Love and War: Short Story Collection

The Holly and the Ivan - Billie Arlen, Part Two

December 24th

Today was the day. Finally. The magic would hit us any minute now.

I had planned everything in my mind. We would do plenty of activities before going up the window to watch the snow.

I watched as the Christmas tree’s shadow kept getting longer and longer until the room was plunged into the dark with only the colourful lights to brighten the place.

“Ivan?” I heard her timid voice coming from beside me. “Ivan, are you— woah!”

Woof!

“Buster! Get off her!” I grabbed my dog by the collar, forcing him to let go of Holly who was sitting in the snow, laughing hysterically.

“It’s okay, Ivan! Buster just took me by surprise, didn’t you, boy? You can let him go. Come on, Buster. Come say hello again!”

I let go of my dog, warning him with my eyes to mind his manners. He sat politely beside her, licking her hand when she petted him, the only sign of his excitement being the furious wagging of his tail. Good boy.

“How does it feel?”

“I love Buster. Who’s a good boy? You’re a good boy. Yes, you are.”

She was smiling so brightly just being in Buster’s presence. I could only hope to make that smile last until the end of the night.

“I’m glad you like my friend, but I meant about being able to move? How is that going for you when you do not have a dog pushing you on your bum?”

“Oh! That.” She laughed. “I think I’m going to love it!” She took notice of the small, golden, shimmering cloud escaping and reentering her mouth with every breath she took.

“That’s the magic, but nobody knows how it really works.” I laughed. “Now, are you ready for our first stop?”

“Absolutely.” She took the hand I was holding out and got up. “Are you telling me, or is it a surprise?”

“Close your eyes.”

“Surprise it is.”

I liked that in the short time we had gotten to know each other, she had come to trust me. I watched our steps carefully for anything that could’ve thrown her off balance. She was walking with ice skates, after all.

Buster was running ahead of us before coming back when he made it too far. He kept looking between us and further down the road, barking happily as if that would motivate us to walk faster.

Slowly but surely, we made it to our first destination.

“You can open your eyes, Holly.”

I thought I had a sure shot, bringing her ice skating on the lake, but the terrified expression on her face made me rethink all the plans I had made for the evening.

“Holly, I’m so sorry! I thought you would love it. We can do something else. We don’t have to—”

“What if I don’t remember?” The desperate look in her eyes made me want to take her in my arms.

“Holly…” She surprised me by burying herself in my coat.

“I’m scared, Ivan. What if I fall? I can’t shake the feeling the hard ice is dangerous.”

“I’m sure you would do just fine, but I don’t wish you to worry about anything tonight. So, just wait here with Buster. I have an idea.”

I jogged to the shack at the side of the lake. Even if the owner was as real as I was, he never had any use for the skates hanging on the wall. Not that he could’ve taken them down, anyway. The dog sled that was placed nearby, however…

“Good evening, Fred!”

“Ivan, Merry Christmas! What can I do for you?”

“I would like to borrow your sled, please. It’s for Holly.”

“Isn’t she the girl that actually has real ice skates?”

“She is, but she is scared of falling.”

“How can she be scared of falling if she was made to skate?”

I explained to Fred how Holly had shocked me when we first talked. How she remembered nothing about the magic of December and how just now she wasn’t even sure to remember how to skate.

“Oh… Oh.”

“What is it? Can I help her? You have to tell me!”

“Just make sure she doesn’t hurt herself.”

“Of course! I won’t let anything happen to her, but there’s something you aren’t telling me, Fred. I need to know. Please.” I was not above begging.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” He glanced to the side, and I spotted his wife, Lucy. She had been watching us.

“It’s okay, my love. You can tell him. Remember how you felt. We have to help.”

With a sigh, my friend looked up from his counter. “It was before you got here. Lucy and I had been together for many Christmases already, more in love with every passing year.”

I couldn’t help but picture myself with Holly. I dreaded the end of the night just as much as I was excited to spend many more with her.

