Chapter 7
1156 Words
Chapter 7
I wandered through the streets on my way home, trying to clear my head.
It was still strange to me that there were streets and apartments and shops on a space station. The park with trees, birds, and a fountain seemed out of place, but I loved the park. They were trying to reduce the stress of living in a tin can by emulating home and bringing some nature to the place. It worked, especially the park.
I needed to think. Malvolio would probably call me after work, as usual, and I could tell him I didn’t want to see him anymore. The thought of it made my stomach twist itself into more knots, but I had to do it.
Wait. No. I couldn’t tell him on the Vid. I should at least have the decency to tell him to his face. The thought made me cringe inside. But only cowards broke up with someone over the Vid or a text-only message. I took a deep breath and resolved to just do it.
Suddenly, my front door was in view. My heart sank. I didn’t want to go home, but I plodded over to the entrance.
I stood in front of the Door-cam and the security system’s retina scanner signalled its recognition with a flickering green light. My door swished open. Immediately upon entry to my small apartment, the lights faded on. Everything still swirled around in my mind as the Home Computer greeted me in a dull female voice.
“Good evening, Lennina. You have two new messages.”
Of course I did.
I ignored the messages and the sinking feeling they caused and headed straight for the bathroom. The shower was my thinking place. I’d changed my mind. I did want to be home.
If the messages were anything like what Malvolio had said at lunch, I didn’t want to play them back. Everything he said kept playing on a loop in my head.
I had to somehow tell him I didn’t want to see him anymore and get him to leave as soon as possible afterward. Yeah. Simple.
I might have felt numb earlier, but it hit me now.
I’d known Malvolio for about seven weeks and been dating him for about four. It had been a whirlwind kind of romance. He was always giving compliments that made me blush, bought me gifts and flowers, and was so sweet. He told me how he felt about me before I could even decide if I liked him enough to say yes to a first date. He was charming and witty and didn’t give up. I’d finally said yes and things had been so wonderful.
Tears slid down my cheeks. What had gone wrong? Things were so good before all of this happened. He seemed like such a great guy. He’d changed. I didn’t understand. I wanted the old Malvolio back.
The things that had happened at work popped back into my mind. It was hard to think.
I closed my eyes and breathed deeply as I concentrated on relaxing my body.
It wasn’t enough. I needed a hot shower.
When I stood in front of the bathroom mirror, I noticed that a long piece of my dark hair had fallen out of the untidy bun I’d put it in that morning. I was looking pretty wild and unkempt. I pulled my hair from the bun and turned to watch it fall down my back. I’d always had long hair and it was long enough now to reach the middle of my back.
Malvolio always told me it looked untidy and dishevelled. He thought it would really suit me to have a short pixie cut that left some of my hair curled around onto my cheeks. I would never wear it like that — but didn’t tell him that. Sure, my hair had a mind of its own sometimes, but that wasn’t a reason to cut it all off. He didn’t understand. There were a lot of things about me he didn’t understand.
I tossed my clothes into the laundry chute and stepped into the shower cubicle, the glass door sliding shut behind me.
The shower unit was linked to the Home Computer and at my command, jets of hot water sprayed me from all angles except my face.
I closed my eyes to try to relax. It didn’t work. I tried rubbing my face and temples. It helped, a little.
Am I doing the right thing? Shouldn’t we be trying to sort things out? Am I giving up over something trivial? I didn’t want to give up. Too many people gave up when it got too hard. Like my father.
I squeezed my eyes shut. This wasn’t something trivial. He’d accused me of cheating on him. This was too big to ignore. I couldn’t wrap my head around how he’d come to the conclusion that I was sleeping with my best friend.
How could I make him see how wrong he was and how impossible it was for me to be seeing Javolo? Malvolio needed to know that I would not betray his trust and cheat on him. Because that’s the last thing I’d do. I may not have wanted a relationship to begin with, but I would never cheat on someone. I knew what it was like to have someone cheat on you and it was deeply painful. I would never want to make someone feel like that.
I had to ask myself, Do I want to fix this?
My head ached from the stress.
Sighing, I placed my hands on the tiled wall in front of me and tried to picture a tranquil scene. Trees and flowers moving in the breeze. I slowed my breathing. Refocused on the scene. It was where I used to go when I was a kid. A place near my home where I’d always found peace. There were trees and flowers in a large clearing in the bush, with a creek running through the middle of it all.
I still needed something more.
I turned around and leaned my back against the wall, the jets of water tickling my skin. I slowly let myself slide down until I was sitting on the floor of the cubicle, thankful that the water had warmed up the wall and the floor. I pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them.
“Fill,” I ordered, and the whole cubicle began flooding with water.
I waited with my eyes closed, wishing I could relax completely and shake the anxiety and frustration that were eating at me.
When the water level reached my neck, I told it to stop filling and sat with my eyes still closed until I could clear my mind and unwind. I couldn’t relax completely, but it was close.
When I finally emerged from the bathroom, the Home Computer reminded me that there were two messages on the Vid for me.
“Hello, Lennina, darling.”
I jumped back and made a weird squeaking noise at the sight of Malvolio standing in my kitchen. “Oh, my stars! You scared the life out of me!”
- Writer
