Wings to my Butterfly (My Brothers Best Friend)

five.

ZOE

__________

The warm water surrounded me, fingers gliding through the bubbles as they popped. Waves of vanilla filled my senses with the steam that hung in the room. Even the bath Ryan had run for me was perfect. I groaned. That beautiful i***t. Not only did he make my entire body feel good, but he ran me a goddamn bath. Of course he did.

How did we even end up with his head between my legs? The mental image made me throb, I cursed my vágina through the water “You’re the reason I’m in this mess…”

“…but god it felt good” I sighed, resting my head back against the porcelain tub.

I could sit here swearing to the skies about today, but part of me already missed his hands on my skin. The walls I had built so high he always managed to break down in seconds. Why he cared for me, I don’t think I’d ever understand. He should know better… he deserves better.

Sinking under the water, I slowly release the air from my lungs. Watching the pockets of air ripple along the surface as they popped. I envied the way the bubbles just disappeared. Something I never figured out how to do.

I was always the loud one, the one who smiled bright and entertained the crowd. But in all honesty, I wanted to float away, like the bubbles. I didn’t know how to blend in, no matter what I always had to put on a show, make everything exciting. But it was just the walls, it was how I protected myself. So no one knew how scared I was to be seen.

But pleasing everyone was never possible, I always made mistakes. I’d get too loud, too care free, just trying to prove to everyone that I was happy. At the end of the night, when I was alone, I’d replay everything in my head until I felt sick and tears ran down my face.

So I’d turn to the water, to hide my tears, and watch the bubbles disappear. My little messed up ritual that I’d never let anyone see.

Pushing myself up through the water I gasped, finally taking a breath of air. The warm water began to grow cold, my fingers pruning from the hour that had passed. I reluctantly stepped out, pulling the plug, watching the water circle the drain as I ran a towel along my skin.

The bliss of the warm steamy air began to dissipate along with the fog on the mirror. Today's shenanigans were only the beginning. Tomorrow, I was going to have to face Ryan again. This time with the image of his tongue between my thighs, licking me in all the right ways.

If I was going to keep my walls up, I needed a truck of cement to keep them there.

***

An annoying buzz filled my ears, ringing through the apartment again and again. I groaned, fluttering my eyes open as I looked around for its source. I was not, never had been, never will be, a morning person. And with the little sleep I got last night, the last thing I wanted to do was leave this damn bed.

The buzzing that continued said otherwise. Scanning the dark room, I reached around until finally feeling my phone. The light shined bright, my eyes took a minute to adjust before my jaw dropped. Fúck… it was ten o’clock, I was meant to meet Ryan out the front an hour ago.

I practically fell out of bed, running out of my room and to the door which sure enough was buzzing. This stupid system has killed me ever since Belle and I moved in. Clicking on the intercom my throat went dry, not a word was spoken but I knew who it was at the other end.

The second I knew he was in the building I rushed back to my room. Finding the closest pair of black jeans, discarded on the floor along with a big baggy white jumper that said something in some language I’d never bothered to learn. My heart raced as I struggled into my clothes, jumping in an attempt to pull the tight fabric over my ass, all the while looking for a fúcking pair of shoes.

Under my bed, behind my door, under one of the many piles of clothes, and nothing. Did I even own a pair of damn shoes? I panicked, rushing from my room only to run into a hard wall. The hard wall with arms that wrapped around me, bracing myself frame so I didn’t fall.

The great fúcking wall with shoulders I gripped onto, with hands that sunk into the small curve of my back. I stilled, meeting Ryan’s angry eyes. The panic I was feeling only grew worse seeing the fire burning in his gaze.

“I-I’m sorry. Y-you must’ve been waiting for an hour, oh god or longer and I’m not… I’m not even ready. You should just go without me…” Shaking my head, I pushed on his shoulders attempting to put space between us.

His grip loosened on me ever so slightly as he backed me up against the wall “…I-I can’t even find shoes, I-I’m…”

I continued to stutter, falling into the surface behind me barely registering Ryan as he turned away. I stood still, trying to find that damn concrete, the cracks already showing just from seeing his face. God I was pathetic. The panic that consumed me turned into embarrassment. Covering my face I groaned, frustrated with myself for turning into a blubbering mess.

