Misty's Journal
1245 Words
February 1st 2015
Dear Diary
I can't believe that I actually got accepted into university. Stanford University no less, it was such a prestigious school that I honestly thought that I wouldn't make it in, that my grades wouldn't be high enough, but look at me now! I'm so excited. I finally did it and chase my dreams and I'm actually here now. I can't stop pinching myself. I wonder how dad will go without me being with him though. I'm sure he'll manage.
I'm going to study computer science. I'm fantastic with computers and technology. It's something I enjoy so much and can actually learn about without feeling bored. Everything about computers interests me. Is that me being a bit too nerdy? There's just something about them that causes me to be fascinated.
I think dad might miss me a lot especially with mum gone and an empty house and my cousins as well but I can't wait to be independent. I already have a job lined up so that I can pay for my books and fees. I don't want dad paying, not when we are struggling as it is. He's had enough pressure financially, it's my turn to step up and pay my own way. He's done everything for me and I am so incredibly lucky to have such a wonderful father as him. Not everybody get's that opportunity so I'm grateful and incredibly blessed. He's such a great dad. He'd do anything for me if I asked.
I wish I had some friends going with me but everyone I know has been accepted at other universities so it looks like it will be just me. That's ok though because I know that I'll make new friends at my university and sisters as well. Maybe I'll even find someone to love at university and begin to date like all my friends have done. Plus we've all promised to write with one another so it's not like I'll lose touch with them all.
Do you think that I'm smart enough or pretty enough to pledge a sorority? I've always dreamed about joining one and having sisters to rely on. My dad says I am but I'm pretty sure he's biased, or he has to say it just because I'm his daughter. But I like to believe he's not lying and being completely honest with me.
I wonder what a sorority is really like and whether its really like you see in the movies. Probably not. But Maybe it's better. Theres always a positive to go with the negative my dad always says. Just because a coin is tarnished doesn't mean it's not shiny on the other side.
Do you think that they will look down on me because I'm not well off and have a part scholarship? I know that a lot of prestigious families attend Stanford University and I'm scared I'll stand out like a sore thumb. I'm not ashamed of having little money. My dad worked hard to keep a roof over my head, feed me and clothe me. I might not be as rich but I'm rich in all the ways that truly matter. I wonder how many other people can say that and actually mean it? Maybe being rich isn't that good after all behind closed doors.
I also only have basic clothes, it's not like I can really afford new ones and I won't ask dad for money right now. I guess I might have to save some cash from my job as a waitress. I hope that I do ok at this job, its the first one I've really had and I've never waitressed before. How hard could it be though? If I can learn about computers and be really good at that then surely I can pick up waitressing and everything that the role requires. If others can do it then so can I. I just have to believe in myself. I have to make this work. I can't go back to my small town with my tail between my legs because I've failed. Not after trying so hard to make it. Not when I've given up everything to be here. My friends, my home, my life to be exact. I will succeed because I have to.
Dad's been real quiet lately and I've seen him circling job ads in the paper. I know he's still working but I think he's trying to find a better paying one. I really hope he does, he's actually really smart and deserves more money than what he gets now. I've even circled some jobs myself that he hadn't even considered. He really needs to be more confident about his skills and abilities. After all he taught me everything I know about technology and computers. He just needs to gain some more confidence and put himself out there, especially since he won't have to worry about me and taking care of my needs above his own. He would be great for any company to have. Just because he doesn't have a degree doesn't mean he's any less clever than any someone who did have one.
I'm going to pledge Kappa Kappa Gamma, It's the only sorority I've ever considered and I don't want any others. This one is one my mother went to so I'm already a legacy. That means they can't refuse right? I'm pretty sure that's how it works. God I wish my mother was here with me right now. It's not fair that she had to die of cancer. Even though it's been two years I still really miss her, dad too. Life really sucks sometimes. I still remember all the good times we had together and all the stories she told me about her sorority and fellow sister's. The look on her face as she reminisced and the smile on her face when she remembered, it was such a joyous time in her life and that's what I'm hoping for as well. This is the opprotunity of a lifetime and I'm not going to waste it. Not when my very life hinges on graduating and getting a well paid job and position in a prestigious company that would help set her up for life and ensure a better future for myself.
There'll be more opportunities for me to write in you. Memories I've made and the classes I've attended and even how my professors are. I've heard the one that specialises in computer science is quite strict but also very knowledgeable. As long as you do the work then apparentaly there's no problems, but if you don't then he's a hard taskmaster who doesn't get off your back. Lucky that the admissions officer let me know when I inquired. The other ones are apparently really kind and that's all she could offer me. I wonder if that's actually a good thing or a bad thing depending on how you look at it? I suppose I'll find out in my classes on the first day. I guess I've written enough for now. I promise to write in this everyday when I go to get to the university itself so that I can look back and remember all the good times I had and the all of the friends I made. All the new things I'll get to do and experience away from my small town and in a big city.
Goodbye for Now, write soon
Misty Williams
- Writer
