Tormenting Territory

Chapter 2

The school day is thankfully coming to an end, and I can slowly ease myself home to an existence I would most like to forget. While I have to walk home, the other students take the school bus that drives them all the way to their doors. It’s unfair, yes, but at the same time, it’s a pleasure for me. At least I won’t have to face them. My pack members often make life difficult for me enough to make me see it as a privilege not to be around them. This isn’t how it’s supposed to be in a pack; on the contrary. The pack members are seen as a family in the vast majority of wolf packs. No one needs to feel left out because everyone is included in all events, dinners, etc.

Unfortunately, the memo has yet to reach our pack, making me a social outcast no matter what I do to change that. In fact, I’m ashamed, not of myself, but of the pack, that they aren’t more responsive to following the rules that stand for common human decency. Instead, they behave as if they’re the biggest, the best, and the most beautiful. One is more important than the other, and Goddess forbids anyone to dare say they’re better than someone else. You understand my point, don’t you? I’m damn tired of the attitude towards cooperation and togetherness that’s basically non-existent. If the pack I belong to had the same values as all the other packs, I wouldn’t have to leave my home.

However, I know I won’t survive in this pack for the rest of my life with the daily verbal and physical abuse I endure. Well, generally, I would prevail, but a piece of me would die for every day that passed until nothing but a shell remained. It’s a fate I’m not willing to accept as my own. I deserve to be happy and live a healthy life with an everyday existence. No one can change my opinion, especially not when I know I’m right. The thing is, my pack thinks they’ve managed to break me down when in fact, they’ve only made a fool of themselves.

I’m an Alpha’s daughter; failures don’t exist in my world. They think they have won when in fact, they’ve lost everything that morality and ethics stand for. At the end of the day, I’m not the one to feel sorry for, but all the members who have lost themselves to the brink of insanity. They simply can’t crush me. An Alpha wolf has dominant instincts that are so strong that they’re practically imprinted in our DNA. We don’t bow to anyone, at least not voluntarily. It’s a strength and a weakness since many fear Alphas for that very reason, our dominant pride.

I don’t know if I’m an exception to that rule, but I don’t feel I have anything against disregarding what I want if it’s for someone I care about. Ask any other Alpha, and you’ll get the same answer: “I don’t bow to anyone; my word is their law.” That, for me, is frightening and makes me uncomfortable because it’s guaranteed to result in many lower-ranking wolves in the world being terrified. Afraid to ask for little things like an extra pillow to spice up their everyday life a little more or even to meet their basic needs like food and water. Therefore, I’m happy to make a pledge.

If I ever find myself in an Alpha position where others depend on my protection and guidance, I’ll take the time to listen to everyone. No one should have to experience the same alienation that I have to endure on a daily basis. You’ve probably heard that it’s essential to take time for yourself? Well, it’s less fun when you have no choice but to spend time with yourself, day and night, all year round. Now it has gone so far that I desperately want a friend, one single friend; that’s all I ask for. Someone I can talk to when everything feels heavy, someone to laugh with. Which is a very depressing thought when you think back to all the pack members who probably would’ve been my friends... if only I could shift.

In the packhouse, it looks just like usual. My packmates of the same age throw their jackets and bags on the floor for me to pick up. Adult wolves hold their coffee cups in the air, waiting for me to refill them with various drinks, and the puppies run around with muddy shoes indoors that I have to clean up after. The latter doesn’t bother me directly; they’re toddlers who don’t know better because their parents don’t take responsibility for teaching their children to treat others with respect. On the other hand, I’m the lowest-ranking wolf here; why would I deserve any respect? Why would I be tired after a whole day at school without lunch because my sister decided to ruin it?

The fact that I cleaned, washed, and scrubbed all yesterday after the members’ weekend creations, which resulted in me only getting three hours of sleep, is also not a priority, according to them. I have no value in this house, and it feels like a betrayal. My father is the f*****g Alpha in our pack, and my mom is the luna! If I got my wolf, I would be taking over one day, but I became unimportant just because she didn’t come, a gray parenthesis in history. Family members should stand up for each other and help create the best possible conditions. Instead, they avoid me as if I were infected with the plague.

What is it about me that absolutely no one in this house likes? I look good, do well in school, and am a caring person. Maybe it’s hidden from me, but I really don’t understand why I should be mistreated because I don’t have a wolf. I was born into this pack, grew up here, and loved every single one of our members as if they were my extended family. But the moment I turned sixteen and my wolf was MIA, they stopped caring about me, and many times it felt like they denied my existence. This isn’t a way of life but rather a slow and painful punishment for a crime I didn’t commit.

“Damn it, Sapphire!” Sophie exclaims, lying on the floor with an angry expression. “Stop f*****g daydreaming and clean up here! I could’ve f*****g died. You have no wolf, and you’re apparently useless at cleaning. I don’t understand why mom and dad don’t throw you out like the trash you are!”

One of the female wolves from Sophie’s clique helps her up, and they continue up the stairs. With a deep sigh, I begin my long afternoon by filling everyone’s coffee cups before picking all the things off the floor and then finish by mopping up all the mud. Thankfully, no one bothers me or creates a mess while I clean. Unfortunately, the chores take longer than I intended, which means that I can’t start studying as I planned because I have to cook dinner. If I’m late again, the members get angry, and I don’t want a hungry wolf pack after me when I have to cook for over two hundred people.

