My Little Ghost

Volume 1.4.4 — The Transcendence

Bai Bing Wen is staring in a trance at the ceiling made of compressed bamboo leaves. He can’t concentrate at all even if he’s already dying to cultivate to get his core back to work. He was supposed to get a bit of clarity from the other Crown Princes when the flashes of Huang Di’s locked memories with Meng Zhang hit him like a flood. The kisses, the love making, and the mischief they caused while escaping the Central Empire’s palace one night—it was all too exhilarating for Huang Di and a nightmare to watch for Bai Bing Wen. He felt like he just cheated on Ji Feng Huang even though they are not even together yet and it technically wasn’t him who spent time with Meng Zhang.

He’s never imagined that the quiet Crown Prince Huang Di would have done something so far from his personality, and yet, these scenes are what he has been looking at for the last three or four hours, and the three other Crown Princes outside have no clue what made him just suddenly call it a day and leave the dining room. He ended up not getting a bite of whatever Meng Zhang prepared for them and not hearing what else Ling Guang had to say about these black and white roses.

But before walking out, he especially took a long, lingering look at Meng Zhang who only stared back at him cluelessly.

He figures that it probably was what led to Huang Di’s wild adventures a few weeks before accidentally meeting Ji Feng Huang in that liquor house. Although it wasn’t necessarily an accident for Ji Feng Huang, Bai Bing Wen never saw Huang Di’s recollection of ever seeing Ji Feng Huang or Lady Ji Wen in that place. And for some reasons, that liquor house was the same place, too, where Huang Di first met Meng Zhang. Could it be that the Crown Prince Huang Di was feeling a sort of special attachment to that place because of their encounter so he kept coming back? Was he having an awful case of nostalgia? Or was he expecting to see the same man wearing an azure mask every time he walked in?

These are just a few of those questions keeping Bai Bing Wen up, and it doesn’t help that Ji Feng Huang isn’t even here to give him a sense of comfort.

“Are you awake?”

Bai Bing Wen’s eyes slowly get back in focus after hearing that knock, followed by a familiar voice. He doesn’t answer, but the voice calls out again.

“I can hear your uneven breathing, Your Highness.”

Bai Bing Wen sighs, sitting up in bed. Is he not allowed to be alone anymore? He really doesn’t want to face this person yet, but sooner or later, he has to.

“Just my luck,” he mumbles inwardly.

He reckons he might as well get it over and done with now.

“Hey,” he greets after opening the door.

Meng Zhang’s eyes widen at him. “Why are you speaking so casually with me?”

Bai Bing Wen gives him a hopeless smile. “Have we not been talking so casually before this?”

When Meng Zhang doesn’t answer and instead only stares at him suspiciously, Bai Bing Wen clears his throat.

“Where I’m from, it’s a form of greeting, Your Highness. I’m sorry, I should have been more considerate,” he replies.

Meng Zhang nods, looking at the floor. “Hmm. About what I said earlier—”

“Let’s talk inside,” Bai Bing Wen cuts him off, sliding the door further to invite him in. Although the chances of not getting heard by cultivators with higher cultivation than him is almost zero, it’s still less awkward if they don’t accidentally see someone else in the house if they need to talk about the past between Meng Zhang and Huang Di.

Meng Zhang looks a bit out of place before nodding again and looking up at Bai Bing Wen. “Can you, at least, put on some clothes, Your Highness?”

Bai Bing Wen glances at himself and realizes he’s wearing only what is considered to be a set of undergarments in this world. “Right. I’ll be right back.”

He mentally curses himself for not being conscious enough to remember this little detail. But despite knowing that the heat coming from wearing multiple layers of clothes is going to make him feel uncomfortable, Bai Bing Wen still wears the normal customary layers of robes before opening the door again. As a courtesy to Meng Zhang who’s not used to his customs, he’s going to endure this. And besides, knowing that Huang Di had been naked in front of this man before is enough to make him want to wrap himself up with so much layers like an onion.

Or maybe, it really just doesn’t sit well with him that this man is friends with Ji Feng Huang and they just had to be involved with the same body, regardless of whose souls and spirits is possessing it.

“So... what are we going to talk about?” Bai Bing Wen starts, sitting on his bed.

