I started feeling way too hot. My breathing hitched. I felt like the walls were closing in. I held my neck and tried to breath slowly but it wasn't helping.
"Lin!" I heard a voice from afar.
I slowly concentrated on trying to get me back to breathing normally. I was going to kill Stacy.. I swear to God. The b***h knew nothing about me yet she was making my life a living hell.. I mean she already did that.. told everyone at school I'm the dumb ass girl that comes from a small school.. and now she was lying about me beating her up. She was about to find out what beating her up for real really is.
I was going to be in deep s**t because of her lie. I was going to get beat up and probably more because of her lie.
I felt a bit scared. I knew he was going to be mad and I'd pay for it and I knew she wouldn't do anything about it.
"Lin... Olwethu..." Ms Louw's voice said snapping me out of my thoughts. I opened my eyes and looked at the beautiful figure in front of me.
"Are you okay? What's wrong?"
I tried to stand up, "It's nothing. He's coming anyways."
"Who?"
"Where's the principal's office..?"
"Who's coming already Lin and what will he do?"
I shrugged, "it doesn't matter Ms Louw. Where's the office..?"
"Next to the administration office... Will you be okay?" she asked the last question looking really worried and I smiled, "I didn't do it. She's lying..." and I left her there.
My heart hammered so hard against my chest I thought it was suddenly going to jump out. I tried so hard not to worry and told myself that he'll hold himself in front of the people, but he was going to leave with me. The thought of that alone managed to wrestle me up.
I heard voices already when I approached and I knew my dad was already in there.
"What took you so long? I asked Ms Louw to send you in the moment you arrived in her class?" The principal said and I went to sit on the only empty seat that was next to my dad. He looked furious but he always knew how to control himself in front of people.
"I'm sorry principal I didn't know your office."
The principal sighed, "You're here it's fine. So I'm told you beat Miss Lewis.. mind telling us what happened?"
"I didn't beat her.. I never even touched her before." I said and the principal shook his head, "Stacy tell us what happened.."
I looked at stacy and she looked at me before turning to the principal, the b***h still had that fake make up bruise on her face.
"Well it started outside school to be exact. We share a transport and she'd make remarks about me there..."
I gasped so loud and cut her off, "Stacy don't lie.. Don't lie please.. You don't know who I am.. I was so surprised when you said you'll make my life a living hell because I didn't even know who you are. In the transport you rather sit with your bag next to you than to give me a place to sit... I agree today I lost it because I'd have been forced to stand on my feet while you sat on two seats one.. so I took the bag and put it on the floor... big mistake because that made you threaten me.." my hands were now shaking. I was scared.
"Miss Lin... you do realize we have a footage that shows you actually threatening to 'f### up her face'... your words not mine.." the principal cut me off and I nodded, "I did say that I remember because I was there... did she tell what she said before I said that?"
"I didn't do or say anything to go.. this started in the transport... she hates me."
I sighed, "Stacy I didn't even know who you were until Ms Louw told me. Why would I do you wrong."
"I don't know you too."
I looked at the girl, trying to maybe get through her because I knew I was in deep s**t because of her lie, "Stacy please tell the truth... please I'm begging you... just please tell the truth."
I sounded so vulnerable and didn't care...I rather beg her than to deal with what was coming.
"Principal, I'd like to take this time and apologize for my daughter's behavior. I promise you this will never happen.. and I mean NEVER." My dad spoke.
God! I knew that voice pretty well, I closed my eyes, "I didn't do anything I swear on my father's grave.... Stacy tell the truth please.. stop with the games.."
The girl looked away... I felt like crying right there and begging someone to not allow me to go home. I didn't want to go home.
"Well Olwethu you will be suspend.. for two days, so we will see you on Thursday..."
My heart sank while listening to the principal. But then it was good since I'd use these days to nurse myself until Saturday's try outs.
"Thank you principal." My father said getting up and taking my bag, "let's go..."
I got up and looked at Stacy one more time.. I felt like telling her to go f**k off or to go die... but I kept my cool and followed my father who was already looking at me as if I was his prey.. I felt sick to my stomach. I wanted to run and never show mmy face again but I know consequences of doing that. So I couldn't.
We slowly made it to his car that was parked next to the gate. I went to the passenger side to open the door but the I felt something push me hard until I hit the car..
"Not here please.." I mumbled and he whispered in my ear, "You're going to regret this... I thought moving will change things. I thought you'd finally be grateful for what you have and the school you attend.. but you are one troubled child... Olwethu you are going to regret laying your hands on Stacy.."
He let go of me and instructed that I go in. I did as quickly as I could. Then ge started driving.
