I stopped by the kitchen, where it was a bustle of activity.
“Miss Simone, can I help you with something?” The head Omega, Amelia, wiped her hands on her apron and offered me a genuine smile.
The Omegas here always treated me kindly and respected the station I once held, now reduced to nothing besides my powerful bloodline.
I shook my head. “I don’t want to be any trouble. I just came for a snack.” She nodded and let me pass. I knew where everything was here; this place had become my refuge ever since I was allowed out of my room.
Since I lost my home, this kitchen was the only place where I felt remotely comfortable. I craved its warmth and constant activity, which helped to distract me from thoughts and memories that used to constantly replay in my mind whenever I had a moment of solitude.
I made to pick up an apple slice covered in cinnamon and sugar that was destined for a pie, earning me a playful scowl from the Omega closest to me—a small, innocent distraction to take what I needed. I skillfully slipped what I came for into my pocket unnoticed.
The weight felt heavy but warm against the fabric of my leg, like a promise I made to myself finally solidifying.
I trudged back to my rooms. The packhouse was old and drafty. Most of it was made from stone, and it reminded me of a castle—a dreary, depressing castle.
The first Alpha who took these sacred lands built the house and now stood homage to how long their line had ruled over their stolen grounds.
Thick rugs covered every stone floor, and fireplaces were present in every room to heat it against the biting cold, cold enough that werewolves needed shelter and warmth against the winters here.
The updated part of the packhouse, a recent extension, was made of dark wood and glass. It was too modern for the rest of the place, and it stuck out as a mismatched afterthought, but Luna Addison insisted.
The ranked members and their families moved into the new construction that was almost completed shortly after I arrived. Besides the ranked member's sleeping quarters, the extension held guest rooms for the most important visitors and a smaller event area.
The Omega’s quarters, head warriors, and additional guest rooms stayed in a part of the original pack house along with me.
The original packhouse was still where they ate every meal and held the rare larger events. I didn’t understand the purpose of the remodel, but I didn’t care enough to ask. I was just delighted I was left in my cold, drafty room. It made me feel better knowing I was in a different part of the house from them, sleeping under a different roof than those monsters.
The privilege of dining with the family was bestowed on me last year only when they were certain I was one their pawn. Only a few months ago was I allowed to join other events that didn’t include the immediate family, but I noted a pattern that all those attending those events were from packs further away.
I could only assume I was allowed at those dinners to prime me for one of their son’s beds so I would be less of a feral rogue and more of an obedient lady.
I heard Alpha Raymond joke to Luna Addison that I was finally house-trained and no longer a mutt. The Luna took it as a compliment, as she was in charge of my initial berating. She didn’t much like a stray dog being taken into her pack, and she never let me forget it.
Once they trusted me enough not to try to run, I was allowed out of my room, and they locked me in the night they took me. It took over a year for them to believe I was broken enough. In that year, my grief, loneliness, and anger were my only friends.
The Omegas that attended me were switched out frequently, so I could never form a bond with them or, more importantly, them with me.
Once they saw how fragile I was, I was allowed to wander these ancient halls as a ghost, practically invisible.
Now, years later, the picture of the submissive, shattered, d.ead Alpha’s daughter, they knew I wouldn’t leave and didn’t pay me much thought unless they were bored.
I shut the door behind me, making sure it was locked, before pulling back a corner of the thick, faded rug closest to the foot of my bed. I pried back a small, loose stone, barely larger than my fist. It took me much longer than I cared to admit to hollow out this space.
There were too many prying eyes, too many people with access to this room. I hadn’t risked hiding anything there permanently, not yet, at least.
I dug around the small space until my fingers brushed the only thing I kept there and pulled it out. The stone was cool in my hands, but it thrummed with promise as it was waiting for me to be ready to use it all this time. I had chosen it carefully, discarding others in its place, until I found this one.
I walked on silent feet to the door, listening and waiting. Once I was certain no one was coming, I went to my bathroom, turned on the water in the tub, and took a spot in the doorway of the bathroom, one eye on the shadows I memorized under my bedroom door.
The churning water drowned out any soft sound, but that meant I had to rely on my eyes only.
I worked as fast as possible while still being thorough; once I was pleased with my work, I stashed everything and covered it again, triple-checking it before unlocking my door.
