1.4
1280 Words
“You must be tired.”
Sawyer was still leaning against the fridge. It was obvious he needed to rest, but Selene knew there was still a part of him that had the same attitude she was used to carefully navigating with Robin.
He wasn’t going to admit he was tired, or hungry, or in pain. But he would accept her help if she offered it.
“What gave it away?”
“I guess you just aren’t your usual cheerful self. You can take my bed tonight, and we can sort something out properly tomorrow… if you’re going to be here for more than a couple of days, I mean.”
“I should just explain this to you. It’ll be easier.”
“Easier for you, or for me?”
Sawyer exhaled through his nose. He was being selfish again. She had made it clear she didn’t want to know why he was there, and he was pushing her to listen.
“Easier for me.”
“There are things I need to know… things like how long you will be here. What you did? I don’t know if I want to know that. I know we’ve been ignoring the obvious here, but I have a son now. Keeping him safe is my only real concern, so if you’re going to tell me you did something massively f****d up, I don’t want to hear it.”
He thought carefully about what to say. What it was that she needed to know, and what it was he wanted to say.
“Six months. I’ll be here for six months if I don’t f**k up.”
“Anything else I need to know?”
She started to walk away, and he followed her into the living room where she made herself comfortable as if it had always been her home.
He leaned against the door frame at first, but he started to feel bad at looking down at her again and moved to the couch to continue the conversation.
“As far as Elizabeth is concerned I am dead. And if I screw up it’s going to say that way.”
“And if you don’t screw up? Are you going back, or is she coming here?”
“I don’t care, as long as I’m with her again. I just want her to be happy.”
“Stay here.”
“What’s wrong?”
“I mean… stay here, don’t go back. You were happy here, I was happy here, she was happy here. Were you ever happy after you went back there? Either of you? Because I was miserable the entire f*****g time. I had to hide the fact I was upset about losing Robin. I had to deal with people gossiping because someone as perfect as you should never have considered even looking at an Omega. I had to live with knowing they were right. I had to deal with your psychopath of an ex trying to kill me because she thought I had no right to have your child.”
“I’m going to kill her, Selene. Cordelia is…”
“…not who I am talking about. She’s a garbage person, but I lived with that particular brand of garbage my entire life and bitchy narcissists don’t bother me.”
“You mean Elle.”
He hung his head and felt a lump in his throat.
“It hurt me to see you give her another chance as a friend. I regret not asking you to kill her.”
“She saved Elizabeth’s life.”
“I know what happened. At least some of it. I know she saved Elizabeth, and I know why she did it.”
“Please don’t say it. I really didn’t handle that whole situation well, it’s still a sore issue.”
“Really? I hadn’t noticed you were missing as I was giving birth alone and shipped immediately off to stay here because you demanded I not be there when you got back.”
“You were alone?”
“Francesca and Jonas were out, and there was no one else in the house after it was cleared out again.”
“Selene… that’s horrific, and I am sorry. It’s my fault you had to go through that.”
“I’m alive, and my son is safe. That’s all that matters. I mean, I am still f*****g furious at you for it, but I told Francesca I wasn’t feeling right that morning and she went out for more than 24 hours without leaving anyone with me anyway so… I guess my anger at her outweighs my anger at you?”
“Quit making excuses for me. You shouldn’t have gone through that. The fact people keep making excuses for me is how I ended up as messed up as this in the first place. I am ashamed of how badly I treated Elizabeth the night I left, and now I might never get to tell her I’m sorry. If I f**k up now, the last thing I ever said to her was basically ‘I’m about to c*m. Then I’m going to f**k off and leave you.’ I figured I’d be gone half an hour or so. I had it in my head that I was going to go back, and I’d tell her I was sorry, and we’d be a little less impersonal than before I left, and she’d fall asleep in my arms. I didn’t realize I might be leaving her forever.”
“Very few people know when they’re leaving someone for the last time, Sawyer. Whatever happened after you left that room doesn’t matter. You’re here now, and she’s still alive. Figure out what the first thing you’re going to say to her is rather than focusing on what you could have done differently.”
“The only thing I could possibly say is that I’m sorry, and that she deserves better…and that I don’t want to live there anymore, because I f*****g hate it, and so does she, and so do you, and so would your son. Being the Alpha of that pack corrupts you, and if I was more superstitious I would say it’s cursed. I know what I promised was important to you, but he would not have a happy life.”
“I know. I didn’t get pregnant thinking Tobias was going to show up and change everything. We were happy. s**t wasn’t a utopia, but we could handle it, and with one or two others it would have been perfect. I thought I was going to bring a kid into this fresh new pack led by someone who wants to do things differently and give everyone a chance. I would have been proud for him to take over as Alpha of that pack. Taking on everything that your family stands for? That is an entirely different thing. It’s f****d up, and it is not what I want for my son.”
- Writer