"Don't I give you everything?" He asked and I nodded, "you do.."
"Best school, best life.. you have everything.. everything Olwethu.. yet you do this.. what do you want? Attention?"
I mentally rolled my eyes and thought, it's not me who wants attention, It's Stacy.
"I'm not looking for attention. I didn't do it. Stacy is lying." I said and gasped when I felt something collide with my face, right on my nose to be exact.
"Do not lie to me young lady..." he yelled and I kept quiet and shut my eyes. I smelt blood and I knew my nose was going to bleed. I quickly took off my school jersey and put it on my nose...
We drive in silence and went straight home.. it was a bit early to be home.. around 3 and my mom and sister don't get home until about 4.. I was scared for my life because it was just going to be me and him.
We got out of the house the moment he parked in the garage and he took my hand pulling me inside the house..
"Dad I didn't do it. I didn't touch her I swear.. please don't do this.. please..." I said for the last time in attempt to stop what already began at the school parking lot.
He took me straight to his room and locked me in there alone.
I looked around for anything I could use against him when he comes back. All I could see were pictures of our 'perfect family' and they closet.. I quickly went on my knees and looked under the bed to only be welcomed by shoes.. I went to their bathroom and found his set of golf clubs..
"I wouldn't do that if I were you... because if you kill me, you are as good as dead, and so is your mother." His voice said in his bedroom.. "just come out.."
I sighed and turned around leaving the bathroom.. when I laid my eyes on him it was like we were back in Eastern Cape. The look on his face.
He threw in one punch.. I lifted my head to my face but it was too late... I stumbled backwards.. I watched in horror as he unbuttoned his belt.
"Sipho please... I didn't do anyth...."
He hit me... I sat down and covered my face with my heads as I listened to him talk about how ungrateful I was and then beating me up. He'd kick me now and then but I was used to this.
Tears weren't even there anymore. Pain was there still the same but it didn't make me cry anymore.
He finally stopped...
I slowly lifted my head up and saw him. He slowly dropped his belt on the floor and gave me lne familiar look.
The look of horror in my eyes.. I couldn't... he couldn't... No!
"Maybe..." he said, "Maybe you don't listen because I'm too soft..."
I got up and limped heavily towards the door. I wasn't going to let him touch me again... that was a No.. I wasn't that little girl anymore.
I felt his hand on my waist as he pushed me against the door. Then he connected our bodies. I could disgustingly feel his crotch on my back.
"You know it's been a while..." he whispered on my neck and I could smell the hint of alcohol on his breath.. so he went to drink first? I pushed him backwards, quickly opened the door and limped upstairs to my bedroom.
I locked the door and pushed my bed to the door too.
My body was in so much pain. I slowly took off my bloody school shirt and made it to my bathroom... I had a blue eye... I swallowed and slowly took off my clothes.. I had a few scratched bruises from the belt since he was using the other side of it. I ran me a bath and got in. I bit on my lower lip at how painful it was... I prayed I be fully recovered for my try outs on Saturday.
After an hour of cleaning my bruises up and bandaging those that needed it, I drank myself to sleep. The pain was just too much and the tears were just leaving my eyes...
..
Tuesday came and I opened my school email so I can submit my English assignments but was surprised to see two emails from her.
Dear Miss Lin...
I hope you're okay. You were not okay when you left my class.
She was funny.. so now she cares if I'm okay or not.. yet she didn't believe me when I told her I didn't do it.
I read her second email which was sent right after 8pm.
Dear Olwethu
You haven't responded to my first email. Lin just tell me you're okay.
I rolled my eyes as I attached my assignments and sent her an email.
Dear Ms Louw..
Please find the attached assignments.
I then tried to get up. It was now around 10am. My mom tried knocking earlier asking if I was okay. I ignored her and pretended to be sleeping. Talking to her was just a waste of time. It was like I didn't talk at all. So why bother.
I went to check on my bruises. They weren't as bad as I thought they'd be. I applied another Arnica cream and bandaged them then fixed my bed and pushed it back to it's original place.
I went downstairs to make food, I was starving since I last ate during lunch at school.
While I was eating the home phone rang.. I debated whether or not to answer it. I mean people knew no one was home at 11 so why the f**k were they calling.
It rang again and I sighed answering the landline, "Lin resistance..."
'thank goodness... Olwethu are you okay?'
Really? She was fucken doing this?
"I'm fine Ms Louw. I hope you got your assignments. I emailed them an hour ago."
'I did thank you for remembering to submit them today. How are you? You seemed worked out yesterday.'