Meng Zhang pulls a chair to sit right in front of him. They are at a decent distance in Bai Bing Wen’s standard but knowing the conservative outlook of this world, he’s guessing that Meng Zhang is trying to act casual around him, too. “Ling Guang and I talked about what’s going on in the Central Empire’s palace. I hope you don’t mind us talking like that.”

Bai Bing Wen nods, partly relieved to hear that they’re starting the conversation lightly. “I don’t mind. Besides, that place isn’t really my home. And I’m not the real Crown Prince so...”

“You’re right. I was friends with the Crown Prince before and I’ve known him for so long. The two of you really are... different.”

Bai Bing Wen crosses his arms over his chest. “You sound disappointed.”

Meng Zhang, a bit flustered to hear this, covers his mouth. “I do? I didn’t notice, forgive me.” He bows his head a little but Bai Bing Wen pats his shoulder.

“It’s fine. Stop apologizing for being being too honest of your feelings. Maybe once we find a way for me to get back home, the Crown Prince would come back, too, so stop worrying so much.”

Meng Zhang nods, a ghost of a smile threatening to show up on his face. “I hope so, too. And I hope... that he could still get back his memories about me when that happens.”

Bai Bing Wen stares at Meng Zhang for so long that Meng Zhang ends up frowning at him.

“Is there anything you wish to say to me?”

Bai Bing Wen contemplates whether or not to let Meng Zhang know that Huang Di never lost his memories of him. If anything, amongst the four Crown Princes, he’s the one who has the strongest impression on Huang Di, taking up about eighty percent of his collective memories of all the Crown Princes. But saying so would also bring about the question of what the Crown Prince remembers and it would be really awkward for Bai Bing Wen to explain something like that to Ji Feng Huang’s friend.

What would he say then? That he remembers the taste of peaches when their lips touched? Or that Meng Zhang’s hair smelled like lavenders when they first met? This really is something he would rather not know. There are times that he gets embarrassed at the thought of getting caught while doing crazy things. He’s never expected to feel more humiliated for witnessing other people doing them.

And yet, all other sensations in Huang Di’s memories are difficult to fathom. The only ones that Bai Bing Wen could almost feel for himself are those that consist Meng Zhang in them. Maybe because to Huang Di, those memories with Meng Zhang are what mattered to him the most so they are all kept in a special place with so much care.

“Xiao Bing” Meng Zhang calls out with a worried voice.

“Just... I really hope you get to see the Crown Prince Huang Di again. He seems like a very special friend to you.”

Meng Zhang gives him a sad smile, making Bai Bing Wen feel even guiltier. “He is. And also, don’t worry about it. When I’m looking at you, I still see a Crown Prince. Even if you’re not Huang Di, you’re a noble on your own for dealing with all this with a sane mind and a graceful heart. So thank you for trusting us enough to tell us who you really are.”

Bai Bing Wen nods again, sighing deep in frustration. “Are you going to tell me what you and Ling Guang talked about?” Regardless of which kind words Meng Zhang offers him, it still doesn’t take away the tone of disappointment that Meng Zhang’s voice exudes every time he says something to prove that the person he’s talking to right now is no longer Huang Di.

“I informed him that the Central Empire’s palaces are in such disarray at the moment,” Meng Zhang answers. He also explains that he relayed the content of Ji Feng Huang’s message and what they have discovered so far. After patiently telling all this to Bai Bing Wen, Meng Zhang smiles up at him. “Ji Feng Huang is one of the most talented mages I’ve ever met. He can manage on his own and get out of there alive. I know you might be worried about him and that’s good, but for the sake of your mental health, try not to think too much about it.”

Bai Bing Wen looks at the ring around his finger. He hates that he can’t do anything right now, but there has to be some way for these powerhouses to help him get Ji Feng Huang out of that place. “Are we going to just wait for him?”

“It would put his life in jeopardy if we plan to rescue him without him knowing. So for now, it’s best to just wait until we find a way to let him know that there are more of us here now and rescuing him isn’t impossible if he would let us.”

“I have a way to communicate with him but I would need a bit of a high-leveled cultivator’s spiritual energy. My core—my dantian is still not responding so well with my commands so I would rather borrow someone else’s spiritual energy to activate a special talisman than wait. Also, my cultivation in this body is not that high yet so...”

Meng Zhang scowls at him. “How is that even possible?”

“What do you mean?”

“Borrowing a high-leveled cultivator’s spiritual energy to activate a special talisman?” Meng Zhang repeats.

