The Wicked Alpha's Star-Crossed Luna

9 | JOY AND FEAR

Lucien POV

Never had so much joy brought me so much fear.

When I arrived in Starry Sky, I expected for the daughters of high-ranking wolves to throw themselves at me--a thought that still made my lip curl in disgust. There was nothing that I despised more than to have strangers fawn over me in the hopes of winning my favor. It certainly wasn’t the “charm” inherited by my Styx lineage that drew them in. My mother and Juno would always assure me that it was my looks that did the trick. As if I needed another reason to curse my reflection.

Not her, though. She was instantly different.

When I gestured to my naked body, clad in only a towel, she didn’t step closer or make a lewd pass in an attempt at flirtation. She immediately spun around and gave me privacy--and when I moved closer under the guise of accessing some drawers just so I could take in more of her decadent scent, she pulled away, like a game of cat and mouse.

She smelled like Yule time. Like fresh-brewed hot chocolate with a hint of cinnamon--sweet with a bit of spice. Like warm blankets by the fireplace, like soft singing and warm tugs on heartstrings. She smelled like the best part of my childhood, one of the only seasons I was allowed to leave behind my prince title and truly be a kid.

Her name sounded like someone was playing a few notes on a piano. It tasted like heaven as it rolled off my tongue, and I knew she liked hearing me say it, too, based on her gorgeously flushed face.

She was little, petite, her head reaching no higher than my chest. She had an hourglass figure and curves that could kill; even so, I could tell she took pride in her health, as her arms and calves hinted at muscles beneath her soft latte skin. Her curls were the shade of a raven’s feathers, shimmering with different colors wherever the light hits it, and the fact that she had her hair pooled on top of her head in a bun left her neck exposed. Othello was howling and panting in my head, urging me to take our mate to bed right then and there. He wanted to sink his teeth in her, to mark her as ours while we filled her with our seed. I could see it all--her walking down the aisle arm-in-arm with her father, her cradling her swollen stomach as her skin glows from pregnancy, her carrying first a golden-haired baby, to a toddler, to holding a small child’s hand while another baby with her hair and eyes clings to her side. I wanted to have as many children as she was willing to give me, even if every single one of them looked like her.

Granted, I’m sure my father would have come to despise her if that last part ever came true, but his opinions weren’t sought after in my company. I didn’t care about finding a chosen mate that met his specific guidelines and carrying on the royal line of the Styx family. That’s the entire reason we were visiting every pack in the kingdom--to find candidates that met his standards. According to him and the Council of Elders, the best candidate would be an alpha’s daughter who had spent her entire life training to be someone else’s luna. She would have never worked a day in her life, never sought out education beyond high school, and never trained with the pack’s warriors.

Sure, Carina checked some of those boxes--the most important ones, Chandler assured me. As one of the daughters of the alpha of our oldest and best ally, my father would have a difficult time finding a reason not to approve. Plus, she had spent her entire life being trained by her mother, the current luna… She was just also being trained in alpha matters by her father, the current alpha, up until she was twelve years old when it was determined that Serena would take over as alpha. Even her pursuit of higher education could put her high on his list, since her college courses included sociology and leadership. However, I didn’t see the point in her biology courses and knew my father would protest the hell out of that, but I would happily escort my mate to clown college if she so desired. Some would probably hear that and think, “Ah, she begged you by giving you some cute puppy eyes, right?”

On the contrary; my mate met my gaze head-on, with zero reservation, and in a calm, composed voice that lost any semblance of nervousness, she said: “I’m a biology major, and I take some leadership courses as well. I want to continue my education, even as I prepare for my future role by your side. I hope you understand.”

Understand? I was downright elated. I thought I would be forced to marry some empty-headed, spoiled-rotten brat from a pack with bad manners and ignorant opinions. To not only find my true mate, but to discover that she was a kind, sincere, educated individual was the greatest gift a goddess could ever bestow. So, I returned Carina’s determined expression with one that I hope conveyed all the deep, complex emotions she was already making me feel.

