Maddy's Remix

I never thought I'd willingly risk my own life for someone else. I had always considered myself to be a rather selfish person, and openly so. I also never thought I'd regret dying the way I was, not because the person I was sacrificing myself for wasn't worth it, but because I knew that my death would devastate more than just said person and my parents. I didn't want them to suffer. It was the reason I was here in the first place. Quite a predicament. I'd also believed that I would be alone for the rest of my human life, that I'd long for someone to understand me but be unwilling to get to know anyone long enough to find out. I had always liked being alone, despite being a twin. It was a new experience and not entirely unwelcome but I had been used to my previous life of solitude, the life where I had been a younger sister by two years rather than an older twin by six minutes, the life that held my new one as nothing more than the partial dream and imagination of a young female author. I regret the idea that my actions would keep me from being with the first person I loved and the first person that loved me wholly in return, that I would hurt him with my actions and possible death because I knew it would destroy him. It wasn't a question of being self centered, it was just a well known fact, but at the same time I wasn't afraid, despite the mortal danger I was in. I had hope and more than enough knowledge and deductive reasoning to believe I would make it out of this alive, just not entirely unharmed. I had hope, something I'd never thought I'd hear myself say, much less think and feel. I was never one for fanciful, pointless thoughts, possibilities, yet I was feeling it now, feeling it wholeheartedly. It helped that I knew the one in front of me would be torn to pieces whether I die or not, but I believed I would be saved on time, saved and saving my twin from the pain I felt and the terror she would have felt in the situation. Of course, having a vision of my ultimate rescue and recovery was also rather reassuring, so yeah, I had some hope that I would make it out of this alive. That he would come for me. That he would save me. I knew he was a better person than he thought he was. I knew he had more control than he thought he did and that he would be the one to help me. It's why I wasn't terrified at the moment, why despite the blood red eyes watching me, why how he stalked slowly towards me like a predator would to his prey didn't frighten me, why his feral grin didn't make me think my life was over. No, I knew that it was just the beginning. Madeleine Hannah Swan had no idea why she was reborn as Bella's older twin sister. She had never particularly wished to be apart of this book, whether to replace Bella or add herself in it. She never really had a crush on Edward or fangirl'ed over Jacob. Sure she was a fan of the books back in middle school, but her love and enthusiasm quickly withered when the movies came out and its popularity went way out of proportion. She thought it was ridiculous, Team Edward and Team Jacob? Screw that, she'd rather claim complete dislike of the entire franchise rather than be lumped in with those psychotic people that called themselves Twilight fans. At first it was pretty cool being smarter than everyone else even if at the time she didn't know why. Of course she wasn't born with the knowledge of a seventeen year old right off the bat. The knowledge integrated itself gradually, or all of a sudden sometimes. As a kid she knew she was different from others her age group and she struggled to act like they would, but she still came off as smarter and more mature. Hey, sometimes acting like a kid pissed her off and some of her 'mature teenage sarcasm' would slip. It got easier the older she got and the more she remembered, but it was still hard, especially when she found she had the same powers as Alice. Hell, she never asked to be able to see the future. Sure she thought it was cool and she, like she assumed most people did, wondered what it'd be like to have the power, but she never openly wished for it. Maddy knew it'd be more of a pain than anything, granted she considered most things a pain or a hassle in her past life. Maddy was glad that she grew out of her similar appearance to Bella, not wanting to look like her. It's not like Bella was hideous, in fact she was rather pretty, not that Bella thought so, but Maddy wanted to have some individualism, to not be seen as Bella's twin and instead just her sister. A sister could be seen as herself, but a twin was always seen as an add on, something that came with the package and while being a twin sometimes had its advantages overall, Maddy preferred being seen as an individual, something she had no trouble with when they got