Chambers Lane Series Collection

1. Jose Luis-3

“Junior, you didn"t listen to me when I told you to get a full time job and to settle down with that girl from your church. What was her name? Yolanda? Yes, you liked her and her three kids. She liked you a lot and wanted to marry you. Why didn"t you marry her like you said you would?”

“She was a hypocrite. She would text guys all the time flirting with them, claim that she was just friends. But if I texted a woman, she would get jealous and angry and claimed I was having s*x with the woman. She was the one who was cheating. Maybe not sexually, but at least emotionally. She would keep promising to stop texting those guys, but I would see her texting them and then she would get mad at me if I told her about it. She would first deny it and promise me again that she wouldn"t text them. Then she would say that I was trying to control her and prevent her from having any male friends. She would always bring up how her ex cheated on her with another woman from church and how she didn"t feel beautiful or loved…”

Jose Luis could talk for hours repeating the same story over and over again. Asking the same questions ad nauseum. Did she like me? Should I be with her? Does she love me? I love her kids, but will they respect me as a dad when I am not their dad? Did she like me? Over and over until the sun would set. The only thing that saved the telephone conversation would be the dying battery that needed to be recharged.

ad nauseum“I didn"t come here to talk about your job or Yolanda,” Daniel interrupted.

“Then why are you here?” Jose Luis was upset that he was interrupted but was anxious to know why Daniel traveled the long distance to his motel.

“I wanted to let you know that Maria called me. She spoke to mom and, unfortunately, Michael is dead.” Silence filled the room.

Jose Luis sat down at the edge of the frumpy bed and gazed at the floor. “Why are you telling me?”

“He is our brother. What do you mean "why am I telling you?" Have some sympathy and respect.”

Jose Luis knew that Michael was their youngest brother. Daniel"s revelation was not anything new. Jose Luis simply lacked the compassion for others other than himself.

“What do you want me to do about that? I have no money.” Jose Luis looked around the motel room with his arm outstretched as if to point out the obvious destitution which confirmed this fact.

“I"m not asking you for money.” Daniel knew that even if Jose Luis had some money that he would never offer it even in this time of need. “Mom wants to know if you are going to the funeral.”

“I can"t afford to fly to Atlanta.”

“Mom"s church is having a memorial in Atlanta, but Michael is going to be buried here.”

“I"m not sure if I am going to go.”

“Why not?”

“You know why.”

Jose Luis was probably ashamed to relay the story again. Or perhaps he was tired of saying this nearly half-decade-old story that he held quick to the heart. Daniel thought it was silly and asinine. Years ago, Jose Luis also lived in Atlanta with his mom and youngest brother, Michael. But Jose Luis felt ostracized because he lived in the basement. Michael and their mother lived upstairs in the three bedroom home that she rented. The basement room where Jose Luis lived was spacious and bigger than the master suite. It even had its own entrance and direct access to the backyard. Jose Luis believed that he was relegated to the basement. He resented it because of the flooring was cold and damp. The flooring was really just painted cement with no carpeting or tile. In some ways, Jose Luis thought of himself like a cinderfella or even the black sheep of the family. He viewed the basement room as being hidden away even though guests rarely came to the house. To add insult to injury, Jose Luis felt that the $200 a month rent that he paid to his mother was excessive. Why couldn"t he live there for free even if he was a grown man? Michael didn"t have to pay rent. So why should he? Paying rent, Jose Luis thought, entitled him to do whatever he wanted in the house. He wanted to smokie w**d, which his mother forbade adamantly. Jose Luis also felt that everyone, including Michael, should listen to him and do what he said even though Michael was a teenager at the time.