I was so happy to have met her when I did.

I was grateful that she was a good person, like my mother.

I was hungry for her in mind, body, and soul; I wanted to learn everything about her, to hear her laugh and know what makes her cry, to be intimate with her in a way neither of us had ever experienced before.

And even with all that… Part of me felt fear. This tiny she-wolf already had me wrapped around her little finger, and we had only just met. If she told me to jump, I’d ask, “How high?” If she jumped off a bridge, I would follow with zero hesitation. If she handed me poison, I would drink it and thank her with my dying breath. She could so easily ruin me, and I just might let her.

As evidenced by the fact that I was willingly complying with anything she wanted, even after she reacted so poorly to my being the future king and she and her sister left the room, all of which took place a few minutes prior to her show of confidence.

I couldn’t help myself; Juno was regaling my future in-laws with our visit to a different pack that led to us apprehending several suspects affiliated with Dark Moon, and my gold wolf senses were far more heightened than those of the average alpha…

I heard it all. Every last word.

★FLASHBACK★

“Am I being dumb?” My mate sighed, sounding apprehensive.

I almost frowned at that. My precious mate could never be dumb.

“Depends on what you’re potentially being dumb about,” her sister opined in a somewhat playful tone. She was similar to me--stoic. If only a little more sarcastic that myself.

“Why aren’t you as freaked out as I am?” asked Carina.

I did frown at that. Why would either of them freak out? Or is that some slang used by women in their early twenties these days?

You really need to get out more, man, Othello grumbled, rolling his eyes at me.

“Cari, I jumped up and ran over to protect you because I’ve literally spent the entire meeting thinking about everything that’s happened in the past two hours,” said her sister, piquing my interest. “Trust me, I’m freaking the f**k out.”

“Really?” asked my mate.

“Really,” her sister confirmed.

Neither woman spoke for a moment before Carina whispered, “Do you think your mate is part of Dark Moon?”

Alarm bells were going off in my head. What the hell were they talking about?

Serena let out a shaky breath. “I want to say ‘no’... But it can’t be a coincidence.”

“So you think he is?” Carina pressed. I was proud of my mate, not accepting vague answers.

You’re just saying that because you’re as nosy as I am, Othello chortled. Admit it.

No I’m not, I insisted. But if Dark Moon is involved--you know, the rogue pack that has declared itself enemies with not only Starry Sky but also Red Eclipse--then there’s more at stake here, Otto. We have to protect our mate at all costs.

Othello hmphed, annoyed by the nickname I used for him, but otherwise said nothing. We were in agreement; our mate’s safety came first.

Serena’s next confession hit me like a ton of bricks. “I think he’s their alpha.”

Carina gasped, and both women fell silent for another short moment before my mate asked, “Wait, how old is he?”

I blinked. How is that relevant?

“I don’t know. He couldn’t have been too much older than us…” Serena explained, her voice trailing off.

The twin sisters seemed to have the same revelation that I had, because Serena blurted out, “If he’s our age, then there’s no way he could be the same alpha that fought against Alpha Rigel.”

“So his grandson?” Carina offered. “His views on our pack could be vastly different than that of his grandfather--just like yours!”

Othello puffed his chest out, proud of our mate for coming to a conclusion he continued to bring up. Mate’s right, Lucien. You can’t judge the new rogue alpha for the actions of the old one--that isn’t very kingly.

I stifled a scoff. My father would beg to differ.

Your father is a corrupt asshole, who only stopped putting his hands on our mother when he discovered you were old enough to overpower him, my wolf snarled, conjuring up images of my mother with her face purple and swollen. It was the worst of his beatings, and the last he ever dealt her--and me. He is a coward. He is unfit to lead--and now we have found our luna queen, a beauty inside and out who looks for the good in others just like Luna Queen Vanessa, and you want to dismiss her concerns in favor of the fears of a cowardly old fool?

Before I could retort, I heard Serena say, “I’m not sure if he knows who I am. Then again, I did tell him that I didn’t want to be an alpha like my grandfather, who ‘took the loss of his mate out on Dark Moon’. That and him running into me so close to our pack probably tipped him off.”

