Behind the Mask

13. Losing her

Liv

After waking up, I went to do some queen work, taking in the fact that all those noisy little bundles were sound asleep. 

I was trying so hard to focus on the Hell’s sentences in my hands that I just noticed him when he was only a few steps away. 

“My love, come closer,” he told me. 

I stood up immediately as if I was entranced by his fresh forest scent and my legs closed the distance between us inadvertently. I could already feel my skin growing hot and my body becoming pliant at his husky voice only.

He crashed his lips on mine in a possessive kiss, caressing my tongue with his and nibbling my bottom lip before his moistened hot lips went down my neck. I co.cked my head to the side, giving him better access. 

“Elric,” a soft moan escaped my trembling lips. 

Wait? I snapped back from this hazy and all that happened yesterday struck me like thunder. 

“No, I don’t want you!” I tried to move away and pushed my palms against his chest, but he didn’t let me go off his arms. 

“Darling, haven’t you already understood that I don’t care about what you want?” he murmured in my ear, pulling me even closer to him. 

I gasped, my heart fell and a wave of nausea crept in my stomach. 

What did he want to do? His grasp around my waist became even tighter and he made my clothes disappear.

“No, no, no!” I started hyperventilating and woke up with a jolt, screaming out loud. 

Dang, it! 

It was a dream, a nightmare. 

I was safe in Avalon’s arms, nested in his embrace. He turned to look at me, his eyes opened widely in worry. 

Next, I heard a piercing crying, noticing that Zo was on the other side of Avalon’s chest. He was sleeping with both of us in his arms. 

I patted my baby’s back softly, trying to calm the poor boy down. After his cries were replaced by cute cooing noises, my mate looked at me. 

“Liv, what happened?” Avalon asked, placing two fingers under my chin and making me look at him. 

“It was nothing. A nightmare… I just don’t know who Elric is anymore, I feel used. A means to achieve a goal. And what they did to mom... I can’t stop thinking about it. I have to go see her, check if she is okay.” 

I knew, or at least I hoped that Elric wouldn’t ever… I huffed. I didn’t know a thing anymore. 

Avalon exhaled deeply, “I am very worried about her too and we should definitely go to see her. But you have only slept for a bit more than an hour. You have been going for so long without sleeping, rest first, else you won’t be able to help her properly.” 

I nodded, “Okay, just a couple more hours,” I sighed, feeling the heaviness of my eyelids. It really felt like a baby Dumbo was on top of them! 

Avalon’s words between Zo’s gurgling were the last thing I heard before slipping into the world of dreams. 

“Sleep well, my Little Fire. Know that I won’t ever let anything happen to you or to Mel.” 

~ * ~

Maximus

I was thinking about us, remembering all that happened, over and over. It was some sort of self-inflicted tortur.e, to remember my mistakes from the past. 

After Melinda was taken to my Villa the first time, I sent her a letter, asking her to come to meet me, but months passed and she never came. 

She resisted the absurd idea of being with someone she never saw, as any rational person would. Until love and fear make us lose our reasoning. 

***

“Goddess, it has already been more than 6 months. What if she doesn’t come back?” My normally very serene best friend, and King, was pacing around his office. I’ve rarely seen him that tense.

His future, the future of the Elf Realm, of the whole Six Realms was at stake.

“She will,” I answered with a sharp exhale. 

I was also stressed, anxious, about it, not only because of everything that was at stake. But also because of Melinda. I missed her. I had to see her, inhale her scent, have her in my arms. Staying so long without her was painful. 

She should have been feeling it too, or at least something. She will come back.

“You shouldn’t have let her go. You should have kept her in your Vila Maximus.” Elric inhaled deeply.

“I couldn’t keep my mate here against her will, as a prisoner. In fact, I was sure you would agree with me on that.”

Elric ran his hands through his hair in exasperation.

“Normally I would. But there isn’t anything normal about this situation.” He kept pacing frantically, before stopping for a moment and turning his gaze towards me. “I’m so sorry. I agree with you. You did it right.” He muttered.

