The Boys in the Woods

Festival of the Moon - Rose

I walk behind my mother and father as we make our journey across the river towards the Salumare pack. No doubt they’ve prepared a feast, decorated, made a spectacle of it all. There is nothing I hate more than these stupid festivals. We all sit there awkwardly, trying to take an interest when nobody really cares. None of us have addressed the idea that we’re going to a unified pack soon, and I think we’re all avoiding the conversation.

‘Pssst,’ I attempt to ignore the calls, as I’m fully aware of who’s calling.

‘Rosie?’ I walk off to the side and get closer to Mason.

‘Are you insane?’ I ask him knowing full well he doesn't care about what my father will say or do to him.

‘Hello Rose, how are you?’ He asks as if nothing is wrong.

‘If my father hears you, or worse sees us talking, we’ll both be in trouble, but you’ll-’ He interrupts me.

‘-end up dead, I’m aware.’ I hit him; he pretends it hurts.

‘You need to take him seriously. He’s not messing around when he says he will kill anyone who comes near me.’ One of the worst things my father ever did was protect me so much that it isolated me to a point where anyone weaker would be incredibly damaged. I'm, of course, incredibly strong because I have to be. Because of his harsh rhetoric, I had no friends; the only “friend” I had was Mason. He didn’t like Mason, and therefore he doesn’t know Mason and I are “friends.” If he ever found out, Mason wouldn’t be my friend because he’d likely be dead. Worse, if he found out Mason and I were much more than friends, he’d torture Mason before killing him in front of me. He’s lovely when he isn’t threatening you or attempting to kill you…

‘So I assume kissing you is out of the question?’ I want to kill him.

‘If you don’t shut up, I will kill you myself.’ He laughs.

‘Come on, Rosie, lighten up. I’ll teach you how to cook and clean.’ I laugh as quietly as possible as I hit him again. 

We both end up walking into my father. He’s built like a mountain, tall and wide, muscles like mountain peaks - the tall scary kind - and we both gulp in unison.

‘Daddy, I was just telling Mason that-’ He interrupts me because it appears all the men in my life hate when I speak in full sentences.

‘Mason,’ he spoke with words that could freeze a lake; they were so cold.

‘Sir’ He was panicking but playing it very cool.

‘You know I don’t like you, Mason?’ Straight to the point, that's my father for you.

‘Yes, sir, you tell me every day when I walk past you and say hello.’ Why couldn’t Mason just say yes? Why did he need to add in all the extra words?

‘So you decide to make me like you even less-’ Mason interrupts my father because he's brave when he shouldn't be.

‘That’s possible?’ For the love of the gods, shut up, you i***t!

‘You’re lucky that my wife has forbidden the shedding of blood on my formal cloak, or else you’d be dead right where you stand.’ Not an empty threat.

‘Daddy, please-’ I beg him to leave Mason alone without making it a statement.

‘Rose, what have I said about speaking when you’re not spoken to?’ There it is. A woman's place is to answer men when they ask something of you.

‘Sorry, father.’ I wish I could kill him sometimes. I understand that he grew up a certain way, and therefore he’s locked into the mindset of women have their place, but he didn’t even make an effort to change the status quo.

‘Mason, I suggest you fall back and remain silent for the rest of the evening.’ He was measured in his tone, displaying little to no emotion throughout the entire conversation.

‘Yes, sir.’ Mason listens and begins to leave.

‘Better yet, never talk to Rose again, or I will follow through on what was a brush with death.’ He adds as Mason turns back to hear his threat.

My father turns and walks back to the front and calls for me. I walk away as Mason walks to the back, looking at me as he walks. If it was up to my father, he’d say these very words to Crispen. Maybe that’s why he is so hard on Mason; he is doing what he’s unable to do to Crispen to him.

-

As we cross the river and make our way through the homes towards the village center, it’s everything I expected. Lavished and bright, smiling faces that are worn under duress. Our packs don’t like one another. It’s not something a marriage alone will fix. My father greets Merrick, my mother greets Astrid, and I walk towards Crispen.

‘Crispen, it’s lovely to see you again.’ He smiles. He’s charming as ever, taking my hand in his and kissing before he kisses my cheek. He whispers in my ear before moving away, ‘are you ready for another night of bullshitting for an audience?’ I laugh a little. Crispen was like me; he hated these things. We always used to moan about them when we were children, which I guess we still are, although sometimes it’s easy to forget. We both sit next to each other, in the center, on display. Our fathers sit next to us, and our mothers next to them. We’re treated like the very enemies we fought for centuries, kings and queens. A product of the world we came into. This wasn’t always how it was. Centuries ago, we were all the same. There was no ranking or hierarchy. Being an alpha didn’t mean you were treated as something more substantial. As time went by, power became enticing. That’s why so many started a pack of their own after being banished to feel powerful. The problematic aspect of it all was that power transferred through bloodlines; it became a birthright. It wasn’t about who deserved to be alpha. It became about lineage; we used to fight monarchies; when did we become one?