older, when they became the age that Maddy had died at in her old life. Seventeen. While Bella was of average height and weight, Maddy found herself being similar in stature to how Alice was explained, petite; thin, short, but still held the delicate curves that identified her as a female. Overall she was pixie like. Now, Maddy hadn't wanted to look like Alice really, though she admitted she was cute, she was relieved when her honey brown hair(not quite brunette but not quite blond), lightly tanned skin, and forest green eyes were different from both Bella and what she knew Alice looked like. She did, however, also have a short haircut, not because she wanted to be like Alice, but because she had always preferred her hair like that. It was just coincidence. Maddy was pretty happy when she found out she had ramrod straight hair unlike her frizzy hair of her past life because now she could get her hair cut shorter than before without having to worry about getting an afro, so she did. Get her hair cut short, of course. Her straight honey brown hair came across with strong feminine lines that were clipped and structured into a substantial top that blanketed over her left eye and connected with the influence on the side. The other side was styled behind the ear while extending gravity to the hair above. Maddy was extremely happy with her haircut and kept it that way, never letting it grow out anymore. It was so easy to style in the morning and washing it was ridiculously quick and easy as well. Fabulous and easy to manage, just the way she liked it. She had also kept many aspects of her past life with her into this one, further separating her from Bella. While Bella was school smart and logical but unimaginative and uncoordinated, Maddy was more physically fit and creative, but was weak in things like science and math. While Maddy wasn't as obsessed with fashion and make up as Alice or Rosalie, she did have a great fashion sense and liked to wear fantastic clothes, making her seem like a fashionista in comparison to her sister Bella. The only similarities they seemed to share was their dislike of attention and their apathetic attitude towards make up. Bella wore no make up at all and Maddy only occasionally wore mascara, eye liner, and chap stick that doubled as lip gloss, bothering with no more than that since it was a pain to take off. Maddy, despite her small dislike of Bella in her previous life, grew attached to her new sister. Obviously, it was rather difficult to hold any negative feelings towards your younger twin sister, but that didn't mean she spent every waking moment with Bella. It would be obvious that Maddy was independent starting at a young age. She had quickly started to save up money, doing chores and odd jobs like pet sitting and helping clean for her neighbors, young and elderly, and also earned money recycling. Renee just thought it was cute and let her do it and since Maddy was the one collecting the money Renee was never surprised with just how much her little girl was making since Maddy usually just replied with 'a lot' rather than telling her the exact amount of money she earned. After all pet-sitting jobs paid well even if it's just a few hours, the minimum she'd earned on them being ten bucks for an hour, though she got more when she helped elderly neighbors with her chores, since they thought she was cute and doted on her. In the end it helped transition her into a part time job at a pet store and steadily earning enough money to buy her own wardrobe and fill her bookcase until it seemed ready to burst at the seams, which Maddy was happy about since her fashion sense would have broken Renee's wallet, especially when she bought goth outfits. Those things were expensive. It also helped her pay for her car, a black Volkswagen bug, her baby, though it stayed in Forks with Charlie. Another difference from Bella. While Bella hated Forks and awkward summers with Charlie, Maddy loved them, preferring the clouds and rain and greenery to the dry heat, the sun, and desert of Phoenix. She had continued spending the summer there even after Bella had put her foot down at fourteen and decided to stop going entirely, a small change to the book when a compromise was made and Charlie and Bella went to southern California for two weeks, not that Maddy cared. It didn't seem to hurt anything. Renee still met Phil and Bella still planned to go to Forks with her twin in 'exile' to give the couple space. Maddy had thought her similarities in abilities and appearance to Alice made her presence there unnecessary. It was a message saying that the plot, the story line, would happen with or without her presence there. And Maddy was fine with that. She didn't feel excluded because she didn't believe herself a part of it to begin with. Immortality as a vampire, while alluring, was easily deterred in her mind when she thought of the Volturi and how they'd love to make a puppet out of her so she contented herself with living a more or less human life, one that she'd be much more comfortable in, economic wise, than in her past one and that alone was something she was pretty happy about. That's right, she was okay with being an extra that went on to live her own life. Not that she didn't like excitement and danger, but smooth sailing was just comfortable...at least that's what she thought she'd be doing, until she got some very interesting visions the moment Bella decided to move to Forks. 