Dream: 3rd Book of Gravity

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Off to Old Home

Uncle Sven seemed to handle everything. All I had to do was pack my stuff and leave my home. The one I have been building for years now. One that I didn’t let him get in, and he seemed to respect me enough to just stand a few meters away from the house I built. Then before I knew it, there was a private car waiting where Uncle Sven stood, and we were whisked to the airport. A private plane flying directly to Finland was arranged.

“I didn’t know we owned a private plane”, I dropped to the nearest plush leather seat, deflating against the cold skin of leather.

“We don’t own this”. Uncle Sven sat directly in front of me, in the privacy of the cabin. I saw the circles under his eyes and the gauntness of his face. He looked tired. Worn out. “We’re renting from a close friend, and with the state of the ecosystem, it’s better if we own fewer jet planes and more of the commercial.”

I lick my gums, as I look at the empty halls, yet I smell the cabin crew perfume permeating the space they left. “Then why now?”

He gave me a lopsided smirk. “My companion is a flight risk.”

“Ah,” I nod. Right “I won’t run.”

“Boy,” he sighs. More of his exhaustion bleeds out of him along with sadness. He can’t seem to look me in the eye now, but he does stare at my hands. “Forgive me if I don’t believe that.”

It stings. But I deserve that.

I feel obligated to look away from him and occupy my vision with the airport in our window. The lights winked and twinkled in the dark as the plane seemed to reverse out of the gate. Something in me twists in response. The dread of leaving the home I finally recognized makes me want to claw at my skin.

A part of me still doesn't believe what my uncle is saying. For one thing, they are werewolves. They don’t just die. They live for hundreds of years, though they multiply less successfully because of it. So, dying… I find it hard to believe. But Uncle Sven isn’t the type to lie about things like that, no matter how much they want me back. Plus, traveling must have been like hell for him, as he needed a lot of permission from the Japanese packs. They aren’t exactly the most welcoming bunch.

We were already in the sky when Uncle Sven looked higher than my hands. His gaze never left my body, and I know he’s inching to cuddle me to death, but I’m not a kid anymore. He can’t coddle me like one either.

“You packed light,” he says, plain and simple but loaded with many, many things.

I pry my eyes away from the window and meet his eyes. “We agreed—”

“Yes, of course, but I meant that this one might take time” He waves his hand to stop me as he slumps back on his seat, heels clicking on the background making the both of us quiet.

The blonde attendant comes out with a pink-lipped smile. “Is there anything I can get for you gentlemen?”

Uncle Sven lazily rolls his head to the side with an even lazier polite smile. Almost condescending. “Food would be nice; I heard your lobster and snow crab are exquisite.”

“They are, and I do recommend them as they are seasonal meals here in Japan.”

“I would have both, and my companion here…”

I take a quick glance at the menu beside me, having no energy to lift it and rifle through it. “Just… fries.” I lick my lips.

“Fries… give him your best donburi steak too, and the best red Bordeaux you have.” He finally smiles enough to reach his eyes. “My nephew loves red.”

“No problem.” She smiles back with a twinkle in her eye and a slight blush before scampering to the back.

“You didn’t have to order for me,” I say once she’s out of earshot.

“Did I get it wrong?”

“I’m full”

“We’re going to be sitting here for more than 24 hours.” He matter-of-factly says, “You need to eat.”

Uncle Sven has always been like my father. I heard his voice, but I could also hear my father saying the same words. The same diction and accent whenever they talk in English. I haven’t heard Finnish for the longest time, and I think he knows it too, he is conscious of how long and far I have been from home. Plus, he is just as stubborn as my father.

I change the subject.

“How did you find me?” I ask, the leather seats swallowing me whole. I didn’t realize how tired I had been, and it had been a while since I was this tired. “I made sure that I wouldn’t be caught.”

“Sorry to burst your bubble, boy, but we always knew where you went or going. We just couldn’t follow you, not with other packs presiding over the territory and politics.” Sven sits on his seat with his knuckles flexing on his arms as if what he’s going to say pains him. “And… you didn’t want us to follow you, and we… wanted to respect your decision no matter—how painful it was to do so.” He had to spit the words out on the last sentence, and he looked away.

I purse my lips. Suddenly unsure if this was the right thing to do.

It was stupid of me to think that I would be able to go back home unscathed, when I left and hurt my whole family. How arrogant of me to think that I’d return to Japan all normal and easily close this chapter again.

I kept my mouth shut since then. Because I know I can’t carry this weight

The weight of guilt