In Dreams: Bleed Out

Time To Adjust

Alexandre blinked

"I had...actually not considered your point about the virus furthering itself, but it is definitely something worth further thought and study.  Some of your other points...bother me, to say the least."

"Carys, if I were to worry about age at this stage, I would never date nor marry again.  Now that's not to say I would date nor marry an actual human child, but as you have frequently pointed out-you are in your thirties and you are currently no longer aging at the same rate as normal humanity, which puts us on more even footing.  But even you, if you were to date a human in their thirties now, in five, ten, twenty years, would they not quickly begin to out-age you?  What then when they start looking like your father, your grandfather, and then inevitably die?  How will you stand the guilt of possibly keeping them from having an eternity if you choose not to share the virus or prevent them from having a life of children, grandchildren, a wife with whom they can age and die?  How does that fit your narrative?"

"I know your past is riddled with tragedies, as is mine.  We are both broken and both hard to live with.  I don't know if the virus speaks for me or not, but if you should choose it, I would happily court you.  I can also promise not to use the bond on you ever again-unless it is to save your life, if that would make you happy."  Alexandre kissed me on the forehead gently and took my arm in his again and we continued our stroll, with me thinking on what he had just said.  How do you argue with a century old vampire?

"Please, please tell me we have blood left."  I moaned when we got back inside the house.

"Is it bad?"  Alexandre asked.  I nodded, but looked at him curiously.

"You've never actually asked for any before and I think this is the first time I have actually heard you use the word 'blood'."  Alexandre answered my questioning look.  I followed him towards the kitchen with the refrigeration unit he had calibrated and had carefully maintenanced for blood storage.  I sighed. 

"I guess I'm going to be spending a lot more time in this room now."  I complained.

"What's wrong with this room?"  Alexandre asked defensively.

"Nothing, it's just sorta..useless..."  I replied waving a hand at the blood as he poured it into a cup.

"Now I do occasionally have company, and parties, and business meetings and staff that works here, so I do have to keep up some semblance of appearances, besides, you can make other uses of a room."  He said suggestively, handing me the cup.

"Hey!"  I exclaimed  "What kind of conclusion am I supposed to draw from that statement mister 'what will people think'?"

"You're the one who pointed out I lived through...several...advances in public s****l openness.  And pointed out you may be open to a relationship with me.  So which is it Carys?"  He asked, drawing closer  "Have you decided what you want?"  I gulped from the mug frantically to avoid eye contract.  The two sides of me battled for control, one seriously considering exploring the other uses for the kitchen, the other warning me that in all possibility I was only feeling this way because of the virus, or the bond, or both.  I blushed and placed the cup on the counter, finally looking at Alexandre, who was now no more than half a step away with the wolfish look on his face.  I put my hand out to stop him and steady myself.

"Give me a little time to adjust, please."  I said softly.  "I can't deny the draw I feel towards you, and I don't want to hide it, but I need to figure it out, and if it's me or the virus, and how much that's going to affect my decision from here on, or if I even care.  I don't want to throw myself into something only to later decide it was the virus the whole time and break your heart, that would be particularly cruel.  Can we maybe get to know each other a little more at least and see where things go?"  I looked at him with a pained expression and watched as it was mirrored briefly on his face as well.

"An old fashioned courtship it is then, Lady."  Alexandre replied with a bow.  "I will honor your request, but I hope you know it will be painful for me as well.  And Carys, I'm not one to give up easy.  The virus and time may have made me less patient over the years.  But that just means I am used to getting what I want rather quickly and your proposal is painfully slow.  I will do everything in my power to win you over quickly."  Alexandre promised with a glimmer of the wolf in his eye.  A shiver ran down my spine, but whether it was fear or pleasure I couldn't tell.  I straightened up and crossed my arms.

"I'm afraid you have met your match sir, for I am very stubborn and will not be wooed easily."  I sniffed and put my nose in the air.  The light growl was the only warning I had before he grabbed me around the waist and tackled me to the ground.

"Challenge accepted."  He snarled in my ear while I squeaked and tried to break free.

As he helped me up Alexandre looked at me thoughtfully.

"You know, this is the first time I've ever had to romance a vampire lady."  He told me.