As I calmed myself, I heard a soft creak. Opening my fingers ever so slightly I was taken back seeing Ryan kneeling before me.

The anger in his eyes was gone as he reached for my foot, one hand wrapped gently around my heel, the other held a black kitten heel. I watched as he guided my foot into the shoe, resting it against his knee before tying the strap around my ankle.

His hands calm with their movements, guiding my covered foot back to the floor before reaching for the next. Slowly I dropped my hands from my eyes, them falling to my lips as I watched Ryan delicately tie the black strap. This time he held me close, running a hand up the back of my Jean clad leg before he finally stood.

“Are you ready?” He asked calmly now looking down at me.

I furrowed my brows “Aren’t you mad?”

He stood silently, slipping his hands into his suit pants. Looking over my body with a heated gaze as he spoke “Frustrated perhaps, but mad, at you? I could never”

His eyes deadpanned mine as he spoke those last few words. I didn’t have to ask what he was referring to when he said that. The memories of the past tried to creep in, the memories of when I hurt him, betrayed him.

I swallowed, shutting them down before they could come out. Planting a smile on my face I looked between him and my feet “Don’t you think the kitten heels are a bit much?”

He followed my gaze for a moment, though when he looked back up I could tell he wasn’t buying it. Yet he played along, slipping a hand around my waist and guiding me towards the door “Would you prefer I carry you over my shoulder?”

Rolling my eyes I pushed his arm away, stomping past him as I grabbed my bag “Hands off Mister”

He chuckled, following behind me as we left the apartment block.

***

The car ride was longer than the ones yesterday, I silently thanked the distance since I got to both wear heels and sit on my àss.

For the first twenty minutes I stubbornly sat in my seat, keeping my eyes focused out the window while the radio played. Though I grudgingly accepted his offer when he opened the passenger door, I couldn’t seem to look at him. Every time I did, the image of him smirking, licking a path up my thigh to my…

“You okay there?” I snapped my head, raising my brows at Ryan, confused by his query.

“Huh? Yeah why?” He chuckled, dropping his eyes to my lap before turning back to the road.

Following his gaze, I looked down to my lap where my hands were wedged between my tensed thighs. The way they were positioned however probably looked to him, like I was rubbing myself. Hell, with the things I was just picturing I needed something to take the edge of.

“Don’t think you're so lucky to get a free show, my hands were cold” I pulled my hands from my thighs, crossing my arms over my chest with a huff.

He hummed with a nod “Is that why you were rubbing your thighs together?”

“Friction makes heat” I snapped, holding my ground despite the blush that flushed across my skin. Though I was lying through my bloody teeth the logic still stood right? Maybe a long car ride wasn’t the best thing.

Returning my gaze out the window, I pulled my legs up under myself, crossing them on the seat. Cursing the heels as they dug into my thighs. Uncomfortable and annoyed, I threw my head back into the headrest with a groan.

“You’re cute when you’re angry” Ryan stated, leaning closer to me as he rounded a harsh corner on the road.

I rolled my eyes at the smirk planted on his lips “Bite me”

His eyes lit up as the words left my lips. The smirk turned into a mischievous grins, his eyes flicking between the road and me as he scanned them down my body.

“You'd like that wouldn't you" The sudden pulse in my core made me bite my tongue.

I would, I so f*****g would... But I would never admit it, I couldn't. Walls Zoe, walls. Clearing my throat I flashed Ryan a sarcastic smile "I think your messed up mind would rather carry out that fantasy"

"Oh, I would" Smile dropping my thighs again clenched, I knew he caught it immediately as my hands shot down in an attempt to cover myself. No blaming it on cold hands this time. Leaning forward I turned the awful music up to drown out the white noise. Any distraction right now was welcome, there was still another hour to go.

Why would Landon even pick a house so far away, no way is my stupid brother taking my best friend this far away. In my mind, this house was already stamped with a big old 'Vetto' Not that I was going to tell Ryan that after letting him to the middle of nowhere. Maybe it could be a holiday house?