Alan Walker (ManxMan)

Prologue

July 2, 2000

8 years' old Alan

Eight-year-old, Alan Walker laid in bed all alone, shivering. His dark hair plastered to his forehead with sweat, tiny beads of sweat lining up his face and his lips were as dry as his throat. The entire room was hot but the little boy was covered to the tip of his neck with his duvet, wearing a turtle neck and jeans underneath it. He's got the flu and so far no one has come to check up on him and deep down in his heart, little Alan knew his father would be with his new son and wife at a fancy five-star restaurant somewhere. The light in his room were put out and he's all alone.

It's been a year since Alexander Walker, Alan's father, got married to Juliette who already had a son a year older than Alan, who became Alan's step-older-brother. It's also been a year since Alan has seen his mother, she hasn't called or sent an email or anything and he's never felt more alone. His father, Alexander, pays more attention to Juliette and her son, William, not once caring to ask if Alan was doing fine, not once caring to ask if he had eaten, not caring to ask if Alan was doing well at school in the least.

"Daddy, I'm sick." Alan wept, tears rolling down the side of his cheeks. "Daddy, I need you." he cries, still shivering inside his duvet.

The sad thing is that his tears and his cries went unanswered because Alexander Walker, Juliette and William were indeed chatting and laughing happily at a window seat at a five-star restaurant. The three storey house was empty, save for the gardener working around the exterior of the house, Juliette had given the maids the day off. If it was intentional or not, only Juliette knows.

January 2017

25 years old Alan.

"They were on a break, Lou! They were on a fuckin' break!"

"Fine but Rachael broke it off, so she doesn't get to be angry, if Ross decides to console himself by having s*x with a stripper, then it's his problem." Alan argued, pointing at the tv with his fork, a plate of spaghetti in his other hand. Alan and his best friend s***h roommate were having a marathon day, watching friends from the first season to the tenth and so far they're in season six and Alan had to get to his place of work in two hours.

"So if you were Ross you would have done the same?" Louis asked, shaking his head in a condescending manner.

"Yeah! The words Let's. break. Up. were said and both parties agreed to it."

"Okay. Okay let's end it!"

Alan Walker has grown well in the years that had followed. His hair still remained dark and shaved a bit at the side and curled at the top, his eyes were a soft baby that seemed too dull and as empty as he actually felt deep within him. Most times when people see him, they only see his beauty, the fuckable mouth, the sexy eyes and body but no one notices how empty his eyes were and how his shoulder seemed to sag when he forgets himself a little.

He never finished college, he ran away from his house after graduating high school and his father did not once call or text or try to find him. Alan didn't even change his number for six months, thinking and hoping his father would call but, oh how wrong he was.

Alan became a nanny at nineteen, which is a different story for another time. He liked the kids he worked with, never loved them because kids also moved on quickly and forgot faces, he never worked in the place for more than six months and actually adopted Nanny Mcphee's words.

When you need me but do not want me then I must stay.

When you want me but no longer need me then I must leave.

Taking care of kids, takes his mind off things, makes him think less about himself. Alan hasn't dated once in his twenty-five years of his existence, hasn't been any relationship ever and one-night stands quenched his hunger and he's satisfied. What else does he need? He has everything he wants and also has Louis, who has had his back for the past eight years and still counting.

A loyal friend.

A good and paying job.

A well-kept heart, always guarded and never broken.

He really does have it all.