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Congratulations! This letter certifies that the artifact now in your possession is one hundred percent authentic, as advertised. I acknowledge that some explanation is in order regarding the circumstances by which it came into my possession. I do realize that this is a peculiar story, but I hope that this information satisfies your curiosity and reassures your confidence in this purchase. Your trust matters to me. This is the real deal, maybe even the ultimate collector’s item (as the market for such things seems to go these days). Please note that I had this document notarized by Mr. Howard Mooers, a notary public in the state of Idaho.
On the afternoon of November 6th, 1973, the rock musician Frank Zappa entered the Pocatello (Idaho) Public Library. I was present that day, and
