Ever or Never After

Chapter Four

This birthday has to be the worst of my life. Hell, it was probably the worst in all of history.

Richard....my step-dad is my freaking mate and he is married to my freaking mother.

Right now, I watched angrily as Richard and my mom cuddled up on the couch as we had "family" movie night.

I can't believe him...

All this time he knew....All this time when he was going on dates with my mom and kissing her and screwing he-OH MY GOD I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS.

I felt like crying. My heart was breaking every time I glanced at them.

Mom looked content and happy snuggled up again him. This is why I made the decision to not tell her. Yet..anyways.

You don't know how bad she was after Dad died. She was the beyond definition of a wreck. How many nights she tried to commit suicide or cry for hours before she fell asleep. I was there for her through all of that and I refuse to let her reach that low again...even if she has to be happy with what is mine. The death of a wolf's mate is the worst. You have to live with feeling the emptiness of half of yourself and most wolves who experienced that….well, lets just say most to them aren't with us anymore.

Maybe I could reject him and let them be... But rejecting your mate is just as bad as their death. Some would even say it's worse.

Everything alright hunny?" I felt mom's hand on my shoulder and I looked at her to see a concerned look on her face.

"Yeah mom I'm fine", I replied in a soft tone, giving her a small smile.

"Well, you're crying. The movie isn't that sad sweetie." She added with a chuckle.

My hand went up to my face subconsciously and I wiped my eyes. God, I didn't even realize I was crying, how am I going to do this?

"Oh. Haha, Just felt a little sad for John that Savannah married someone else. He really cared about her and waited for her but she went ahead and got with someone else, knowing it would hurt him." I said, and I saw Richard stiffen slightly as he got the message behind my words.

"Maybe she didn't have a choice." He added, not making eye contact with me and I shook my head slowly.

"There is always a choice. People just love to play victim and act like they don't have one."

Richard didn't say anything in reply to what I said because he knew I was right.

He had a choice. He could of told me when he found out and spared me the pain I've been feeling all these years but no, he willingly lied to me and let me hurt seeing him with my mother. I will never forgive him for that.

"Well" Mom began after a moment of silence. "Maybe if we finish the movie we can see why she-"

"I'm going to bed." I rudely said, cutting her off. I felt a twinge of guilt for snapping at her, she didn't know what was going on. It isn't her fault and I was losing my temper on her. She didn't deserve that.

I mumbled a goodnight and got up without waiting for a reply from either of them, heading to my room.

As I trudged up the stairs, my built up emotions took over and I sobbed as quietly as possible.How could he do this to me? How could any man put his mate through this type of pain willingly?

My human half despised Richard, but my wolf side craved him. For him to touch me, hold me and make the pain go away. It disgusted me that my wolf still ached for him despite the pain I was feeling and I knew it wasn't going to go away any time soon if ever.

Opening my bedroom door, I pushed it to close and flopped down on my bed to continue my sobbing into a pillow, but then it dawned on me...

I didn't hear the door shut. His scent hit me like a pile of bricks and I felt like crying all over again.

"f**k off Richard." I said with an added sniffle.

"Danica please, let me explain", he said and I heard the light shuffling of his feet move closer to my bed.

I shot up from my bed and stood before him, my arms crossed and I was seething. Bipolar, I know but is he being serious?

"Okay Richard. Give me your pathetic excuse as too why you lied to me all these years. Why you knew I was your mate since the moment we first met and said nothing. Why you watched me literally go for days and weeks in agony because you know I felt a connection between us, I just didn't know we were mates. Do you think I deserve this? Do you think my mother deserves this? She has been through too much Richard and you are playing her just like you played me. You are a selfish son of a b***h and I can't wait till I get the strength to reject your worthless ass."

The words poured out of my mouth like a waterfall and for a moment, I didn't realize what I said.

Could I actually reject him? Rejecting your mate is the hardest thing any wolf would have to do besides their first shift. You would be cutting all ties from your other half, severing the mate bond and the pain you will feel from that, will be like no other, but do I have a choice?

Like I said before, there is always a choice but I won't put my mother through pain and let her fall back into despair. It may sound stupid, but you have to be in my situation to understand where I'm coming from. I love her, a lot and I would do anything to keep her happy, even if it costs me my own happiness. She is all I have left...

"I didn't have a choice Danica. I was surprised to even find you. I went through most of my life searching for my mate and I never found her, but I guess she just wasn't born yet." He said with a sight chuckle but I was in no laughing mood.

"I couldn't tell you we were mates. You were 16 years old, Danica. 16! I was 33 years old. Think about how that would look. I didn't think you would even believe me. And your mother...I didn't want to be with her after I first met you but I had to stay because if I left then I didn't know if I'd ever see you again. Danica I had no intentions of letting you suffer, I wasn't even aware you felt the pull. You never said anything to me."

I laughed dryly.

"Yeah I'm going to my step-dad and tell him I've had feelings from the moment we met with no explanations whatsoever. That made no sense to me. I was a kid. I don't give a s**t what you think was right or what was assumed or whatever. The point is you should of said something. Whether or not I'd believe you, that doesn't mean you stay quiet and keep something as huge as this to yourself Richard. You could of avoided this situation right now if you had just said something."

Richard ran his hand through his thick locks and sighed, obviously frustrated.

"I'm sorry."

I rolled my eyes and wiped my tears.

"You knew it was going to hurt me but you did it anyway so you f**k you and your apology and get the hell out of my room."

He sent me a hurt look, then reluctantly left my room, closing the door behind him.

My legs felt wobbly and my shoulders shook as a heart wrenching sob took over me and I fell to the floor. I reached for my pillow from the bed and buried my face into it once more. I couldn't afford for my mother to hear my crying and come up here asking questions.

As if on cue, thunder began to roll and the Pitter patter of rain echoed off my window. In the distance, I hear my mother's laughter ring out around the house and my eyes shut themselves. My head began to pound from my crying so I tried to calm myself down but the more I tried, the more I felt the tears welt up in my eyes, threatening to come down joined by another series of sobs.

It's going to be a long night.