Chapter 1
3114 Words
Chapter 1Date: April 3, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: Moon music
Hey,
Well. Here it is. It’s probably about time we moved things off the board, don’t you think? Only took us…*looks at calendar*…five months and eight days. Never pegged you for a woman that plays hard to get. But far be it for me to back off from a challenge.
I’ve got the music, now all I need is your snail mail. Ball’s in your court.
Ben
* * * *
Date: April 4, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Re: Moon music
Hey Ben,
Sorry it took so long to respond. Work has been crazy busy. I don’t even have a chance to get caught up on the board, but I didn’t want to leave you hanging! Anything interesting going on?
*laughs* I’m not hard to get. You just never offered me gifts before. I’m still upset I missed that show! Too bad I don’t have concert days, huh? I could use those a lot more than sick days.
Anyway, here’s my address. I’ll be more than happy to pay for shipping.
685 Mountain View
Altadena, CA 91001
Ana
* * * *
Date: April 4, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: Re: Moon music
Hey Ana,
If I had known your company could be bought for a couple of bootlegs and some stamps, I would’ve made the offer months ago. You’re one of a small, select group from the board that doesn’t make me want to throw my computer out the nonexistent window of my office. If I have to hear one more post about how “hawt Travis is”…
Please tell me you don’t think Travis is hot. This would blow if I pissed you off already.
Music’s in the mail. And something a little extra for you. Because that small, select group is really a solo act.
Ben
* * * *
Date: April 4, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Re: Moon music
Ben,
No, I don’t think Travis is “hawt.” He’s a bit young for me. Neil on the other hand…*laughs*
I have to admit, I’m a bit flattered to see I don’t make you want to throw your computer out your nonexistent window. I’ve noticed your posts since you first registered on the board. Coherent, intelligent, actually interested in the music? I wondered if you took a wrong turn somewhere to find the board. I’m really happy you decided to stick around. I always make it a point to read your posts.
I’ll let you know as soon as I get it. I can’t wait to see what the “something extra” is. I thought I was excited about the package before (I never get anything in the mail these days but bills, it seems).
Ana
* * * *
Date: April 4, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: Re: Moon music
Young, huh? I guess I probably shouldn’t tell you how old I am then, lol.
Ben
* * * *
Date: April 4, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Re: Moon music
Oh, no. Now I’m worried. You’re not younger than Travis are you?!
Ana
* * * *
Date: April 5, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: Re: Moon music
Nope. But I *am* younger than Neil. Have you lost all respect for me now?
Ben
* * * *
Date: April 5, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Re: Moon music
Younger than Neil, huh? No, if anything, I’m more impressed with your ability to write complete sentences. Oh god, I probably sound like some sort of snob, don’t I? I don’t hate everybody younger than 30, I promise.
So, what do you do in your office with your nonexistent window, besides read Internet message boards?
Ana
* * * *
Date: April 5, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: The scoop
Spend too much time trying to get out of grading tests, lol.
Actually, I teach freshman math courses at UCLA. The basics mostly—pre-calculus, trig, advanced algebra. They save all the really good subjects for the professors who have already lost all their hair and wear bifocals from squinting at formulas all day. So actually, I don’t spend a lot of time in my office/cubicle at all. I’ve just been looking for extra reasons to get online the past couple days to check my e-mail. *wink*
So if I promise not to think you’re a snob, will you promise not to think I’m a geek? Not all number crunchers are virgins with Princess Leia fetishes, you know.
Ben
* * * *
Date: April 5, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Re: The scoop
Not into the gold bikini, huh? Too bad, because I was about to suggest I break mine out. But if you’re not into bikinis and chains…*laughs*
Actually, I don’t think you’re a geek. I think your job sounds really interesting. I can’t help but be impressed with a man who teaches. I did one course as a grad student and realized it was not the job for me.
Between you and me, I’ve been finding excuses to get online all day. Which isn’t good because I have a major project due in….twenty-two hours and 49 minutes.
