V - Empty Canvass
1723 Words
Shane
Jellaine and the others asked me to go with them to hang out after school. I shook my head saying I needed to get home right away. Meryll pouted her lips, and though I could feel they are genuine in inviting me to join them, I felt out of place.
I was still afraid to open up friendship to strangers I barely know. Trust issues. Sometimes you have to learn it the hard way.
“You sure?” Theo asked, watching me climbed on my bike.
I fastened my helmet, keeping my head secured. “Pretty sure.”
He shrugged his shoulder and stepped back. “Drive safely, then.”
Unexpectedly, his words warmed my chest and I didn’t like it. I felt the need to be friendly with him today because he was gentleman enough not to ask me about the incident in the library. After all, Rocky was pretty famous in Laroyo U, since he was good soccer player.
But knowing he had a girlfriend made it all awkward for me. Especially now that I had learned his girlfriend went to a different school.
“Thanks, Theo,” I said and started the bike.
****
Home was empty when I arrived. But not really, my dog Cheerio came down the stairs, tackling me, reaching for my face to kiss. On the refrigerator, there was a pinned sticky note, saying they went out for dinner.
“Freaking great,” I mumbled, realizing I had to make my own meal. After rubbing Cheerio’s tummy, I opened the fridge.
But it was fine, though. I always liked keeping my hands busy. Cooking, baking, washing plates and drawing were the usual things I did to keep myself busy, losing my mind even for a while.
But I wasn’t in the mood to cook something today so I just heat up some left over from yesterday night. My mom didn’t want to keep a maid or even a nanny. She wanted to be a hands-on mom for my younger brother, which she failed to do when I was little. Maybe now she realized what would happen if she lose her focus on a kid.
Just like what happened to me.
Basically now, my life was like an empty canvass. I knew how to put colors on it, sure, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. It was like forgetting a very familiar place, or forgetting your name, and no matter how hard I tried to remember, my mind refused and shut down.
My cellphone vibrated and I saw Rocky’s number on the screen. Without letting another second, I end the call.
****
Tuesday was such a blur.
I got out of school thirty minutes late because of a project I have to turn in before five o’clock. Luckily, I made it to the deadline.
Pulling over the hood of my jacket on my head, I started toward the parking lot, spinning the keys on my hand. My boots ticked as I walked in haste on the pavement, desperate to leave the school.
But then I trailed, seeing Rocky and Sandra on his Ford Ranger, just beside my big bike.
“f**k,” I muttered. With my brows on furrow, I hid behind a white minivan, peeking to where my bike was parked.
“You cursed a lot,” a familiar voice said. Theo.
“Bad habit, I guess.”
“I figured,” he whispered.
I could feel him staring at me from my peripheral vision. So I turned to him. “Uh, do you need something? I’m pretty sure we don’t have schedule for Drama Soc today.”
His eyes were now curious. “I need something, yes,” he replied then nodded toward the minivan. “I need to get into my van.”
“Oh, right, sorry,” I said but didn’t move.
He smiled a little. Now for sure, I looked utterly crazy.
“You’re awfully weird today, Shay.” He started to follow again my gaze so I just waited for him to realize my situation.
He let out a sigh. I knew he would figure it out. He was smart. “So, another boyfriend issue.”
“Wait, what?” I asked, raising an eyebrow. “We’re not. We’re over.”
He looked apologetic. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to pry or something.”
I just shrugged my shoulder. “I just needed them to go away or leave first. My motorcycle’s parked beside them.”
He checked his watch and thought for a moment. “Well, do you wanna stay here or do you wanna hide inside the van?”
So we get in the minivan, carefully not letting us be seen.
Theo started the car and opened the air conditioning, swiftly pressing the radio as he rested his back on the driver’s seat.
“Sorry for this,” I whispered, looking at his tired eyes.
He shook his head. “It’s okay. The world needs a lot of better person. I’m just trying to be one. So, no worries, Shay.”
I couldn’t help but smile at his words.
“Your girlfriend won’t mind this?” I asked, motioning our situation.
“What do you mean ‘this’?” Theo asked, looking puzzled.
“She won’t get… I mean… you know.”
He laughed, the same manly laugh I heard when Meryll told him some jokes. “No she won’t get mad or jealous to know there is a girl sitting beside me on my minivan.” He sounded differently, as if there was more to his words. Or maybe I’m just overthinking things. Like always.
“You know,” I started, carefully balancing my words. “I thought you don’t have a girlfriend.”
He smirked. “Why would you assume that? I don’t think I’m that ugly not to get a girl.”
“Oh, come on. You’re not ugly.” I forced a laugh at his response. “It’s just that… You shared your lunch with me. You’re kind and…”
He cleared out his throat before briefly biting his lower lip. “So just because I shared my lunch with a girl… that made you think I don’t have a girlfriend?”
“Yeah, isn’t that how guys flirt?”
Theo started to laugh, making me feel questioned my thought. “Oh, Shay… I don’t know what kind of people you circled yourself in, but just because a guy is kind to a girl doesn’t make him a flirt. This world is so messed up now that being a gentleman and polite is instant equivalent to flirting.”
His words silenced me. It made me kick myself internally and I regretted speaking my thoughts aloud. He made me looked like a stupid kid.
“Chivalry’s not dead,” he added.
My cheeks heated. “Well, most guys have some inner motives.”
He considered that for a moment. “Let’s just say I am not most guys.”
I stared at him for a moment before nodding my head.
Silence filled the room for a while, the song from the radio was the only noise.
“So, I think I should ask this,” Theo stated as he looked on his rear view mirror, maybe peeking at Rocky and Sandra. “Why are you hiding from them?”
“Kind of long story,” I stated, looking away from him.
“Hmmm,” he hummed. “I think we have time since those guys seems don’t have a plan to leave for another hour.”
Turning around to look at my former friends, I saw as the others huddled with Rocky and Sandra, same grin on their faces. Knowing them, it would take an hour for Sandra to pick a place to hang out after school. Theo had a point.
“You’re friends with the lot of them, correct?” he asked.
Letting out a sigh, I rested my back on the seat. “They used to be. Not anymore.” When Theo said nothing, I continued. “We were kinda involved in something really bad, like bad bad, and when my dad learned what I have been into, he got angry. He got so much angry that he… hurt them.”
I was afraid to look at his reaction. I was afraid to see judgments in his eyes. But when I glanced over at him, he was quiet, his eyes seemed to say he understood.
“Well, we can always choose our friends,” he said after a while. “I bet you’re glad to meet a bunch of cool people in Drama Soc, huh?”
That made me laughed genuinely. “You’re going to keep everything a secret, right?”
Theo instantly brought his hand between us, sticking up his pinky finger. “I f*****g pinky swear,” he uttered.
My eyes grew wide hearing him say that.
“What? You thought you’re the only one who can curse?”
I shook my head, biting my laugh. “No, Theo. I just never imagined you sticking your pinky finger to make a promise.”
He laughed, joining me, and we both momentarily forget about my friends.
It was nearing dusk when Rocky’s pick-up car started and they left ten minutes after.
“Finally,” I muttered, readying myself to leave as well. “Thanks.”
Theo shrugged his shoulder and unlocked the doors. “You’re welcome. Drive safely, Shay.”
I opened the car door and climbed down, waving a hand at him. “You too!”
For the first time in months, I felt a small pulse of happiness to be able to talk to someone.
Sandy’s one hell of a lucky girl.
- Writer