1. FIRST SIGHT Renee was driving Bella and I to the airport with the windows rolled down. My clothes were amazingly casual compared to the goth outfits I tended to wear. I wore a red and black striped printed envelope neck top, 1969 curvy skinny indigo rinse jeans and black Ash Boogy sneaker wedges. My navy wool moto jacket was sitting in the seat next to me, neatly folded and waiting for me to put it on. Bella was wearing exactly what the book said she would wear today and exactly what I had seen in a passing vision, a sleeveless, white eyelet lace shirt, her carry on item being a parka. I realized that this meant that Bella was no doubt thinking about her self-imposed exile to Forks, but couldn't bring myself to care. I was ecstatic to be moving to Forks with any sense of permanence, not just because I loved it there and held a distaste for Phoenix, but because I couldn't help but look forward to experiencing what I'd seen in my visions the minute that Bella resolutely decided to move. I had thought I wasn't necessary, that I wasn't needed for the story to go like before, but I was wrong. The visions proved that. There was no Alice. The fact shocked me when I realized it. At first I didn't realize since the clearest vision I had was Bella and Edward together...and me and Jasper together, both human with vampire. It shocked the heck out of me at first and I tried concentrating on the Cullens to see if I could find Alice, but no cigar. Alice just wasn't there, she didn't exist. It hit me hard when I realized that I was the 'Alice' of this wacked up alternate Twilight universe. Later it confused me as to why I could even see the Cullens at all since I blatantly remembered that Alice wasn't supposed to be able to see visions of things she'd never been before like half vampires and shape shifters, but I was able to see the Cullens just fine despite my obvious non-vampirism. Sure their images were kind of blurry, like looking through a screen, but I could still see them, unlike the blanks in my vision I assumed was time spent at the Reservation with Jacob or other werewolves. Later I had a vision of Bella and I as vampires together with Edward and Jasper and I figured that I could kind of see them since I was going to be one and left it at that since thinking too hard on it gave me a headache. At first I had kind of flipped about being some kind of replacement for Alice in this world and I confused and frustrated myself with questions of why Jasper was a Cullen when Alice was the one who brought him to them in the books, but after a short lived identity crisis and some silent panicking, I decided it would do no good freaking out about it. Being Alice's replacement wouldn't change and it didn't change who I was in the least. I also chose not to feel any sense of responsibility over it, knowing it would only make me feel pressured. I just decided to do what I do best, go with the flow, and figure things out as they come. So yeah, I was pretty excited about moving to Forks. I mean, who wouldn't look forward to finding out if Jasper was your soul-mate? I'd always preferred Jasper anyways. I'd never had a crush on Edward or Jacob or even Carlisle. Edward was too mopey for me and Jacob too immature. Carlisle was too fatherly and let's not even mention Emmett. I liked Jasper because unlike the rest of the Cullens, he wasn't 'innocent'. He had feasted on human blood, countless times, and had torn apart vampires with savage skill and precision, yet he consciously made the choice to turn over a new leaf and live a 'vegetarian' lifestyle. That, more than anything, spoke to me of how amazing a person he was, despite his probably not thinking so, something I was planning on changing if Jasper and I really were compatible. "Bella, Maddy," Renee shook me from my musings. "You don't have to do this." What was this? The twentieth time she'd asked that? I wondered. Bella was probably having that internal panic attack about leaving their air headed mother alone, temporarily forgetting all about Phil. Nice guy, but kind of boring. He'd never make it past the minor leagues. "I want to