Ana
* * * *
Date: April 5, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: The scoop
I never said anything about not liking chains. It’s the whole damsel in distress thing that doesn’t do anything for me. Give me a strong woman over a wimp any day of the week.
And yes, I’m a product of the Lara Croft generation. Sue me.
Major project? You’ve never said what you do, though from the way you’re always coming up with all the best ideas for the Street Team, I’ll bet it’s something creative.
Ben
PS: I have zero problem being your distraction. The way I see it, you’re already distracting me. I think turnabout is fair play.
* * * *
Date: April 5, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Re: The scoop
I work for a PR firm here in LA. Sorry, I can’t tell you which one. I’ve got to be super-careful, because if my boss found out I do some of this stuff for free, she’d have a FIT. A major, major client is launching a book in a few months, and I need to have an entire marketing plan for her. In twenty hours now.
So you like strong women in chains? Or you like strong women to use chains on you? (I had to walk away from the computer for like an hour, and I just re-read that line. It seemed less inappropriate when I typed it.)
Ana
* * * *
Date: April 5, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: Re: The scoop
PR would definitely explain why you make the rest of us trying to promote Decrepit Moon look like morons. Now, if I’d known you were a ringer, I would’ve insisted on e-mailing you a lot sooner than this. As it is, I’m going to have to settle for being the one who knows your dark and dirty secret.
*ponders that carefully*
That actually works for me. *wink*
You’re promoting a book? And you think *my* job sounds interesting?!? You haven’t slept, right?
Speaking of sleeping, which answer about women and chains is going to convince you to chat with me instead of using e-mail? Think of it as the ultimate distraction. Real time instead of having to wait the hour or so for me to shoot an e-mail back.
Ben
* * * *
Date: April 5, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Re: The scoop
Actually, I haven’t slept. I’ll sleep when I get this project done. That’s what I keep telling myself, anyway. Barring that, I’ll sleep in May. My annual vacation just happens to correspond with the next Moon concert in LA. Funny how that worked out, huh? *wink*
I don’t know if chat is such a good idea. The last thing I need right now is the ultimate distraction. But I might be more tempted (though I admit, I’m already pretty tempted) to chat with you if you like strong women to use chains on you. Just because I like a guy who can admit it. *laughs*
Ana
* * * *
Date: April 7, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: Sorry
Hey Ana,
Sorry about bailing on being your distraction. The department head arrived after I got your last e-mail and pulled me into a meeting, and then Thursdays are my long days here on campus. I’m sure you don’t care about the mundane details of my life or how incredibly stupid I was with my scheduling this term, but I don’t want you to think you might have scared me off. Nothing could be further from the truth.
How did your deadline go? And did the bootlegs arrive yet? I worry about these kind of things. Snail mail sucks.
Crap. A student is here. It’s not even a pretty one. Gotta go.
Ben
* * * *
Date: April 7, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Got it!
Hi Ben,
Guess what was waiting for me when I got home tonight?! I’m listening to the CD right now, and God, could they sound more amazing live? You know, I wasn’t even interested in the band until a friend dragged me to a concert. Then it was like a religious experience or something.
And I’m afraid I squee’ed like travis’s_butterfly when I saw the autographed placard. *hangs head* I guess I’m a fangirl at heart. I should be too old for that by now.
Anyway, the project went great and I got it in an hour before the deadline. The client loves it. Everybody’s really excited about it. So I’m celebrating with a glass (ok maybe a bottle) of wine. It seems fitting.
Ana
* * * *
Date: April 7, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: Re: Got it!
Too old? No such thing. If you’ve got a passion for something, why let something as superficial as age stop you from enjoying it to the fullest?
Wine and Decrepit Moon playing in the background? Ah, a woman after my own heart. The only thing missing are chicken taquitos from this great little Mexican place around the corner from my apartment. I’m assuming you have the weekend off? Any plans? It has to be better than the stack of tests I have to grade.
