Marked Yours

Chapter 1-1

Chapter 1

Nick tucked the last of his possessions into a leather bag. After setting it carefully beside the other two bags on top of a heavy wooden trunk, he straightened and stared out the window.

This small room had been his home for as long as he could remember.

It wasn’t so much that he’d miss this room or this village; it was that he was leaving everything he knew.

Nick was being remanded into the hands of a family in the only large city for nearly a thousand miles. This village, his village, Eldrid, was similar to the serfdoms of the past and existed for the exclusive reason of raising slave children to adulthood. Nick, like the other children in this village, spent their lives being educated and trained to become an asset to a master or mistress in their endeavors. He’d be leaving the mild, temperate area in the southern part of the protectorate and moving farther north and west, nearer the mountains. Nick’s path had been chosen for him when he was very young. He’d been trained and educated to be given into servitude to strangers. All because he was special.

Nick didn’t want to be special.

There had been words spoken in hushed tones so many years ago Nick didn’t even remember how old he was when he’d heard them—four, five maybe? Two of the tutors huddled with the village elders and later outsiders who would visit the village regularly. Nick only recalled bits and pieces, but it’d been enough to set the course of his life and label him distinct among the other slave children.

“The boy can describe in detail people who died here twenty years ago,” one tutor had said.

“He knew those merchants who came through last week were actually thieves by just looking at them. There are people who seek out slave children like him,” another tutor had pointed out.

Nick sighed. As he’d grown, he’d learned to keep observations like that to himself. People didn’t like it, particularly his tutors.

In a few hours what his tutors liked or didn’t like wouldn’t matter anymore. He’d be leaving Eldrid, Nick hoped it would be forever.

He took out the ornately carved wooden box, opened it, and fingered the soft leather contained within. The final gift he’d received a few short months ago from the man he’d been betrothed—given—to years ago.

The man he’d call Master.

He’d seen the man a few times a year from a distance but never met or spoken to him. They’d watched each other grow from children to teens and finally adults, their only communications being letters. Nick wondered if the same small group of men and women who’d dictated he’d be trained to fight and use weapons, required the same of his master as he grew up. It was his future master who’d sent him books to study and occasionally works of fiction to read just for fun. Sometimes Nick received food or an ornate knife or other small gift. Everything came with a note. Every four or five months there were longer letters. It was all he knew of the man and the family he’d been promised to. He’d always written back and it seemed the man cared about his words. Nick hoped the man, Todd, was as interested in him as his letters led Nick to believe. Whenever Nick saw another letter his mood soared, even if many of the other children—and some tutors—resented the attention bestowed on Nick.

Todd sometimes addressed Nick as Nicky in his letters. Nick had never heard his name spoken aloud in any way other than Nick, and then it was mostly with harshness, never with care. He wondered what it would sound like, hearing Nicky.

The letters were kind and almost affectionate, or at least Nick wanted to think them so. He’d grown up here. His training and tutoring had taken place here. There was no affection shown to Nick by anyone here—he was property, pure and simple. Maybe he read too much into the letters and gifts, but they were bright spots in Nick’s lonely life. He had dared to hope maybe the boy who became the man sending the letters might, someday, have feelings for him. Nick certainly had feelings for Todd, though he had to keep them hidden away as long as he lived in this village.

Wondering about why he’d been trained in the way he had, Nick sighed. “Hope to hell I haven’t been sold to a family of assassins.” He couldn’t see any other reason why he’d have to learn to use so many weapons. The books he’d been given to read by the village tutors ranged from history and religion to what had to have been flights of bizarre fantasy and offered him no more clues. He studied other things, of course, the sciences, mathematics, and the arts, like all the children raised here. The choice of books and Nick’s specialized education was dictated by the needs of his future master.

When the small train of wagons pulled into the village center, two of the elders bustled out to greet them. Nick recognized his master, who was riding a horse. An older man, who years ago Nick had learned was his new master’s father, climbed down from the lead wagon and strode forward to greet the elders. He was a gruff-looking man, and Nick had always been slightly afraid of him, though had never had any interaction with him.