Jose Luis was not the ideal, oldest brother. He lost jobs all the time, argued over minuscule things, had uncontrollably rage, but most of all was manipulative to no end. Jose Luis often took advantage of Michael. He knew that Michael had not seen his father in years and that Michael desperately wanted a father figure. Although Jose Luis was not Michael"s father, Jose Luis was twenty-four years his senior. Michael wanted to look up to Jose Luis even if it meant taking up that nasty smoking habit at the young age of fourteen. Jose Luis would promise to take Michael to the movies or to dinner. He gave every excuse in the book to avoid taking Michael anywhere because he was cheap. Jose Luis ended up wasting the little money that he had on lavish gifts to his female friends. These women had no interest in him other than getting some of his paltry money. If Michael was older and had a job, Jose Luis would have used those opportunities to swindle Michael out of his money and trick Michael to pay for the movies or a good meal. Without that option, Jose Luis"s only tactic to avoid his promises was simply to make himself scarce and to say, “Next week” when Michael finally caught up to him. After a while, Michael realized what Jose Luis was doing, but still longed to spend time with his oldest brother.

Jose Luis only had time to spend with Michael when he needed an opponent to play against in a video game or if Jose Luis did not want to watch a DVD movie by himself. Of course, none of the activities cost Jose Luis any money. That fact did not escape Michael. But when Jose Luis started working nights and on the weekends, he had even less time to spend with Michael. One Friday night while Jose Luis was working, Michael walked down to the basement, entered Jose Luis"s room, and took several DVDs. That night, Michael watched the movies in his own room on his TV with his own DVD player. He enjoyed the alone time that the house gave to him that evening, sipped soda, and ate buttered popcorn. After the solemnity of that long evening that ended in the early hours the next morning, Michael fell asleep; forgetting to return the DVDs. Weeks later, Jose Luis finally noticed that some of his DVDs were missing. He looked everywhere for them until he finally found them in Michael"s room. Enraged by what he perceived as a betrayal beyond measure, in revenge, Jose Luis urinated in the DVD player; ruining it so that it was no longer usable.

“Take that,” he said to himself gleefully, hoping it would teach Michael a lesson. “How dare he steal from me?”

Daniel heard the story many times. He anticipated that Jose Luis would repeat this story as his excuse why he would not attend the funeral. Daniel exclaimed, “He didn"t steal your DVDs. He just borrowed them. You could still use them. It"s not like he broke them or sold them. I can"t believe that you did that. That was disgusting and immature of you. You"re a grown man and Michael was a kid. You were supposed to be a positive role model for him. I don"t even know why mom even let you stay with her. You didn"t even buy the DVDs anyway. I gave them all to you for free after you begged me for them. So if anyone should be mad, I should be.”

Tired of this scolding over the years, Jose Luis sighed in desperation. “I know. I know. But they were my DVDs and he had no right to take them. He needed to learn a lesson.”

“I can"t believe that you never apologized. Does mom know that you did that?”

“She"s your mother.” Jose Luis never answered, not that day or any other previous day when he first told Daniel and Daniel inquired of him. Daniel was too embarrassed to bring up the subject to his mother. Years later, after Jose Luis moved back to Georgia from California on yet another whim, their mother did tell Daniel that she knew what Jose Luis had done to Michael"s DVD player. But in the interim, Daniel never knew if she was aware of Jose Luis"s shenanigans.

“Fine. Come to the funeral if you want. Don"t come if you don"t want to. Just don"t wear that purple suit that you wore to Maria"s wedding. It"s inappropriate.” Daniel wanted to also let Jose Luis know not to wear the accompanying single, white glove that he also wore to the wedding. But Daniel did not want to press the issue.

“What are you talking about? That"s a great suit,” Jose Luis added.

“Maria doesn"t want you coming in your purple suit.”

“Maria doesn"t control me. She thinks she is my mom and says that she took care of us when we were kids. She didn"t cook for us; she didn"t help us with our homework; she didn"t encourage us to do well in our lives, or in any way act like a mother to us. So I don"t know why she keeps saying she was a mom to us after all these years. I don"t consider her my mother. I"m going to do what I want, not what Maria wants. I moved here to this motel because I don"t want to listen to her anymore. I love my sister, but I love myself more.”

Daniel could not disagree with Jose Luis. So he walked out of the motel room onto the dusty road to his car and drove home.