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SARAH I got hold of the Jade. Staring at it like it has the answer to my questions or the solution to my problems. Oh! It has, that was why I had it in the first place, to use it when I needed help. Jackson’s voice kept repeating and I was convinced that the only way to help myself was to do as instructed. “If you ever need help and have none. Place it in your heart and I will be there.” I got it closer, and closer, and closer, and closer, only an inch away from my heart. Then I stopped. What was I doing? Does this even work? Even if it does, how will I call the source of my problem to comfort me? Jackson is the reason I feel this way. His rejection is what is making me sober like this. So why should I run to him for comfort? He said clearly in his letter that he wanted me to stay