Touched

Ep.5

With the remaining strength I had left, I pushed open the door and threw myself out.

I knew they were coming after me, I could feel them. And I didn't have to look back.

But I couldn't stay there any longer. I couldn't stay in the same place as them. I couldn't look at their faces. All concerned with a slight tint of innocence.

I felt like my lungs were on fire, as if the air in the room had run out. The humming in my head was increasing with each passing second and the restlessness grew inside me.

I wanted to get away from here, but my body was not following my orders. My heart was beating faster than ever before, and not for long, I fell onto the ground in the middle of the garden as I could barely move my legs.

With the shock of the fall, tears began to flow down my cheeks, and I realized that it was a heavier load than I could bear. My body was starting to come to its senses because I didn't take my medication this morning, but with these new sensations, I did not feel excited. I felt scared. I felt alone.

What he said shouldn't be true, but somehow it fits perfectly with everything I've ever experienced till now. All those attacks I've been through, the drugs I've been taking for years, my body's reactions, and what happened last night...What seemed like a bad dream to me... It was the reality. I was passed out when they found me half-transformed in the middle of the forest.

The familiar hand that touched my shoulder, once my safest place, my shelter, was the last person I wanted to see right now.

He had been hiding the truth from me my whole life, knowing how bad the medicines were making me feel, and deceived me when I had no disease at all.

I didn't know who to trust when everything I believed in was falling apart one by one.

"Valeri, please-"

"Stay away from me!" I pushed him away.

I could see the pain and surprise in his eyes as he stumbled backward with my strength. Behind him, I could hear the heartbeats of the hunters who had just stepped into the garden. I was aware that they were prepared to intervene in any situation when they brought their hands to their weapons on their waists.

I had trained with them for years, and many of them had trained me. I could predict each move they would make, but there was a difference now. This time they were not going to hold back, they would harm me. It wouldn't be like in the training sessions because I was the target now. I was the enemy.

"I didn't mean to -"

Other hunters surrounded my fallen father, keeping a distance between us to prevent me from approaching him. How could they think that, of course, I wasn't going to hurt him. That was out of the question.

"Just as a precaution, Valeri." Even Mr. Durham had moved away from his usual cheerful & relaxed demeanor, he was serious. Behind him, I could see George fidgeting uneasily, trying to stay calm but not making any eye contact with me.

"I know, Valeri. I know you wouldn't intentionally hurt anyone."

"You've been deceiving me for years, all of you," I said, glancing over the people one by one, who I once thought were my family. Even though it wasn't always loving, we had a moment with all of them. They lied to me by looking at my face all my life. They kept me away from society and did not take me to important meetings or missions because I was ill, because I was a girl.

It was getting harder and harder to ignore the resentment I was building inside as all the taboos fell into place one by one.

It was as if someone was pushing all the air out of my lungs by pressing against my chest. The feeling of being left out I've been feeling all these years was because I didn't belong here.

"At first we didn't know."

"We had no choice if they had found you, had smelled you—"

"Look at me!" then I pulled the sleeve of my shirt up to show the bruises and marks left by the countless injections I had.

My voice came out louder than I expected. Even though I didn't want to, I knew something was awakening inside.

"I know, Valeri. I know." Moore lifted himself off the ground and pulled the men standing in front of him aside.

"You have no idea how much this upsets me." There he was looking at me with those familiar soft brown eyes. Eyes that protected me in from everyone, or so I think.

"What about my family?"

"Did you kill them too? Did you want to use me for the hunters' sake, and-"

"You know I wouldn't do such a thing!" I could see how hurt he was. But I ignored it, I was raging, not caring about his feelings.

At that time, an unexpected voice behind me made me startle.

"Mija, it's true what they say," Isabel was approaching me, emerging from the protection of the men who were almost twice her size. "Because I found you."

I didn't want to believe her, but there she was, the embodiment of the concept of mother for me.

When Isabel came close to me to hold me in her arms, I couldn't help the tears that flowed down my cheeks.

When her hand touched my shoulder, I felt the anger subsiding a little. Isabel's soothing mood has always made me feel good.

"It was too late when I saw your mother in the rain, but you-"

I could see her eyes fill with tears.

"You were so small when I pulled you out of her belly that it was hard to believe you were a wolf." She was consoling me and I wanted to learn it all by looking right through her eyes.