He watched his master, Todd Ruger, as he’d done so many times over the years when Todd and his father passed through Nick’s village. He’d never once seen any gesture of kindness or affection between Todd and his father. Nick wondered if this was what his life was destined to be like. Life with a man who was cold, uncaring, and perhaps didn’t even like him?

Then Nick remembered the many letters he’d received over the years. There was nothing cold or uncaring about those letters, and for the first time Nick felt a thread of excitement coil in his belly. He was curious about his master. What was he really like? Would they be friends? More?

His insides fluttered when one of the aides serving the elders came for him. Nick shouldered his bags, but there were others to carry the trunk. The box containing his leather collar was gripped in both hands. He obediently followed the aides to the wagons. It would take two or three days, depending on the weather, to reach New Colorado City. There were trains, but they didn’t run anywhere near Nick’s small village.

“This him?” The elder Ruger stepped closer to Nick and peered at him. “What’s your name, boy?”

Nick’s eyes darted to the man’s face, well aware that the man knew Nick’s name. He finally pulled a name out of his head. John Ruger. The look of sheer anger crossing John’s features when Nick’s eyes met his for that second made Nick’s insides tremble. He dropped his eyes to the ground at once, horrified with himself for committing such a crime. “N-Nick, sir.”

“Huh. You got anything in that head?” John snapped at him.

Nick had no idea how to even begin to respond to that without getting his head removed from his shoulders, so he stood quietly, staring at the ground. He wanted to crawl away and die.

Barely paying attention to Todd swinging off his horse and tying its lead to the front wagon, Nick heard Todd’s long strides coming at him. A warm, gentle hand rested on Nick’s shoulder and pushed him back a step as Todd eased between Nick and John.

“You’re being an ass, Dad. Cut it out. He’s just a kid. We’ve had this discussion. You wanted me to do this. I’m doing it. But I’m doing it my way. Let’s not forget Nick belongs to me, not you.” Todd glanced around, not taking his hand from Nick’s shoulder. “Can we just get things finalized and get on our way?”

John nodded and took a thin leather-bound book from the only female aide. He motioned to the young woman to get on with it.

“I’m sorry,” Nick whispered when the others stepped away from him and Todd and moved closer to the first wagon. His knuckles were white around the wooden box containing his collar.

Todd turned and looked him up and down. He smiled, making his intense green eyes soften and crinkle at the edges. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Nick felt some of the tension drift out of him. He raised his head slightly and offered Todd a shy smile. The fingers on his shoulder pressed down more, filling Nick with an unexpected warmth and reassurance.

“C’mon,” Todd said in a hushed, gentle tone. “Let’s get this done. Then you and I can be left alone in our wagon.”

Nick nodded and followed Todd to the small group gathered around a table set up for the final step to complete their bonding—transfer of ownership. Somehow, being alone with Todd in their wagon didn’t sound so scary. He stood quietly behind Todd, taking in every detail. The elders, then John Ruger and another older man signed the papers in the book. Finally, they were handed to Todd, who signed without hesitation. A seal was applied on the final page before the book was closed and formally presented to Todd by the village elders.

There were a few words of congratulations, and it’s been our honor to provide this slave, and so on, exchanged between them. Except for Todd, he stood in the midst of the group, quiet, offering only a polite nod here and there.

That was what Nick’s life amounted to. Some papers were signed, and his ownership transferred from this small village, where he was simply Nick, to Todd Ruger. Though he’d have none of the rights, it did give him a surname. He was now Nick Ruger.

Next one of the older slave children rang a gong three times. Nick held the wooden box out to Todd and began to kneel as he’d been taught since he could walk.

Todd shook his head and grabbed Nick’s arm, stopping him. “No kneeling.”

A wave of hushed exclamations skimmed through the group and John Ruger gave a warning grumble, “Todd—”

To which Todd immediately snapped, “My way.” Without taking the box from Nick, Todd opened it and took the collar out, holding it in both hands. He very gently and carefully fastened it around Nick’s neck and whispered, “Nicky.”

