Guilty Souls

BROKEN PROMISE

CHAPTER 2

The next day...

Azalea woke up in her room after a long disturbed sleep. She was given a shot to help her calm down. She collapsed when she heard the shattering news. Even though the medicine was designed to put her in complete rest, she remained restless through the night.

When she revived her senses, the lone sound she heard was the low-blowing noise emitted by the split-type air conditioning unit placed on top of her window frame. The quietness of her room would allow her to hear even the drop of a needle on the floor. So calm,  so quiet, and peaceful. It was the exact opposite of her state of mind at the moment. Her mind was in turmoil --it was in a whirl. 

She wanted to scream and squeezed every air in her lungs to help her wake her up from the horrifying nightmare. The truth squeezed her heart so painfully, and she wanted it to stop.

Her mind refused to face the harsh reality, but she didn't have a choice.

She wanted to blame Nimuel for not thinking about her and their future. He and his  BROKEN solemn promise. He left without telling her anything. She wasn’t even given a chance to talk to him for the last time.

To follow the tradition, they couldn't see each other the day before their wedding. Azalea thought Nimuel was at home and preparing for their wedding just like her. She never thought he would take a dangerous assignment without telling her.

Nimuel was given a month’s leave of absence from his duty. He promised her a month by themselves --a whole month of his life dedicated to her. Unfortunately, now she was ALONE—alone with a broken heart.

As if her soul escaped her numb body, she was like floating on air...lifeless.

The tears swelled in her eyes and cascaded on her cheeks, dumping her pillows. If her tears could bring back Nimuel, she would be willing to cry for him every minute of the day. She'd be willing to do anything and everything to spend a few more moments with him. However, no matter how she cried, it would never bring back the man she loved. He was gone for good, taken from her in the most painful way and on the supposedly most memorable day in their life.

She tossed and turned in her bed while trying to remember how the two of them met.

Who wouldn’t be captivated by a man in uniform? 

Nimuel was a devastatingly handsome man in uniform. --always standing straight in an assertive posture, chin up, chest out, shoulders back, and stomach in. Nimuel's almost six-foot height towered most men, and his firm muscles in all the right places were as if sculpted by Gods, layered by bronze skin. His deep bottomless black eyes seemed like two black buttons shielded by thick black eyelashes under thick black eyebrows. His military crew cut hair added to his awesome and mystifying appeal. In short, he was a breathtaking man in uniform. Very distinguished and very manly.

She scoffed while thinking about a man in uniform...an officer and a gentleman...a bitter smile curved her lips.

Nimuel wasn't a gentleman when they first met. He might be in uniform but definitely not a gentleman. He approached her so confident of himself and carrying a deadly million-dollar smile on his face. He didn't even say Hi or Hello as an appropriate greeting of an ordinary man. Instead, he lowered his head and gave her a burning kiss. 

That burning kiss shook her 20-year body while thousands of electrifying sensations spread through it at a rapid pace. It disturbed her mind and left her body with a tingling awareness she never felt in her entire life. He was a good kisser, a hells-fire kisser.

Nimuel followed the kiss by saying, “You’re mine!” Come forth a smile that captivated and imprisoned her heart from the very first day they met. He was so sure of himself. Falling in love with him was never hard. 

She was instantly enchanted. She wasn't able to protest when he brusquely took a kiss and bluntly stated ownership of her.  Her chest heaved heavily as if the air was restricted in her space and her heart pounded strongly inside her chest. He was so damn right; she validated his claim --he owned her.

She smiled bitterly. Nimuel definitely conquered her aloof, cold, and strong-willed self. He made her discover the fire hidden in the deepest part of her.

However, despite his hot and passionate kisses, which sent them to the boundary of absolute unison, no matter how their sanity was pushed to the edge, he always stopped before their bodies became one. The last and final step of inserting himself to her heated and wet core and almost losing their minds as they did their make-outs-- Nimuel always stopped making them as one. 

He was foolish, she thought. The final step to totally attaining their abyss, he always stopped at the last minute because he wanted her purity as a gift on their wedding night.

Azalea wished Nimuel had been less cautious and principled. She wished she had experienced total ecstasy in his arms. She would never regret submitting herself to him. If he just did it with her, perhaps she wouldn't be left out and wondering how it was to be loved by him completely.

“You're such a FOOL Nimuel! You’re a total freak! Now you left me. How could  you expect me to live normally without you?” Tears welled in her eyes again. His loss was too painful. Her heart was breaking into bits and pieces.

Even the soft knock on the door was not enough to make her stop crying. Nobody would've expected her to feel well anyway. There was no need to conceal how much she was tearing apart. Nimuel's death was too sudden, so unexpected, and so heartbreaking.

“Azah! Honey?” Her mom was in tears just like she was. She pulled Azalea into a gentle hug and tapped her back. Azalea turned to her Mom and hugged her tightly. She poured in her troubled heart at the arms of her mother. “You’ll get through this stage, Honey! You are still young. He died a hero, Azalea!” Her Mom's gentle voice slightly calmed her down.

“Oh, Mom! I love him so much.”  She sobbed and paused. "It was so unfair." and welled more tears. What else could she say? She was bound to be his wife; thus, she had chosen him to be the only man in her life.

Next to her mom, her best friend Bella, her father, and her brother went inside the room. They were there to assure her she wouldn’t go through the pain alone. She could draw strength from them.

How hard was it to forget someone that you love so dearly? How long would it take her to forget?

A week later, they attended the necrological service for Nimuel. It was the next painful experience for Azalea. Seeing him lying in a casket... lifeless. 

The messages of the people who loved him and whom he touched were heartbreaking. For someone so young, it was unfair that God had taken his life away so prematurely.

No one expected Azalea to have the guts to say her last words for him in front of all the people inside the chapel. In fact, she also didn't expect that she could be that strong to let out the message from her heart for everyone to hear.

When she stood in front of the altar, with the corpse of Nimuel on the side, all eyes were checking on her at that moment. She grabbed the microphone with a trembling hand that her brother handed her as he stood by her side to support her.

She heaved a heavy breath as she mumbled shakily, "The last year of my life was the best. I thought it was just the beginning..." She breathed out heavy air from her lungs before continuing, "But even though it was short, I was still honored to have met him. I am glad that I was given even just a year to get to know him better," she took a step forward near the coffin, gazed at his face, and said. "And for that, I thank you, Nimuel. You will forever have a space in my heart."

The mother and father of Nimuel came to her after she delivered her message. They knew how hard it was for her, but they understood she was too young to bury herself from longing. 

Next, it was Johnny's turn to console her. "Live Azah! Nimuel will never wish for you to bury yourself with him. Remember that will you?" He tapped her back.

Azalea smiled at him. Was she looking so desperate? No matter how painful it was at the moment, she knew she'd recover in time...she just needed time. She would never burden the soul of Nimuel to worry about her.

The family of Nimuel decided not to have a long wake for him. It was for the best, as every time they looked at him inside that casket, they felt more pain.

The military burial would be held two days after his necrological service. They wanted to let Nimuel's soul rest in peace.