"But no doubt that you took your mother's wild beauty, her red hair..."

Every word that reached my ears was causing me more pain than I could imagine. I was listening to the death of my mother.

"When I took you to my cabin, it didn't take long for the wolves to find your scent, it was a bloodbath, and the guards—"

The Wolf council ambassadors had arrived at us, who had been waiting silently among the other men:

"By the time we felt what had happened, it was too late for everything." they tapped my shoulder, saying,

"You had to grow up in a safe place, and that was nearly impossible at the time. If they'd known you were alive, Kyril would –"

"Maybe that could be a story for another day." The green-eyed man continued to speak.

"Let's meet first"

"I am Alaric, Beta of the Royal Pack, and this is-"

He pointed to the man who hadn't taken his brown eyes off me since he arrived.

“Colton, I come from the fertile land of the south.” Alaric rolled his eyes and Colton ignored that look.

"At the age of 18, the wolf within you has completed its transformation. It is grown. Now you need to return to your pack, Valeri. Where you belong awaits your return. Take your place as the leader and - "

"Alaric, don't you think you're going a little too fast? She should be under our watch for some time."

I knew more or less about what they were saying from what I had heard at council meetings. But overall I was confused.

"I can hear your heartbeat rising, Valeri. It is good, it will clear your blood faster from the effects of wolfbane."

Wolfsbane?

It wasn't medicine or drugs that I was getting all these years.

It was pure poison for my species.

I was feeling too hot, while everyone around me was wearing a jacket, I felt like I was going to melt at any moment with my thin cardigan.

“I know your wolf is restless,” Colton said, taking a few steps closer to me. Even though I wanted to back away, my body wouldn't obey me, and the fire radiating from my shoulder made me take a deep breath as Colton's hand touched me there.

He noticed it too, and never took his eyes off mine.

"I was the closest person to your father, and it's my duty to protect you from now on. To teach you our ways and our culture at all costs."

As Colton's words echoed in my head, the restlessness within me began to subside a little.

"Colton, it may be good for her to spend this period on royal lands. Finding a mate for the pack as soon as possible will keep her wolf in balance. So—"

"Mate?"

George and I couldn't hide our surprise with the words that fell from our lips at the same time. From the first moment he saw me, he had been avoiding me and hadn't said a word. But now has he decided to talk?

"What mate?"

Isabel interrupted, trying to calm my father.

"Wolves... it is said that when they start to live, a mate is created for each. The moon goddess sends all their soul mates to earth, and their souls can not find peace till they find their other half."

"Sometimes they won't, they could select one, but one must be sure before accepting a selected mate to bond."

"Usually, after your wolf completes its transformation completely, once in a year on the full moon you will feel the heat, till you find your mate."

It might be quite disturbing for you since your wolf has been suppressed for a lot of time now. But worry not, on the upcoming ritual there is a high probability that you will find your mate. All the packs are gathering after a long time."

George took a step towards me as his eyes locked on mine ready to declare his possession and Colton's growl sent both of us pinned to the ground.

"Don't even take another step, kid," he said, sniffing the air. "Your smell on her is irritating enough,"

As I was unable to keep my cheeks from turning red, I tried to calm myself, trying not to think about what happened last night or the mate and bond stories. Like he knew what happened last night, Colton's voice got higher within seconds:

"You don't belong here, Valeri. You have a pack and lands to manage and it's suffered enough in your absence!"

"Colton-"

As Colton's roar echoed through the air, I could hear the neighbors waking up and getting out of their gardens. They naturally wondered what was causing so much noise at this hour in the morning.

"Maybe we should continue this conversation indoors."

Isabel pointed to the people who started to come outside. "It would be better for the safety of all of us."

"And we'll have a cup of chamomile tea to calm your nerves." She grabbed my hand and guided me inside without any hesitation that all the men would follow us.

Behind me, I could hear two wolves arguing in low voices. They did not agree on what to do. But Colton's sudden outbursts bothered me. As if he hadn't been scrutinizing me since he arrived, he had an anger towards me that I didn't understand.

Even the chamomile tea that Isabel prepared could not ease the tension within the house.

Discussions have been going on ever since we walked in. Colton and Alaric had listened to the hunters patiently and then started to come up with arguments that would "possibly" be the best thing to do with me.

