Once and once again -- The scarred prince's human mate

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Valentina

That’s a palace, all right. Noemi and I are given a pretty room with two huge beds and sheets I’m sure no one has ever slept in. Pulling the white linen tight, I round mine. It’s a compulsion. One of my former foster Dads was in the army, and he insisted we made our beds like this every day.

‘You have to be able to bounce a quarter off them.’ I loved Winfried. He was the one who fostered me, as well as my growing interest in engineering and everything ‘cars.’ So in a way, he’s the reason I’m here right now. If not for him, I would have never gotten so good at repairing cars or learned how to focus in school and use the intellectual abilities I was naturally given. I would never have graduated early or taken that part-time job at the garage. If it wasn’t for that job, I would have never had the money to apply for this scholarship and pay the fees for the visa, translations of all my documents, etc. If it weren’t for Winfried, I would have never chosen UM. Or to come to Baltimore. If it weren’t for me graduating early, thanks to what he instilled in me, I wouldn’t have had to move in with a family in the area because I was still underage. I would have been well over eighteen and just moved into the dorms.

Would have… Would have and could have, and should have.

Shaking my head, I try to think of something else. Niki. I look over at the clock on the wall. It’s late enough that he should be back from work or at least able to take a break and eventually pick up or call me back. He must be worried sick. Even as a small kid, he was eight going on 80. He always had my back and was, at the ripe age of 14, the reasonable adult in my life, as sad as that sounds.

I swallow some air before turning to the door when I hear a knock.

“One second.” I move over there quickly, and when I pull it open, I see the Queen and Greer standing in front of me.

“Hey.” Queen Maeve smiles at me warmly, and I see Greer’s eyes dart around the room over my shoulder.

“Are you looking for something?” Maybe my tone is too snide, but I can’t take it back now.

“No.” His voice is so calm it almost bugs me that he isn’t offended by my remark.

“We just wanted to see if the two of you need some help.”

“Oh.” I don’t know what to reply to that because, for a while now, no one ever wanted to help me.

“I… don’t need any, but let me check with Noemi.”

My friend has been in the bathroom for a while, even though the shower stopped running some time ago. Sh*t! How could I not have noticed?!

I feel my eyes go wide and speed over to the bathroom door.

“Noe? I heard the shower turn off…. Are you all right?”

“I—-Yeah. I—

She breaks off, and I feel like something heavy is dropped inside me, pulling my intestines after it. Greer has stepped up beside me, and I see something I can’t quite place in his eyes. The other thing is worry. Then his eyes turn almost amber, his pupils now look like mere slits. I suppress a shriek. What the hell?!

The lock clicks and Noemi steps out, carefully pushing the door open, the steam following her into the room. She stiffens when she sees it’s not only me in our room.

“Are you all right?” I can hear the worry in my voice, but I can’t focus enough to push it out. I don’t have to pretend. Maybe it’s even better that they know I am worried about her right off the bet.

Because I care for her, would do whatever is necessary to protect her. That’s my role here. Finally, I can be useful as something other than a mattress, f**ktoy, or punching bag, and I cling to that as hard as I can. So I pin my gaze on the Queen and Greer when Noemi’s eyes jump from one to the other, screaming: ‘WHY ARE THEY HERE?! No idea, my friend.No idea.

I see her swallow and look at her bare feet. “I-I’m good.”, she whispers.

“I—My hair is… I think I need help.” Lifting her ‘braid,’ then dropping her hand and fisting the dark blue cotton of the pants. She looks so lost that the urge to go over there and hug her is all-consuming. But before I can move, the Queen speaks up, her voice warm.

“No problem, love. Not to toot my own horn, but I'm somewhat of an expert at this. You don't wanna know how much gum and… other things I had to get out of hair in my day.”

Greer’s Mom gives him a jab to the ribs. “I have six of those. None of them are bald, and I take full credit for this.”

And Noemi smiles at that. Almost. But that’s as good as it gets with her. Greer’s face breaks into a genuinely happy smile, and I can’t shake the feeling that I’m missing something. Not in a bad way, just… something important that’s in the air, floating near my head, but I can’t quite grasp it.