~ * ~

I forced my mind to stop wandering about past mistakes. I had to find her, to talk to her. To try and leave the past behind in an attempt to have a future, a future with her.  

I wanted to give Melinda time to process everything, the dreadful truth. However, time was never a helping factor in our story, in our relationship. I couldn’t waste more time, by being without her, by leaving her in deep solitude. 

I was looking for her in Avalon’s castle and realm until I finally found her in Lea’s house. 

I knocked on Alexander’s nursery, from where Melida’s honey scent was oozing. 

“Melinda, I’ve been looking for you everywhere,” I said before greeting Lea. 

She only nodded in acknowledgment. Our relationship hasn’t been the best since she confronted me about what I said regarding Alexus. 

I only wanted to protect her, it wasn’t easy to see my underage daughter naked, bleeding, and about to be violated by that male. She could forgive him, but I couldn’t. 

Lea, “mom, I will leave you guys alone, okay?” Lea asked her, after she took her son in her arms. 

“It’s fine, sweetie,” Melinda replied, patting Lea’s shoulder gently. 

She left before she spared a single sad look at me. I was losing everything, everyone. But I was glad that I could finally talk to Melinda without anyone’s interference, just the two of us. 

“Maximus…” she sighed my name. 

Her eyes looked dull. She was happier before it, before knowing it. 

“That’s why I didn’t want to tell you, Melinda. To not hurt you even further, to not hurt us,” I muttered, taking a few steps closer to her. 

She swallowed hard, audibly. 

“Are you listening to yourself? Hiding things under the carpet and concealing the truth for decades is what hurt me! Lying and hiding isn’t a way to fix your mistakes, but rather of making new ones!” she flushed slightly, her words coming out with anger. 

I looked away for an instant, I knew she was right. She had the right to know, but was it worth all the pain? 

“What can I do to make it better? To make you feel better? I would do anything, my beloved,” I added, my eyes traveling back to her, and my legs leading me in her direction. 

“I don’t know. Answer me honestly, what were you planning to do? To keep the truth from me forever?” 

I exhaled sharply. “I didn’t plan anything, I only wanted you, a way to your forgiveness. To start over again.” my words conveyed what I actually thought and felt. 

I didn’t plan or calculate anything. 

“You can’t wipe away all that happened, Maximus,” she breathed, her big blue eyes fixed on mine, moistened with unshed tears.  

I would give everything to go back in time and take her in my arms the night I saw her for the first time in the Multispecies Bar, tell her that I wanted her, and make her mine. Mine forever. 

“I know. I wish I would have done everything differently. In the end Elric, the peace, the realms... it ... they don’t feel like they matter more than you.” I was fidgeting as a nervous young Elf. 

I was anxious, I feared. I regretted it. 

“Only words do not suffice,” Melinda said, looking away again. 

I would do anything for her, much more than words, anything. 

“What can I do to earn your forgiveness, my beloved? Please give me a chance to do it right, be the mate you deserve and a good father for our babies. Let me show you that I love you, every day,” my words had the desperation of a plea. I took a few more steps closer, but she moved away abruptly. 

“I don’t know if I can if I have a place in my heart to once again turn my back to everything you have done. I don’t know if I can or if I want to. Maybe I am better off if I let go.”

“Melinda, please.” I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. 

“You can mark me, we solidify our bond completely. The bond’s magic will help you to heal your heartache, will help your relationship to heal.” 

She let out a quiet pearl of a humourless laugh. 

“Think about me for once and do not insist, allow me to let it go of you and all the pain you entail. Keep your distance as you used to, and let me be, gone and free,” she asked, her normally gentle eyes were two blue abysms of intensity. 

“I... will...” I exhaled sharply, rubbing my face in aggravation as tears stung down my eyes. 

“I love you, Melinda,” I muttered almost inaudibly. 

I flashed away, as she asked me too, leaving her alone. 

Have I lost her? Have all my fears come true?