In Dreams: Bleed Out

The Results

"Well, I don't know for sure, that's why I bought the tests.  They may not even work because you're a vampire, or it may be too soon!  Gah!"  He gripped his head and spun around excitedly.  I had never seen him act less dignified in all the time I had known him, and it almost made me laugh, but there were terrifying thoughts lurking in the back of my brain I couldn't ignore.

"But if it is true, we have so much to do!  We need to buy a crib, and the car!  Oh my god, we need a safer car!  And what will it eat?  Will it be human or vampire?  I'm guessing vampire, but who knows!"  He turned back to me excitedly and kissed me on the mouth.  I smiled lightly at him, but his words had brought all the fears to the front of my head.  Inside I was screaming, imagining a bald, deformed, wrinkled creature with sharp nails and fangs bursting from my torso like in a horror film, ready to sink its teeth into whoever was nearest after it was born.

"Ah I'm getting ahead of myself, Carys, the test.  Do you think you can pee?"  He was almost jumping with joy.

"I've uh, not really had enough to drink to do that yet."  I replied.

"Oh right!  Let me get you some blood!  He raced off to the kitchen and I followed him slowly.  He brought a cup nearly overflowing with blood and one filled with water.  "Drink, drink lots!"  He sounded like a kid and once again I almost giggled at him.  If it wasn't for the dread weighing so heavy on my heart, I might actually enjoy this too.  I sipped the blood and grimaced.

"Does it still taste funny?"  He asked concerned.  "Oh wait, that's another symptom, of course!"  He almost danced around the room.  I watched him, shaking my head.

"I just hope I can keep it down."  I muttered and held my nose, draining the cup.

"And now we wait."  Alexandre said gleefully.

For the next half hour Alexandre asked me every few minutes if I had to pee yet.

"No."  I replied over and over, until finally I decided to try just to get him to stop.  He almost whooped, the raced to the restroom ahead of me, laying out a variety of testing kits.

"This one is supposed to have the best detection, and this one is the easiest to read.  I didn't know what to get, so I bought a lot.  I talked to my medical contact and he's agreed to do some further testing if this doesn't pan out."  He hovered quietly.

"Are you planning to just stand there while I pee?"  I looked at him incredulously.

"Well, I was hoping you could maybe try to pee in this cup in case we need to retest."  He offered, holding a plastic cup out.  I swatted at him and chased him from the room, although he did have a point.  I sat for a few moments trying to convince myself I needed to pee.

"Turn the water on!"  Alexandre called helpfully from the other side of the door.  I threw the trash bin at him and heard him chuckle, then turned the faucet on just so he'd have a harder time listening to me.  The running water gave me an idea to torment him.  I filled the cup up and then slowly poured the liquid in the toilet.  Alexandre burst into the room, ecstatic, until he saw me standing there with the cup.  I laughed so hard I had to sit down.

"That was extraordinarily cruel Carys."  Alexandre pouted.  I clutched my ribs, laughing harder.

"Well, on the plus side, I really do have to pee now."  I answered, and he immediately brightened, leaving the room and shutting the door.  Unfortunate side note: vampire pee is an ugly shade of orangey rusty red, but Alexandre looked at it like it was the most precious treasure on earth.  He followed the instructions with three of the tests, putting the lid on the plastic container of urine and setting the tests aside as he went to store the cup in case it was needed later.  I shook my head.  In a way, seeing a man so madly in love with the idea of being a father was infinitely charming to a point.  I looked down at my torso.  I just didn't know if he was going to be a father to a baby, or a monster.  I shivered.  Well, the results weren't in yet, could be a false alarm.  I thought hopefully, smiling to myself.  Alexandre entered the room and saw my smile; mistaking it for sharing his excitement, he scooped me up and kissed me loudly.

"You will be a most excellent mother.  If I had tried my hardest and searched the world over, I couldn't have chosen better."  He lifted me higher and kissed my lower stomach.  I blushed fiercely.  It was hard not to feel the excitement creep in with his behavior, and suddenly I found myself hoping that one day, maybe it could be true for him, but still...

"Don't get ahead of yourself mister, we don't have the results back yet..."  I scolded and he laughed excitedly.

"I have a good feeling about it."  He said eagerly, inhaling the crook of my neck as he set me on my feet.

"Like a tropical paradise."  He murmured.  I tried sniffing myself but I couldn't smell it.

"I'll have to take your word for it."  I shrugged.  I sat on the toilet lid, and Alexandre began to anxiously pace, waiting out the timing specified on the tests.  I grabbed him on his fifth pass.

"Boy, you're making me nervous."  I complained, the feeling of fear was mounting as the minutes crawled by.  He sniffed suddenly and knelt in front of me.