My father, Liam, was the leader of a peaceful pack in the fertile lands of the south, as Colton said. After his death, Roden, who is said as my cousin, rose to the leadership position, ramping things up for his pleasure, and the land was no longer as rich as it once was. By the time I turned eighteen, I was supposed to claim my rightful place in the lead, but apparently, Roden had other plans.

“Alpha Roden wants her back in the pack.” Despite being angry and outspoken, Colton was loyal to his leader, clearly following his orders without question, even though he knew he was making bad decisions.

"We both know about Roden's plans, Colton. For that, she has to be ready first. A pack doesn't accept a leader that quickly."

"She has to challenge him and gain the lead so everyone can accept that she's Liam's daughter. She can't earn the respect of the Pack any other way."

After wrinkling his nose in disgust, he continued, "especially after this scent on her."

"Perhaps you can stay with me on the mountain side for a while. At least until your body is cleansed of the wolfsbane, and in the meantime you could have time to learn about the culture." Then Isabel refreshed the tea in the wolves' glasses. "First of all, she's just a kid who just turned 18."

"Wolfs at her age lead the packs." Colton sipped his tea while showing his disgust. His demeanor was starting to get on my nerves.

"What is wrong with you?"

He must not have expected me to react like this, for the momentary expression of surprise on his face turned into anger.

"What's wrong with me?!" He pointed to the hunters around.

“You grew up with hunters all your life, you're a part of them and they are a part of you!" He harshly grabbed my wrists.

“You have the blood of my brothers on your hands.”

I knew he was right when he said it.

“And now you will come and lead Liam's pack. I told them leaving you here all along was wrong. We shouldn't have left you here.”

Before I knew what was going on, there was a sudden confusion as George threw himself at Colton.

I knew Colton could tear George apart in a matter of seconds with his claws sticking out.

"Cut this bullshit right now."

Neither of them was listening to me, even Colton's hands turning into half-claws dangerous enough as his face tightened. I knew it would be a disaster for him to undergo a complete transformation. Was that how I was last night, like a wild animal? Had I lost myself? Is that why I couldn't remember?

As George swung his dagger at Colton, the wolf moved way quicker than I expected him to. I heard the sound of the flesh being torn, him grunting and the smell around me started to turn my head as George leaned back holding his chest.

The smell of fresh blood… It made me sick to my stomach.

Alaric and the other hunters who had appeared next to them had gotten in between the two of them, keeping them away from each other so that the situation would not escalate. When I tried to walk towards him, I started to feel worse.

As the pain in my head grew more and more, I realized that something was wrong when things started to blur. When I waved my hand to the side to hold on to someone, it was Isabel who came to my aid, trying to keep me up by taking my arm, but I was aware that she wouldn't be able to continue for long.

"Calm down, Mija."

"Sit down and rest, and I'll take a look at George's wound." After saying that, she put me on the chair and walked over to George, pushing the big men around her.

Our gazes locked through, there was an emotion in his blue eyes that I had never seen before. I wanted to say something to him, but I didn't know what to say. I didn't know how to act.

But there was only one thing I knew.

If I didn't learn to control myself, I would be sure to be a threat to everyone. After Isabel had tightly bandaged George's chest in a matter of minutes, everyone calmed down a bit. Alaric stood by Colton's side just in case, and we both knew that this group wouldn't survive another event.

Within a few minutes, when the heated discussion started again, I knew what I had to do. When I got up from my seat, I could feel eyes on me.

"I will go."

Everyone in the room fell silent for an instant. "Me being here brings everyone into danger. And if what you say is true-"

Alaric and Colton nodded as they listened carefully to me. "There are people who need me."

"But it's still too early for that."

I was aware that my eyes were starting to get wet as my father approached me anxiously.

"It doesnt matter, I've lost so much without even knowing who they were till now. It's time to get to know myself, learn the truth. I can't let them down when they need me."

They knew I was right. It was the first time my speeches were taken so seriously. If my life wasn't at the end of the line, maybe I'd like this situation. Even though it scared me that I was going to leave everything I used to, everyone, my life here, I knew that I had to discover myself. I had to learn my skills, to know my family, my ancestors, where I belong.

"But I have a condition."