Pavel
Tonight I want to tear out my hair when Kayla cries. It happens sometimes. She cried the first night we played—not during the scene, but after. She needed aftercare, and I didn’t give it. Even though I know it’s probably just an emotional release from the strain of her traumatic day, I feel like the biggest mudak.
I don’t show my distress—that would only make her bottle her release in an effort to please me. I rub her a*s with one hand and her back with the other. I don’t interrupt by asking her if she’s okay or what went wrong. I may not be the most experienced dom, but I know enough to make this a safe space for anything that comes out.
But as she lets out a torrent of tears, I’m sorry I promised not to kill the television director. I really, really want to pound his face right