I blinked again. Was I hearing that right? Were the heirs to Starry Sky actually opposed to the actions taken by their grandfather? I had to admit, while I was a walking encyclopedia when it came to every alpha that had held the title within the past decade, I knew next to nothing about their predecessors, so I couldn’t conjure up any information on Alpha Rigel. According to my father, the old man was lauded as a war hero, but Chandler and a handful of elders would always cringe whenever the former alpha of Starry Sky was mentioned. Which meant there was more to this than I had been told.

“But you don’t know for sure?” challenged Carina.

“Of course not, I’m not a mind reader,” Serena clapped back.

Carina let out a frustrated groan. “Fine. When are you going to see him again?”

I almost had to strain to listen hear Serena’s whispers: “We made plans to meet tonight, but… It’s complicated.”

“I get it,” Carina said. I frowned. Did she? Because I’m not sure that I get it.

Which only goes to show what we both already knew--our mate is far too intelligent for you, so much so that her intelligence goes beyond books, Othello mused.

I couldn’t deny that. Carina definitely seemed to hold a level of emotional maturity that allowed her to empathize with others. She would have made a good luna to anyone, but she will be a fantastic queen.

“We can talk about it later if you want?” she offered. “When we aren’t supposed to go back to a super awkward meeting between our parents and my royal mate?”

I chuckled softly, catching the eye of Luna Celeste. While the others were laughing, deep in discussion about another alpha’s disastrous banquet, the luna was eyeing me suspiciously. I gulped--it was as if she knew that I was eavesdropping on her daughters.

“How are you doing with that, by the way?” I heard Serena ask, pulling me back to the conversation taking place down the hall.

“Honestly, after talking to you about your love life, I think mine will be a piece of cake,” my mate quipped.

“Gee, thanks,” her sister remarked unenthusiastically.

Carina snickered. “No, but seriously… I think I’m just worried about the future. Being mated to the future Alpha King makes me the next Luna Queen, and I can’t imagine the weight of such an honor, nor the responsibilities that come with it. I wouldn’t just be the luna of one single pack like I’ve been studying for--I’d be the luna of every pack. And then there’s my biology degree…”

This was before she had even mentioned higher education to me, so I had to clear my throat to cover up my reaction. My eyes widened, my face felt hot, and I ended up having to cover my smile.

And here you thought she would be some pampered princess, huffed Othello. Our mate has beauty and brains! She’s perfect!

My heart swelled with pride. She really is.

“I… I guess I have to drop out now, don’t I?” My mate’s solemn question wiped the smirk from my face. What? Why would she--?

Read the room, Lucien, my wolf sighed. You’re the future king, which makes our mate the future queen. She thinks she has to give up the life she had planned for you. Most lunas go through this when they find their alpha mate.

Since one hand was still covering my frown, so only one of my fists was clenching the arm of my chair so hard that my knuckles turned white. No. I refuse to be one of those self-centered alphas who demands that my mate fit into a box. I want Carina to have all the freedom she needs to live the life she desires. Her seeking an education beyond the norm is admirable. I am honored the moon goddess gave her to me.

“Cari, if you want to finish your degree, then finish it,” Serena told my mate, echoing my thoughts. “Hell, if you want to get your Masters, go for that, too! The prince should want you to accomplish all of your goals, and if he even dares to ask you to drop everything for him then he isn’t good enough for you.”

Carina let out a hapless laugh. “He wouldn’t be good enough? A prince?”

“No, he wouldn’t.”

A proud smile tugged at my mouth once more. Some might feel threatened or disheartened if their mate’s relative made such a declaration, but my heart warmed at the support system surrounding Carina. Her sister and parents would never make any arrangements or deals behind her back that would hinder her future plans, and they readily encourage her to reach her goals regardless of any obstacles. They were the kind of people I could only dream of meeting throughout my childhood.

