I Think I've Gone Insane
The first few chapters of this book aren’t the best and will be edited soon. I promise it gets To all my first-time readers, you are warmly welcomed and I’m so happy to have you here. I hope I don’t let you down. Thank you for giving my work a chance.
To all of my Re-readers, you are angels. Thank you for giving this book-my writing-the time of day for a second time. It blows me away seeing people actually say they Re-read this story. I never thought I’d have that, have you guys. Thank you for being here. The first few chapters of this book aren’t the best and will be edited in time. I began writing this book quite a bit ago and have grown immensely as a writer since that time. I promise it’s much more promising the further along you get, don’t give up after chapter one.
WARNING: This story does contain harsh language and inappropriate topics. It will include mentions and use of drugs and alcohol. s****l content is included in this story, though chapters containing s****l content will have an asterisk next to their titles for anyone who would like to skip such.
To anyone who is uncomfortable with people within the LGBTQIAP+ community, this novel is not for you. I am all-inclusive, always. There will be a gay (manxman) relationship in this novel, as well as queer characters, and so on. Do not dare comment anything derogatory if this is something you are against if you choose to read this book. I do not tolerate discrimination, and surely won’t here.
This is a safe place. Everyone is to feel loved. Everyone is to feel welcomed. Everyone is to feel comfortable. Everyone is to feel valued. Everyone is to feel valid in who they are, who they love, what they stand for, and all else in-between. This is a safe place.
The first few chapters of this book aren’t a riot. They need work, which will come in due time. I can assure you it gets much more promising and less (unbearably) cliche the further along you get. I have progressed as a writer a notable measure since I first began this book, I can assure you, and the plot of this story has done so with me. Don’t give up after chapter one.
REMINDER: Collge refers to sixth-form college, UK school system. This translates to 11th/12th (Junior and Senior) grade in the states. PLEASE KEEP THAT IN MIND WHILE READING. These characters are in college when using UK terminology for schooling. Uni is the equivalent of American college.
This novel is written in British-English, therefore for those from anyone outside of England, the terminology may be harder to understand. Feel free to ask questions, don’t be embarrassed if you’re confused. I’ve answered tons in the past, and am willing to answer more.
The main characters are seventeen-nineteen years old. Please remember this when it comes to issues regarding maturity. They are not adults and do not have the same mindsets regarding life and how to approach dilemmas as seen in adults. They are teenagers working through their issues to the best of their abilities and the extent of their knowledge thus far in life.
Also remember, this book is meant to be innocent. To have oblivious, partially cliche (possibly sickly cliche) moments at times. It is not perfect. Again. There is major development seen the further along it gets, as I developed over the years of writing and rewriting this novel.
There are grammar errors, please don’t remind me. Sometimes I type this book on my phone (my documents) in order to get updates out as quickly as possible Sometimes I slip up, simply because I am human, and make mistakes. (More often in the begin, it’s less torturous the more you read. My grammar skills have surely improved since the start, a great deal, I can say with confidence.) I will get around to correcting them in time.
One day I hope to fully edit and rework this book to be something I am more proud. Though, I need to make time for this, which is hard with balancing studies and work. As well, I would like to complete this novel before I began looking back and editing old chapters.
Thank you for your patience and your support.
Without further ado, enjoy. (Hopefully)
Song: Fire Alarms, album 5, Ed Sheeran
Angels’ POV
I walk into my class and take my seat in the back of the room, where I do my best to hide from everyone else enrolled amongst myself. It’s essentially an unreachable task, but I still can’t help trying. Social interaction isn’t really at the top of my list, dare I say.
Being blunt, I’m not a people’s person in the slightest.
My lonesome tactics have seemingly acted as self preservation for me of some sort, though. I haven’t had to deal with any pitiful and awfully cringewrothy drama in any of my days, much to my luck.
“Alright class, today we are going to do some reading as a class, since we haven’t done so in a while.” Mr.Clovis says, and there’s immediately a loud chorus of groans heard from the class of students. “Ah, your favorite, I always forget. Anyhow, we have to do it, it helps with public speaking, and that is a major asset you will need when you leave college next year and go to university. So, we must begin now. We will go from the left corner of the class to the right corner.” He exclaims and I immediately freeze up.
Well, today is not on my side then, is it?
“Alright students, please grab the book off of the corner of your desk and open it to page seventy-five. We will pick up where we left off last class. Alexander, you may begin for us.” He says and gives a slight nod to the blonde haired boy in the back of the class, who seemed to be thrilled to be here.
“Most of the documents that came to Major Major’s desk did not concern him at all. The vast majority consisted of allusions to prior communications which Major Major had never seen or heard of before.” Alexander spoke in a tone, that could not possibly sound less bland, and that’s all I heard before I began to zone out.
First, my morning had a a horrid start,which I would rather not talk about-and now here I am sitting at my desk, in college. I can feel my table shaking in the slightest as I bounce my leg up and down quick by nerves.
The last two years of college have been the worst for me, as they believe deeply in ‘preparing you for university’ and, ‘doing what’s to your own benifit!’. All in all, the amount of speaking I’ve had to do in front of people is absurd.