Ben
* * * *
Date: April 7, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Re: Got it!
Well, I didn’t have any specific plans, but now I think they should include chicken taquitos. Or a chimichanga. Or nachos. Hmmm, now I’m hungry. Thank God for delivery, because I’m not driving anywhere tonight.
Wait, I lied. I do have big plans for the weekend. I’m going to wash my car, weed my lawn, and clean up my office. Which does sound better than grading math tests, I have to admit. Will it be my turn to act as a distraction?
Ana
PS: You never answered my question.
* * * *
Date: April 7, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: Re: Got it!
What question? *scans through inbox* You mean, the chains? Using them on me, of course. I did mention I hated the damsel, didn’t I? lol
Does this mean you’ll chat with me now? I’m told I give very good chat. *wink*
Distract me. Please!
Ben, waiting expectantly
* * * *
Date: April 7, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Re: Got it!
Ben,
I don’t think I can chat tonight. The keyboard feels very small and my fingers feel very big. Think it’s the wine? It is taking me forever to type this email. I’d drive you crazy in chat.
I’ve tried to think of a polite way to ask, but I haven’t been able to work it into the conversation gracefully. Do you have a girlfriend…or a boyfriend? (Not that there’s anything wrong with that! But it wouldn’t be the first time).
Ana, looking for another bottle of wine
* * * *
Date: April 7, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Re: Got it!
Girlfriend? No. Boyfriend. Still no.
How about we play our own version of 20 questions? So you don’t have to worry about whether it’s polite to ask or not. You ask me any 5 questions you want, and I promise to answer as truthfully as I can. Then I’ll ask you. I’ll trust you to play fair, lol.
Ben, who’s really hoping you’ll play
* * * *
Date: April 7, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: 5 questions
Or is it only four since I already asked you a question?
Hmmm. Let me think of some good ones.
Do any of your students have a crush on you? Youngish teacher, good sense of humor, awesome taste in music…
Did you grow up in Los Angeles?
What’s your favorite wine?
How old were you when you lost your virginity?
Ana
* * * *
Date: April 7, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: Re: 5 questions
1. Yes. And you forgot, easy grader. Especially when I’m being so pleasantly distracted.
2. Nope, I moved to LA to attend UCLA. Loved it so much that I stuck around to teach. I’m originally from Toledo.
3. I like reds, but I’m going to let my age show here and admit I don’t know a whole lot about them. I’m always looking for a good teacher, though.
4. I was 17. Her name was Megan, and we’d been dating since the beginning of junior year. We agreed to have s*x, I made all these arrangements for a romantic night at my house a weekend my parents were away, and then the following Monday, she broke up with me. She said she’d been doing a test for herself, to see if her feelings really had changed for me. Turned out the answer was yes.
My turn for questions…
1. What’s your most prized possession?
2. What color are your eyes? Sorry. This is a personal weakness of mine.
3. What’s your favorite s****l position?
4. If you could say anything to me right now, what would it be and why?
And since that last question is technically two, I’ll stop there.
Ben
* * * *
Date: April 7, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Re: 5 questions
1. About nine years ago, Neil was in a band called Mango Quest. You might have heard of them, though they weren’t a band for long. It was sort of like a nursery for the Indie scene. Neil on lead guitar, Brock Jenkins on drums, Jack Bender on bass, and Johnny Jeffs singing lead (I still can’t believe they were all in the same band…) Anyway, they did one album together. I caught them on tour, bought their album, had them sign it after the show, and two days later, they broke up.
2. Brown.
3. Standing. From behind.
4. I’d love to teach you about wine, because drinking alone isn’t that much fun. Also that Megan sounds like a bit of a jerk. But I guess she has the excuse of being 17. My husband pulled the same thing on me, and he did not have the excuse of being 17.