go," Bella lied. The book really wasn't exaggerating when it said Bella was a horrible liar. I'd learned that early on. At least she sounded a little convincing this time, though that probably had to do with the fact that she'd been saying it so often recently. "Yeah, who wants to hear you and Phil get busy at night while Bella and I pretend we're deaf?" I joked, trying to lighten the mood...and succeeding. Renee laughed a little while Bella just sent me a scolding look. Yeah I was the older by ten minutes, but Bella was the supposedly more mature one. I just shrugged off the look. It's never worked before. "Tell Charlie I said hi." "We will," we said in unison, making me grin and making Bella's eyes twinkle in amusement. I remember how I insisted on practicing trying to speak at the same time when we were younger, when we looked more alike. I wanted to do it to freak people out or make them 'aw' at us. I don't know how I convinced her but I did and I was able to get what I wanted that much more and now it's second nature to us. Heck yeah, cool twins. "I'll see you two soon," she insisted. "You two can come home whenever you want- I'll come right back as soon as you guys need me." It was obvious that it would be a hard promise to keep, one that involved sacrifice on her part. "Don't worry about us," Bella urged and I was quick to back her up and reassure them both. "Yeah, we're gonna be really happy there. Both of us," I said in an almost hard tone, completely self assured, and they both looked at me a little surprised before realization, understanding, and finally relief passed through their expressive eyes. They may not know that I can see the future, but I led them to believe I had some kind of super 'sixth sense', one that gave me 'feelings' that involved avoiding danger, getting lucky, and other things as mundane as the weather. They learned early on that I was freakishly accurate and accepted some things I said as fact, especially when I used a certain tone of voice to say them, one that spoke of total confidence and seriousness like just now. It was pretty useful. "We love you, Mom," Bella said as they hugged before they let go and it was my turn, then we got on the plane, and she was gone. The four hour flight from Phoenix and Seattle and the hour flight in a small Plane to Port Angeles was more tedious than I'd expected. I was so geared up for just seeing the Cullens for the first time that the time from now to then seemed agonizingly slow. Even Bella seemed annoyed at my more pronounced twitching and fidgeting. I hoped that the hour ride with Charlie and Bella would sufficiently distract me until we got home and I could distract and exhaust myself with unpacking and settling and dinner. I was currently thinking on what outfit I was going to wear for the first day when we arrived at Port Angeles. It was raining of course, just like the book said and just like the vision I had. It was pretty weird and trippy to see a future I already knew about, but I figured that it was going to continue being like that until the end of Breaking Dawn when I finally wouldn't know what the hell was going on except for whatever my visions showed me so I decided to just get used to it. Charlie was, obviously, waiting with the cruiser and I was seriously hoping our luggage would fit and that I'd still have enough room to sit in the back. Unlike Bella, I thought it was pretty cool that Charlie was the chief of Police. It was a great way to get would be suitors to back off. My dad is a police chief is a very effective way to get guys to leave you alone. Of course actually riding in one was a bummer since it slowed down traffic a lot. Charlie gave Bella an awkward, one armed hug after I kept Bella from stumbling as soon as she got off the plane. I swear half of my visions since I was born have been of Bella getting into some kind of accident and I'd been able to stop half of that half, considering the other half I wasn't in the vicinity to stop her from somehow getting herself hurt. "It's good to see you Bells," he said as he automatically caught and steadied her when she stumbled again. "You haven't changed much." He turned to me and his smile turned less awkward and more familiar. "It's good to see you too, Maddy," we hugged too, but it was much less awkward, which was a given as Charlie had more practice being a dad with me. He really liked that I used him to keep away the boys and that I was able to make things comfortable without having to talk. Bella couldn't do that because she was too much like Charlie. "How's Renee?" "Mom's fine. It's good to see you too, Dad," Bella answered. "Ditto," I said with a grin. Bella only had a few bags. Most of her clothes weren't Forks wearable and her and Renee had pooled their resources to get