I shrugged as if she could see me, "Don't worry yourself about me. I got my punishment for something I didn't do.. and you got your assignments.. so if that's all, I'd like to get back to eating my breakfast."
She sighed, 'Lin wait... I'm sorry... are you okay?'
I felt a knot on my throat. I wanted to cry because no one hardly asks if I'm okay. I opened my mouth to speak but I couldn't. Tears started to waltz down my cheeks. I quickly slammed the phone down hanging up.
I wiped my tears and told myself that only a year is left and I'll be out of here.. legal enough to do s**t on my own without a guardian's permission. I needed to stay alive for the coming 10 months. Then I'll be out.
The day went by painfully slow or maybe it was because of the pain my body was in. But it went slow, I cleaned and cooked and around four I went back up to my room again.
I locked my door and worked on the homework I got from my email.
My mom arrived.
'can you open the door please..'
'I just need to see you..' she said from the other side of the door. I sighed and got up. I still had that blue eye but if she insisted on seeing me then I'd let her see me.
'are you oka..' I opened the door and she furrowed her brows at me, "your father told me you got into a fight..I didn't know it was this bad.." she said the last part trying to touch my eye and I leaned backwards away from her.
"Honey what's wrong?"
"I didn't get into any fight.." I said packing my laptop and putting back to my closet. I was done with my homework.
"Your eye...?"
I turned to my mother, "I got disciplined... as YOU call it."
She frowned, "Honey..."
"Please go mom. I want to sleep now, I'm done with school work and staff.."
"Come join us for supper.."
"I ate.. goodnight..."
Later I drank myself to sleep again since pains were still there...and dreams were threatening again.
Wednesday was okay. I talked to Susan on the phone since she called me to check how I was doing. After telling her I'll see her tomorrow she was all smiley and telling me it was boring without me drooling over our teacher.
I tried exercising later on outside so that I'll be ready for Sat.. my ankle was painful as f**k since I was limpering because of it, but I tried to work with it.. I took it easy on it.
Later I called the transport driver and asked him to fetch me first. He complained and told me he'd have to wake up earlier and I too.. but I didn't care, I asked him to come.
Around 5am I was done, I looked at myself one last time, making sure the make-up covered the fading blue eye.. yep it was working.. The transport arrived and I limped downstairs.. heard my mom talk to my dad in their bedroom but I made my way out.
I got inside the car on the front seat..
"Hey... thanks and I'm sorry for all this trouble.." I said.
"Are you okay?"
I nodded "yeah.. why?"
"Because today it's trousers and golf t-shirts but you're wearing your normal shirt.."
I shrugged and said the first lie on my mind, "I'm good.. a bit cold so I avoided something with short sleeves.."
"Okay.."
I sighed internally and thanked God that this guy didn't ask any further questions. We fetched others and headedto school.
I limped out of the car and slowly made it to my first class, which was english today. I made sure I stay far from Stacy.
I sat on my chair, took my book out and got ready for class.
Susan walked in and she shook her head the moment she saw me, "long sleeve shirt? Really? Dude it's Thursday..."
"I think I'm coming down with flue.." I spread my lie, "so I need to be warm."
The girl laughed poking me, "You're crazy.. you get two days of vacation and catch flue while other people gain weight because of happiness."
I wished it was like two days of vacation... but it was a nightmare to me. I told Susan everything.. well not everything that happened at home.. but everything about Stacy and to my surprise she believed me. At least one person believed me in this world...
"She'll go to hell.. even if it means me driving there..." Susan said making me laugh.
"Shut up.. Louw is coming..."
"She's been feeling down a bit. I don't know what's up." Susan said and I shrugged.
Stacy walked in and looked at me. She watched me from the door until she went past me. I couldn't read her facial expression. So I had no idea if she was telling me never to f**k with her again or what. But I had already told myself that I'll never say a word to her.
"Morning class..." Ms Louw said the moment she walked in. She looked around and her eyes met with mine. She smiled a bit and then said, "from the first raw turn and the perso you see is your partner.. I want this quiz by the end of class.."
I watched them in front of me praying so hard that the girl in front of me would turn to me. I ran outta luck when I realized that I needed to turn around...
I sat like that and didn't move even an inch. I wasn't about to work with the devil.
I felt something grab my shoulder. I inhaled so hard trying not to scream because that hurt like hell.. I shut my eyes and bit my bottom lip.
"Lin you have to turn around, we have to work..." this lying b***h said in whisper.
"Let go of her..." Susan said a bit louder looking at Stacy.
"Is there any problem? Susan?" Louw's voice asked and I lifted my head to see the teacher walking towards us. She was wearing all black today and still looked blazing. But I tried to concentrate on the fact that she didn't believe me on Monday therefore I was mad at her.
