Her gentle Beast

Her brothers

 *Isadora*

 I have to admit I am still kinda relieved when the last guests are ushered out a little past midnight and the front door is locked. Me and the other workers in the bar starts putting the chairs up on the tables, making cleaning the floors much easier and faster.

 About half an hour later we all step out into the alley behind the bar through the back door. Sam locks the door, before saying his farewells and disappearing up the stairs to the rooms above the bar where he lives.

 As everyone else wishes me a good night and scurries off, I wander up to the front street, where my youngest brother Castor will normally be waiting for me. He picks me up every night. This city is not a safe place for a woman to walk around alone at night, especially not one who has grown up in the protective environment of a pack.

 But when I reach the street and see he is not there waiting for me, worries start blooming in my stomach. He is never late, which had been a bit of a surprise to me, as the second son in the family he never had much responsibility and has spent most of his life having fun with friends. But he has really stepped up.

 The streetlamps around here do very little to keep the shadows at bay. I look around nervously. There are some people in the distance, it looks like a couple. But they are walking away from me. No, my brother must be here soon.

 Please let him be okay, while he is capable of handling himself and has of course been trained in combat I am unsure if it is enough dealing with the rogues and criminals of this city. It is just so very different from our former life, and no one sticks to the rules we grew up with.

 Making a quick decision I pull my jacket closer around me and start walking towards our small home, hoping I will meet him on the way there. After ten hours of working most of my body is aching and I just want to get home.

 Thinking it instantly makes me realize that I will never go home again, not really home. I have no home … we have no home … it was taken from us. Where we live is no home, it is just a roof over our head, and barely even that.

 Suddenly I feel cold chills run down my back, and all the little hairs perk up. Like someone running a ringer up my spine. I quickly whip around.

 The couple I had spotted is almost out of view now, so it can’t be their gaze I am feeling. I am not actually feeling in danger, but I can’t shake the feeling of someone watching me.

 But I see nothing but shadows and hear nothing but the faint skitter of rats.

 I reach into my ragged backpack and pull out the small knife that my oldest brother Dimos had given me and taught me to use for self defense before he had left us.  Wish I knew where he is these days. I doubt the small knife will kill anyone, but it might make an attacker think twice if it is worth it.

 It is probably just my mind playing tricks on me. Until three months ago my life had been protected in a way I never realised. Daughter of a beta, living on pack grounds with servants and friends and no danger. Always having food and clothes and everything else I could want for.

 I have never had to think about where it was safe to walk or the risk of being attacked. I have had to rethink everything. To become vigilant and always have my eyes on things. I hate worrying, I hate being poor, I hate not knowing if things will ever be good again. It might be a spoiled and entitled way of thinking, but I had always assumed that my life would forever be blessed , without real care and filled with laughter and fun.

 When I turn again I gasp loudly, and almost squeal as I find Castor only a few steps away from me. I am happy I managed to swallow it, had I screamed it would have annoyed me greatly. “Where the fudge have you been ?”

 He ducks his sandy blonde head, looking like he does indeed feel guilty. “Sorry. I was kinda busy and forgot the time”.

 “Busy ? Doing what ?”

 “Nothing you should worry about. Let's get you home”. He steps up to me, placing a hand protectively on my shoulder. Just like me he has learned to pay attention to everything. And his head is constantly moving slightly, scanning the surroundings.

 When we lived in the pack he had hardly given me the time of day. He was busy with friends, fun and sports and I was just the annoying baby sister. I was never really close with any of my brothers. The oldest, Dimos, is five years my senior, Castor three. They are men, to them I am still a girl. We never seemed to have anything in common, besides coming from the same family.

 Suddenly, as we start walking down the street, I realise that the feeling of being watched has melted away into nothing.

 I discreetly look over my shoulder. Has there been someone there watching me, and has Castor’s arrival scared them off ?

 “Did you see anyone when you arrived, someone lurking around ?” I ask my brother.

 “I said I was sorry for being late”. He starts, clearly thinking it was an accusation but when I give him a pointed look he continues. “No, I saw no one near enough to be of danger to you. I miss having a f*****g car”.

 I have never in all of my life heard him curse. Not saying he didn’t in the company of his friends, but he never did in front of me. But now, after we had to leave the pack it happens more and more often. But I get him, a car would be nice right now.

 But we do what we need to, moving forward until we reach the shabby little townhouse we are leasing the ground floor of. The second floor sounds like it inhabits a family of bear shifters.

