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“Just before I finish, Ladies and Gentlemen, I would like you to do me a favour. Could you all please stand….” Palms and fingers lifting, I encourage them upright, and bit by bit the entire room rises to its feet…. Including ‘Wheelchair Auntie’…. …. who has already finished her champagne… “Yes, that’s it. Up, please…. Now, Ladies, please raise your arms above your heads, with your hands a few inches apart. Gentlemen, please do the same, but place your hands together… Thank you…” Snatching my mobile from my pocket, I point and click. “Thank you, Ladies and Gentlemen. That will look like a standing ovation when I put it on f*******: later.” There is general laughter and nodding then, as they settle again…. “And now, seriously, please charge your glasses, and be upstanding as we make