Entangled

15

"You were always beautiful."

Umalis ang tingin ni Deniah sa ginagawa at napanganga sa sinabi ng lalaki. Sa buong taon na kilala niya si Dark Arkel, wala itong ginawa kundi, asarin, pahirapan at insultuhin siya.

He had never called her beautiful.

Nagbisi-bisihan ito sa ginagawa sa harap ng kalan at nang magsalita ito ay casual ang tono ng boses. "Alam mo kung ano ang ibig kong sabihin. Beautiful in the sense of sisterly. Nasaksihan ko ang mga pagbabago niyo ni Alana, hanggang kayo'y nagdalaga na. Neither of you are ugly. Or fat. I think you're being hard on yourself."

Oo, naintindihan ni Deniah ang ibig niyang sabihin. Hindi siya nakikita niyo bilang isang ganap at magandang babae, kundi bilang isang nakakabatang babaeng kapatid na gumanda paglaki. Pinigilan niya ang sariling masaktan sa sinabi nito. "Well, kakainin ko pa rin itong salad. At ayaw mo nang makarinig ng anumang comment tungkol sa babae."

"Fine. Pwede ka bang magbukas ng bite ng white wine. There's one chilling in the fridge."

Binuksan niya ang fridge at nilabas ang bote ng Chardonnay at tinanggal ang cork saka nagsalin sa wine glass. She watched him sip it. The citrusy scents of wood and fruit rose to her nostrils. She battled for one minute, then surrendered. One glass. After all, she deserved it.

Nagsalin siya sa isang baso baso at sumispsip. The liquid slid down the back of her throat, the taste both tingly and dry. She uttered a low moan of pleasure. Her tongue licked the edges of her lips and her eyes closed as the flavor pulsed through her body.

......

Nagsimula nang magsalita si Arkel ngunit napatigil siya sa nakita.

The sight of her sipping and enjoying her wine put every muscle in his body in a lock. The blood pounded through his veins and his groin shot to full alert. Her tongue licked her lips with such delicate strokes, he wished she tasted something other than the wine. He wondered if she made those throaty sounds when a man was buried deep inside her wet, clinging heat. He wondered if she'd be as tight and hot as her mouth, closing around him like a silky fist, milking every last drop of his reserve and still demanding more. Those stretchy pants revealed every curve of her body, from her sweet butt to the luscious length of her legs. Her sweatshirt had ridden up and flashed him with a strip of bare skin. And obviously she'd ripped off her bra, not thinking of him as a man who wanted her, but more like an annoying older brother without male urges.

Damn her, sinisimulan nang gawing komplida ang sitwasyon nila. Tinapos niya ang paghahanda ng mga pagkain at inayos ang mga ito sa mesa.

"Stop drinking the wine like that. You're not in a porno flick."

Suminghap ang babae sa tinuran niya.

"Hey! Huwag mong ibuhos sa akin ang frustration mo. I can't help it if business was more important to you than a real marriage."

"Yeah, but as soon as I gave a price you jumped. I bought you just as much as you bought me."

Sumandok ang babae ng pasta sa plato niya. "Sino ka ba para i judge ako? Sa buong buhay mo nabibigay lahat ng luho mo. You got a Mitsubishi Eclipse for your sixteenth birthday. I got a Chevette."

Nanigas siya sa alaala. "You got a family. I got shit."

Tumigil ito, pagkuway kumuha ng garlic bread with mozzarella. "You got Alana."

"I know."

"Anong nangyari sa inyo? Close naman kayo dati ah."

Nagkibit- balikat siya. "Nagbago siya nong highschool. Bigla na lang na di na niya ako kinakausap. She stopped letting me in her room for our talks, then shut me out completely. So, I let her go and concentrated on having a life of my own. You lost touch with her for a while back then, didn't you?"

"Yeah. Inisip ko noon na baka may nangyari, pero wala naman siyang binanggit at kung tatanungin ko naman ayaw niyang magsalita. Anyway, meron din hindi pagkakaintindihan sa pamilyo ko non, kaya di ka nag- iisa."

"Pero buo pa rin kayo."

She laughed and crammed a mouthful of pasta into her mouth. "Marami paring dapat ayusin si Dad, but I think we've managed to heal the cycle."

"Cycle?"

"Karmic cycle or karma. When someone screws up really bad and hurts you. Our first instinct is to hurt back, or refuse to forgive"

"Sounds reasonable."

"Ah, but now the cycle of hurt and abuse continues. Noong bumalik siya, nagdesisyon akong meron lang akong isang ama at tatanggapin ko anuman ang kaya niyang ibigay. Eventually, tinigil niya ang pag- inom at ginagawa ang lahat to make up for the past."

Arkel made a rude sound. "Umalis siya bata ka pa lang at iniwan niya ang pamilya niyo dahil sa kanyang bisyo. Inabandona ang kambal. At bumalik siya para himingi ng tawad? Why would you even want him in your life?"

Tumusok ito ng shrimp gamit ang tinidor. "I made a choice," se said. "Hinding- hindi ako makakalimut, pero kung nagawa ng nanay ko na patawarin siya, bakit di ko din gawin? Family sticks together no matter what happens."

The simplicity of her ability to forgive shook him to the core. He poured more wine. "Better to walk away with your head held high and your pride intact. Let them suffer for all the pain they caused."

Napaisip ito sa kanyang sinabi. "I almost did. Pero narealize ko na maliban sa tatay ko siya, tao rin naman siya na nagkakamali. Oo, intact pa naman ang pride ko kung sakali pero mawawalan naman ako ng ama. When I made my decision I broke the cycle. He ended up getting sober and rebuilt our relationship. Have you ever thought of contacting your father?"

His emotions slammed into hyper-speed. Arkel fought past the old bitterness and managed a shrug. "Alexander Huxley doesn't exist in my eyes. That was my decision." He prepared for pity but her face only reflected a deep empathy that soothed him. How many times had he craved an actual beating or a punishment from his father instead of neglect? Somehow, the not caring burned deeper and festered.

"Eh, ang nanay mo?"

Nagconcentrate siya sa kanyang plato. "Ayon, may bagong lalaki na naman. It makes her feel important daw kapag may nagbibigay atensyon daw sa kanya."

"Nagkikita ba kayo madalas?"

"The idea of an adult son reminds her of age. She likes to pretend I don't exist."

"I'm sorry."

Simpleng mga salita pero tumagos sa puso niya. Itinaas niya ang ulo mula sa pagkakayuko. For one second, awareness and energy and understanding pulsed in the air between them, then slid away as if it had never occurred. His lopsided smile mocked his own confession. "Poor little rich boy. But you're right about one thing—that was a hell of a Mitsubishi."

Tumawa ang babae. "Ikwento mo naman sa akin ang deal na inaatupag mo ngayon. Mukhang malaki dahil pinili mong maging celibate ng isang taon."

"I want to involve Dreamscape in a bid to build down by the Boho River."

"Really? Narinig ko na gusto nilang magtayo don ng spa, mga restaurants. Dati kasi maraming takot na pumunta don sa river."

He leaned forward with eagerness. "The area's changing. They've beefed up security, and the few bars and shops already there are doing well. This will break the area wide open to both residents and tourism. Can you picture lit pathways along the water, with outside lounges? How about a huge spa that overlooks the mountains while you get a massage? It's the future."

"Narinig ko din na maraming malalaking kompanya ang balak magtayo don."

"I'm going to get the contract."