Bai Bing Wen gapes at him for a bit before explaining lightly, “Borrowing spiritual energy from a cultivator with a superior level is just a piece of cake, especially if I’m going to borrow it from someone with a potential to immortality. The special talisman... Well, it has something to do with some tricks we’ve learned from the modern world.”

Meng Zhang can only stare at him with doubtful eyes. “Piece of cake, huh? What a strange analogy.”

“It’s an expression from where I came from. Okay, you know what? Just to be transparent, I’ll teach you how to do it but I’ll teach Ji Feng Huang first so he won’t get the wrong idea.”

Chuckling freely for the first time in front of Bai Bing Wen, Meng Zhang crosses his arms over his chest, too. “What are you talking about? Why would he get the wrong idea? We’re both men.”

Bai Bing Wen shrugs, smiling his dimpled smile. For someone who’s already been involved with another man, Meng Zhang sure knows how to act so innocent.“Where I’m from, relationships between two men aren’t uncommon. So special treatments to anyone could mean anything and even if this world doesn’t acknowledge that as anything at all, in respect of Ji Feng Huang’s feelings for me, I would rather not make him feel like I’m being biased to someone other than him.”

“Oh. You are so conceited if you think my friend likes you that much,” Meng Zhang tells him in between peals of laughter.

Bai Bing Wen shakes his head, laughing along. A few seconds after, he speaks again. “Can I ask you something, Your Highness?”

“Hmm...” Meng Zhang pretends to think about it but the smile on his face is already giving away his answer. “What is it?”

“Earlier, when I said that I am Ji Feng Huang’s future husband... why did you look so surprised?”

Meng Zhang stares at him for a bit before answering, “Just because.”

“Really?”

“To be honest, I’ve known of Feng-Feng’s intention to infiltrate the Central Empire’s harem just to get closer to you, or at least, the Crown Prince Huang Di. In fact, I came in this empire earlier than Feng-Feng so that I can meet the Crown Prince and introduce them to one another, but some things took the wrong turn when the Hei Meigui cultivators found a way to enter this realm and suddenly, we were held back for almost an entire solstice.”

“What does this have to do with the fact that you’re surprised to hear that I’m going to be Ji Feng Huang’s husband?”

There’s a look of sadness flashing in Meng Zhang’s eyes, but he conceals it quickly. “It’s just that I wasn’t prepared to hear you confirm it. I didn’t think you would agree to the marriage that easily.”

Bai Bing Wen strongly wishes that the Crown Prince in front of him isn’t hoping that Huang Di is just pretending to be someone else in front of him now just because Meng Zhang refused to marry him. If that’s the case, then this arrangement could only get more complicated in the future.

He resolves to just let it be for a moment or until Ji Feng Huang is back before he talks about this with Meng Zhang again. “By the way,” he starts, “I’m not being conceited. You can ask your friend if you don’t believe me. He was the one who fell for my looks at first sight and admitted to it just as fast.”

At this, Meng Zhang’s laughter is back. “Okay, I’m done listening.” He stands up from his seat, at least, this time looking more at ease around Bai Bing Wen. He seems to unconsciously grope for that four-leaf clover hanging on his belt before saying, “You can borrow from anyone of us, if you want. Just let us know what plan you have in mind so we can find a way to work around it.”

Bai Bing Wen follows Meng Zhang’s moves with his eyes as the man walks away.

But Meng Zhang pauses at the door and looks back. “For the record, you really are one good-looking lad. I hope you don’t blame my friend for saying that because, really. It’s your fault, too. You should tone down the enchanting smile if you hate being admired so quickly like that.” Meng Zhang finally walks out of the door and slides it close behind him. “Have a good night, Xiao Bing,” he says a little too loudly before footsteps fade in the hallway.

Bai Bing Wen is gaping for the nth time at the door. It might be considered as a passing thought for Meng Zhang, but hearing him say something like that has made Bai Bing Wen’s attempts to make a casual friendship with Meng Zhang all go in vain. Meng Zhang isn’t supposed to look at him like that. He’s not supposed to let Meng Zhang think like that. He may be over-analyzing Meng Zhang’s remarks but Bai Bing Wen is not stupid. The Crown Prince of the Eastern Empire is probably still seeing Huang Di in him and this could become troublesome in the future if they’re going to spend more time together in one place.

He would rather not put Ji Feng Huang in such awkward situations.