Call of the Goddess

A Silver Wolf

I hear my mom call after me as I run, but I don’t look back. Once I’m out in the cool evening air, I head for the woods on the edge of the packhouse’s property. There, under the cover of trees, I remove my clothing, and slip them into the drawstring bag I keep in my back pocket. The fabric is thin enough for it to fold up small, despite the bag being large enough to hold my entire outfit. It’s a bit cold out, especially when a breeze grazes my bare skin, but I don’t care. I’m practically numb to the cold, with my mind unable to focus on anything other than the events that just unfolded back in the packhouse. Besides, my skin won’t be bare for long.

Gaining the ability to change into your wolf form is a right of passage that every wolf experiences for the first time at the age of 16. Under the first full moon that rises after you’ve begun your 17th year of life, you gather outside with the closest full-grown wolves in your life, typically your parents. They act as your guides, teaching you how to use the power of the moon goddess to connect to your soul, and awaken the sleeping part of yourself. Eventually, your body begins to shift for the first time. You grow bigger, and your body proportions begin to change. Long, thick fur grows from previously-bare skin, while the hair on your head changes length to match. You grow a long, fluffy tail, and your teeth and nails sharpen. It feels as if you are finally whole, and you wonder how you ever could have ignored the fact that such a huge part of you was missing. And from that day forward, under the light of the moon, you can change into your wolf form at will.

I slip my bag’s drawstring around my neck. The strap is comically large now, but it won’t be in a few seconds. I’ve had my wolf form for well over a year now, almost 2. Nothing feels better than shifting and running through the woods, just myself, surrounded by nature. I’ve never felt so close to the creatures that live on the pack territory as I have when in my wolf form. I know that many of my peers prefer to shift in groups, enjoying the special mental link that forms between shifted wolves of the same pack and the unparalleled sense of comradery they experience as a result. I’ve never had the courage to be that vulnerable with another wolf. Shifting has always been a very personal experience for me.

After taking a deep breath, I allow my wolf form to take over. Where my pale, skinny human frame once stood, there is now a large wolf with thick, black fur and glowing yellow eyes. My senses of hearing and smell are now heightened, and it’s now that I notice how quiet the woods are. Did the witches scare away the woodland creatures? Is that what happened to my bird friends? The gravity of the pack’s situation is setting in more and more, especially now that I’ve been personally tasked with setting things right. I shake my wolf’s body as if I’m trying to shake off water, somehow hoping that will fling the terrifying thoughts from my head. Then I take off through the woods, trying to run away from my worries before they can catch back up with me.

Running through the woods is an almost indescribable feeling. The dirt under your paws, the crunch of the leaves, the way your wolf’s ability to instinctively dodge the trees in your path makes you feel like an action hero. If anything can get your mind off of a long, stressful day, this is it. I allow my human brain to gradually slip away, going almost full wolf. I chase after any scent in my path to see where it leads, just for the thrill of the hunt. I howl into the night sky, just because it feels freeing. Eventually, though, the hunger and the thirst start to set in. I make my way over to a small creek that I have drunk from on many wolfish outings. When I get there and find my old, reliable drinking spot full of sand, I collapse as the weight of my pack’s situation returns all at once, nearly crushing me. I whimper.

It’s all gone. The creek’s dried up.

My already large eyes grow even wider. The voice had appeared inside my head. Instinctively, I shift back into my human form. I’m instantly embarrassed by my nakedness, and I sit on the cold, hard forest floor with my knees pulled up to my chest. An absolutely massive wolf with brown and gray fur steps out of the trees and into view. It finally occurs to me that I’ve forgotten about Dalton. Evidently we had similar ideas for how to spend our evenings. Our eyes are locked on each other, my cheeks are turning red and I don’t dare move. I want to ask him to turn away, so I can put some clothes on, but my tongue is tied. And anyway, I’m not sure if it would be considered disrespectful to try and order around a future Alpha. Even though the goddess of war has dictated that I should do exactly that.

After what seems like an eternity, Dalton retreats back into the woods. A second later, I hear his human voice call out to me. “You can put your clothes back on now, Sutton, I won’t look. Just tell me when you’re done.” So I guess he’s back to calling me ‘Sutton.’ I’m not sure where I stand with Dalton Evers, but all these name changes are giving me whiplash.

Grateful for the opportunity, I quickly take my clothes out of my bag and put them on. “I’m done… Sir,” I say once my bag is safely tucked back into my pocket. Dalton comes back into view, in human form this time. He’s wearing pants, which I’m very grateful for, but his chest is bare and the moonlight is reflecting off of every curve of his many muscles. I make an effort not to stare, but this proves to be a difficult task.

“No need to call me, ‘Sir,’” he says as he takes a seat on the opposite bank of the now-sandy creek, facing me. 

“Sorry. Dalton.” I don’t know what else to say. An awkward silence forms between us.

“Some pack meeting, huh?” Dalton says finally. I nod.

“I- I don’t know what happened,” I say, my voice quiet. “I never asked for this.”

Dalton sighs. “I know, I’m sorry if what I said back there was harsh. I know you must be scared.”

Scared is a bit of an understatement. Still, it’s good to hear someone validate my feelings. Most people would probably say that I should feel honored to be called by the goddess, and excited for the opportunity to be a hero to my people. All I feel is nauseous. “You were right, though. I’m not cut out for this. I know it, everyone knows it. There has to have been a mistake.”