In case you’re wondering, no, I don’t have any superpowers. It’s impossible for me to cook for this many people alone when there’s barely an hour and a half left before dinner. In the kitchen, three girls work; they’re Omegas. We aren’t friends because I’m lower than them in rank. But at least we’re friendly to each other, and they’re the closest I can get to having a buddy. Although I’m lower in the hierarchy, our Alpha, Brogan Daniels, my father, gave me the task of planning the menu daily. I don’t know why he thinks that responsibility is appropriate for me, given that I take care of everything else in this house. Maybe it’s his way of making me feel included; I don’t know.

But I can’t complain either. My dad is one of the few in the pack who doesn’t mistreat me. However, he’s rarely at home but is out in the world at business meetings and alliance missions. Once he’s here, he doesn’t seem to want to acknowledge the problem but very quickly waves it off. However, it isn’t strange, considering he never sees me being mistreated. Somehow it has become a silent rule that if Alpha Daniels is at home, no one touches me when he’s around and can notice. Dad believes in hard work, and that’s why I get a lot of assignments like keeping track of the cleaning, cooking, etc.

He doesn’t do it because he hates or doesn’t like me but because he grew up with those values. “You aren’t working hard if you don’t fall asleep before your head hits the pillow,” he always says, and he’s right about that. I don’t even remember the last time I had trouble falling asleep, as I train my body daily when I do all the household chores on my schedule. He wants me to be involved, and since I would be the one who had the most to do when I took over as Alpha, maybe he thinks this isn’t a big deal. Honestly, I don’t know.

However, I understand he can’t hand over the Alpha position to me now; if you don’t have a strong wolf, you can’t lead. Wolves are similar to dogs in terms of behavior; they follow the dominant and authoritarian. Since I have no wolf, I also can’t show my dominance, leaving my human authority, which isn’t sufficient enough to make the other wolves obey my orders. Therefore, that responsibility passes to Sophie now, and despite me loving her, I know she’ll be a terrible Alpha. Above all, she’s simply selfish and lazy. If something is hard, she either ignores it or shifts the responsibility onto someone else to avoid working.

Seriously, I don’t even know if Dad is aware of this, considering that, as I said, he’s rarely at home. He trusts his mate, our mother, who has always been very cold towards me for some reason. Sophie has always been the one she prefers between the two of us. After my sister, it’s Bradley, our little brother, and lastly, me. However, I often wonder if I’m even on the list of people she considers her children. Bradley doesn’t know anything about how I’m being treated, and that’s because I never said anything. Why don’t I say anything? Because there’s no reason.

Even if I would tell him about how bad it is sometimes, he can’t do anything about it since he isn’t the next in line to the Alpha position and isn’t the favorite. Mom prefers and supports everything that Sophie does, which makes it clear that she’s favored more often than I would like. As I said, Dad follows Mom’s line no matter what, so it’ll be what Sophie wants. It has happened that I’ve tried to talk to my mother about feeling like an outcast, but unlike Dad, who at least usually tries to encourage me to turn the other cheek, she chooses to scold me because she thinks I’m just complaining.

After that, I stopped caring and instead began to focus on my ticket out of this shithole. I’ll never be what my parents want and won’t find happiness here. Then I’ll have to create it somewhere else. You can’t stop life from happening; no matter what you do, it’ll continue with or without you. I believe we create our own heaven and hell here on earth while we live. What you do and how you choose to live influences your success, whether in the job market or in your mood. No one can control your life and decide how you’ll live except you. Therefore I continue to fight to be able to start over.

“Excuse me, Gloria. Could you kindly take the butter out of the fridge?” I request as I start chopping the vegetables for our sauté. “Aimee, could you handle the meat today? Brit, would you mind taking care of the starters? And as usual, Gloria, you’re in charge of the desserts.”

After assigning sections to the workers, they nod in agreement and begin their tasks. Our establishment may seem like a restaurant, but we have found that offering a versatile buffet is the most practical approach. This way, we can cater to those with allergies or specific dietary preferences and minimize waste. Any surplus food is promptly frozen and saved for later consumption. It’s worth noting that our pack members are not only from a different era but are also known for their aristocratic status.

Therefore, we Omegas aren’t allowed to eat in the same room as the others, but, just like the humans’ servants, they should eat in another room after completing their daily chores.

It’s really unfortunate, I’m aware, but there’s nothing I can do about it. Most of the time, I let the other Omegas choose from the leftovers before taking what I want; if it depends on my conscience or if I unconsciously follow the hierarchy, I don’t know. However, I often am without food, and it happens specifically when Dad is away. Then there’s no longer anyone who unconsciously “protects” me from being subjected to abuse in the form of beatings, taunts, and sometimes even starvation. I eat correctly when he’s home, and when he goes away, I lose weight again just to repeat the whole thing when he returns. It’s not healthy to commute weight this way, I know that, but there’s not much I can do at the moment.

I need to be careful not to cause any trouble right now, as it could prevent me from leaving in the summer. I must follow all instructions from my pack members and wait for the day when I can finally be myself and shed my submissive image. I kindly remind Aimee not to forget the thyme for the roast and gently inform her of the hot frying pan as I approach her. Our teamwork in the kitchen is impeccable, and we maintain clear communication with each other. Our shared objective is to avoid displeasing the higher-ranking members, which is why we all strive to be our best and offer assistance in any way possible, primarily through obedience.

The mere mention of that word “obedience” leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. It makes me feel like an animal, and despite understanding its necessity, it’s still a degrading experience. Today has been exhausting, and I’m looking forward to getting some much-needed rest. While I love cooking, it’s less enjoyable when no freedom of choice exists. I can only hope that this day comes to an end soon.