"Carys, there's no reason to be afraid.  Pregnant or no, I'll still love you.  You'll be a fantastic mother one day, whether it's a child of our own making, or one we make our own.  You are the best thing that ever happened to me, and nothing will ever change that."  He kissed me hard, which momentarily distracted me from my fear, though I didn't tell him I was actually afraid more of what a child of ours might actually be.  What the virus might mutate it into.  I shivered and Alexandre rubbed my arms, pulling me to his chest.  I pulled away when I started to feel the nausea threatening to create chaos all over the bathroom floor.  Alexandre held my hair again and wiped my face with a cool towel after I vomited.

"Well, I don't think everything came up this time."  I said wryly.  "I think I still have my spleen."  Alexandre chuckled then glanced at his watch.

"Time's up."  He murmured softly.  "Do you want to look, or should I..."  I shook my head and buried it in his shirt, and then decided I couldn't bear the suspense after all as he reached for the first test so peeked around my hand gripping the material on his chest and watched as the test clattered into the basin.

"What?  What is it?"  I asked sharply and lunged for the test.  A little + showed on the stick.

"No way."  I whispered, then picked up the next one, 'positive' it reported.  "No way!"  I gasped.  The third PREGNANT it happily pronounced.  "No way, no way!  Maybe the virus fiddled with the results, maybe..."  Alexandre let out a loud whoop and scooped me up into his arms.  He kissed me from my head to my lower stomach and then planted his lips on mine again.

"Carys!  We're going to be a family!"  He said breathlessly  "We're going to be parents!"  This was a shout.  Then "I'm going to be a dad."  He whispered reverently, staring at my abdomen as if was made of gold.  A little uncomfortable with his scrutiny, I wiggled.

"I think we should have your doctor friend confirm."  I said cautiously as Alexandre set me back on my feet.

"Oh yes of course you're right, that's a good idea.  I just never thought this would happen.  I spent over one hundred years thinking I'd forever lost the opportunity to have children of my own."  He went from gazing into my eyes adoringly to placing a hand cautiously on my stomach.  "I'm...I'm just so happy Carys."  He looked back up at me with tears in his eyes and kissed me gently on the mouth.  He leaned his forehead against mine, still cradling my abdomen with a gentle hand.  My mind was in an upheaval.  I felt an overwhelming rush of love for Alexandre, while part of me screamed in fear.  I rested my hand on his lightly before he whooped again and grabbed me up, racing to our room to toss me on the bed to kiss me all over, excitedly, then reverentially moved my shirt and waistband out of the way to place his lips on my lower stomach.

"Daddy loves you."  He murmured against my skin.  I shivered, I just hoped that whatever he was talking to was even a child.

Alexandre slept soundly that night, holding me close, curled up protectively around me, one hand on my abdomen.  I lay awake debating with myself what I should do.  I was a vampire, could I even get an abortion?  Would that work on me?  Would a clinic even take me?  My blood tests and stats would all be abnormal.  I chewed a nail.  Plus, how could I do that to Alexandre?  I rolled over to look at him.  Even in his sleep he look ecstatic, like suddenly all the pieces of his world had fit together and made sense.  I traced the shape of his lips.  He wold be so devastated.  And what if it was completely normal?  I looked down at my waist.  I'd never wanted kids, with my past, I didn't want to 'repeat the sins of the father' so to speak, but if it had to be anyone's child, I could never find a better partner.  And if the baby was normal, I could be destroying our one chance at having a child together.  I rolled over onto my back and Alexandre shifted with me subconsciously, cupping his hand over my stomach protectively.  I looked at his hand.  He already dearly loved this child, Hell just the very idea of it, and he'd only suspected it for what, a week or two?  Then another thought struck me.

Could my body even sustain a pregnancy?  I was a vampire now!  Would the virus expel it as a foreign body?  What about the changes in my body, the slower heart rate and respiration rate?  The diet differences?  Did that change the way my body processed and was able to pass along nutrients to a fetus?  Could my body even accommodate the changes necessary in a pregnancy and birth or would the virus reject them as damage to my body that needed to be healed?  I rolled over again.

"Carys?  Are you alright?  You smell of anxiety and you haven't ceased moving since we've come to bed."  Alexandre murmured sleepily.

"I'm just worrying myself silly.  I'm sorry I bothered you."  I rolled back over to face him and kissed him softly.  He hummed happily and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me close against his body.

"I'll call my medical contact tomorrow and arrange some testing.  He's not aware of what we are exactly, but I've convinced him I have a very rare disease, so it won't be too much trouble to push that info a little further."  He said quietly.

"Thank you."  I replied, leaning my head against his chest.

"Love you."  He said with a sleepy smile in his voice.

"Eternally."  I answered and he hummed again. and I could tell he had fallen asleep.