After our dinner we returned to the house and began winding down for the night. I jumped in the shower for a few seconds to relax and then dressed into sweats and a muscle shirt before I moved to my favorite spot in my room, the couch that sat before the portrait of Rosalie and myself. I was so focused on the picture that I didn't even realise when the door opened and Koti came in. The only thing I noticed was when she took a seat beside me on my couch.
I snapped out of my trance and quickly looked at her. She was looking at the picture.
"She is really pretty, is that your fiance?" She asked.
I nodded my head. "Yeah that's her. Her name was Rosalie." I said quietly.
For a few minutes all was quiet. I knew something was wrong because I could hear Koti's heart beat speeding up.
"What's wrong?" I asked her.
A saw the gleam of a tear sliding down her face before she quickly wiped it away. "I have to tell you something." she said in a shaky voice.
I adjusted my seating to get a better look at her. She looked torn apart. I quickly pulled her into my arms and held her. The moment her skin touched mine I felt my throat inflame. I quickly held my breath and pushed her gently away before I rose to my feet.
"I'm sorry." I whispered. "I'll be right back." I turned quickly and headed upstairs towards Carlisle's office where he kept his medical things. I hoped that he had a few bottles of blood on hand if not I'd have to head off into the woods to try and find an animal which could take several minutes.
I began rifling through desks and drawers before I checked in a fridge. I immeadiately took some of the bags of blood and was about to open it before I stopped. This was human blood, I wasn't allow to have human blood. The scent of the blood that had been subtle to me began quickly growing overwhelming by the millisecond. I quickly shoved it back in the fridge and gripped the desk to try and center myself.
My breathing grew deeper as I tried to decide what to do. I could drink this blood, this human blood and loose all ounce of respect I had for myself or I could leave this house and hunt animals to sooth myself. The only thing I didn't like was the thought of leaving Koti downstairs in a disraught condition. I wanted to be there for her but being there for her at this moment would test me beyond my control.
I quickly grabbed the phone from the desk and dialed the first person I thought of.
"Hello?"
"Edward, I need your help." I began.
"What is it?" he asked me a bit worried.
"When you first met Bella how did you keep from attacking her and drinking her blood?" I asked.
There was a long pause. "Imagine the scent of her blood. Do you feel that pain?" he asked me.
I closed my eyes and thought about how her blood smelled when I got too close. I quickly brought my hand up to my throat as the pain became over bearing to the point I was tempted to drink the human blood in the fridge.
"Yes I feel it." I said tensed.
"Okay, well the pain I felt when I was near Bella I knew would only grow worse if I was to give in to my temptations. The only difference was the pain I wouldn't ever be able to get rid of. Imagine living with that pain for the rest of my existence which is forever. The thought of losing Bella..." Edward trailed off.
"Thanks for that insight." I said before I hung up.
I looked towards the fridge and then looked towards the door. I thought about what Edward told me and I knew that I needed to overcome this. If Edward could do it for Bella then I could do it for Koti. I headed out of the office and downstairs to my bedroom where Koti was still sitting on the couch.
I quickly moved to take my seat beside her and then very carefully moved her back to my arms. After a few seconds I realized that I liked the feeling of her in my arms more than I liked her blood.
"So what were you going to tell me about?" I asked her.
She began shaking again and I could hear her heart speed up again. What was so bad about what she wanted to tell me?
"The day we got into the car accident I lied. I wasn't lost." She said as she began crying. "Before you moved up here I was living in my car out front your house. It was the only place I could go." she whispered.
I slowly released her and put a bit of distance between us as I tried to comprehend what she was telling me. The only thing I could grasp was that she had no home.
"What about your family?" I asked her.
She began crying even harder and I instinctively began rubbing her back.
"I don't have family, I'm actually lucky to be alive." She sniffled and wiped her nose before she tried to calm her erratic breathing. "My family was murdered." I looked at her. "I remember everything so clearly all the time, it never goes away."
"Some people say if you talk about things it helps." I said
She nodded her head and pulled her feet up to her chest and then leaned into my arms. For a few seconds I froze unsure of what to do but then carefully brought my arm down around her.
