Freeing Katie

Ch. 16 Explanations and Hookey

KATIE POV

“Remember how you used to be taller than me?”

“Yes!” I laugh out.  “Man, you shot up since we were 14.”  We’ve been sitting out here for a while playing catch up.  Jeremy, or J.R., was the last person I ever expected to see here.  And the fact that Chase just so happens to be his best friend is really crazy! 

After I got back from the bathroom with Taylor, Chase was no where to be seen.  After a touch of disappointment, I decided to have fun with the girls.  We danced then toured around the house- watched and cheered a few rounds of Ultimate Beer Pong. 

When Nate came over, we lost Brenna attention.  Those two have been getting closer with their relationship and I can tell Brenna is falling hard.  Nate seems to have the same problem as well. 

Taylor and I went to get some drinks, and that’s where we bumped into J.R. again.  Taylor was hitting it up with a guy from J.R.’s private school, so we left to get out of the loud house to hear each other.  It’s different talking with someone that’s been through the same experience as you- treatment wise- and it’s a bond only few can relate to.  He was the only friend I made in treatment, and I hated that we never kept in touch.

He wraps an arm around my shoulder.  “You doing alright though… with everything?”

I let out a hard sigh.  “Yeah.  Believe it or not, I’m actually doing really well.  This whole year… the move… has been the best form of healing.”

“Yea, probably helps that you have the hots for my best friend.”

Instead of denying it, I lean back with a smile on my face, fully aware of the blush that rising.  J.R. knows more about me than most people, so telling the truth comes naturally, since I know he won’t judge.  “He does make me happy.  I just wis-“

The door opens behind us.  “Hey guys, I’m headed out,” Chase says in a monotone voice.

“So soon?” J.R. asks while I frown.  We both stand up and I take a step towards him, but he already steps back with a hand on the door.

“You can get a ride back with Nate, right Katie?”

He’s barely looking at me in the eye.  “Yea, I guess.  Are you okay?”  I lean in to touch his arm but he shrugs out of my reach, and I feel a sense of rejection.

“Yea, I’m good.  Later guys.”  He throws up a wave and turns around without sparring us a glance.  I’m so confused on his bad mood. 

I hear J.R. curse under his breath.  When I turn to face him, he shakes his head.  “I’m gonna go after him and make sure he hasn’t had anything to drink.  I’ll be right back.”

I nod and rub my hands over my arms, suddenly feeling the chill in the night air.  What could have happened?

*

*

Six days. 

That’s how long it’s been since Chase decided to ghost me.

He doesn’t talk to me except for a head nod or a simple hi.  Doesn’t respond to my texts, and has skipped school twice this week, and I have half a brain to think it’s because we have a class together.  When he did show up, he was late enough so we couldn’t talk beforehand, and was always the first one out.

He completely iced me out and it hurt…. mainly because I don’t have a reason why.

Our friends have noticed it as well, and they say he’s been acting off with them too.  But at least he actually talks to them.  The first few days, I just felt rejected and sad, but then all that turned into annoyance and anger.  After he ignored me in class today, I was fed up, and decided not to waste my energy on him- no matter how much it sucked.

Mom wanted Jason and I to decorate the house for her this weekend, so we went to the store together after school.  Between classes and friends, we hardly hang out like we did at the first of the year, so it’ll be nice to play catch up while being in the fresh air. 

“Put your jacket on!” I yell from downstairs while putting my shoes on.

“I don’t need one!”  I look up as he pokes his head out.  “I’m wearing long sleeves!”

I roll my eyes.  “Fine, whatever.  I’m going to get the ladder out.  Bring the bags out.”

“K!”

As I set up the ladder for the orange lights, Jason starts untangling the fake webbing and wrapping it around the bushes.  I’m glad the previous owner already has hooks set up.  I look around and take a glance at Chase’s car.  Really wish he would get his head out of his ass… at least then he could help out.  I hate climbing on ladders.

“You still going trick or treating this year?” I ask, climbing with the lights wrapped around my hand.  “We could have looked for costumes while we were at the store.”

