but I also know he’s not wrong. I really am that hopeless and desperate, and I’m probably going to completely screw this up before it’s all over, if I haven’t already.