Nick would wear his collar whenever they were out in public. Most slaves didn’t wear their collars in private unless they’d become mates to their owners. Then it symbolized their union and often accompanied exchanging vows, frequently done in private.

After following Todd to their wagon, Nick waited patiently while Todd removed his horse’s saddle and tucked it into a side compartment in the back of the covered wagon. He stuck his head inside and pulled it back out a second later. “Is that all your stuff? You get to bring everything you own, or didn’t anyone bother to tell you that?”

Nick nodded, a bit awestruck. No one had ever cared about him or his possessions in his entire twenty-two years. “Yes, sir…Master.”

Todd sighed and stepped completely behind the wagon, tugging on Nick’s sleeve for him to follow. When they were out of sight of everyone else, Todd’s hand rested on the side of Nick’s neck. “You know my name is Todd. You call me Todd, unless we’re somewhere the law says you’re required to call me otherwise. That’s rule number one. Rule two is you stay away from my father and his pack of asshole hunting buddies. You don’t go anywhere near them without me, ever.”

“Yes, sir…Todd.” Hunters. These men were hunters. That couldn’t be so bad. It gave Nick visions of spending warm summer nights under the stars, in the wilderness, tracking buffalo or deer or moose or whatever one hunted on warm summer nights.

Todd’s finger hooked under Nick’s chin, lifting until Nick was looking him in the eye. “And you look at me when you talk to me, Nicky.”

Nick’s face split into a smile. He couldn’t help it. For some reason, when Todd said Nicky, for the first time in Nick’s young life, it seemed like home. Todd grinned right back at him, and Nick’s heart fluttered; Todd was an amazingly handsome man.

“I could stand to see that smile a few times a day, too.” Todd’s hand was back on his neck again, giving it a squeeze.

When John barked that it was time to leave, Todd rolled his eyes and tipped his head to the front of the wagon. He took the box from Nick’s hands and stored that in the back of the wagon, too. After dropping the canvas cover over the opening, he headed to the front of the wagon and stepped to one side while Nick climbed into the seat. Settled beside Nick, Todd took up the team’s reins and guided them from the village and onto the open road.

Nick spent the first hour trying to get a good look at Todd and cataloging everything about him. A few inches shorter than Nick, Todd’s shoulders were broader. He had a powerful build, with a cougar’s grace. Every move he made seemed smooth, flowing, and effortless. Todd caught him looking a few times but did nothing more than smile, making his eyes twinkle. The beefy part of his shoulder bulged under his shirt, which stretched over a torso that came to a V at his slim waist. With every movement of Todd’s legs, Nick was very aware of the long, hard muscles beneath his jeans.

“You hungry?” Todd broke the silence when the sun was at its zenith. “We won’t stop until late tonight, but I’ve got—” He reached under the bench seat and pulled out a small wooden cooler. “—some provisions.” Dumping the cooler on Nick’s lap, Todd’s chin tipped at it. “Open that up for me, will you?”

Nick did so immediately, holding it at a good angle for Todd to rummage around in it with one hand. He pulled out a small bag of colorful, sugarcoated candies and held it out to Nick. Eyes widening, Nick took the package. Words came out of Todd’s mouth in a rush. “You used to write me, asking me to send you more of these, when you were little.”

When Nick sat motionless, staring at the small bag, Todd’s eyes slid toward him, his shoulders slumping slightly. “You do still like those, right? ‘Cause, dude, I brought them just for you.”

“Really?” Nick couldn’t help the smile creeping over his face.

“Yeah, really. Now crack that open and share.” Todd’s elbow nudged Nick’s arm.

As they traveled, Todd pointed out landmarks, and seemed impressed Nick knew the names of most of the area’s trees and plants. When the sun fell, he and Todd entertained themselves by pointing out stars and constellations. The more Nick talked, the happier Todd seemed to be with him.