☆ end of flashback ☆

Carina and her sister returned shortly after that, and our meeting continued pleasantly for over an hour before we all parted ways. I retired to my suite on the third floor--the zeta had insisted on putting me in one of the spare alpha suites on the top floor meant for visiting relatives and royalty, but I insisted on being placed on the same floor as my entourage. I told her it was for security reasons, but it just made things easier.

Chandler and Juno were right behind me as I entered my suite. Atlas and Elrond, my respective future gamma and zeta, were already waiting for me at the dining table with lunch. A steaming hunk of roast prime rib au jus sat on a cutting board, surrounded by bowls of potato and vegetable sides. Roasted asparagus and rosemary-seasoned diced potatoes, truffle fries, fresh spinach, diced pineapple chunks, and a bowl of blackberries and raspberries. Two bottles of wine, red and white, chilled in a bucket of ice on a cart beside the table.

I c****d an eye at the display. “I hope you didn’t put the omegas out by ordering this.”

Atlas laughed heartily, his cheeks rosy from the alcohol. I could only assume that the wine glass in his hand was his third or fourth. “Not at all--I barely stepped into the kitchen to ask for a menu when the head omega all but shoved me out the door, insisting she would personally oversee that we get the finest lunch she could put together. I didn’t see what it was until a few of her omegas brought this here.”

“And the warriors?” I asked.

“We made sure they were given the same treatment,” shared Elrond, his eyes never leaving his phone.

I nodded and took my seat at the head of the table. Juno took her place to my right, opposite of Atlas, and Chandler chose the seat beside her and opposite of Elrond. We immediately dug into the fine cuisine laid out before us; I hadn’t eaten since breakfast, and I was famished.

“So, what did you overhear?” asked Chandler just as I had taken a bite of prime rib.

Startled by his sudden question, I nearly choked on the meat. Thankfully, the meat was dislodged quickly, so my coughing fit was brief. “You knew?”

The older man tsked. “Young man, I have been overseeing your studies and training since you could walk. You think I can’t tell when you’re hiding something?”

He was right. All my life, Chandler had been there, filling the gap Fenrir couldn’t fill. Or wouldn’t. Either way, he was a fantastic man and my most supportive, trusted advisor, so it only made sense for me to choose him in place of the other candidates Fenrir had laid out for me.

With a sigh, I set down my utensils. “Atlas, Ron, are you both up to speed?”

The zeta nodded, while the gamma grinned. “That you found your fated mate? Not only did we hear about it, but since our future queen has left your meeting, I’ve had a small security detail on her. Don’t worry,” he assured me as I opened my mouth, meaning to protest. “As soon as they see an opening they will introduce themselves to her. Until then, they’re being discreet, and they’re under orders not to draw too much attention to Lady Carina, for her safety.”

I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding and clapped a hand down on his shoulder. “Thank you, my friend. If word gets out that she is to be queen, there’s no telling the kind of danger she would be in.”

“I’m assuming by ‘overhear’, Chandler means you were eavesdropping on the private conversation between your mate and her sister?” Juno asked, placing emphasis on the words ‘eavesdropping’ and ‘private’. When I nodded, she shook her head in disapproval, her auburn curls bouncing from the gesture. “Way to break her trust this early with those golden ears, Luci. You better make it up to her the first chance you get.”

“I will,” I sighed again. Then I jumped into my best reiteration of the conversation I heard between the daughters of the alpha of Starry Sky. I repeated their words verbatim, not pausing for any questions, and after a couple minutes I had relayed everything I had overheard. I picked up my fork and knife and began digging into my lunch, allowing my subordinates to stew in the new information.

“So let me get this straight,” Atlas began, his wine glass forgotten. “Your mate’s twin sister is the fated mate of the alpha of Dark Moon?”

“Allegedly,” I pointed out. “From what I could tell, Serena is only basing her theory on a coincidence.”

“Even so, this has to be investigated!” Juno clenched her fists, vibrating with rage. “What if he hurts Lady Serena? What if he uses her to get to Lady Carina?”