her a scanty winter wardrobe. I insisted on helping with my own money but both had refused, especially Bella, both knowing I'd buy only expensive clothes for her and Renee didn't want me to waste money while Bella didn't want me to waste money buying her fancy clothes. I did anyway, just not a lot, just a few sweaters and warm shirts and they were less expensive and showy than the clothes I usually bought which Bella appreciated but still scolded me for wasting money on her. I rolled my eyes at her of course. I, on the other hand, had more than a few bags that would not easily all fit in the trunk. I was only grateful that half my clothes were already waiting in my room in Forks since the other half had trouble fitting without taking up my seat. And this is after I went through my clothes and donated all the stuff that I didn't want or didn't fit me anymore... "I found a good car for you, Bella, really cheap," he announced when we were strapped in. "What kind of car?" Bella said suspiciously. She had every reason to be, I thought as I remembered just the kind of monstrosity waiting in the driveway of our house. "Well, it's a truck actually, a Chevy." Oh, here we go. "Where did you find it?" Bella questioned. "Do you remember Billy Black down at La Push?" Ah, Billy. We got into the habit of flirting with each other as a joke when I hit puberty. We both found it funny how flustered Charlie got sometimes and how embarrassed Jacob became. "No." "Yes," I said at the same time she spoke. Charlie sent me an amused glance through the mirror while Bella just sent me a look that said 'not helping.' I just smiled at her. "He used to go fishing with us during the summer," Charlie prompted. Correction, he still does, Bella just doesn't go anymore and neither do I actually. I spent time with Jacob and the Clearwater siblings instead. "He's in a wheelchair now," Charlie continued when Bella didn't respond, "so he can't drive anymore and he offered to sell me his truck cheap." "What year is it?" I bit the inside of my cheek to keep from laughing at Charlie's expression. He should have expected that question. "Well, Billy's done a lot of work on the engine-" actually I was pretty sure it was mostly Jacob, talented little punk, "it's only a few years old, really." Of course Bella wasn't about to give up. Stubborn. "When did he buy it?" "He bought it in 1984, I think." "Did he buy it new?" "Well, no. I think it was new in the early sixties- or late fifties at earliest," he admitted sheepishly, making me snicker under my breath and this time it was his turn to give me a look, one that I ignored, looking innocently out the window as if I hadn't made a sound. "Ch- Dad, I don't really know anything about cars. I wouldn't be able to fix it if anything went wrong and I couldn't afford a mechanic..." "Really, Bella, the thing runs great. They don't build them like that anymore." I resisted the urge to scoff. If by run great he means roars like the coming of Armageddon then yeah it runs perfectly. "How cheap is cheap?" I sighed. Bella could never just leave things be. She couldn't just say thanks and move on? No, no she couldn't. "Well, honey, I kind of already bought it for you. As a homecoming gift." Charlie peeked sideways at her with a hopeful expression and before she could say what I knew she was about to say, I reached around the seat and pinched her side(I was sitting behind her.) Used to me doing so randomly, rather than jump and say 'ouch' she just turned to me with a light glare which I sent back warningly, telling her to think twice about what she was going to say. I understood her wish to feel independent and unreliant on Charlie, I really did, but there was that and there was just being plain ungrateful. It was one of the reasons I started to dislike Bella in the book, she didn't know where to draw that line. "That's really nice, Dad. Thanks, I really appreciate it." She turned to me with a 'you happy now?' expression, one that I nodded at in satisfaction. It wasn't great but it was better than her telling Charlie he didn't need to do it and hurt his feelings. "Well, now, you're welcome," he mumbled, embarrassed by her thanks, which made me smile. They exchanged a few more comments about the weather, something I contributed to a little before we descended into a comfortable silence, one that would have felt awkward if it was only Bella and Charlie around, but me being there eased the tension, not just because I was a third person, but because both of them were comfortable and familiar with me. Eventually we made it to Charlie's. A difference from the book and here was that the house Charlie had moved into with Renee was bigger. Rather than a two bedroom, one bathroom, it was a three bedroom, two bathroom. I assumed it was to accommodate