It was close to midnight when they finally stopped to make camp. There were four wagons in all, the other three carrying two or three occupants each, and two men riding on horseback. Nick’s mind drifted back to childhood, watching Todd ride through his village a few times a year, watching him grow from a skinny boy of eleven to the powerful man he was now.

A fire was built in the center of the wagon circle, and a meal was prepared. The night air was chilled and damp, and Nick’s clothes, more suited for the southern climate, weren’t keeping him very warm. Nick wouldn’t have minded sitting near the fire to eat, even if he had to listen to John Ruger and his friends tell whatever stories they told one another. Todd, however, took his food and headed back to their wagon, so Nick followed.

He tried hard not to shiver through dinner. Everyone else had thicker coats and heavier clothes, much more prepared for the climate they were heading into than Nick. Glancing wistfully at the fire and its warmth, Nick huddled over his plate. He’d never dare ask for a coat. He was a slave. Who cared if he was cold? Slaves didn’t count in this world.

“You have any heavier clothes?”

Shaking his head, Nick mumbled, “No, Todd.”

Todd set his plate down hard on the ground and stood abruptly. Nick flinched and looked up. Todd reached into the wagon and pulled out a heavy dark-green pullover shirt. In his other hand he carried a few bottles and two glasses.

“Here, put this on. It’ll keep you warm enough for now. When we get home, you’re getting the right clothes. I’m not spending the rest of my life watching you shiver.” He set the bottles and glasses down and resettled onto the ground beside Nick before he poured dark amber liquid from one of the bottles. “You ever had whisky before?” He started to hold the small glass out to Nick, but when Nick shook his head no, Todd chuckled. “Okay, then. Not having this right now.” Grinning, Todd downed the liquid himself. Crossing his eyes, he shook his head as he swallowed. “Here, try this instead. We’ll start you off slow and work you up to the really rotgut stuff later.”

Nick laughed and took the small bottle Todd offered. He took a whiff; it didn’t smell bad. Nick took a short sip of the bottle’s contents. He pulled the bottle away and looked at it. “What is this?”

Todd had been watching him the entire time, looking almost boyish and hopeful. “Eh, you didn’t spit it back at me, so that’s good. Beer. You never had beer before?”

“No. Just water.”

“You like it?”

“Yeah, I do. It’s different. Sorta bitter at first.” He’d pulled the heavier shirt over his head. It was thick and made of a woven material that was warm and soft. Breathing in deeply, he was at once surrounded by the combined smells of gun oil, leather, and something he recognized from sitting beside Todd all day that was uniquely Todd. The beer made his throat warm, but it was the scent of Todd all around him that made warmth spread in delicate tendrils from his belly to his chest.

“Good, ‘cause I don’t do bread and water. We do what we do and keep the fine folks in the towns and villages safe at night, but they’re damn well feeding us good.”

Nick had no idea what it was Todd referred to. He’d thought since Todd and his father, and now Nick, were hunters, they’d simply track down and catch their own food if they needed to. Nick nodded, drank his beer, and finished his food. It was stew—tasty, hot, and filled with chunks of meat and vegetables in a heavy broth.

After mopping the remains of the stew from his plate with bread, Todd leaned back and grinned. “I want more. Do you want more?”

Looking up, surprised and knowing his face showed it, Nick blurted out, “I’m allowed more?”

Todd snorted. “Yes, Nick, you are.” He held out a hand for Nick to pull up on. Once righted, Todd released his hand, moved his hand to Nick’s neck, and patted gently a few times before he turned and went back to the fire.

The men there snidely asked why Nick was still wearing clothes and why they were wasting time eating. Todd ignored them. As he turned around to head back to their wagon, Todd’s eyes caught Nick’s. He smirked and shook his head.

They resettled behind the wagon, out of sight of the others, and finished eating in silence. Then, leaning forward, elbows resting on his knees, Todd rubbed at the back of his neck for a few minutes.

“So, uh, you ever been with a woman?”

Nick stared at a point between his feet and shook his head no.

Todd shifted a bit. Nick thought he sounded nervous. “A man?”

