Deceive not my love-The prince and his maid II

A kiss goodbye

5 days later

*Mirabella*

I am walking back to my room after having being forced to attend dinner by my mother.. I am not in the mood, haven’t been since.. let’s just say that I don’t want to watch Will with her.. his wife.

But to my surprise Will had not been there and his mother said he was feeling a bit under the weather. But Perla was there, she wasn’t saying much and not eating much either.. actually she looks a bit upset and now I am wondering if her and Will had a fight or something.

On the other hand, what do I care about them ? What do I care about that bastard at all.. that cheating, lying.. so sweet and loving bastard.

I huff and half growl at myself, seriously I need to stop giving him any kind of power in my life.. he has chosen.. and I was not his choice.

Opening the door to my room I turn to my maid. “I wish to be alone for a bit.. in half an hour I would like a warm bad”.

“Yes my lady” she curtsies and hurries off, probably happy to have some time to herself too.

I walk into my room and drop down on my bed with a sigh, staring up at the dark purple fabric suspended between the bed posts.

“Bella”. A faint whisper from the dark corner.. a well known memory, there is a little door there to the back hallways used by the servants. Will used to sneak in through that door when we were younger and used to get in trouble.

I sit up and look at the corner, unsure if it was something I imagined. “Will ?”

“Bella”. This time louder, as he steps out of the shadows and I am once more hit by how much like his father he has come to look.. and how grown up he seems.

Crossing my arms on my chest I huff. “Get out of here William, I do not wish to talk to you”.

“Bella please”. His voice begging as he steps closer. “I feel horrible.. please..”.

“You deserve to feel horrible.. you deserve to suffer”. I try to keep my voice steady. “I don’t.. but I still do”.

He breathes in slowly. “You are right, you do not deserve any of that.. and yeah I do deserve it.. but at least let me explain..”.

“Not much to explain is there ?” I hate that my voice sounds whiny. “It was fun to ..play around with me, but you wanted someone .. more experienced, someone more exotic.. I got it”.

“It was nothing like that”. He slumps down on the edge of my bed and I spring to my feet. “I never wanted this”.

I cross my arms again, kinda trying to shield myself. “Well you married her, so you must have wanted that”.

“No I didn’t.. I didn't want that.. “. He straightens his back. “I had to.. had to take responsibility..”.

“You.. you bedded her and..she is expecting your child”. I shake my head. “I am not sure if you think this makes it better Will.. it doesn’t.. you.. you disgust me”.

His head falls down towards his chest, and his shoulders slumps. “I deserve that.. there is no real excuse.. I could say that I am young, driven by hormones.. that she seduced me.. but I should have stopped myself.. only I am to blame”.

“Yes you are”. I mumble.

“I am sorry Bella.. I did not lie to you in my letters.. I meant every word. I made a big mistake, and now I will pay for that for the rest of my life”. He looks up, his eyes sparkling with unshed tears. “You are the one I love..”.

I shake my head. “No Will.. do not dare say that.. do not..”.

“But I do Bella.. I love you”. He whispers. “I have known for as long as I remember that you are my one true love.. my soulmate”.

“Please stop.. it doesn’t matter now.. you are married to someone else.. someone having your baby”. The pain inside me is like a rose of fiery hot iron unfolding, burning me up.

He scrambles to his knees, grabbing my hand. “I don’t love her.. I can’t stand this, seeing contempt in your eyes.. Did you mean your letters ?”

“Of course I meant it.. I would never lie about such things”. I bite my lip so hard I am scared I will break the skin, only letting go to say. “But it doesn’t matter now”.

He desperately kisses my hand several times. “It matters, it means everything.. we.. maybe.. there has to be a way”.

“There is no way Will.. no matter how much I love you”. I try to pull my hands from his grasp, but with no real effort.

“You love me”. It comes out as a choked sound and he presses my hands to his face. “You love me”.

This time I pull my hands away. “I do, but it doesn’t matter Will, you are married and I am not gonna be no man's mistress.. never”.

He gets up slowly, his head hanging. “And I would never ask you too, you are right, you are worth much more than that”.

“Will.. you should leave now”. I say softly. “Go back to your wife and at least try to make her happy”.

“We are not.. we are not sharing rooms”. He mumbles. “She don’t.. She didn’t want this either”.

I stare at him. “You are not sharing.. rooms ?”

“No.. it didn’t feel right”. He lifts his head. “I don’t want to.. you know.. live as man and wife”.

“But you have too.. one day you will be King Will”. I don’t know what else to say. “You should still go, you shouldn’t be here”.

He reaches out, taking my hand again. “I can’t ask you to forgive me, because I can’t even forgive myself.. but can I ask one thing of you.. one little thing”.

“You can ask.. what is it ?” I look at him, his blue eyes seem to contain so much pain, but also love and promises.

“A kiss, one kiss to last me a lifetime, to carry me through life and duty”. He says softly, taking a step closer.

My heart beats erratically. “Maybe just one.. like a goodbye kiss”.

“Yeah”. He mumbles, his hand coming up to touch my cheek, as he is suddenly way too close to me.

Then his lips are on mine, soft and yet demanding and I feel myself melt into his embrace. Forgetting the pain, forgetting the betrayal, feeling like I am exactly where I need to be.

I have no idea how long it has been, when he slowly pulls away and looks at me, his cheeks streaked with tears. “Thank you”.

“You better leave Will”. I reach to touch his chin softly. “Goodbye my love”

“I prefer, ‘until later my love’”. He moves backwards to the door. “I will fight to find a way”.

Then he is gone and I throw myself on the bed, crying tears I thought I had no more of, knowing it is false hope, there is no way, it really was goodbye”.