‘Welcome to our brothers and sisters from across the river,’ Merrick was starting his speech. My father will interrupt him when he sees fit. They love to one-up each other. It was never in good spirits, however. We may have grown closer than we once were, but there was still a deep and bitter rivalry. ‘Every year, we gather together for a single night of drinking, eating, singing, and dancing to celebrate the festival of the moon.’ My father was stoic and didn’t move or make any facial expressions whatsoever. ‘It is a time when we reflect on not what divides us, but what brings us together, Custodes-’ everyone raises a glass and repeats the word ‘custodes.’

‘Centuries before we, or our parents, and possibly grandparents existed, the Guardians granted the natives of this land the power. A power so incredible it would exist for eternity. The ability to become a mighty wolf, to protect and preserve nature and all that it inhabits.’ He bows his head, as he does every year when he gets to this specific part. ‘Unfortunately, humans grew stronger, aided by human-made creatures of war. Now the guardians are no more, and Initium. A once-powerful wolf colony, the birthplace of the wolves, lost to the desert. The festival of the moon is a sacred event where we honor the ones who came before us. As well as to celebrate the many that will follow on from us.’ Merrick looks at Crispen and me. Crispen grabs my hand and smiles. In turn, we end up looking at one another. In the crowd, I see Mason looking at me. He’s unhappy. He knows this is all for show, but eventually, it will be a very visceral reality. We couldn’t outrun fate. ‘So let us all raise our glasses to the future, to Crispen and Rose.’ Everyone chants our names, and that uncomfortable feeling manifests itself in my stomach. Mason downs his drink before walking away. I wish he was sitting next to me right now.

My father standing interrupts my wish, and instead, the forest goes silent. ‘I’d like to thank Merrick and his pack for allowing us here this evening. Every year we look forward to sharing our evening with you on this important day.’ Lies. ‘I echo the respects to our ancestors and to the future of our people. The day is soon approaching when we will no longer be separated from one another. While none of us truly understand what that looks like, and some of us have yet to accept such a fate, we know it is imminent. Tonight let us enjoy the company of one another, celebrate what might be a prosperous future that sees our expansion filled with new life and opportunities. Let us also never forget what we’re up against.’ My father ominously looks towards Crispen. ‘The first alpha of our united packs will see the most significant battle in our history unfold. I wish him luck and offer guidance alongside Merrick to secure a victory for us all. To the future.’ Once again, everyone chants the last few words of the leader and drinks. Wolves or sheep, I’m unsure. 

Merrick proceeds to invite everyone to eat, drink, and enjoy. Nobody wastes any time. Our food is brought to us because we’re to remain seated. We get to watch others enjoy themselves instead of doing it ourselves. I look at Crispen, ‘so how long do you think it will be until our fathers are at one another’s throats?’ 

‘Two drinks, three tops,’ he laughs, but we both know it’s true. ‘So this is the last time we’re doing this as two single wolves.’

‘Yeah, I guess it is.’

‘Nervous?’ He asks so casually.

‘Yes, of course, I am. I’m getting married, and then we’re going to war. It’s rather nerve-racking.’

‘Thank god, I was hoping you’d say that.’

‘Not going to act like a big strong man and say you’re not afraid of anything?’

‘I think I can be a man and admit I’m afraid. The two don’t have to be mutually exclusive.’

‘That’s what I like about you, Crispen; you’re honest.’

‘Someone's got to be around here. Well, I guess that's not exactly fair... I'm only honest with you, and Nikolas obviously.’ I follow his gaze and see Nikolas stuffing his face next to a girl with hair tied up with a braid on each side. ‘Is that his girlfriend?’

‘Ha! He wishes. He’s trying to woo her.’

I look again and see how messy of an eater he is. ‘I see. He does realize that he isn’t a wolf right now and doesn’t need to eat like one, right?’

‘Oh please, wolves are much neater when they eat, don’t compare the two.’ We both laugh at our words and Nikolas’s actions. I enjoyed Crispen’s presence. I just wish we didn’t have to be married for it to continue this way. In the years I’d known Crispen, we’d never spent a single day together, alone. I wonder if maybe we need to change that.