“One year, when December arrived, I called for Lucy, like I always did. I screamed and yelled, but she wasn’t answering. I tried to convince myself we had been packed differently, and something was preventing us from hearing each other. We had been separated a couple of minutes before midnight. I wasn’t sure something had happened to her, but I had this constant feeling that my Lucy was not okay.

“It’s only when I saw Mrs. Nicholls take the pieces of my Lucy and spread them delicately on the table that I understood something had happened to her.”

I had no words to offer my friend, unease settling deep in my stomach. Lucy had been broken before? I tried not to, but I couldn’t stop my eyes from searching for any sign of cracks on Lucy. Seeing me looking at her, she stepped around the counter to face me.

“Here.” She pointed to a very fine line along the hem of her sweater. “And here. And here.” She pointed to her ankle and her elbow.

“Those were the bigger fractures,” she explained. “My whole back was in much smaller pieces. Mrs. Nicholls had to use tweezers and a magnifying glass to glue me back to life. It took her days. She got me ready minutes before sunset.”

“On Christmas Eve?”

“Yes,” Fred answered. “All this time I had to look and pray she would be okay. I guess, in a sense, I was glad she could not talk because who knows if she would’ve been in pain? You know, like when Mr. Nicholls tried to hang the wreath?”

“He brought his hammer down on his own fingers instead! He was screaming so much. Mrs. Nicholls said he had broken his… oh. She said he had broken his fingers.”

“Exactly,” Fred said with a sombre look. “So I waited until the last piece was glued and hoped she would come back to me at sunset.”

“I did.” Lucy continued, taking Fred’s hand in hers. “I came back, but I had no idea what was going on. I had no recollection of ever meeting Fred or even being alive at all before.”

“Just like Holly,” I whispered to myself. “Holly has probably been broken before.”

“That’s why you have to make sure she doesn’t get hurt,” Fred said, bringing the sled by my side.

“I will protect her. Thank you, Fred." I tipped my hat towards his wife. “Lucy.”

I had merely made it six inches away from the shack when I heard Lucy call my name.

“Lucy?”

“I forgot to tell you! It’s something I heard Mrs. Nicholls murmured after she had set my ankle back. I was whole again and she apologized for not seeing sooner I was broken. She said she had faith in Fred, though. Said he was a good man and would help me find my way again.”

“What do you think that meant?”

“I’m not sure. Maybe there is still time after a fracture?”

“Time for what?”

“I don’t know. I just thought I should tell you.”

“Thank you Lucy. Merry Christmas!”

“Merry Christmas, Ivan.”

***

I walked back to Holly with the dog sled. She was patiently waiting by the lake, watching Buster move around in the snow like a mole digging a tunnel.

“Your carriage, my lady,” I said, making her turn around to look at the dog sled. “I figured you don’t need to stand to move across the lake.”

My heart almost leapt out of my chest. She was looking at me with the most dazzling smile.

“Ivan! This is brilliant! Thank you!” She ran to me, well as close to running as she could in her skates, and wrapped her arms around me. I hugged her back, happy to have erased the frown from her face.

“Ready, princess?” I asked, bending at the waist in a ceremonial bow.

She giggled and took her place in the sled, Buster happily jumping in too. We did a few laps around the lake, only stopping to wish some friends of mine a joyful evening. They all gave me a smug look when I introduced Holly as my friend. What was I supposed to say? I knew I had to ask her about it before telling people she was mine. I never had a girlfriend before, but I knew that much.

When we grew tired of the lake, we went for a walk around the village. It took Holly about five steps on her skates for me to insist she got back into the sled. I pushed her on the village's busy streets, showing her my favourite places and telling her about their owners.

The skates made it easy to refuse the many invitations we got for the big snowball fight in the clearing. Truth be told, I was glad for the opportunity to spend more time alone with Holly.

Woof!

And Buster.