“I can’t decide want I want to be.  I think I want to be IT.”  I look down and see him actually step into the bush to wrap it all the way around and I smile out.

“That would be cool.”  I let the lights dangle as I put a loop around the first hook.  “Or you could be Jason Voorhees, you know, Friday the 13th ?… at least he has a weapon, and you share the same name.”

“That’s true.”  I can tell he’s actually thinking about it.   I get to the point where I should move the ladder, but I’m lazy and stretch over as far as I can to make this last loop.  Right when I get my hand to that point, my brother yells out “Chase!  What should I be for Halloween?!”

I turn my head too fast, causing my balance to titter, and I yell out an embarrassing squeal as I fall down… right into a bush. 

“Katie!”

It was only from the fourth step, but damn that hurt!  Just as I slowly start to peel myself out, strong hangs grab under my arms and haul me out.  “s**t, you’re bleeding!  Jason, go get the first aid!”

I stumble as Chase gets me out of the bushes and as soon as I can stand on my own, I push his hands away, noting the stinging from the cuts on my hands.  I take a step over the supplies, still slightly off kilter, ‘cause, you know, body pain is a real thing right now, and Chase comes over to help.  I jerk out of his hold again.  “Don’t bother,” I snip out.

“Katie..”

“No! Don’t Katie me, Chase!  I have done nothing to you, and you’ve been acting like a jerk!  Just leave me alone!”  I don’t even bother looking back at him.  Just as I hit the porch, Jason is rushing with the kit and I take it from his hands.  “Sorry, Jase, we can finish tomorrow.  Can you pick up everything, please?”  I barely hear his confused yeah as I head upstairs and close my door. 

I treat the minor scratches on my hands while I seethe in the bathroom, wondering why my eyes burn with unshed tears.  What right does he have, coming over to play hero as if he cares?

I hate that I miss him… that I’ve come to rely on seeing him and enjoy being with him.  It’s all his fault really.  He’s the one that forced himself into my life.  All the smiles, the jokes… All the touches and kisses that felt so nice…

And he just ripped that away.

After a few minutes of sulking down memory lane, I go down the stairs to see if Jason wants to go to a movie since our decorating time was cut short.  I hear laughter outside, and I look through the blinds, almost rolling my eyes.  “Of course,” I mutter, watching Chase finish hanging up the lights while Jason stabs fake tombstones in our yard.  I turn around and march right back up the stairs.  “Of course he would help out…. that stupid, stupid good looking jerk.”

*

I basically holed myself up inside for the remainder of the weekend.  I didn’t realize how long the day drones out without having Chase barging in or blowing up my phone.  It was truly pathetic.  Sure, I could have texted the girls, but they would just talk about how Chase has been acting, and I didn’t want to think about it anymore.

Walking from the school parking lot to the building, I shudder from the chill, wishing I picked a thicker sweater.  A car rushes and slams its break right in front of me before I can cross the main street.  I hold my chest, then look at the car and glare as his window rolls down. 

“Get in,” he commands with a determined face on.

I shake my head.  “Go away, Chase.”

Just as I take a step away, the softness of his voice makes me pause.  “Please, Katie.  I’ll explain everything.”

I turn to look at him, and the pleading look in his eyes has me nodding, making my way into his passenger seat.  Once I’m settled in, he drives off and I keep my eyes forward.  He stops at a coffee shop, and gets my favorite white mocha, and then he just drives.  Neither one of us speaks to each other.  The radio is barely loud enough to cover the awkward silence, but the further we get from town, the more I make myself comfortable in the seat.

After an hour and a half, I almost want to scold him because I definitely could have taken a nap, but then he turns off the exit and I see we are headed towards a lake.  Confusion settles in, but I’m still determined to not be the first one to talk.  He needs to atone for his behavior, so he can start the conversation.

The parking lot is near empty, and he pulls up right next to the beach.  After turning off his car, he gets out and finally looks at me.  I just raise my brow at him.  “Come on,” he says with a stupid smirk.