Pulling a little on the hem of the shirt I’m wearing now, I lower my head to sniff the collar. Smells like heaven: laundry detergent, resin, and a hint of black pepper. For some reason, the scent seems to calm me down a little. The base level of alertness drops, like my brain switches into ‘gonna be all right, someone is watching over us’- mode. And it’s hard to get it out of that again.

'I could use the calm now, though. Breathe. Your friend is fine and in good hands. Make that phone call. Now or never.'

So I turn back to the three of them.

“Noe.."

I look solely at Noemi, my hands clenching around a phone Jade gave me about an hour ago.

"I... I didn't want to leave you alone earlier but... do you think I could-- Can make that call now?"

“No..g-go make your call. I’ll be fine.”

I eye her for a long time and watch her struggle to put on a brave expression, failing miserably.

Which only makes me snort. “Nice try… but if you say so…”

Uncertainty pulses through me, and when I turn over to look at Greer in the corner, I feel the muscles in my face spasm. If I leave her here with him, I must ensure she’s safe. Taking a few steps toward him, I ignore his mother and stare directly at him, tilting my chin up.

“If you try anything, surfer boy, I will cut your gonads off and feat them to the animals you love so much. What?” I raise an eyebrow when his eyes widen.“You have cat hair on you and there is something that looks like bird mites all over your sweater.”

When even his mother stares now, a smirk tugging on her lips, I feel my cheeks heat up for the first time in forever. I’m not the blushing type. I do that to others with my big trap and unruly attitude— great way to cover insecurities or feelings of inadequacy. You should try it.

“I notice things.”, I mumble before ducking out of the room and finding the quietest corridor I can. Steeling breath. Wooozzzaaa. Why are my fingers shaking? Oh god...

I dial the number that I’ve known by heart since I was 13. Because that’s how long my brother has had it. He never changes it. Pays the extra every time he gets a new phone or SIM to keep the number.

The tooting noise indicating that the phone is ringing goes on for an agonizing 40 seconds, and every one of those hoots makes my heart rate speed up...before the line finally clicks when the call is picked up.

“Hello?”, a sleepy female voice sounds.

“Hello…?” I hate that I sound so timid, but I have no idea who the hell that is. Not my brother, that’s for sure.

“W-Who is this? And why the hell are you calling right now? I just got off the night shift and need some f**king sleep, so make it quick, Cazzo di merda.”

“G-Gianna?”

“Yes! F**k, you called me. Shouldn’t you know—

“It’s me. Val.”

There is a sharp intake of breath, and then my big brother’s former roommate lets a few (OK, more like a good 2 minutes' worth of) curses rip in both German and Italian, which cause a commotion in the background that sounds like someone chasing her around screaming at her in a mix of the both for her foul language.

“F**K, Val, we all thought—“Gianna tries to catch her breath and then continues quieter. “We all thought you were dead.” Cold fear grips my heart, and I can’t move a muscle. I feel like someone took one of those numbing ice sprays to my insides.

“Why do you have Niki’s phone?”, I whisper. I need my big brother. I’m closer to tears than I have been in a long time. The last I remember crying was two years ago out of rage, right when I got kidnapped. But right now, all the tension, exhaustion, and just this feeling of loneliness and being overwhelmed and scared builds up and strangles my tear ducts. Please, I just need to hear his voice for one second.

“Val…”

“Where is my brother?” Not sure she hears me. “He would never change his number or give his phone to you. Not when I could be calling. So where is he?”

“Val, I-I don’t think I’m the right—-

“WHERE THE F**K IS, NIKOLAI?!” My blood roars in my ears almost loud enough so I don’t hear myself shouting at her.

She takes too long to answer. Too long for the next thing she will say to be something like: ‘Oh, he’s on vacation and just left his phone with me because data roaming is too expensive in Greece.’

“He’s gone, Val.”

And I can’t grasp it. Those three words make no sense at all. Where would Niki go without me? He would never leave me. Never! My heart squeezes tightly, and I feel my fingers going numb, my legs giving out as I slide down the wall to the ground.