I picked up two hot chocolates for us. I held strong and didn’t trade mugs with Timothy so he could have marshmallows in his. Over the years, he had perfected the art of the puppy-dog eyes. With his runny nose making him look like he was on the verge of crying… We all knew better by now, but some still indulged him from time to time.

“If you could hold on to this while I drive your royal carriage to our last spot before the spectacle.”

“A spectacle? What spectacle?”

“The snow in the window, of course!”

“Oh Ivan! I cannot wait to see it up close!”

“Very soon, princess.” Turned out, I liked to call her princess. She was my princess. My precious treasure and I would protect her fiercely. No breaking on my watch.

***

“It’s breathtaking, Ivan! I have never seen anything like that before,” she exclaimed, then realizing what she said, she started laughing. “I guess that describes the whole evening, huh?”

“It’s true, but I know what you mean. I’ve seen the fire before and it still amazes me every time. It’s always different, like the snow.”

“How long can we stay? I don’t want to miss the snow with the moonlight.”

“I’ll make sure you see it. Just enjoy the view for now. And the warmth.”

“It would be warmer if you’d join me in the sled, you know.”

I swallowed thickly, straightening out my clothes as if that would change anything at all.

“I don’t think it’s made for… We’d have to…”

She simply got up and patted the blanket lying on the sled.

“What if I sit in between your legs? That would work. We could share the blanket.”

“T-that would work.” I touched the collar of my shirt to find the top button still undone, leaving me with the idea of being close to her as the reason for my quickening breathing.

When she leaned against my chest and I wrapped my arms around her, linking our fingers together, I wished to never move again. I kept rubbing small circles with my thumb on her hand, humming carols and watching the fire dance for us.

I don’t know when I moved from her hand to her wrist, but she snuggled closer, so I kept exploring her soft skin with the tip of my fingers until…

“Holly?”

“Yes?”

“I think I know what happened to you.”

“Really? Please, explain yourself!”

I had made the choice to keep Lucy’s story to myself until I was sure this was what had happened to her too. Sensing the proof underneath my finger, I took a deep breath and told Holly everything I had learned. We looked carefully and found another scar over her knee, just at the hem of her skirt and two more on the blades of her skates.

Determined to keep her safe, I took her back in my arms. She couldn’t cry like the Nicholls would when they got too emotional, but I could sense her distress nonetheless.

“I will protect you, Holly. You won’t break again, not while I’m around. I promise.”

“I’m so glad I met you, Ivan.”

“Me too, princess. If I could, I’d write Mrs. Nicholls a Christmas card to thank her for bringing you to me this year.”

“I’m not a gift, silly!”

“As far as I’m concerned, you’re the best Christmas gift I could’ve ever wished for. I won’t ever need anything else.”

We stayed in silence for a while longer, letting the warmth of the fire cover us like another blanket.

***

I woke up slowly, not moving too much for fear of disturbing the sleeping beauty in my arms. She was too cute, snuggled against me, holding Buster close to her. My friend was belly up, snoring lightly, clearly living his best life.

I replayed that last thought in my mind, and I was suddenly wide awake.

We had fallen asleep.

I was supposed to take her to see the snow and we had fallen asleep instead.

Nononononononono.

Wait.

I could move. That was a good sign. I wasn’t feeling tingly. Another good sign. I had fallen asleep before and I remembered the tingling waking me up. That meant we still had time. We could still watch the snow.

“Still wanna see the snow?” I whispered into Holly’s ear.

“Of course! We didn’t miss it, did we? It’s not midnight soon, is it?”

“We still have time. Probably less than I had planned since we fell asleep, but we still have enough time. Don’t worry.”

“What are we waiting for? Let’s go!”

I laughed, watching her jump off the sled. That sentiment was short-lived and my heart almost stopped when she fell back on me because of her skates. Those damn skates that kept her from being steady on her feet. More at risk of falling and… I wished I could do something about it. I would carry her in my arms or with a sled each Christmas for the rest of our lives – I did not care one bit about that, but part of me wanted her to be free. I wanted her to run and chase after Buster in the field near the barn. I wanted my princess to jump in my arms without being afraid of falling on her way to me. I wanted her to have it all.