my coming even before Bella and I were born so I didn't overly mind the discrepancy and I doubted it'd have any major effect on the basic plot. I took the opportunity that Bella's sincere enthusiasm over her new-to-her car presented to unpack my luggage in solitude. I knew it would only take Bella one trip to get her luggage upstairs and I wanted to give her and Charlie more time together as I wanted them to get used to each other fast so the awkwardness around the two would go away more quickly. Charlie already knew my habits so he wasn't really bummed or insulted when I ghosted away from them and holed myself up in my room to unpack without a word. The walls of my room were a navy blue with white trimming. White lace curtains hung at the window and the desk Charlie had moved in a few years back along with Bella's was where my playpen had been and the crib I had had been replaced with a twin bed that changed to a full sized bed when I had decided to keep coming when Bella had stopped. It was a birthday gift from Renee and Charlie when I had tactfully complained about almost rolling out of my bed early enough for them to arrange buying it for me. A canopy was added the next summer as a kind of father daughter project. It really didn't take that much effort. Charlie had gotten some thick, clean, sturdy rope and hung it on the ceiling above the bed while I got some black transparent, silky, fabric and sewed it a bit. Soon enough Charlie hung it up and I had a pretty canopy to match my relatively new bed. Charlie and I had offered to buy her a bigger bed and to make her a canopy during one of our summers together if she wanted, but she had refused saying that it would be pointless since she hardly went anymore and even if she did, she'd always been a minimalist so she was content with what she had. I shrugged at my thoughts, examining my large closet. Charlie had sold my old one when he saw it wouldn't be enough to house all my clothes and we collaborated to buy me a bigger one along with a big bookshelf since Charlie knew better than Renee my love of books. While my my bookshelf in Phoenix would overflow with my books, this one would be able to comfortably hold them all. The rocking chair that matched Bella's was resting on the wall next to the bookshelf and I avidly remembered summer days I spent reading on it. I turned to my desk to see the rather new model computer and printer on my desk, another collaboration between Charlie and I. I refused to put up with a slow computer and even less a slow internet connection so Charlie and I agreed to get a phone, TV, and internet package that I would pay during the summer and he would pay when I wasn't there. We decided to switch off every month now that I lived here. In the long run, though, it saved Charlie money and made him happy since the TV got a lot more sports channels now and his phone bills were cheaper. I'm sure Charlie was glad they had two bathrooms since it meant he didn't have to share with two teenage girls. I was pretty happy about it two even if it meant continuing to share a bathroom with Bella, I preferred not to make Charlie too uncomfortable. Bella was probably even more happy about the separate bathrooms than I was considering how much she was dreading this entire event. She was also probably enjoying the fact that Charlie doesn't hover like Renee did. He left us alone to do our own thing and trusted us not to do anything stupid. I was debating whether or not to comfort Bella tonight since I knew she would cry herself into a fitful sleep, but a vision decided for me. She would put on the happy facade even with me if I were to try and make her feel better since she knew I was looking forward to living here. I rolled my eyes at that as I started unpacking. "I swear, she's such a silent martyr," I muttered to myself as I got to work. It didn't take me long as I was used to packing and unpacking quickly and soon enough I had my clothes for my first day laid out on the rocking chair and my basket of bathroom necessities waiting for my morning shower. I made sure that my clothes wouldn't wrinkle during the night, looking them over once more before I went down to make dinner, knowing Bella would appreciate it. Hung across the chair's back was a black cotton shirt with long flowing sleeves with wide ends, fake leather applications, laced string detail, a swallowtail back, and drawstrings in the back for a fitted waist; it was called Severance. Resting on the seat of the chair was a skirt, the top part made from black crushed velvet and transitioning into multiple layers of voile and satin with a short front, long back, with the seams detailed with lace ruffles and satin ribbons; this was called Clairvoyant. At the feet of the chair were black suede Steve Madden