“No.” His voice came out barely above a whisper.

“Got any preference?”

Nick drew in a deep breath and looked up at Todd, who wore that boyish, hopeful expression again. “I like watching girls sometimes, but they’re sort of skinny, no muscle. I think I look at men more.”

Todd nodded and seemed satisfied with those answers. It wasn’t as if Nick had a choice. He’d been bound to another male since he was three years old. Whether he preferred men or women as s****l partners was never a consideration. Maybe he’d always been that way, or maybe he’d just trained himself to like men more. He didn’t know. It didn’t really matter.

When Todd reached out and curled warm, strong fingers around his neck, Nick leaned into the touch. He decided it was something Todd liked to do, touch him that way, and it appeared to Nick the gesture pleased Todd and made him relax. Nick had decided back in the village, the first time Todd had touched him that way, that he liked it. Not even twenty-four hours later and Nick was craving those tiny touches and counting the minutes between them, hoping for another one.

This time Todd leaned closer and pulled Nick toward him. As Todd’s lips brushed across Nick’s temple, he moaned soft and low. After pushing his nose through Nick’s hair for a few seconds, Todd pulled him in even tighter, nuzzling his cheek against Nick’s, breathing in deep. “You smell good.” Todd’s hand moved from his neck up into Nick’s hair, turning his head toward Todd.

Todd pressed his lips to Nick’s, gently licking his tongue along Nick’s lower lip. It startled him at first when Todd’s tongue slipped between his lips and into his mouth. Todd’s other arm wound around Nick’s waist and gently, slowly pulled Nick completely against him.

Todd’s tongue glided around his own and coaxed Nick’s tongue into his mouth. Todd sucked lightly on Nick’s tongue for a few seconds before pulling away. He looked at Nick, seemed to be memorizing every bit of Nick’s face before pulling him back in for another kiss. This time Nick mimicked Todd’s actions and sucked Todd’s tongue.

When Todd pulled away for the second time, they were both panting, and Nick was whimpering softly. Fingers raked tenderly through his hair, and Todd kissed his nose and then his cheek and murmured in his ear, “I’ve been waiting for forever to do that.”

Nick felt a flush creep over him. When Todd’s arm tightened even more around his middle, Nick leaned his head down so his face was pressed to the crook of Todd’s neck. “I don’t…I’ve never…” This was so embarrassing.

“It’s okay, Nicky. You’ll learn like I had to. You’ll be fine. Just us now. We’re in this together, don’t ever forget that.” Todd rested his chin on the top of Nick’s head and held him tightly. Nick had never in his life been held—not like this. He’d been held down and beaten a few times, but never had anyone simply held him. When he pressed closer and relaxed more against Todd, the other man drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly. Nick liked this, and he sensed Todd did, too.

Laughter from the direction of the fire made them both start and pull back from each other. Chuckling nervously, Todd ruffled Nick’s hair.

“We’ll save the rest for when we can be alone.” He stood, stretched, and threw the cover back on the wagon’s opening. “Just us now,” he repeated. Nick nodded, because he had the feeling he was supposed to respond somehow. “C’mon, Nicky. Get some sleep.”

Todd waited for him to get himself arranged in the back of the wagon. The bedding was soft and incredibly warm. Nick burrowed right in. Todd sat on the wagon step, gazing up at the stars. When there was another round of laughter, and this time gunshots from the vicinity of the fire, Todd reached inside the wagon and laid one hand on Nick’s ankle, his thumb moving in small circles for a few seconds.

“Don’t worry. You’re safe. I’m going to sit up for a bit more, make sure they don’t shoot each other. You go to sleep.”

When Nick awoke in the morning, Todd was pressed close beside him, warm and solid. The beefy shoulder Nick had spent so much time admiring the day before made an excellent pillow, Nick discovered. Todd was half rolled on his side, one arm slung across Nick’s shoulders, his fingers tangled in Nick’s hair.

That was the very first day in Nick’s life he woke up feeling safe, not alone, not lonely.