“Careful, Holly.”

“Sorry,” she said, getting up slowly this time.

“That’s okay. I like that you’re excited for the show.” I held her hand and guided her back into the sled. “Just sit tight. I’ll get us to the ladder in no time. Come on Buster, up on!”

***

She looked up from the bottom of the ladder, a low whistle leaving her perfect lips. “That ladder is so big.”

She tried to reach the first bar, and we both saw the problem instantly. She was too short. The few inches I had on her made all the difference for me. And with the skates on her feet, no way she could stand on her tiptoes to gain a little more height.

As much as I had felt on top of the world earlier, seeing the devastated look on her face broke something inside of me. I had been talking to her about the snow for weeks and she wouldn’t be able to see it up close.

Unless…

“Get on my back,” I told her. “I’ll carry you.”

“Ivan, this is crazy! I’m too heavy! What if you fall? Just get up and tell me what you see!”

“I’m not gonna fail,” I said with so much determination, she had no choice but to believe me. “Trust me, princess. I got you. We see that snow together, or we don’t see it at all.”

I turned my back to her and knelt down without waiting for her answer, hoping with my heart in my throat she would put her trust in me. I felt a tentative hand on my shoulder and I couldn’t help the smile that stretched across my face.

I made sure she was holding onto me, using even the rope from the sled to tie around us. I had left Buster at the bottom of the ladder. I would have to go back for him. Making two trips was safer for everyone.

We made our way to the top without issue. I untied the rope and dropped to my knees to help her get down easily.

“You can sit here. That’s my favourite spot,” I told her.

She shivered, and I felt a cold breeze coming from a small crack in the window frame.

“Maybe you should sit elsewhere. I don’t want you to get too cold.”

“No, I want to stay in your favourite spot. Just bring the blanket back with you when you get Buster?”

I nodded and started my descent to get Buster.

My foot had barely touched the ground when I heard a scream.

“HOLLY!” I yelled. “HOLLY! ARE YOU OKAY?”

“I THINK SO! JUST GET BUSTER!”

I was already securing my dog inside my jacket and hurrying back towards the ladder.

I’m sure I climbed the ladder faster than I ever had in my life, and yet the last bar felt further away each time I grabbed a new one.

I made it to the top, Buster jumping out of my coat to run to Holly. He moved around her anxiously, his nose trying to sniff out whatever trouble she was having.

I ran to her and knelt at her side, looking to see if she was hurt. It was only when my eyes reached her foot that I saw what had happened. She was missing one blade, leaving her with a clean plain sole, like a regular boot.

“It just snapped right off. I tried to take it, but I made things worse. It just crumbled in my hands.” I noticed the bits and pieces of grey and white porcelain lying on her lap.

I lowered myself to inspect the blade still in place. It looked ready to crack. I did not dare touch it.

“How bad is it?”

“I don’t know. It looks more fragile than earlier… How do you feel?”

“Panic aside, I feel… the same?”

“That must be a good sign,” I said, trying to stay positive. “Maybe the cold isn’t good. I think we should go back down and sit by the fire again.”

“I want to see the snow. Please, Ivan.”

Torn between keeping her safe and seeing her happy, one look at her and I knew she had won. I sat beside her, draping the blanket over us. Buster climbed on me as if he knew Holly was off-limit.

“I guess we can spare a couple of minutes. We don’t have much time before midnight, anyway,” I said, looking at the clock telling me we had 14 minutes left. Less than that before the tingling sensation began. She leaned her head against my shoulder and I laced my fingers with hers.

I barely looked at the snow. My eyes were locked on her. She was so gorgeous, with her eyes full of wonder and excitement. I was also watching her for any sign that losing that one blade was affecting her, but she really seemed to be okay. The blanket was not helping much to shield us from the breeze, however.

