Obsession

Chapter 4

My eyes spring open when I hear noises coming from my bedroom window. I lay still for a few minutes, too paralyzed with fear to move.

When I'm finally able to turn my head, a shadowy silhouette moves on the other side of the white blinds that cover my bedroom window.

When I hear the window creak open, I dart towards the door.

"Mara," a deep voice whispers. "It's just me."

I stop and turn around, pressing my back up against the door as I watch Kai climb through my window and close it back shut. He's wearing his black hoodie with the hood pulled over his face, but I know it's him. I've memorized each of his features a long time ago, including the exact frame and build of his body.

"Why are you climbing through my window?" I ask with a shaky voice.

He pulls his hood back revealing his masterpiece of a face. Just the sight of him makes me weak and defenseless.

He silently crosses the room and takes my hand into his. His skin is cold and calloused, but the warmth it sends through my body takes my breath away.

His brown eyes are so intense; more intense than I've ever imagined. He touches my face and closes his eyes, pressing his forehead to mine. "I just want to be close to you."

"What? But you said-"

"Shhh," he whispers, cutting me off. He wraps his arms around me and hugs me tight. "It doesn't matter what I said. I just need to know what it feels like to hold you."

I finally pull myself out of the cloud of confusion I've been in since his unexpected arrival. I've wanted this for so long. I've always wondered what it would be like to hold him. I never imagined he wondered the same thing too. I wrap my arms around his waist and close the tiny bit of space that remained between us.

I press my head against his chest and listen to his heartbeat. I'm overwhelmed by emotion. I want to cry, laugh, scream, all of it. Holding Kai is everything I thought it would be.

No, it's more. It's so much more.

He finally pulls away, but keeps one arm wrapped securely around my waist. He brushes the stray hairs away from my face and for the first time since I've met him, he smiles at me.

His smile is so unbelievably perfect. He is definitely, without hesitation, the most beautiful thing I've ever laid my eyes on.

"Stay with me tonight," I whisper.

He's surprised by my invitation, but nods slowly. "Okay."

I lay back down in my bed and he climbs in next to me, still fully clothed. He wraps his arms around me and pulls my back against his chest. I can feel his breath on the back of my neck, making me shiver.

His scent is everywhere, masculine, with a dash of something sweet. Peppermint, maybe?

There's so many things I want to say; so many questions I want to ask. But I don't want anything to ruin this perfect moment. Instead, I close my eyes and enjoy being in the arms of the man I've wanted for so long.

As I'm drifting off to sleep, I feel his lips press gently to the side of my neck. "I love you, Mara," he whispers.

The next time my eyes open, sunlight is peeking through the blinds.  I sit up and look around my room, but Kai's not here. I throw the covers back and get out of the bed, slowly walking over to the window. I peek through the blinds, noticing just how high up my bedroom window actually is.

What a cruel trick for my brain to play on me. What an evil thing for my mind to do. It all felt so real. Too real.

The tears come without warning. My heart sinks into a deep, dark place; a place it's never been before. I fall face-down into my pillow and scream out.

I keep replaying the dream over and over, wondering how I could dream of him so vividly on the night I swore I'd forget about him. Why now? Is this a sign? And if it is, what does it mean? Kai obviously doesn't want me. He made that clear last night.

"Mara?" I soft voice calls out from the other side of my bedroom door. "It's Rue and Anna. Can we come in?"

My friends are all too aware of my obsession. Of course, they both think I'm crazy. I guess maybe they're right.

While I want to tell them to go away and leave me to wallow in self-pity for the rest of the day, I know I need help if I'm going to kick this whole Kai obsession. I pull myself up out of the bed and wrap my comforter around me. I open the door to reveal the shocked faces of my best friends.

Rue figures it out right away and gets that protective, big-sister look in her eyes. The one that silently asks, who's ass do I need to kick? Anna only stares at me in confusion. Her long red hair is a mess, like she just got out of the shower and didn't have time to dry it.

"What happened?" Anna asks. "Please tell me it wasn't Leo..."

"What?!" Rue snaps. She slams her fist into her hand and growls. "What did that little bastard do?!"

My eyes narrow in confusion. "Nothing. Leo..." I trail off, as if I'm only jut remembering who Leo even is. "Leo was great."

They both let themselves into my room and plop down on my bed, making themselves at home. "Then what's wrong?" Rue asks.

That familiar lump rises in my throat again, making it difficult to talk. "It's Kai."

Rue's eyes widen in surprise before narrowing into slits. Before she has a chance to spout off any death threats, I hold my hand up to stop her. "Nothing like that. The battery died in my car last night and while I was walking to your apartment, Kai saw me and stopped to give me a ride."

Both their mouths drop open.

"While I had the chance, I figured I'd just ask him why he never talks to me. He didn't answer, but...after he dropped me off, he stopped me..." I take a second to swallow back my tears. "He told me he's not the kind of guy I need."

Anna stares at me like she's waiting for more. Rue only rolls her eyes. "I could've told you that seven years ago."

"I don't understand," Anna says. "Why now? Unless..."

Rue gives Anna a bored look. "No. Do not give this girl any ideas."

"I think he likes you too, he's just really...different. And maybe he doesn't know how to tell you that he wants more," Anna shrugs.

"I will admit, it's strange that he offered you a ride all of a sudden. Remember that time he walked passed you in Mrs. Gardener's class in the 11th grade when you had that allergic reaction to peanuts?" Rue reminds me. "He acted like he could care less and your life was on the line then. But now? I don't know..."

"I do. He doesn't want me. He's never going to. And there's nothing I can do about it..." I say sullenly.

"Well, there might be," Anna suggests.

Rue and I look at her like she's insane. She only grins. "Okay, this is going to sound crazy, but hear me out. My Aunt Roma is a charmer. She creates these concoctions to manipulate people's emotions. I used to think she was insane, but then my mom tried it on my dad after he asked for a divorce. It worked."

"What do you mean concoctions?" I ask.

"I don't know. Some kind of mixture of herbs and stuff? She placed them in a tea bag and my mom made it into a tea and dad drank it. After that, he was totally obsessed with her and their marriage has never been better."

"Please don't tell me you believe this crap," Rue says, giving me a worried look.

"It's true!" Anna defends herself. "Ask my mom yourself!"

I think about it for a while. I'm convinced this is all just some crazy coincidence and Anna's aunt is a raving mad lunatic. But I'm also a fool in love. A fool that would do anything for that love to be returned.

Anything.