I sigh and get out, the cold air softly hitting my cheeks.  “Why are we here?”

He rounds the car and takes my hand, pulling me to the waterfront.  He doesn’t answer my question as his hold on my hand becomes gentle- rubbing his thumb along my fingers.  Once he deems a spot acceptable to stop at, he turns my body towards the water, and holds me from behind.

The familiar feeling of being in his arms stirs up those ratched butterflies, and I lean into his body, embracing his heat and listening to the soft waves.  “Are you done being an ass?”

His arms tighten their hold as he lets out a hard sigh.  He then kisses the side of my head.  “I was a jerk… I’m sorry.”

“Why?”

For a minute, I don’t think he’s going to answer.  “I realized something…”

“And what was that?” I ask softly.

“That I like you a lot,” he states, causing my heart to beat faster.  “I got jealous when I saw you with J.R. at the party.  You smiled easily and let him touch you without your hesitancy, like you have with me.  And then thinking that you weren’t available for me…” he lets out a hard sigh, “it just felt lonely…”  

I turn around to look at him.  The flutters in my stomach make me feel like I’m about to explode, and I open my mouth to say something…. anything… but I go blank.  It’s only when I see uncertainty cross his face that snap me back.  “Jere- J.R. and I are just friends, Chase.”  I reach up and caress his cheek.  “I like you too.”

His smile is instant, causing the same reaction out of me.  He quickly leans in for a kiss, pulling my waist in.  My arms immediately go around his neck as we have our own little make out session.  It feels different this time.  It feels real and just…. More.  In no time, we are both breathless as we pull apart.  He looks everywhere on my face, as if he’s looking at me in a different light.  It makes me feel a sense of special and I feel a blush coming up.

He thumbs my bottom lip, and part of me wants to take it in my mouth- definitely a thought I haven’t had before.  “Will you be my girlfriend, Katie?”

So, this is happiness?

“Of course,” I smile out.

*

We spent the rest of the day playing hookey the right way.  After a few more kisses and hugs at the waterfront of the lake, we went to a mall nearby to watch a movie and grab lunch.  We talked the entire drive home, and I didn’t think I could be so happy.  Everything felt great, natural, and exciting all at the same time.

Never in my wildest dreams did I think I could date a guy like Chase- one who was so sure of himself, who pushes me in all the best ways…. And now, he’s my boyfriend!

My first mistake was taking him to my room as soon as we got back.  Once he started kissing me, it made me want more.  His body is pressed into mine as I cradle his with my thighs.  Noises come out of me that I didn’t think was possible, and his ‘friend’ is definitely poking me.  He leans up to take off his shirt, and that’s when I begin to freeze.  Before he can come back down, I press my hands on his chest for him to stop.  Both of us are breathing heavily, and I would love nothing more than to continue to touch his body.  “Chase,” I exhale, “I’m not like the girls you’re used to….”

He sits back on his haunches and a small look of hurt flickers through his eyes.  “I know that….”

I scold myself, really not thinking this through.  I’ve never thought of being intimate with another guy after what happened to me, and thinking about it now… I just don’t know if I can give it to him.  I sit up and straighten my shirt, looking down at the blanket by his knees.  “I’m not ready for s*x, or anything similar to it.”  I look up to his face.  “I love kissing you, I do.  But I don’t know how long it’ll be before I am, and if that’s important to you, then…” I shrug my shoulders.   We both should have talked about this more before we became ‘official’.  What if he wants to back out now?  Things would become awkward, and he’ll ignore me again.  Or vice versa.  I don’t kno-

I didn’t even see him coming when he brushed his lips against mine softly, and I don’t even get a chance to react when he leans back once again.  “I don’t need s*x to be in a relationship, Katie,” he states, and I somewhat relax.  “And, in case you haven’t noticed, I haven’t been with anyone except you in the last few months.”  He thumps my nose.  “So give me a little credit, okay?  I’m not going to push you to do anything you don’t want to do.”

I quickly hug him, shocking him at first, but then he embraces me back.  I’m glad I have him in my life.  Maybe he’s just what I need right now.