"First-the archaic phrasing."  I giggled.  "But most importantly, you've met others?  Why didn't I think to ask about that?"

"Oh yes, I've met a few, keep in contact with some.  Vampires don't tend to get along too well.  Maybe it's the increased aggression or maybe the virus creates a sort of territorial behavior so that we'll spread out to infect more.  There's a lot of world to cover.  While we can't necessarily die of old age, well no one knows that for sure, the virus does make many...foolhardy, so some don't last very long...."  Alexandre shook his head sadly.

"But you and I seem to be getting along well."  I pointed out.

"Yes, for a period of time as the virus fully overtakes the system and changes the host, there isn't that much of a clash between the sire and the new vampire.  Additionally, the sire bond helps keep the more unruly young ones under control for a while, but they inevitably come to a state of dispute with their sire and move on."  Alexandre's response was solemn and quiet.

"So that's what you meant when you said I would eventually want to leave you."  I replied horrified.

"Yes, but there is something different with you.  I am drawn to you as much as I want to push you away.  You mentioned something similar before.  Maybe you were right about the virus trying to take the next evolutionary step.  I am not sure.  But the more I am around you the more I am afraid of letting you go."  Alexandre's reply was honest and open, making me blush, so I picked up my mug and finished it off.  Alexandre lifted a hand hesitantly and ran it down my cheek softly.

"Yes, I'm not sure if you stay here much longer I'll be able to let you go.  Just like I'm not sure which side of me appreciates this flush more either."  He murmured softly, causing even more blood to rush to my face.  He tilted his head slightly and the predator look returned so I took a couple of steps back, putting some speed into the move.

"I'm afraid to find out the answer to that myself."  I said bluntly.  Alexandre blinked and his expression cleared.

"I'm sorry Carys, I didn't mean to frighten you.  It just occurred to me I never got to taste you.  You had lost too much blood for the usual means of transfer."  Alexandre offered.

"What does that mean?"  I asked and Alexandre's words of any body fluid ran through my head.  Several horrifying thoughts struck me.

"I fed you my blood.  It was the quickest way I could think of at the time.  Quite a lot too, nearly had to drain myself for you."  He laughed lightly.  "Then I stayed with you, well more accurately, I had to bring you back here to make sure I could keep your heart beating while keeping myself fed, while keeping you alive.  I have a little more medical equipment here and was able to do some direct injections to speed up the process.  I thought you were going to die on me several times.  It was a long night."  I blinked.  He had never told me the full story and I was reminded once again how much I owed him.

"So the look was for?"  I prompted.

"Oh that, sorry."  He smiled sheepishly.  "I had this sudden urge, I didn't know if I wanted to drink from you or kiss you..."  He snapped his mouth closed.

"Do vampires actually do that?  Drink from each other?"  I asked, intrigued.

"Sometimes, it's more of a dominance thing."  Alexandre explained.

"Dominance as in...fighting?"  I stepped closer, curious, leaning a hip on the counter.

"Or sex."  Alexandre replied, and I battled a blush ineffectively again.  "Some claim it gives them more power, but I've seen no proof of that.  It might stave off the desire for blood for a while, but just like any other source, you'll need to feed again at some point."  Alexandre shrugged.

"And you?  Have you fed from another vampire?"  My curiosity got the best of me and the question popped out of my mouth before I could stop it.  "I'm sorry, that was inappropriate, never mind."  Alexandre stepped towards me and raised my eyes to his.

"Never be afraid to ask, even if you receive no answer.  But the answer to your question is no.  I have not and I have only shared my blood with one other, and both of you were human at the time."  Alexandre let go of my chin and looked away.  It seemed as though the other turning was a sore spot for him.  I was curious, but didn't want to press the issue.  Alexandre finished off his mug and rinsed both the cups in the sink.

"Sadly, I have some work that I really must catch up on."  Alexandre sighed.  "Do you have any plans or is there anything you need?"  The tone was friendly but his voice was laced with concern.

"If you're asking me if I can behave myself, then the answer is yes."  I replied, exasperated.  "But I'm really feeling too wired to just sit around right now."  I frowned.

"Then perhaps you'd like to visit the back gardens?"  Alexandre offered.

"The whaaa...??  How big is this place?"  I yelled after him as he left the room in typical Alexandre fashion.