Cheated and Pregnant (editing)

9

All of my fighting was in vain. All I ever did was scratch him with my nails and all he did was hiss in pain and continue what he was doing.

I was now n***d with him on top of me and i could feel his erection pressing into my thigh. I didn't stop fighting him. I know i am just wearing myself out but I'm not going to stop fighting. I wiggled I did all I could to get out of his grip.

I slapped him in his face as hard as I could he only got ahold on my hands and held them above my head. I was breathing hard.

"Stop f*****g moving or else I will hurt you. Of course this is gonna hurt but not as much as I am going to hurt you if you don't stop moving around." He threatens through gritted teeth but i didn't stop moving.

I was tense and my body was stiff. "Please don't do this to me. Please." That was the last plea that left my mouth before all I felt was immense pain.

I lost everything to that man that night. Everything and from then on I was never the same.

I cried  for him to stop until I blocked out.

I woke up sore when he was finished and was cleaning me up. I saw the aftermath of what he did to me. The blood and his semen. I cried. I turned on my side and cried.

I made my way to the bathroom to wash everything off of me. I felt so dirty and violated. Instead of putting it on warm I put it on hot.

It burns my skin but i don't care I need to get the dirtiness off of me. I know having a burning hot shower will not help get rid of his hands off of me but it will get off his finger prints off of me and the other things that he left on me.

I scrubbed and scrubbed. I turned off the shower and cried to turn it back on feeling more dirtier than I have ever been in my life. All the scrubbing still didn't get the dirt of so I cried in the shower until my eyes blurred and i couldn't see.

I woke up the morning in the shower. When I looked in the mirror my eyes were red and swollen. I looked like a truck hit me. I looked like the undead.

I went to school after covering up all the bruises but make up still couldn't hide my red swollen eyes. I didn't wanted to stay in that house it reminded me of the pain I was going through staying there and what happened to me last night.

I hated that place but now I want it to burn to the ground. I kept my head down in the hallways and I sat at the back of every class.

It was Mrs Williams who stopped me before I could enter the classroom and take my seat at the back. "Are you okay?" She asked concern.

I could only nod as an answer. "Are you sure? If you're not I'm..." I interrupted her before she could finish her sentence.

"I'm fine Mrs Williams you don't need to worry about me." I told her with my head down. I walked passed her and made my way to a seat in the back.

I could feel her eyes following me as I go. I could not concentrate in her class as I think about my messed up life. I'm strong enough not to cry in class. I don't want anyone to ask me questions. Questions like if I am okay or what is wrong.

I think about my life before how happy I was but these day all I do is cry and cry. I can only feel pain. I wish I was another girl. Like one of these girls in my school who as parents who love them. Who doesn't live in fear.

I could only dream of a different life until the bell ring signalling the end of class. It took awhile to registered in my head. I took up mt bag because I didn't take out anything for class. I was walking to the door when the teacher stopped me again.

"Grace a second?" She asked.

I walked to her desk. "What's up?" I asked.

"I just wanted to talk to you since as you seemed so distracted and you didn't participated like you use to. Is everything alright at home? Do you want to talk about it?" She said.

"I'm sorry. I know I'm distracted but it won't happen again." I promised her. I know it's going to he hard for me to get back on my game but i can't fail my classes.

"It's okay. I just want to make sure that you're okay." She said sounding concern like my mother would. It was hard holding back my tears this time and a tear slip. A sobbed left my lips. She was by my side instantly. "Grace are you okay? I'm sorry did i say something wrong?"

"No." I was crying now.

"Then what's wrong?" She asked in that motherly tone.

"It's it's..." I sobbed. "I miss my mom so much." I said between sobs. That's not only thing that I am crying about. I'm crying for everything bad that has happened to me since my mother had died.

She pulled me into a hug and I cried on her shoulder. She whispered soothing words in my ear to stop me from crying. I was embarrassed that I was crying in front of my English teacher and i was ruining her shirt.

"I'm sorry." I said pulling away wiping at my eyes.

"It's okay." She said smiling at me. I gave her a weak smile in return for all her kindness. "You can talk to me any time you want to talk okay."

"Thank you Mrs Williams." I said.

"No need to thank me dear and you can call me Sonya if you want

You can consider me as a friend from now on." She said smiling.

"Okay Mrs Williams." I said smiling halfway.

"It's Sonya to you Grace. Just don't let anyone in on our little secret." I was smiling now whwrn she said that somehow she has cheered me up a little.

"I won't." I said to her and winked. She smiled. "I'll see you around school Mrs... Sonya. Goodbye have a great day." I told her and left when she told me good bye too.

This was how it was for me when I would come to school having a bad day. I don't know how she do it but she always know that something is wrong with me and tries to cheer me up before I leave her class.

But over time things got worse for me at home it was hard to talk to her but when i did i tried my best not to cry or open up to her.

She's a good woman, now a role model to me someone i could look up to because i don't have alot of people like that in my life.

He didn't r***d me again but that didn't mean that life was all love and kisses goodnight from Daddy while he wish me puts me to sleep. I never left my door open again and I make sure to avoid him at all cost.

He still beats me. He even starved me a few times. I know i was losing weight but i eat any chances that I got. When he stopped starving me and i started eating again I ate as much as I could.

It was months after i went to school i came back home to a living room full of empty beer bottles. I sighed and clean the up throwing them into the trash can. I made my way slowly up to my bed room.

My mouth hang wide open and my eyes wide. My bedroom door was gone. It was removed from the hinges. I started panicking. I ran into my room to check if anything was missing but everything was where i left it.

So why did he removed the door? I started to panic. Why is he doing this to me? My room was my only escape now i don't have anywhere to hide from him anymore. He can just walk in and out of my room as he likes.

God this can't be happening to me. Please don't this be happening to me. I have to pt on back that door or else I am doomed. I can't believe him, i can't believe he would have gone this far and removed my door.

I have to put it back up but i don't know how to do that and i don't have any money to pay someone to do that for me. I have just a little in my savings but i don't think that would be enough.

I was walking back and fro in my room with my hands on my head. I was scared and worried for my safety now. He can get to me and i don't have anywhere to run and hide.

I stopped pacing and run down the stairs and to the basement to get my door and figure out how I am going to put back up my door.

I opened the basement door turned on the lights and walked down the stairs. I looked around the corner and there it was leaned up in a corner by itself.

I will have to learn how to use the tools to put om back the door. I ran back upstairs to my room and looked at the door jam.