Minutes passed and soon I felt the tingling sensation on my skin.

“I would like nothing more than to stay here, but it’s time to go, princess.” I put Buster on the ground and got up, readying myself. My dog was barking happily around me, enjoying his last minutes of freedom. “Can you feel the tingling?”

“No.”

“What do you mean you—”

My words got stuck in my throat. My heart filled with anguish. My mind went blank.

No. Please, no.

The gravity of what had just happened did not seem to have registered in Holly’s mind yet because she was the pure image of calm.

She was looking into her hollow arm with a curious expression on her face, no sense of urgency or fear twisting her features.

“Princess?” I tried to keep my voice calm despite the terror gripping me.

“I think something is wrong with me this time. Look.” She lifted her arm as if I couldn’t see the damage before.

“Don’t move, Holly.” I sat closer and took her broken hand in mine, wishing I could fix it with my gaze alone. “We’ll think of something. I’m sure we can fix this. Does it hurt? How do you feel?”

“I feel… empty.”

My gorgeous girl. Her colours seemed less vibrant when I looked at her. I prayed it was the light playing a trick on me, but I knew it wasn’t. The blinking of her eyes was slower, more noticeable. The rise and fall of her chest was shallow, barely visible. She was turning back into a figurine while I could still move freely. Something was definitely wrong. Then I noticed the thin but steady flow of magic leaving her through her open wrist.

Before I could think of what I could do, I was three bars down the ladder.

The pull. I was going back to my spot. I tried to move back up, but the urge to keep going down was strong. Buster was barking at me, the pull affecting him too.

“It’s okay, Ivan. You can go. I’ll stay here.”

“No. I am not leaving you alone. I’m staying. Just give me a second. I’m coming back to you.”

With great effort, I made my way back up and crawled to take my rightful place beside her. My loyal Buster was doing the same, a painful whine accompanying his every step. We had always moved together, which meant that if I stayed here, he would too.

“You should’ve left me here.”

“I’m not going anywhere.”

“Ivan…”

“Tell me what to do, Holly. Tell me how to help,” I begged.

“Just hold me.”

“Okay.” I answered, getting up to sit behind her, like we did on the sled, Buster on my side. He barely put his chin on her lap to comfort her when another crack resonated. I looked in horror at her broken leg, fractured at the knee where she had been injured before. I tightened my hold on her and desperation clawed at my heart when I felt her whole body go even stiffer.

“Please, Ivan, don’t let go.”

“I’m right here, princess.”

Don’t let go. Just hold me.

She apologized for not seeing sooner I had been broken.

Glue me back to life.

I was whole.

What if…

It was worth a shot.

“Holly, I think I can fix this before it’s too late. Trust me?” She nodded.

I took her broken leg, and another idea crossed my mind. This was already a crazy plan, so what was just a little more? I gave a small push and watched the second blade break in a clean cut, shattering on the ground.

“Next year you are running with me, princess.” I moved her leg back in place, noticing the magic had stopped pouring out. I wrapped my legs around her to secure it in place.

I did the same with her hand, putting mine over to keep a steady pressure so it wouldn’t move. Her body kept going hard in my arms. It wasn’t enough. She must’ve lost too much magic.

I couldn’t lose her, so I tried the only thing I could think of.

I kissed her.

I kissed her with everything I had.

I wanted her to have it all. All the magic I had in me was hers if that meant she was safe. The last thing I remembered was feeling her other hand grip my face, her fingers that had gone stiff digging into my hair.

Then the clock struck midnight.

December 25th

‘Twas the morning after Christmas Eve and Mary Nicholls smiled fondly at the sight of Ivan and Holly on the windowsill. They were in one piece, two lovers kissing with a cute dog by their side.

Unbroken and whole. Shiny and bright. One completely new figurine.

“I told you he was perfect for her,” she said to her husband, a knowing look in her eyes.

Pen Name: Billie Arlen

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