Atlas scoffed. “I wouldn’t underestimate Lady Serena. According to Beta Dione and Gamma Ravi, there’s a reason she was chosen to be the next alpha--and it’s not just because she shifted before her sister. She’s calculated, and she’s the youngest lieutenant in any pack army we’ve come across.”

“Some warriors asked around and found information on the sisters,” Elrond chimed in. “They’re both attending university and taking leadership courses; they’ve been taking alpha and luna lessons from their parents, take part in daily warrior training, and have been known to take part in community service efforts around the pack. The asylum program for omegas, rogues, and other non-wolf shifters was suggested by Lady Serena herself, though she cited Lady Carina as her inspiration for it.”

I couldn’t help the surge of pride I felt over my sweet mate’s influence. She was a truly remarkable person who positively affected those around her--everything a Luna Queen should be.

Atlas’ eyes glazed over; it was another moment before they returned to normal. “Just heard from Lady Carina’s security,” he grunted. “She and Lady Serena seem to be hosting a private meeting downstairs with a handful of warriors. They’re discussing a rendezvous tonight with Serena’s mate.”

I gripped the table, anger building deep within. “My mate wouldn’t seriously consider going, would she?”

My gamma cringed. “The detail we put on her has reported that she said, and I quote: ‘Like hell am I letting you meet that man alone in the woods at night, Rena!’”

“By the grace of the goddess…” My hand swiped over my face incredulously. “Who knew one little she-wolf could have so much fire?”

“I know I said you should come clean to her about eavesdropping,” Juno reminded me. “But what if we hold off on the ‘coming clean’ part for now? At least until Lady Serena introduces her mate to Starry Sky.”

“They might suspect us if that security detail introduces themselves too soon,” Elrond pointed out, to which Atlas waved off. “Nah, they haven’t had the chance yet--and they won’t. They’ve been keeping their distance until Lucien and Lady Carina announce their mate bond to Starry Sky.”

Juno’s chocolate eyes brightened. “That’s it! If you and Lady Carina make the announcement at the dinner tonight, then you can tell her in front of her parents that you’ll place a security detail on her starting the following morning for her safety as the future queen. She won’t be able to refuse, but she also will have the freedom to leave with Serena tonight.”

My blood was boiling so high, I thought steam might have blown out of both of my ears. “And why the hell would I want her out there with ‘that man’?”

“For starters, she’ll be with Lady Serena--” Juno began.

“Oh, and apparently, all the warriors they gathered for their little secret meeting will be going with them,” Atlas revealed.

“Even better!” My beta exclaimed. “And obviously, we’re not letting them go alone. Atlas will take a couple warriors and keep watch--if anything goes south, he’ll have Lady Carina brought to safety.”

Atlas frowned. “I mean, I can do all that. Would have appreciated if you asked, though.”

Juno rolled her eyes, any further points forgotten. “You say that like you weren’t going to either volunteer to be there, or ignore us and follow your future luna anyway. What, you got something better to do? And please don’t tell me you planned on plowing your way through some of the single, unmated she-wolves,” she shuddered in disgust.

He scoffed. “Who, me? The chastest of us all?”

“Not a real word,” Elrond reminded him.

“Even so, they’ll carve it on my headstone,” Atlas placed a hand on his chest and stared off into space wistfully.

Juno locked eyes with me, her hardened expression not diminishing the sparkle in her eyes. “Permission to shove my plate of food into his face?”

“Permission denied. Don’t waste food,” I sighed. I knew what they were doing; I had known Juno and Atlas nearly all my life, and they never failed to quell my rage with their ridiculous antics. “I suppose I can relax a little if Atlas is there. Thank you for volunteering your time, old friend.”

Atlas pouted. “But there’s this one female I was going to try to meet! Check this, she’s into--”

“If you value your life, you will not finish that sentence, Atlas!” Juno shouted.

As my friends bickered, I resumed eating my lunch, my thoughts wandering to a particular she-wolf with large green eyes and thick black curls. What was going through her head at that moment?