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Its been 5 days, 5 days since I was thrown here, 5 days since Nana Payton died. I got to know she truly died and wasn't pretending when they buried her four days ago. I feel guilty, so fvcking guilty. I killed her, I did. If I hadn't pushed her, if only I had allowed her hit me as usual then she would have been alive now and I wouldn't be in here, my mates wouldn't have hate the sight of me. I caused everything, it's all me. Mom haven't come visiting since the last time she came. Perhaps dad didn't allow her come here. I know mom wouldn't just leave me here. My right handmaid have been coming to keep me company which I didn't need and as usual I always chase her away but she always return back after few hours. She's been a pain in my neck. Queen Lilith appeared to me in my dream just yest