 Castor unlocks the door and pushes it open, letting me walk inside first. We have not been able to afford power and gas so we are getting by with candles, oil lamps and an old wood stove both for warmth and cooking. Had you asked me half a year ago I had no idea that anyone lived like this.

 “It looks like Dimos has been here”. Castor says, going to pick up a parcel from the table. It is wrapped in paper, secured with a rough string. Opening it it contains a bag of flour and a bag of rice, along with some money. “This will help us get through a week or two”.

 “Why does he have to act so mysteriously ? He could just come actually visit us, instead of sneaking in when we are not here to leave us stuff”.

 When we were kicked out of the pack and lost everything, he had taken care of things and gotten us this house, if it can be called that. But as soon as we had settled in he had simply disappeared. I haven’t seen him since.

 “It is safer this way, for everyone”.

 “But as always you won’t tell me what it is he is doing, right ?” It’s not like it’s the first time I ask.

 “I can’t tell you what I don’t know. It’s not like he shares any details with me”. It’s what he always says, I have a feeling it’s not the full truth though.

 “But it’s something dangerous … I know that much”. I can’t help but worry for my oldest brother.

 Castor sighs. “It’s getting rather late, Isa, and I have to be at work early. I need to get to bed”.

 “Just let me check your hands first”.

 “It’s not necessary”.

 “Castor, if they get infected it could end badly, real badly. And where would we be then ?”

 He looks like he is about to roll his eyes at me, then he lets out a sigh that makes me think he should take to the stage and in the end he nods.

 I keep my jacket on to ward off the cold. There is no reason to start a fire as we are about to go to bed. Then I fill some water in a bowl, grab some clean rags and a salve. When I join him at the table he is removing the bandages I had put on this morning.

 “They are looking better”. He says softly. “The perks of fast healing”.

 His work is hard, and we can’t afford good gloves to protect his hand. The lifting and hauling heavy crates onto the trains has left his hands torn and blistered. And as he repeats it every day, even being a wolf and healing fast is not enough. His, before so, soft hands are becoming rough and calloused.

 “Oh by the way I got a big tip from a man today”. I say as I start cleaning the blisters.

 “Why ?” The mistrust drips from his voice. He is scared to believe anyone would want just to be friendly.

 “For my pretty smile ?”

 He smiles warmly. “It has been known to know men off their feet”.

 I had once been everyone's darling, admired and many Young men were hoping to have me as their mate. The lucky one had been Chad, the son of a Beta and likely to become Beta himself in the future. Our wedding was already being planned when everything happened.

 I shake my head to let go of the memories. “I’ll give you the money”.

 “Keep it. You never know when you might have a need for it”.

 “I want to pay for our home too”. That’s why I am working. To feel useful and not just freeloading. Also we need the money.

 At first I have been keeping the little house, cooking and taking care of Castor’s clothes, and while it was certainly a new challenge for me, it had not taken much of my day, and I had started getting bored.

 “Keep it for now, as our emergency fund. I’ll let you know if I need it”.

 I do appreciate him wanting to be sweet and protective, but I do want to be seen as an equal in this. I mean I can’t imagine him telling Dimos not to bring us more money, but he won’t take mine. 

 I let go of his hands, now newly bandaged. “Here you go, good as new”.

 He gives me one of those dazzling Castor smiles. “Not really, but thanks for making it better”. He stands up. “Can you take the lamp ?”

 I am not sure why he is asking me. We do this every night, it is like a ritual. Walking to the hallway were he turns to the right and me to the left. I always wait with the lamp in hand until he has closed his door behind him, even though he says he doesn’t need it, that he is comfortable in the dark. After he enters his room I will go to my own and try to ignore the melancholy that always seems to wash over me as I enter the bare room with the pile of blankets serving as my bed.

 I know that things will never go back to how they used to be, but I have to believe that with time and hard work our lives will improve.

 Putting the lamp on the floor I shrug out of my clothes and change into my nightdress. Then I let down my hair and brush it gently, before planting it for sleep. Just as I am about to get into bed I remember the money and get it from my pocket. I room it up and put it in the small box I hide under my pillow. Then I bury myself in the blankets, hoping for a calm night.

 Closing my eyes and thinking back to the evening I am torn between hope that this Beast guy will return, and hoping I will never see him again. He seemed to have looked right through me and it unsettles me.

 What would he say if he finds out I am the cursed daughter of a traitorous Beta?