I did not know what to do with myself. The thought of committing myself in a mental institution getting more and more of an option. I would stare at my balcony with sore eyes, just sitting by the glass door not moving yet I knew that one of those good days I would open it and be tempted to do the worst of sins. I sat with my knees to my chest. My arms wrapped around my legs with my head on them. If one asked I would not tell them what I was thinking. I would sit there all day long and walk to bed when the next morning came. The sense of living was lost on me, the television playing on its own nothing else to be heard. The room was cold, my pull over draped over my frail body. I sat with my eyes dull and colourless. Yet as I sat that day a loud sound filled the room, a sound I could not rec