"Ms Louw Olwethu doesn't want to work with me..." Stacy said in that annoying innocent voice of hers.
"Miss Lin? Follow me..."
Fuck!
I sighed but got up and limped behind my teacher to her desk.
"Don't make things difficult for you Olwethu!" Louw said and I looked at her, "I won't work with her....I won't do anything with her and I won't even talk to her because me talking to her leaves bruises on her face since she's so fragile.. "
"Olwethu...."
I shook my head, "noooo ma'am. Either you assign me with someone else, let me to this alone or you punish me.. as for Stacy I want nothing to do with her."
She sighed, "work alone.."
I was surprised she gave in but I limped back to my seat and started working alone. Stacy tried to get my attention but I ignored her point blank..
The class ended and I limped out. Louw tried to call for me but I ignored her. I wasn't ready to be asked questions about my dress code nor my limpering.
After school I slowly walked down the hallway to my transport.
"Dude.. were you planning on leaving before saying bye to your new bestie..?" Susan asked running to me. I laughed, "I'm sorry.. just a lot on my mind.."
"Why are you limping?"
I lied, "I.. umh.. been working out getting ready for soccer tryouts on Saturday.."
"Tryouts are done.."
"I got me a slot.. well Ms Louw got me a slot.. so I injured my ankle.."
"How will that go if you're injured?"
I shrugged, "I'll do well..."
She pulled me into a hug, "all the best.." and then she ran off.
I was about to get out of the main door when I felt something pull me roughly.. I pulled away from their hold and turned to my English teacher.
"Lin.. I sent you emails asking how you were and you avoided that only to pitch at schoop limping... what's wrong? What happened."
"I'm fine... nothing happened. I was practicing for tryouts.. I'm fine.."
She stood there a while and then sighed, "I'm worried about you."
I laughed, seriously laughed, "could have fooled me. For a second I almost believed you.. but then I remembered why the f**k would you be worried about me if you don't even believe that I didn't do s**t to Stacy..."
"Evidence...."
"f**k evidence... she's lying..."
We watched as two students went past us and left the school. She sighed, "could you come to my office and tell me what happened.. and how it happened... please, I should have done that in the first place..."
I shook my head, "nah it's cool I beat Stacy with my words and gave her bruises... I'll see you tomorrow Ms Louw."
I turned to leave but she pulled me by my arm and I winced in pain, "ouch..."
Without any warning she rolled up my shirt revealing some of my bruises and then looked at me shocked, "Olwethu what happened to you!!"
I roughly pulled my hand from her, "nothing..." and turned around leaving her there.
I slowly approached my transport and realized that the car was already full and only one space was available.. had a bag seating there.. I shook my head and went past the car, if it meant walking to get a taxi to be away from Stacy.. then I'd do just that..
"Lin came share a seat with us..." the boys I was sitting next to last week said and I shook my head, "I'll walk..."
I put on my earphones and started playing Hurt by Christina Aguilera..
I could literally relate to the song.. I wished my dad was still alive because I missed my him more than anything. We were poor with him but it didn't cost me my happiness like richness is doing now.
I quickly jumped when a car climbed into the pavement right in front of me..
I took my headsets off and looked at the teacher in the car, "are you trying to fucken kill me?"
She lifted both her hands, "I'm sorry I wasn't. I have been talking to you non stop.."
"I don't want to talk to you..." I shot at her.
"Get in the car."
I ached my brow at her, "I'm not crazy..."
"I never said you are. Get it, It's not safe to be walking here.."
I looked around me and saw a few people walking. Then I thought about her asking me questions I didn't want to answer. I was better walking right...?
"Lin get in the car... I promise I won't ask any questions regarding your hand.. I'll just take you home.. it's not safe here... please get in the car.."
I sighed and got inside. She smiled after I closed the door and started to drive away..
After a while she sighed, "look I know we don't know each other and we started off badly... but I just want you to know that I'm here if you want to talk about anything... my office is open all the time.. except for sundays.. but you can email me.."
I shrugged, "cool.."
She drove again in silence..
"You almost killed me..." I said and she looked at me. I was serious.
"God you love exaggerating don't you?"
I looked at her and found her smiling. I smiled too shaking my head, it was just so hard to stay mad at her.
"No.. you almost killed me."
She rolled her eyes sexily, "fine... maybe next time I'll actually hit you for real.. and then hear what you'll say.."
My smile grew wider, "so there'll be a next time?"
She shrugged, "I mean I enjoy listening to you telling me that I almost killed you... so next time might happen."
I nodded my head and looked outside the window as she drove me home....