Ana
* * * *
Date: April 7, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: Re: 5 questions
You mean ex-husband. Because if I find out that the brown-eyed woman I’ve been fantasizing about all week is married, it’ll be…well, it’ll be even hotter because of the whole wrong badness of it all, but still.
Ex. Please tell me it’s ex.
Ben
* * * *
Date: April 7, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Ex
He’s very, very, very ex. Though now that you mention the whole wrong badness of it all, I wish I met you two years ago.
Ana
* * * *
Date: April 7, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: Re: Ex
You’re killing me here. If I find out you’re tall, too, I’m a goner.
Ben
* * * *
Date: April 7, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Re: Ex
5’10”. Are you tall enough for my favorite position?
Ana
* * * *
Date: April 7, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: Re: Ex
6’3”
My wall, or yours?
Ben
* * * *
Date: April 8, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: I’m Sorry
Hey Ben,
I almost didn’t write this email. And then I re-read our exchange last night, and I almost just canceled my Internet subscription so that sort of thing never happens again. Yes, it would be easier to cut back on the wine, but I never said the decision was reasonable.
But before I cut myself off completely from the online world, I thought I’d email and apologize for my behavior. First, I had no right to pry into your personal life. So I’m sorry for those three questions (four if you count the last one about how tall you are, and I do). And I’m sorry for distracting you from your work.
Also, I never cheated on my husband. And I would never cheat on anybody. I’m not a cheater. Even if maybe it is a little hot.
Anyway, I’m going to hide under the bed and sleep off the rest of this hangover. So much for cleaning and gardening today, huh?
If I promise not to indulge in any more drunken emailing, will you still talk to me?
Have a good weekend,
Ana
* * * *
Date: April 9, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: Re: I’m Sorry
Dear Ana,
Please don’t be sorry. I’m not. The only thing I regret is that you feel bad about it now. It was fun, and I practically begged you to e-mail me so that I could get out of grading my tests. Well, I practically begged for more reasons than that, but I don’t want to make you feel more uncomfortable than you already do.
Time to be honest here. I would still want to talk to you if you were a midget sumo wrestler retired in Greenland. You are the most eloquent, engaging woman I’ve met in a very long time. Does it help that you’re 5’10” and have brown eyes? Let’s put it this way. I was charmed long before I knew how tall you were. The other stuff is just window dressing. Very, very nice window dressing, but still.
I didn’t write back yesterday because a) you said you were sleeping off your hangover and I didn’t want to bother you, and b) I wanted to get all my grading done so that you wouldn’t worry about being a distraction any more. I didn’t even turn on the tv and there was an MST3k marathon on, so go me on the restraint. But I’m done now, and you should be home—unless you’re out in your garden already—and I’m hoping you’re not too embarrassed to e-mail me back. I like you, Ana. Don’t let a bottle of wine and my insatiable curiosity about you put a stop to what I think could be a beautiful friendship.
Ben
* * * *
Date: April 9, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Re: I’m Sorry
Ben,
You’re very sweet. Everything seemed much worse yesterday, when I had an elephant using my skull for a tympani. But I’m feeling much better now, as they used to say on Night Court. Well, I still can’t believe some of the things I wrote, but I’m sure I’m not the only one who got a loose tongue (or loose fingers) when drunk.
I’m going to spend the day indoors. The weeding can wait, and it’s surprisingly cold outside. I’m glad you got your grading done. What have you got planned for the day?
Ana
* * * *
Date: April 9, 2007
To: ana_moon
From: bj_scalia
Subject: Re: I’m Sorry
Knowing you’re going to be in all day? Talking to you.
What are the odds of talking you into chatting today? I’m here, you’re here, there’s no work that requires our full attention. We won’t have to worry about delayed gratification then.
Ben
* * * *
Date: April 9, 2007
To: bj_scalia
From: ana_moon
Subject: Re: I’m Sorry
Ok. But you’ll have to tell me what to do. I’ve never chatted with anybody before.
Ana
- Writer
