Blood & Pain: My Mafia Stepbrother

chapter 9 Roman

Roman p.o.v.

"Control" is a small but strong word. I am not good at so many things but one thing in which I am perfect is control. Whether it is to control the people around me or to control my sadist beast.

I am not normal and I know it since I was a teenager. I lost my control once but after that one incident, I never risk losing it again. The beast inside of me was sleeping for two years but looks like he is awakened. The urge to slit someone's throat or to f**k her endless until she can't even stand is too high. I will never touch her like that, she is just a kid so I have to take the other option. I have to kill someone before I lost my god damn mind.

I wake up today with a new determination that I will not do any inappropriate things to Mia but the second she comes downstairs wearing that little dress all I want to do is to tear that dress apart and f**k her senseless right there so every single one of my men can know that who she belongs to because they all are f*****g staring at her. But there is only one problem she did not belong to me. She is not mine and never will be and I have to accept that fact.

She did not see me when I was staring at her like a creep because she was too busy ogling over Giovanni. Now I regret my decision to appoint him as her bodyguard. Her long beautiful hairs are wet and she was wearing a little white dress which shows her curves perfectly. I don't know why am obsessed with her thighs so much they look delicious. I want to mark every inch of her body. Ughhh Great so much of me being appropriate...

When she entered the kitchen I started using my mobile so that she did not see my lustful gaze over her body. I again turn my head to see her and she was already staring at me our eyes met just for a second but I turn away and started eating my food. Good, that's the way I should behave around her maybe I should say good morning but it's okay I will take baby steps to become a normal brother.

My father and Mia were talking about something but my mind was somewhere else or should I say something else which is my little sister's cleavage. Why does she have to wear a dress like that? I am turning into a first-class creep. I want to slap myself for doing this. I decided that it will be best for me to run away from here, I can eat breakfast in the office but my father have to ruin my plan he told me to take her to Dane's house and spend the weekend there.

How am I going to survive there with her and more important question how am I going to teach in the same school where she will be studying wearing those short school dress, my mind already started imagining her wearing a short school skirt and this makes me feel more disgust by myself.

I was waiting in my car for Mia to arrive so that we can go to Dane's house when I received Antonio's call. He is one of my friends like Giovanni. Only he, Dane and my father knows about my mental health and therapy. I am not in the mood to chit chat but maybe he wants to tell me something important so I received his call.

" If you called me just to tell me about your stupid date then I am going to kill you" I spat.

Antonio is the most irritating person I have ever met. Most of the time he called me just to tell me about his relationship problems that is why I barely attend his calls when he has to tell me something about work-related he have to call Dane.

" Hey hey don't hang up on me again. It is about work I swear"

"Speak" I replied

"So I called to ask what we going to do with those Russian spies they are still in the torture room and I think they tell us everything. we can't kill them so what are we going to do"

First time in my life I am happy that I received Antonio's call. I want to kill someone and now I know who is going to die... I am going to kill those Russian spies.

"Don't do anything I am coming. I will kill them myself"

"What... but boss ordered us not to kill anyone until he finishes that sheriff"

"Stop being my father's b***h. Who is going to tell him? It's been 3 months that I did not kill anyone and you know how much I love to kill so wait for me and don't kill them...yet" I said and cut the call because Mia is coming towards the car.

She was watching those lily flowers maybe she also like those flowers. As much as I love to see her watching those flowers, I can't because we are getting late so I blew the horn to get her attention. She immediately see me waiting and come in the car and I started driving.

"So you like Lillies?" I asked

"Yes they are my favorite"

"They are my mother's favorite too" I replied. I don't like to talk about my mother to anyone not even to Dane. But I don't know why I tell mia about it.

"My father used to plant lily flowers for me" she replied. She looks sad talking about her father. I don't know anything about her I didn't even read the file in which all the information is written about her and her mother.

" Your father is a good man then"

"Yes he was perfect" she replied. Did her father dead?

"How he died... You don't have to tell me if you don't want to" I asked

"What... no-no he is alive and healthy. He is not like himself anymore after the divorce"

Great, I should think before speaking. What can I do I am not good at talking and first time in my life I am getting nervous to talk to someone.

" Ohh sorry what happened to him," I asked. I don't know why I even talked about her father I just want to know her and the way she is talking about her father looks like they were close to each other.

" He loved my mom I don't know why she left him for that old man," she said with venom in her voice.

Looks like I am not the only one who hates my father. If someone else called him an old man I must get offended and kill them. Only I can call him an old man but now mia is his daughter so I think she also can call him that. When she realized what she said she gets panicked maybe she is thinking that I get offended.

"s**t s**t I am sorry I didn't mean it."

"It's okay I also call him old man. He is old anyway just don't call him that in front of everyone" I replied while chuckling.

she looks so adorable when she gets panicked. Her big doe eyes were looking at me in anticipation and she was biting her bottom lips. I turn away from her because I don't want to feel the way I am feeling right now. Why she is affecting me so much.

"I have work to attend to so I might come late at night. I will try to come before dinner. If you need anything feel free to ask Dane and Georgia okay" I tell her and I purposely changed the topic.

" How he is... I mean Dane. is he like your father?"

" No, he is nothing like me and my father you will love him. He is like a man child"

I am right Dane is nothing like me and my father.

Although he is also part of the mafia and my right-hand man. he is dangerous and intelligent. He also killed so many people but still, the light inside of him is there maybe because he has Georgia. He is so good at separating his personal and mafia life.

"What is man child," she asked

"You will see when you meet him" I replied.

I am seriously proud of myself. I didn't do any inappropriate thing on the whole ride. There is still that strange attraction between us but I am sure once I killed someone my cravings will stop and the beast inside of me will sleep. I know it's no way I am attracted towards a kid it's just because I was frustrated. Yes, that's right. Now I am feeling confident.

I was lost in my thoughts that I didn't pay attention to the car in front of me. We are about to crash but I press the breaks at right time. Mia is about to hit herself at the dashboard but I hold her with one arm. My hand is pressed against her chest I can feel her big and soft breast. all I want to grab them but I control myself and remove my hand from her body.

" Are you alright?" I asked her

Her cheeks are pink and her head is down she is watching her legs. She is grabbing the hem of her dress tightly. I can't take my eyes off her thighs. So smooth and soft all I want to do is grab them and kiss and bite them. She tilts her head towards me and our eyes meet. Her face is flushed. And her cheeks turn into an adorable shade of pink

. My eyes roam over her lips and she licks her lips and bites her lower lip. Why is she doing it? I can't control it anymore. I held her cheeks with one hand and touch her lips with my thumb. They are softer than I imagined it is like I am touching the petals of lily flowers. I can't take my eyes off her face. I just want to hold her. It is different from what I ever felt I didn't want to f**k her or tie her up I just want to hold her and never let her go. she is like a fragile doll...

I touch her cheeks with the back of my hand and push her hair out of her face. All part of my body is screaming at me to stay away from her my mind is scolding me but the beast inside of me is not going to stop now just one kiss. A kiss doesn't hurt right. Just one last time... I see her eyes and she was staring at me with her doe eyes our eyes met and I lost all my sanity I get close to her face, I can feel her breath in my face our faces are inches apart but then my phone rang and I get my senses back...

What I am going to do with myself and I am not proud of myself anymore. I clear my throat and pick up the phone. Dane is calling me I look out from my window and see him standing in front of his door. He didn't see us, did he? I don't think he can see us from that distance.

" We are here. Let's go I am getting late" I said

" Um.. okay" she replies stuttering.

We get out of the car and go towards Dane's house. This weekend is going to be hell for me...