"When I was 12 years old my family's home was broken into by a man who had just got out of prison. He blamed my father who was his lawyer and came back for revenge. My father was upstairs reading me a story while my mother was downstairs working on some of her work from Medical school. Out of no where I heard her screams before a gun shot silenced them. My father opened the window to my bedroom and had me go out onto the roof and hide. The last thing I saw was him closing the window before I moved out of view."
She paused "I listened quietly from my hiding spot as he seemed to be arguing with someone. The man kept asking over and over where I was, he wanted my father to give me up and tell me where I was so he could kill me. My father lied and said I wasn't here and then I heard a gun shot. I was of course stupid and looked into the window, before I saw him he saw me. The last thing I remember from that night was looking at a gun through the window and then I heard the blast before I felt pain in my chest and I was falling. I died three times in the emergency room but every time they brought me back."
"Don't you have any adopted family or foster parents?" I asked her.
She shook her head. "No. A week after I was shot I left the hospital. I raised myself for the next 8 years. After the second week that the county searched for my I was announced dead."
"How did you stay hidden?"
"I stole some hair dye from a store and dyed my hair black." She said simply. I could hear from the way her heart slowed a bit that she felt bad about her small crime.
"How did you get into college without a high school diploma?"
"I- I-" I could hear her heart quicken. "I hacked into the system and added my name to the roster and confirmed all my information." she said quickly before breaking into tears again. "I'm such a criminal." she cried.
I chuckled low enough for her not to hear before I patted her back comfortingly. "It's okay, you aren't the only one in the world who has done something like this."
She wiped her eyes. "You should be mad at me for bringing you into this." she replied.
I shook my head. "You did what you had to do. The decision wasn't the easiest to make but it's made you into a beautiful, smart, talented woman. Your decisions brought you to me and I'm grateful." I took a deep breath. It was now or never, she needed to know about me. "You asked me why I was always cold, do you still want to know?"
I saw as her eyes spaced a bit like a human did when they were thinking. After a second she looked at me and nodded. "Why are you cold all the time?" she asked me.
"Because I'm a vampire." I said plainly.
I watched Koti look at me before she laughed shortly. "No seriously, are you sick? Is that what makes you cold?"
I shook my head. "No I swear. I'm a vampire."
"Impossible, if you were you would have drank my blood." she replied.
"I can prove it."
"Then do it!" She snapped.
I was alarmed by her sudden anger but then I realized it was probably more fear and uncertainty. I rose to my feet and held out my hand which she hesitated to take at first. I then took her outside and lifted her onto my back before I took off at a run. I jumped the cliff, causing her to scream and landed in the water before I started running so fast that I was literally walking on water.
"Okay, Okay!" She screamed. "I believe you now take me back."
I obeyed immeadiately and headed back to the cliff and scaled it before I set her to her feet on the ground. The moment I let go of her she looked at me and began putting distance between herself and me. I could hear her heart speeding up and I knew she was scared.
"Koti." I called to her as I moved forward.
Before I could reach out to her she turned and ran off towards the lining of the forest. I stood there and watched her disappear. For six hours I stayed rooted to that spot hoping she would return but I was unfortunate. So much for my wish, I thought as I looked up at the sky.
I quickly ran into the house and picked up the phone and dialed a number.
"Emmett?" Edward said immeadiately.
"What happens when things don't work out in your favor?" I asked.
I heard a bit of movement and then the sound of a door closing. "What happened Emmett? You didn't kill her did you?"
"No, I told her about me being a vampire and she ran. What am I suppose to do, I think I love her." I replied. I was caught short by my own words.
"The only thing you can do is just wait. Maybe it was too much for her to take in at one moment but when her mind is able to comprehend this and accept it she might come back to you. Just let her go and if she truly feels the same way about you she will come back."
"Thanks bro." I replied.
"Emmett, we miss you man." Edward replied.
"I miss you too." I said before I hung up.
I moved to stare out the window at the trees I saw her disappear into. "Please come back." I whispered.