“Right? There must have.” Dalton agrees immediately. I would be offended if I had any reason to believe that there was any possible way that I was cut out to lead the pack’s future Alpha on an expedition to save us all from a terrible curse. “No offense,” he adds quickly.

“None taken, I’m on your side.”

“I’m the son of a Beta, the future Alpha, I was born to lead, while Omegas-”

“Are born to stay safely at home and provide moral support.”

“Exactly! Don’t get me wrong, Omegas are totally the backbone of the pack in their own way. It’s just-”

“We weren’t made to lead or be at the forefront of the pack’s battles.”

“Right! I’m kind of relieved that at least one person is talking sense. Can you believe that my dad is actually considering this crazy arrangement?”

“I still can’t believe the goddess ever suggested it in the first place.”

Dalton frowns slightly as if he’s thinking hard about something, his dark eyes narrowed in concentration. I take the opportunity to study his face, something I’d never had the courage to do before tonight. He has high cheekbones and a strong, sharp jawline. His light pink lips, pressed together as he ponders, look plump and full. His hair, as many of my classmates have pointed out, is a gorgeous chestnut brown and is kept a bit long, giving it a wild, fluffy appearance. I’ll bet it’s soft, it looks soft.

“Aluna must have been wrong, there’s no way around it,” Dalton says finally, snapping me out of my self-guided tour of his features. “But, as my father has pointed out, the goddesses work in mysterious ways. It occurs to me that, if it weren’t for tonight’s events, we would likely not be having this conversation next to this sand pit. Therefore, it stands to reason that the great goddess Aluna wanted me to speak with you before heading out to break this curse and save the pack.”

For the first time since the pack meeting, I feel the muscles in my body relax. Could Dalton be right? Could my role in all of this simply be to hold an important conversation with the real hero before his departure? Was this all the goddess’ way of getting the 2 of us together for this moment? I feel a weight lift off my shoulders, realizing that what Dalton was saying clearly made more sense than any other explanation. “Do you really think so?” I ask hopefully.

“I do. Feel free to bestow any of that Omega-brand support or wisdom of yours that you feel the goddess wants me to hear.”

“Um…,” I mutter, not knowing what to say to that. Truth be told, I don’t think I feel the goddess leading me to say anything in particular. “Why don’t I lead us in prayer to the goddess?” I suggest. “And ask that she provide her wisdom so that I may advise you in Her name.”

“An excellent suggestion,” Dalton agrees.

We both bow our heads in the direction of the moon. I close my eyes and try my best to shut off my perception of my surroundings, leaving myself open to feel the goddess Aluna’s presence. “Aluna, Great Goddess of War, we call on you for your wisdom,” I begin. I’m a bit self-conscious to be praying in front of someone I don’t know well, especially when that person is Dalton Evers, but if this is to be my only contribution to the quest to save my pack, I owe it to everyone to push myself out of my comfort zone. “You have called on Dalton to save us from this awful curse that the evil witches have brought onto our pack. You have also called on myself to lead, which I now see must not mean to lead up the mountain, but to lead in prayer as he bravely prepares to do this task. We ask that you-”

I’m interrupted by a bright, white light that blares through the trees. It’s so bright that even with my eyes closed, I have to turn away and shield my face with my arm. I hear Dalton call out in surprise where he sits, not too far away. After a few seconds, the light fades to a much more manageable glow, and I cautiously open my eyes. I almost don’t believe what I’m seeing. Standing a few feet away from me, at the edge of the trees, is a large, glowing silver wolf. Dalton and I are both staring at it in awe. It slowly moves closer, its movements more graceful than any wolf I’ve ever seen, and its feet leave no pawprints on the ground. 

You dare to judge my meaning.

This voice is inside my head, but it isn’t Dalton this time. Its sound is feminine and smoother than silk, almost inhuman, and carries a subtle echo that seems to bounce off the walls of my skull. My mind is racing with a million questions. Who is this mysterious wolf? Where did she come from? What does she want? How is she mind linking with me if I’m not in my wolf form? I stare at her, having no idea what to say or do. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Dalton bow to her, and that’s when it hit me. I’ve heard the legends of wolves being visited by the goddesses in physical form, but I never thought it would happen to me. The goddesses haven’t visited anyone like this in living memory. Until this very moment, I wasn’t even sure if those old stories were real. But now I’m absolutely certain that I’m staring at the goddess Aluna in the flesh.

I quickly follow Dalton’s lead and bow, showing my respect to the goddess. I don’t try to answer her initial statement, I just wait to hear what it is she has to tell me.

Your Beta asked for my wisdom in front of your pack. Do you challenge that wisdom?

Aluna glanced in Dalton’s direction with that last sentence. Dalton shook his head. “No, Goddess,” he says, his voice shaking a little. I’ve never known Dalton to say anything without complete confidence.

The goddess’ gaze then turned to me and I shiver. “No, Goddess,” I agree quickly.

My wisdom is mine, and it is not the place of mortal wolves to question it. I said what I said, and I meant what I meant. You will both climb the mountain, and convince the Great Witch to lift the curse, or your pack will perish. This is my decision.

“Yes, Goddess,” Dalton says.

“Yes, Goddess,” I echo.

I know you are afraid. I know your are confused. Fear not, for I will be with you with every step, and all will become clear in time. Trust in me.

And with that, Aluna, the great goddess of war, vanished in a puff of silvery smoke, and the forest grew dark again with only the light of the moon shining through the high branches of the trees.