I sunk into the barely warm bath and scrubbed myself mindlessly, replaying my plan in my mind—the lullaby that had drifted me off to sleep, the mantra that had woken me up in the morning, the only thing keeping me here—my plan.
Soft feet sounded on the carpet in my room, but I didn’t move. I knew who they belonged to.
“Miss, it's almost dinner time, and you’re expected.” I reluctantly sat up in the bath and dragged myself out, hugging my shoulders inward as Alice, my most recent attending Omega, draped a towel over my shoulders. "There is a visiting Alpha, Luna, and his son," she said in a tone that seemed like that news would cheer me; I did not understand why.
“Thanks.” I nodded to her, my eyes distant.
“I laid out a dress for you, the one that you like,” she said.
I looked at the bed and saw that light purple floor-length dress with long sleeves made out of some velvet material. It was disgustingly hideous; it fit all wrong and hung off me. Naturally, I absolutely loved it for this version of me. I gave her a timid smile and nodded my thanks.
After I was dressed, she brushed my hair in front of the mirror by the fire. It still felt weird having someone do this. It felt so wrong. I tensed at the memory of my mother doing this that crawled out before I could catch it and shove it back deep down. Alice probably misunderstood my reaction as a side effect of my constant fear, and I let her.
She tried again in vain to curl some of my pin-straight hair, but it wouldn’t hold. Alice was sweet but not the brightest. How many times had we tried the same thing?
She looked flustered when she finally set down the curling rod and swept some hair off my face, pining it back.
Even as a child, I didn't remember Omegas helping me prepare for dinner. This seemed excessive, decadent, like something from a time long since passed. I wasn’t sure if anyone else got this level of help or if they deemed it necessary for a person in my delicate state, or perhaps they thought I still needed to be watched multiple times a day.
“Thank you, Alice.” I gave her a small smile at my appearance.
My skin had grown paler than usual these past years, and even though my home pack was neighboring this one, and even when the sun shone, it barely heated the lands, I used to get outside daily—a luxury I didn’t feel the need to take advantage of here.
It didn’t matter that I wasn’t drowning in my grief anymore, that I had found a purpose. I was still a shell of who I used to be.
My black hair hung almost to my waist now, and my once bright gray eyes were filled with a sort of sadness, of a hollowness I didn’t have to fake. It seemed that my eyes carried the weight of what happened, and I couldn’t even will them to look anything but depleted.
“It's time to go down now,” Alice said, pulling me from my thoughts.
I stood and grabbed a bunch of the ugly purple dress and let her open the door for me before letting the dress drag behind me down the stairs.
The dining room was quiet, not what I expected when they had dinner guests. I took the final steps into the open doorway; no one looked at me. It was just the immediate family here. I wouldn't be surprised if Alice had gotten it wrong. I went to take my regular seat next to Luna Addison.
The Alpha sat at the head, his three sons to his right and his Luna and me to his left. It wasn’t an honorary position as usually there weren’t any others joining us. I would sit there in silence and listen to their odious conversations and pick out whatever I could that I deemed useful, which was usually absolutely nothing.
“No.” Luna Addison waved me away and shot her husband an exasperated look. “You sit at the end. We have guests today.” She rolled her eyes and swatted my hand away from the back of the chair. I pulled it back quickly after her ring-encrusted hand made contact with mine.
I fought the scowl and chose a hurt look, nursing my hand. “I’m sorry, I thought—”
“You’re still not used to events, are you?” she asked with mock sympathy. “You were so young when your parents d.ied,” she said as if it wasn’t her mate who was responsible for k.illing them.
I stared at her blankly.
“Move.” She pointed, and then her eyes darted behind me. “Ah, Alpha Ben, Luna Claire, come come," she greeted her guests. "We have had our Omegas s.laving away all day for you. You must be starving.” She whisked past me, and I moved to the end of the table unnoticed.
The food might have been good, but I wasn’t paying attention. The visiting Alpha from an apparently newly established pack that was nearby was whispering to Alpha Raymond.
I stole a glance at the men, and Alpha Raymond looked confused. I waited a moment before looking again. Now he looked furious, his fist clenched around his fork. I let myself take a long bite, pretending to contemplate my food before looking once more. Now, he was pale, his eyes wide.
“What is it?” Hudson asked his dad, bored, as he twirled his steak knife on the table. I wasn't the only one who noticed.