Mute & Abused Mate

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Hello, my name is Fleurie, I am eighteen years old, and I live an awful life. Life was good for me until that storm came, the storm that smashed up my life.

It was difficult to watch my mother slowly fade away as she battled breast cancer.

I watched her struggle with the disease, and it was hard to believe she wasn't going to make it.

It was only a matter of time before that monster won.

The experience left me with many unresolved issues, as well as a sense of regret that I could have done more, that I could have done something; at the very least, I could have said goodbye.

I Remember.

In my memory, I remember her sitting at the piano, fingers tapping rhythmically, patiently listening to her students' rattles.

Her love of the sea is something I remember.

Sunflowers were her favourite flower, and I remember her love of them.

In the years before my mom died, and before the monster attacked her, I was very close to my father, who was my hero, my first date, and my best friend. However, when my mom died, all that came crashing down.

During my eighth year, I was overwhelmed with fear and anxiety, as a result of him emotionally abusing, physically abusing, and sexually abusing me.

It is impossible for me to remember what it is like not to cry after all my scars and bruises.

During the past few years, he has hit me, kicked me in the stomach, punched me, called me names, and blamed me for things I did not do. He started with just slapping; one time he said we had no eggs so I made two eggs, but he hit me until blood stained the floor, I kept begging him to stop, but he wouldn't listen.

I told him we didn't have any eggs.

He didn't come to a screeching halt.

He was having some fun when he r***d me.

My own father assaulted me and called me slurs like "b***h," "w***e," "s**t," and everything else that came to mind.

It didn't end with my father at home, People at my school bullied me.

When he struck me till I blacked out, I stopped talking and remained silent. Bullying has increased.

Everything that occurred to me was kept a secret.

Because he threatened to kill anyone and everyone who discovered the t*****e and other horrific things he did to me.

He did it once. I'm sure he'll do it again and again if given a chance. He is a monster who will never stop being a monster.

I couldn't even do anything to stop it from happening. I was a naïve little kid with no one in this world.

There are no other family members to seek protection from, and no friends to shout and gripe to.

My own brother abandoned me in this awful household, with no safety from the monster who lived there.

My family had turned on me.

The entire world had betrayed me.

I betrayed myself.

I can't even have trust in myself.