I snap back to reality after a bit of leisure day dreaming, and look to see Xander Hunt is currently reading, but I am too preoccupied to try and process through my head what he’s saying. He is sitting right next to a body who appears to be asleep.
It takes me just seconds before I identify the sleeping body as Zanthus.
“Zanthus. It is your turn to read.” Mr.Clovis says to Zanthus, although nobody calls him by his name so it’s a bit odd coming from him.
The sleepy dark haired boy looks up for a mere few second and glares at the fairly tall man who stands in front of him. He raises his eyebrows as if challenging Zanthus to go against his orders, and the lad does exactly just that when he simply lays his head back onto his arms which were serving as a makeshift pillow for him, crossed over his table.
It would be an understatement to say that no one is surprised at his disrespect towards the professor and the interaction that just occurred. It is a common occurrence for them to get at it every time it comes to any sort of activities in class.
“Zanthus I will not ask you again.” He snaps at him, though his orders seem to prove no avail for his case.
Zanthus continues to ignore him and keeps his head in his arms defiantly. It really is not outrageous, his behavior. He is notorious for being awful to authority. Though most of them just put up with it, Mr.Clovis always seems to get the most riled up about it. I turn to see that Mr.Clovis is now leaning over Zanthus with his hand on the table although Zanthus is yet to look up.
“Now!” Mr.Clovis states firmly, his tone on the verge of a proper shout.
Zanthus just looks up with a dark look in his eyes, his entire body stiff and holding a defensive demeanour as he speaks.
“No.” he spits out curtly through gritted teeth.
Over the years it’s become apparent that Zanthus has a limited vocabulary. He rarely talks at all really, but when he does it’s like now, a quick word or two at most.
“You will not disobey me.” Mr.Clovis states looking down on him, though it doesn’t seem to intimidate the lad at all.
Zanthus’ friends have all sat up a bit straighter by this point, and their gazes are quite short of polite towards the scene at hand. Xander sat on his right, Hades was placed to his left, which left Jax, Dimitri, and Maxim all sitting directly behind them so they made a group of six, their profound group.
It appears as though they too are ready to take some sort of battle in Zanthus’ defense. The tension in the room is high over what’s healthy at this point, and the class is simply sielnt, waiting for what’s next to come.
I take a good glance at the scene, and I swear for just a few seconds I see a different expression slip on Zanthus’s face. His gaze seemed a bit anxious to say, which is an attribute I know all too well. I can’t help but feel my heart strings tug a bit at the idea that he gets anxious just as I do.
I truly I haven’t got a clue why I am about to do what I am.
“I-I’ll read for him.” I offer out quietly, but loud enough for the professor to hear me. It’s not too hard anyways, he probably could have heard if I whispered, the desk he’s hovering over is right next to mine.
I keep my gaze focused on my desk as I feel a multitude of eyes fall upon my small body. I can’t help but wish the floor would just swallow me whole at once right this instance.
“What was that?” I hear Mr.Clovis question, and he seems fuming as he does so to my dismay.
“I-I said I’ll read f-for him.” I say again, trying to be louder as I do so, now considering he actually may not have heard me the first time.
I look up a bit after a silence greets my proposal, only to to see Mr.Clovis who is now back at the front of the classroom, leaning over his own desk. He appears like he’s in attempt of regaining his composure that he’d surely lost while aruging with Zanthus.
“Alright, Angel, you make take over for Zanthus.” He says in a calm voice, and I nod, glancing down and beginning to fumble out the words on the page in front of me.
****
As I make my way through the corridors of the campus, I make sure to keep my head down and stay out of anyone’s direct path, like I always do.
“Hey, Angel wait!” I hear a voice call after me, though I only speed up at this in hopes of avoiding whoever may want to confront me right now.
“Angel, Angel, slow down! I’m not trying to assault you or some s**t, I just came to thank you.” I slow down and feel myself shiver a but as the presence of Xander stands in front of me.
To my dismay, a whole array of students have already begun to stop and patiently wait for the interaction bound to happen between us.
“Uh, w-what?” I ask hesitantly, trying my best to stay composed while knowing I am under some spotlight of sorts at the moment.
“I wanted to thank you for taking over for Zanthus in that lecture. He wanted to tell you himself, but he had to run to grab something so he couldn’t.” He explains to me and I just nod my head, doing my best to keep my eyes and expression even at his statement.
“Uh, w-well, tell him I said your welcome,” I told him quietly and he offered me a small smile and nod of the head before turning away swiftly a heading towards the front of the campus.
Slowly the hallway begins to gain motion again, and everything begins to go back to normal. I don’t miss the gazes on me, and I don’t doubt I am not the only one utterly confused about what had just occured.
I take this time to swallow what had just been relayed onto me by Xander, and it really hits me.Zanthus Black just thanked me.
It’s quite an absurd thing to take in when regarding his status and known personality. He’s never been one of good manners, or any at all really, so recieving a thank you from him is proper unheard of.
Despite this, I can’y help but focus on one issue I’m facing. For some reason unknown to me, I felt my chest flutter a bit at the mentioning of Zanthus by Xander. I’ve just barely, barely got this urge to go on and find Zanthus and talk to him. Get to known him perhaps.
Lord take me now, I think I’ve gone insane.